Number 1 tops the chart in a ridiculously strong year for music releases

June 9, 2020 11:57 AM

The 100 greatest UK No 1 singles is a Guardian listicle ranking songs that reached the top of the UK singles chart from the 1950s until today. But there is much more than just the list, including essays by Guardian critics about each track in the top twenty.
posted by Kattullus (55 comments total)

Before the pedants get here, I know that the track at number one in the list is technically from the year 1984, but the version that reached the top spot in the UK charts was released in 1985.

Funnily enough, unless I missed one, that’s the only song from 1985 on the list.
posted by Kattullus at 12:00 PM on June 9, 2020 [3 favorites]

#1 is correct. No lies detected.
posted by Your Childhood Pet Rock at 12:03 PM on June 9, 2020 [4 favorites]

Oh, and there’s a Spotify playlist, of course.
posted by Kattullus at 12:05 PM on June 9, 2020 [3 favorites]

[sad apple music noises]
posted by Your Childhood Pet Rock at 12:11 PM on June 9, 2020

The total absence of Duran Duran from this list renders the whole thing worthless.
posted by biffa at 12:15 PM on June 9, 2020 [5 favorites]

Your Childhood Pet Rock: "#1 is correct. No lies detected."

Agreed.
posted by chavenet at 12:18 PM on June 9, 2020

The total absence of Duran Duran from this list renders the whole thing worthless.

Duran Duran should have had more #1s then.

"Is There Something I Should Know?" and "The Reflex" are the only #1s they had in the UK. Rio? Ordinary World? Girls on Film? Hungry Like the Wolf? They didn't hit #1.

So yeah. Not surprised about a lack of Duran Duran.
posted by Your Childhood Pet Rock at 12:18 PM on June 9, 2020 [4 favorites]

The strength of the 1980s in that top 10, that is ridiculous.
posted by chavenet at 12:26 PM on June 9, 2020 [5 favorites]

Nostalgia cycle is ~30 years long.
posted by Your Childhood Pet Rock at 12:29 PM on June 9, 2020 [6 favorites]

I’d swap “Relax” and “Don’t You Want Me” myself.

“You Spin Me Round” is coterminous with every point in 80s pop.
posted by GenjiandProust at 12:29 PM on June 9, 2020 [3 favorites]

Come On Eileen which was no 1 in 9 countries and knocked Michael Jackson of the top spot it 68?
Chemical Brother's Setting Sun is 49?
posted by Damienmce at 12:48 PM on June 9, 2020

Huh. I'm surprised that The Streets didn't have a #1 over there. Too bad.

Glad to see the super mighty glam-era Suzie Quatro make it in the top 50.
posted by NoMich at 12:49 PM on June 9, 2020

> The strength of the 1980s in that top 10, that is ridiculous.

I think it's more down to the specific writers involved and their formative pop years. Although I mean, the 80s did pretty much rule for great pop.
posted by humuhumu at 12:55 PM on June 9, 2020 [2 favorites]

Tsk. They've had plenty of time to do their research properly on 'Ride On Time'.

'Bohemian Rhapsody' all the way down at number 46; 'Je T'Aime... Moi Non Plus' isn't there at all.

If we've got 'Mouldy Old Dough', why not 'There's No One Quite Like Grandma'? Or 'Shaddap Your Face'?

And incidentally, how dare they presume I have 'housemates or children'.
posted by Cardinal Fang at 12:56 PM on June 9, 2020

I’d swap “Relax” and “Don’t You Want Me” myself

I'm very fond of both but it feels like the top end of the list leans more towards bleak than hedonistic -- The Specials at #2 in particular feels like it's resonating strongly into the current moment -- and that favors DYWM's "a nasty song about sexual power politics" over Relax's "the ultimate banger about banging".

Relax feels a lot more culturally significant though: the ineffectiveness of the BBC's ban, the ubiquitous FRANKIE SAY T-shirts. The Human League made a perfect pop song; FGTH made a moment.
posted by We had a deal, Kyle at 1:06 PM on June 9, 2020 [5 favorites]

Two Tribes was better than Relax.

That driving funk line. It still haunts me to this day.
posted by Your Childhood Pet Rock at 1:09 PM on June 9, 2020 [2 favorites]

Interesting list and worth a listen. (Bands I assumed might have shown up on this list, but didn't, but which does not make the list invalid, of course:

* U2
* The Police
* Jesse J

Among others...but then again, not sure any of their #1s were all that game-changing.)
posted by maxwelton at 1:21 PM on June 9, 2020

I think it's kind of interesting how so many of the lower hits were barely even recognized in the US, the top 30 or so starts to converge, then the top 10 is totally random.
posted by The_Vegetables at 1:29 PM on June 9, 2020

Your Childhood Pet Rock: "Two Tribes was better than Relax."

Krisco Kisses
posted by chavenet at 1:30 PM on June 9, 2020

They've got Althea & Donna, though. Perfect.
posted by scruss at 1:35 PM on June 9, 2020 [2 favorites]

"Is There Something I Should Know?" and "The Reflex" are the only #1s they had in the UK.

The Reflex is plenty good enough pop to be in the upper echelons of this list. No other #1s were necessary.
posted by biffa at 1:36 PM on June 9, 2020

The Reflex is just so... meh...

Like it's the most successful but it's one of their weakest songs. It's like how everyone knows Oasis for Wonderwall when Don't Look Back in Anger and Champagne Supernova were the best songs off What's the Story Morning Glory.
posted by Your Childhood Pet Rock at 1:40 PM on June 9, 2020

Oasis are pretty well known for Don't Look Back in Anger though, right? Like "SOOOOO SALLY CAN WAIT" is at least as memorably bellow-able as "AND AFTER AAAAAAALL"?

Fle-fle-fle-fle-flex, huh. For me Wild Boys is the Duran Duran hit that should have made it to Number One but didn't quite get there. (Also that crazy expensive video...)
posted by We had a deal, Kyle at 2:06 PM on June 9, 2020

→ Someone listened to a lot of Long Wave Radio Atlantic 252 in the '90s.

Since there are no Cranberries or Collective Soul tracks, your argument is invalid.
posted by scruss at 2:26 PM on June 9, 2020

There’s nothing from 1985 on the list.
posted by 1970s Antihero at 2:37 PM on June 9, 2020 [2 favorites]

Nena – 99 Red Balloons (1984)
Too often discarded as a novelty hit, 99 Red Balloons is the best pop song about cold war anxiety in a field full of try-hard duds...

I read that as "dry, hard turds" and - ya know what? It works!

especially if you think of the dry, hard turds in a field of anxiety...
posted by notsnot at 2:43 PM on June 9, 2020 [1 favorite]

I’m surprised that the argument in here is about Duran Duran (much as they’re close to my heart) and not about the singles chosen for ABBA and The Beatles. I’d have gone for “Winner Takes It All” and “I Want to Hold Your Hand”, personally.
posted by Kattullus at 2:47 PM on June 9, 2020 [1 favorite]

Confidential to 1970s Antihero: 1985 wins on a technicality.
posted by Kattullus at 2:49 PM on June 9, 2020 [1 favorite]

I greatly appreciated inclusion of Ian Dury and the Blockheads' "Hit Me With Your Rhythm Stick". As a kid, I bounced around like a lunatic while it played on my dad's turntable.
posted by They sucked his brains out! at 3:06 PM on June 9, 2020 [4 favorites]

A while ago I learned that Milkshake by Kelis was originally written for Britney Spears and I needed to sit alone in a dark room for a while processing that. Today this list told me that Umbrella was also pitched for her before winding up with Rihanna.

Would I like all Britney songs if they had been sung by other people? Is there an alternate universe where Janelle Monáe's Lucky is my favorite song and Slave 4 U by Fugazi is on constant rotation in my gym playlist?
posted by Parasite Unseen at 3:06 PM on June 9, 2020 [1 favorite]

Would I like all Britney songs if they had been sung by other people?

Check out British folk musician Richard Thompson's heartfelt cry of despair, "Oops!... I Did It Again"
posted by Harvey Kilobit at 3:15 PM on June 9, 2020 [1 favorite]

The KLF at #23?

I see what you did there The Guardian.
posted by calamari kid at 3:16 PM on June 9, 2020 [11 favorites]

Beaten to the punch to also point out that #23 is "3am Eternal" by The KLF, who incorporated that particular number in their mythos, but that it is also the only song not on the Spotify playlist.
posted by John Shaft at 3:17 PM on June 9, 2020

The Reflex is just so... meh...
Like it's the most successful but it's one of their weakest songs.

Just a note that this single got to #1 on the merits of Nile Rogers remixing it. If you're going to copy Chic, then why not hire them (well, one of them) to finish the job?

The album track is much weaker.
posted by JoeZydeco at 3:36 PM on June 9, 2020 [2 favorites]

A couple of weeks ago, I listened to the latest track by Daði Freyr called "Where We Wanna Be" (a cheery coronavirus dance pop number! Honestly!)

Then I clicked over to a cute little ditty that he and his wife Árný Fjóla did over the holidays, sung in Icelandic, but it's a cover.

The credits said the music was written by Tony Hatch and Jackie Trent, and wondering who they were, I looked them up. Not only did I find the original of the cute song Daði and Árný were singing, but I found this amazing tiny ballad, which is at number 79 on this Guardian list, and it's really good! Short, but good! I learned that it was written for a scene on a Granada TV show that's since been wiped, but people called into the TV Times asking where they could get a 45 of the song, et voilà!

RIP, Jackie. She'd filed a suit against Tony Hatch for royalties, and died while it was still in court.
posted by droplet at 3:39 PM on June 9, 2020 [2 favorites]

Tony Hatch and Jackie Trent were married for thirty years and wrote many, many MOR classics in that time, including Downtown for Petula Clark and the theme song for Neighbours. Hatch also wrote the theme for the genuinely dreadful ITV soap Crossroads, which was, bizarrely, covered by Paul McCartney and Wings on the Venus and Mars album.
posted by Grangousier at 4:02 PM on June 9, 2020 [4 favorites]

The long form review of The Specials 'Ghost Town' is worth a read. The band might have been falling to pieces, but they captured a national zeitgeist and created a single for the ages with that one. If ever it deserves a re-release now would be a good time.

As a side note, my two kids (8 and 12) loooove the Specials and will often request Ghost Town. Whenever they are horsing around too much, all it takes to pull them into line is a mock Jamaican accent and the phrase 'too much fighting on the dancefloor'.
posted by tim_in_oz at 4:26 PM on June 9, 2020 [6 favorites]

Currently going through the list top to bottom. Wasn't sure that I agreed with their pick for Chicago, but it seems like "If You Leave Me Now" was their only UK #1, so. Maybe that's the slot Duran Duran should've taken.

More importantly, I'm being reminded of how the late 80s through early 90s were ridiculously strong years for dance music. It's great to see Snap!'s "Rhythm is a Dancer" at 69 only to be followed up with Black Box's "Ride On Time" just a couple slots further down.

I also enjoyed the bit about how Rage Against the Machine's "Killing in the Name" hit number one in 2009(!).
posted by May Kasahara at 4:40 PM on June 9, 2020

It always mystified me that Prince hated Sinead O'Connor's version of "Nothing Compares 2 U" so much. He never seemed like the kind of musician who couldn't appreciate other people's art, and it was such a minor track for him I don't know why he would resent that her version was better than The Family's.
posted by tavella at 4:49 PM on June 9, 2020 [3 favorites]

Ȟ̴̢̲̘͇͈͕̖̟͚̎͆̐̎̒̽̔̌͐̚͜ͅȁ̸̘̝̲̠͚͚͔̠̀̏̓̾͗̈͒̑́͜ͅp̵͉̱͍̹̞̰̦̠͓̱̯̑̀́͌͛̓͝p̸̛̱͖͕̳͚̼̱̜͕͚͍̦͎̅̋̀̋̍̂̉̽͜ͅy̵̬̺̖͍̖͍͕͊̉̆͛̇̾͐̄͜ ̸̡̢͇̰̙̝̺̏ͅT̶̡̢̫͖̘͖͚̟̯̈͒̃̏̐̋̾̊͘͠͝ͅa̶̛̛̛͎̜̜̤̽̓͑̀̅͐̑̽̕͝l̶̻̘̰͙̖̬̰̳͙͆̔̈͌̓͌ͅk̸̝̙̯̙̥̼̦͉̺͗̈́̀̈̇̓̔̉̀̎͂̿̂̐͜ - 2 weeks a #1 hit.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 5:05 PM on June 9, 2020 [3 favorites]

oh fuck off, robocop is bleeding.
For that, you get this.
posted by scruss at 5:54 PM on June 9, 2020

Man, Band of Gold is such a great song.
posted by Arch_Stanton at 6:47 PM on June 9, 2020 [3 favorites]

i found a list of all no 1s in the UK

the offspring? chef from south park? bob the builder?

and you guys need to watch it with the bad songs, because i'll do worse*

*20 dollars, same as in town
posted by pyramid termite at 6:56 PM on June 9, 2020 [1 favorite]

Would I like all Britney songs if they had been sung by other people?

Comparatively, would I like all other songs more if they were sung by Britney? *scans list* 100% yes.
posted by Gin and Broadband at 1:39 AM on June 10, 2020 [2 favorites]

i found a list of all no 1s in the UK

That would be excellent - a list of 100 Greatest UK #1s from all the records left off the list. Hoots Mon by Lord Rockingham's Eleven, You're Driving Me Crazy by the Temperance Seven, Shakin' All Over by Johnny Kidd and the Pirates (seriously, how is that not on the actual list?), Apache by The Shadows... and that's just at random going up to 1960.

I'd do it myself, but I don't have the copious free time that I suspect music journalists have found themselves with. I'd probably put House of Fun by Madness in the top spot.

Looking at that list of all number ones, it's slightly suspicious the limited number of artists who got to number one in the first years of the chart, though I've not really anything against fixing the charts - record pluggers have much more interesting taste than the general public.
posted by Grangousier at 5:37 AM on June 10, 2020

Just a note that this single got to #1 on the merits of Nile Rogers remixing it . If you're going to copy Chic, then why not hire them (well, one of them) to finish the job?

Nile Rodgers really is the gd hitmaker.
posted by Your Childhood Pet Rock at 6:03 AM on June 10, 2020

For Apple Music users here is a playlist (not done by me!) Guardian Music Top 100
posted by Gilgongo at 6:20 AM on June 10, 2020 [3 favorites]

Somewhat related: Tom Breihan has been reviewing every number one, US pop hit starting in 1958. He's into the 1980s. (He didn't like today's entry which got a 1 out of 10, but he is usually less harsh)
posted by dances_with_sneetches at 6:57 AM on June 10, 2020 [1 favorite]

I see KLF, I approve.
posted by PenDevil at 7:46 AM on June 10, 2020 [2 favorites]

If we've got 'Mouldy Old Dough',

I'm in.
posted by philip-random at 8:41 AM on June 10, 2020

The total absence of Duran Duran from this list renders the whole thing worthless.

it's times like this that I wish Metafilter allowed image posts, because my shot of a bemused and yawning baby would fit nicely here.

or as Joe Strummer once so eloquently put it -- Duran Duran are no less political than The Clash. They're just arguing for the status quo.
posted by philip-random at 8:44 AM on June 10, 2020 [4 favorites]

I’d swap “Relax” and “Don’t You Want Me” myself.

Don't You Want Me is one of those records I hated on first listen, and nothing has changed over the years. I was already a fan of the Human League. I didn't need that sophomoric pandering anywhere near my dance floors. The song itself is another thing. I don't mind the song. But that particular performance and production -- if there's a hell and I end up there, I know what record's going to be stuck on the jukebox*.

“You Spin Me Round” is coterminous with every point in 80s pop.

Had to look up coterminous and I guess agree. As a sometimes club DJ at the time, I can attest that few records were ever surer fire dance floor igniters. The correct long version of Relax also applies, but in a different, more relaxed sort of way.



* actually, I take that back. Wham's Wake Me Up Before You Go Go is worse.
posted by philip-random at 9:15 AM on June 10, 2020 [1 favorite]

Something I think the authors got right is that an important #1 single should be something that generated - and continues to generate it's own fanbase of a size sufficient to be culturally significant. They are songs that stopped people in their tracks when they first heard them. For that reason it is a great please to listen to a number of them that I have never heard before.
posted by rongorongo at 3:49 AM on June 11, 2020 [2 favorites]

Yeah, in spite of my protestations above, I'd be a liar if I didn't admit that it was a pretty darned solid list. I can certainly see a good argument for at least forty of the selections (and I'm more or less completely out of touch with the past couple of decades pop-wise so that's probably at last fifty percent of the records I actually recognize). Not that I feel a need to listen to some of them ever again having developed allergies over time due to overexposure. But sure I LOVED THEM at the time. Or at least they made me smile in that WOW sort of way that only exquisite pop incursions of the zeitgeist can muster ...

And as for the top thirty, I fully concur with about twenty of them. So yeah, that's what I call a powerful batting average. My personal fave? Well let's just say it's damned amusing to see Thundercap Newman's Something In The Air slotted in at #78 -- the song that soundtracked one of the single most disgusting movie scenes I've ever seen. And it's fun.

Free Money - "Magic Christian"
posted by philip-random at 7:52 AM on June 11, 2020 [1 favorite]

Pet Shop Boys - West End Girls (New Lockdown Version)
posted by Kiwi at 8:15 AM on June 11, 2020