33. The Communist Manifesto
July 20, 2023 9:11 AM Subscribe
Cute concept, could've used a little wilder execution.
posted by praemunire at 9:20 AM on July 20, 2023 [1 favorite]
posted by praemunire at 9:20 AM on July 20, 2023 [1 favorite]
In this year of our Lord 2023, not one book written by a woman, even in an ironic piece like this. I guess those books are not going to make me look smart.
posted by Atrahasis at 9:25 AM on July 20, 2023 [40 favorites]
posted by Atrahasis at 9:25 AM on July 20, 2023 [40 favorites]
I believe Hard Times is specifically mocking the soft boy 'look at me read books that I think make me look smart even though most readers would mark me as someone deeply invested in toxic masculinity because of how utterly performative and male-dominated my choices are' a la The Toast's 'Books That Literally All White Men Own'
but of course this is a worse rendition of that, a bit heavy handed in the descriptions really, and derivative of an already canonical piece of satire though it did get a laugh from me with the inclusion of the Dummy's Guide to Orgo II lol
posted by paimapi at 9:32 AM on July 20, 2023 [16 favorites]
but of course this is a worse rendition of that, a bit heavy handed in the descriptions really, and derivative of an already canonical piece of satire though it did get a laugh from me with the inclusion of the Dummy's Guide to Orgo II lol
posted by paimapi at 9:32 AM on July 20, 2023 [16 favorites]
Loved the inclusion of "Organic Chemistry for Dummies"!
posted by indianbadger1 at 9:38 AM on July 20, 2023 [2 favorites]
posted by indianbadger1 at 9:38 AM on July 20, 2023 [2 favorites]
Tropic of Cancer: It’s basically porn!
I confess, I laughed out loud at that.
Though if you are going to tout the thicc books of 20th century white men that make you "look smart" and you neglect to include any William Gaddis at all, well then you have failed.
posted by chavenet at 9:42 AM on July 20, 2023 [6 favorites]
I confess, I laughed out loud at that.
Though if you are going to tout the thicc books of 20th century white men that make you "look smart" and you neglect to include any William Gaddis at all, well then you have failed.
posted by chavenet at 9:42 AM on July 20, 2023 [6 favorites]
No graphic novels? Nothing to say, hey, it might look like I'm reading comic books but I actually appreciate a cutting edge art form in its prime.
posted by dances_with_sneetches at 9:44 AM on July 20, 2023 [2 favorites]
posted by dances_with_sneetches at 9:44 AM on July 20, 2023 [2 favorites]
"just get yourself spotted interacting with the brand and people will get the hint that you’re a serious sort of person and they should be intimidated" and that brand is Friedrich Nietzsche HAHAHAHA
This was funny. I can personally attest that being a young woman reading Infinite Jest on the train is a hell of a conversation starter. Never carried another book that so many dudes wanted to talk to me about.
posted by potrzebie at 9:48 AM on July 20, 2023 [8 favorites]
This was funny. I can personally attest that being a young woman reading Infinite Jest on the train is a hell of a conversation starter. Never carried another book that so many dudes wanted to talk to me about.
posted by potrzebie at 9:48 AM on July 20, 2023 [8 favorites]
14. ‘Inferno’ by Dante Alighieri
Fair warning, it’s not as cool as it sounds. You would think a book about a guided tour through the circles of hell would be metal as fuck. Unfortunately, this book is part of a trilogy called “The Divine Comedy,” and to add insult to injury it’s not even that funny.posted by kirkaracha at 9:54 AM on July 20, 2023 [5 favorites]
40. ‘Moonchild’ by Aleister Crowley
This won’t get you much notice in normal environments, save for the occasional Ozzy fan who will loudly sing a mispronounced “Mr. Crowley!” at you. But in the right setting, this or any Crowley book is worth its weight in gold. I was king for a day flipping through this thing at a goth flea market one time. Just be prepared to riff your way through a conversation about “the left-hand path,” whatever that means.
(snortlaughs in Occultist)
posted by FatherDagon at 9:55 AM on July 20, 2023 [3 favorites]
This won’t get you much notice in normal environments, save for the occasional Ozzy fan who will loudly sing a mispronounced “Mr. Crowley!” at you. But in the right setting, this or any Crowley book is worth its weight in gold. I was king for a day flipping through this thing at a goth flea market one time. Just be prepared to riff your way through a conversation about “the left-hand path,” whatever that means.
(snortlaughs in Occultist)
posted by FatherDagon at 9:55 AM on July 20, 2023 [3 favorites]
You know the content is going to be of a certain type when you can feel your phone getting hot from processing all the trackers and adtech… before you’re even out of the first paragraph.
posted by turbowombat at 10:02 AM on July 20, 2023 [8 favorites]
posted by turbowombat at 10:02 AM on July 20, 2023 [8 favorites]
Time to market my "Anti-anti-anti-intellectualism for Dummies" book.
posted by MonsieurPEB at 10:03 AM on July 20, 2023 [1 favorite]
posted by MonsieurPEB at 10:03 AM on July 20, 2023 [1 favorite]
'Books That Literally All White Men Own'
I know its a joke and a satire but my husband is a white man, I am a white woman, we live in a house full of books (about 400 I think)
here's the breakdown from that list (cause I should be working but whatevs...)
67 of the 79 books are not in our house at all
6 of those, if they were, would definitely be mine
9 of the yeses are mine
2 of the yeses are his
1 I think we each had a copy of when we met
perhaps I just read like a dude. and perhaps my husband just doesn't read that much...
(if you too are bored/shirking lemme know if you want the book by book breakout!)
posted by supermedusa at 10:09 AM on July 20, 2023 [7 favorites]
I know its a joke and a satire but my husband is a white man, I am a white woman, we live in a house full of books (about 400 I think)
here's the breakdown from that list (cause I should be working but whatevs...)
67 of the 79 books are not in our house at all
6 of those, if they were, would definitely be mine
9 of the yeses are mine
2 of the yeses are his
1 I think we each had a copy of when we met
perhaps I just read like a dude. and perhaps my husband just doesn't read that much...
(if you too are bored/shirking lemme know if you want the book by book breakout!)
posted by supermedusa at 10:09 AM on July 20, 2023 [7 favorites]
Please, you're not going to impress anyone with that mass market Tao Te Ching.
If you want maximum Chinese philosophy nerd cred, this is the edition you want.
posted by 1adam12 at 10:10 AM on July 20, 2023 [2 favorites]
If you want maximum Chinese philosophy nerd cred, this is the edition you want.
posted by 1adam12 at 10:10 AM on July 20, 2023 [2 favorites]
and sorry but reading The Flipping Da Vinci Code anywhere does not make you look smart
posted by supermedusa at 10:13 AM on July 20, 2023 [24 favorites]
posted by supermedusa at 10:13 AM on July 20, 2023 [24 favorites]
If you want maximum Chinese philosophy nerd cred, this is the edition you want.
posted by 1adam12 at 10:10 AM on July 20 [+] [!]
For maximum extra credit don't even bring the book out, just throw a bunch of yarrow stalks on the floor of the bus aisle and squint at them unmoving for the duration of the ride
posted by FatherDagon at 10:15 AM on July 20, 2023 [25 favorites]
posted by 1adam12 at 10:10 AM on July 20 [+] [!]
For maximum extra credit don't even bring the book out, just throw a bunch of yarrow stalks on the floor of the bus aisle and squint at them unmoving for the duration of the ride
posted by FatherDagon at 10:15 AM on July 20, 2023 [25 favorites]
The sheer laziness of including The Communist Manifesto instead of the second volume of Capital drained all the fun out of this one for me.
posted by mittens at 10:29 AM on July 20, 2023 [13 favorites]
posted by mittens at 10:29 AM on July 20, 2023 [13 favorites]
"I’ve spent 10,000 hours trying to look smarter than I am and I owe it all to the O.G king of fake smart people, noted Lolita Express alumni Malcolm Gladwell"
Busted.
posted by adamrice at 10:31 AM on July 20, 2023 [10 favorites]
Busted.
posted by adamrice at 10:31 AM on July 20, 2023 [10 favorites]
We Ranked The Top 50 Comments Based on How Smart They Make Us Look on Metafilter
posted by phooky at 10:44 AM on July 20, 2023 [23 favorites]
posted by phooky at 10:44 AM on July 20, 2023 [23 favorites]
I don't know whether to be relieved or disappointed that no Patrick O'Brien novels appeared on either of those lists.
posted by The Nutmeg of Consolation at 10:44 AM on July 20, 2023 [4 favorites]
posted by The Nutmeg of Consolation at 10:44 AM on July 20, 2023 [4 favorites]
You know why this list is like a dog?
Because it is curtailed.
posted by chavenet at 10:52 AM on July 20, 2023 [7 favorites]
Because it is curtailed.
posted by chavenet at 10:52 AM on July 20, 2023 [7 favorites]
In this year of our Lord 2023, not one book written by a woman, even in an ironic piece like this. I guess those books are not going to make me look smart.
Having exactly one "See, I don't just read books by dudes" author on the list would have been a pretty good bit.
posted by GalaxieFiveHundred at 10:57 AM on July 20, 2023 [8 favorites]
Having exactly one "See, I don't just read books by dudes" author on the list would have been a pretty good bit.
posted by GalaxieFiveHundred at 10:57 AM on July 20, 2023 [8 favorites]
You know why this list is like a dog?
Because it is curtailed.
Yesterday my coworkers and I were talking about berries, and also about electric wiring, and I told them about how my dog was, right then, speaking out about getting electric shocks from berries.
That is, I told them about her current currant current cur rant.
posted by gurple at 10:59 AM on July 20, 2023 [25 favorites]
Because it is curtailed.
Yesterday my coworkers and I were talking about berries, and also about electric wiring, and I told them about how my dog was, right then, speaking out about getting electric shocks from berries.
That is, I told them about her current currant current cur rant.
posted by gurple at 10:59 AM on July 20, 2023 [25 favorites]
GalaxieFiveHundred: "Having exactly one "See, I don't just read books by dudes" author on the list would have been a pretty good bit."
Camille Paglia would be perfect. Not that I've ever read her, but I know just enough about her to drop her name knowingly in a Metafilter conversation.
posted by adamrice at 11:02 AM on July 20, 2023 [13 favorites]
Camille Paglia would be perfect. Not that I've ever read her, but I know just enough about her to drop her name knowingly in a Metafilter conversation.
posted by adamrice at 11:02 AM on July 20, 2023 [13 favorites]
If I see Malcolm Gladwell in your hand, this is the OPPOSITE effect of me thinking you're intelligent.
posted by symbioid at 11:02 AM on July 20, 2023 [1 favorite]
posted by symbioid at 11:02 AM on July 20, 2023 [1 favorite]
I dunno, man, I’ve read a bunch of those and I’m dumber than soap.
posted by scratch at 11:03 AM on July 20, 2023 [11 favorites]
posted by scratch at 11:03 AM on July 20, 2023 [11 favorites]
(came for the list, stayed for the writing, the text itself is pretty funny too)
posted by symbioid at 11:04 AM on July 20, 2023 [1 favorite]
posted by symbioid at 11:04 AM on July 20, 2023 [1 favorite]
ok so if the list did have one throw-a-bone female author who would it be?
my vote is Elizabeth Wurtzle
posted by supermedusa at 11:08 AM on July 20, 2023 [1 favorite]
my vote is Elizabeth Wurtzle
posted by supermedusa at 11:08 AM on July 20, 2023 [1 favorite]
I was thinking more about the mechanics of running the scam. Maybe carry your doorstopper around in an "Octavia Tried to Tell Us" tote bag and hope no one asks you who Octavia is or what she was trying to tell us.
posted by GalaxieFiveHundred at 11:17 AM on July 20, 2023 [5 favorites]
posted by GalaxieFiveHundred at 11:17 AM on July 20, 2023 [5 favorites]
59, straight white guy, English major; I've read 28 of these:
2. Slaughterhouse-Five, Kurt Vonnegut
6. A Farewell to Arms, Ernest Hemingway
7. The first two volumes of A Song of Ice and Fire, George R.R. Martin
9. Catch-22, Joseph Heller
13. The Catcher in the Rye, J.D. Salinger
14. The Godfather, Mario Puzo
15. The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald
19. The Da Vinci Code, Dan Brown
20. The Grapes of Wrath, John Steinbeck
22. The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo, Stieg Larsson
29. John Adams, David McCullough
31. Lucky Jim, Kingsley Amis
35. The Curious Incident of the Dog In the Night-Time, Mark Haddon
42. Patriot Games, Tom Clancy
44. Guns, Germs, and Steel, Jared Diamond
46. The 9/11 Commission Report
47. The Spy Who Came In From the Cold, John le Carre
48. Rising Sun, Michael Crichton
49. A Walk in the Woods, Bill Bryson
55. Into Thin Air, Jon Krakauer
59. The World According to Garp, John Irving
63. Lord of the Flies, William Golding
64. The Lord of the Rings, JRR Tolkien
65. The Bonfire of the Vanities, Tom Wolfe
70. The Big Sleep, Raymond Chandler
74. The Call of the Wild, Jack London
76. I, Claudius, Robert Graves
77. The Civil War: A Narrative, Shelby Foote
Of these, The Godfather and The Da Vinci Code are shite. I've read a Clive Cussler, not the one listed, and it was shite. And like everyone I bought A Brief History of Time but have never read it.
posted by kirkaracha at 11:18 AM on July 20, 2023
2. Slaughterhouse-Five, Kurt Vonnegut
6. A Farewell to Arms, Ernest Hemingway
7. The first two volumes of A Song of Ice and Fire, George R.R. Martin
9. Catch-22, Joseph Heller
13. The Catcher in the Rye, J.D. Salinger
14. The Godfather, Mario Puzo
15. The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald
19. The Da Vinci Code, Dan Brown
20. The Grapes of Wrath, John Steinbeck
22. The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo, Stieg Larsson
29. John Adams, David McCullough
31. Lucky Jim, Kingsley Amis
35. The Curious Incident of the Dog In the Night-Time, Mark Haddon
42. Patriot Games, Tom Clancy
44. Guns, Germs, and Steel, Jared Diamond
46. The 9/11 Commission Report
47. The Spy Who Came In From the Cold, John le Carre
48. Rising Sun, Michael Crichton
49. A Walk in the Woods, Bill Bryson
55. Into Thin Air, Jon Krakauer
59. The World According to Garp, John Irving
63. Lord of the Flies, William Golding
64. The Lord of the Rings, JRR Tolkien
65. The Bonfire of the Vanities, Tom Wolfe
70. The Big Sleep, Raymond Chandler
74. The Call of the Wild, Jack London
76. I, Claudius, Robert Graves
77. The Civil War: A Narrative, Shelby Foote
Of these, The Godfather and The Da Vinci Code are shite. I've read a Clive Cussler, not the one listed, and it was shite. And like everyone I bought A Brief History of Time but have never read it.
posted by kirkaracha at 11:18 AM on July 20, 2023
and sorry but reading The Flipping Da Vinci Code anywhere does not make you look smart
I think it may to people who have read it (or are planning to) and think of themselves as smart. something-something Dunning-Kroeger
posted by philip-random at 11:53 AM on July 20, 2023 [3 favorites]
I think it may to people who have read it (or are planning to) and think of themselves as smart. something-something Dunning-Kroeger
posted by philip-random at 11:53 AM on July 20, 2023 [3 favorites]
Have you ever been reading a book and thought, “I wish a bunch of these pages were blank”?
Lol. Yes.
posted by Carmody'sPrize at 12:13 PM on July 20, 2023 [5 favorites]
Lol. Yes.
posted by Carmody'sPrize at 12:13 PM on July 20, 2023 [5 favorites]
Because I'm sure you care, my stats from the Hard Times article:
50. ‘A Brief History Of Time’ by Stephen Hawking -- Read/ Don’t Own
46. ‘Catcher in the Rye’ by J.D. Salinger – Read/Don’t Own
41. ‘Breakfast Of Champions’ by Kurt Vonnegut – Read/Don’t Own
38. ‘The Stranger’ by Albert Camus – Read/Don’t Own
37. ‘Fight Club’ by Chuck Palahniuk – Read/Don’t Own
35. ‘Do Androids Dream Of Electric Sheep?’ By Phillip K. Dick – Read/Don’t Own
34. ‘Thus Spoke Zarathustra’ by Friedrich Nietzsche – Haven’t Read/Own
33. ‘The Communist Manifesto’ by Karl Marx – Read/Own
32. ‘Tao te Ching’ by Lao Tsu – Read/Own
30. ‘Paradise Lost’ by John Milton – Read/Own
29. ‘Brave New World’ by Aldous Huxley – Read/Don’t Own
28. ‘The Complete Works Of William Shakespeare’ by William Shakespeare – Read (most)/ Own
25. ‘1984’ by George Orwell – Read/Don’t Own
24. ‘The Metamorphosis’ by Franz Kafka – Read/Own
19. ‘A Confederacy Of Dunces’ by John Kennedy Toole – Read/Own
15. ‘Dune’ by Frank Herbert – Read/Own
14. ‘Inferno’ by Dante Alighieri – Read/Own
11. ‘Ulysses’ by James Joyce – Read/Own
9. ‘A Clockwork Orange’ by Anthony Burgess – Read/Don’t Own
7. ‘The Sun Also Rises’ by Ernest Hemingway – Read/Don’t Own
6. ‘Gravity’s Rainbow’ by Thomas Pynchon – Haven’t Read/Own
5. ‘House of Leaves,’ by Mark Z. Danielewski – Read/Own
4. ‘Notes From the Underground,’ by Fyodor Dostoevsky – Haven’t Read/Own
3. ‘Infinite Jest,’ by David Foster Wallace – Haven’t Read/Own
2. ‘The Sound and the Fury,’ by William Faulkner – Read/Don’t Own
and from The Toast, with duplicates removed:
2. Slaughterhouse-Five, Kurt Vonnegut – Read/Don’t Own
9. Catch-22, Joseph Heller – Haven’t Read/Own
11. Atlas Shrugged, Ayn Rand – Read/Don’t Own
13. The Catcher in the Rye, J.D. Salinger – Read/Don’t Own
15. The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald – Read/Don’t Own
16. Lolita, Vladimir Nabokov – Read/Own
18. The Master and Margarita, Mikhail Bulgakov – Haven’t Read/Own
20. The Grapes of Wrath, John Steinbeck – Read/Don’t Own
38. The Road, Cormac McCarthy – Read/Own
63. Lord of the Flies, William Golding – Read/Don’t Own
64. The Lord of the Rings, JRR Tolkien – Read/Don’t Own
66. Beowulf, the Seamus Heaney translation – Read/Own
68. The Satanic Verses, Salman Rushdie – Read/Own
78. American Psycho, Bret Easton Ellis – Read/Don’t Own
So I guess I look pretty smart, and only somewhat white!
posted by Saxon Kane at 12:22 PM on July 20, 2023
50. ‘A Brief History Of Time’ by Stephen Hawking -- Read/ Don’t Own
46. ‘Catcher in the Rye’ by J.D. Salinger – Read/Don’t Own
41. ‘Breakfast Of Champions’ by Kurt Vonnegut – Read/Don’t Own
38. ‘The Stranger’ by Albert Camus – Read/Don’t Own
37. ‘Fight Club’ by Chuck Palahniuk – Read/Don’t Own
35. ‘Do Androids Dream Of Electric Sheep?’ By Phillip K. Dick – Read/Don’t Own
34. ‘Thus Spoke Zarathustra’ by Friedrich Nietzsche – Haven’t Read/Own
33. ‘The Communist Manifesto’ by Karl Marx – Read/Own
32. ‘Tao te Ching’ by Lao Tsu – Read/Own
30. ‘Paradise Lost’ by John Milton – Read/Own
29. ‘Brave New World’ by Aldous Huxley – Read/Don’t Own
28. ‘The Complete Works Of William Shakespeare’ by William Shakespeare – Read (most)/ Own
25. ‘1984’ by George Orwell – Read/Don’t Own
24. ‘The Metamorphosis’ by Franz Kafka – Read/Own
19. ‘A Confederacy Of Dunces’ by John Kennedy Toole – Read/Own
15. ‘Dune’ by Frank Herbert – Read/Own
14. ‘Inferno’ by Dante Alighieri – Read/Own
11. ‘Ulysses’ by James Joyce – Read/Own
9. ‘A Clockwork Orange’ by Anthony Burgess – Read/Don’t Own
7. ‘The Sun Also Rises’ by Ernest Hemingway – Read/Don’t Own
6. ‘Gravity’s Rainbow’ by Thomas Pynchon – Haven’t Read/Own
5. ‘House of Leaves,’ by Mark Z. Danielewski – Read/Own
4. ‘Notes From the Underground,’ by Fyodor Dostoevsky – Haven’t Read/Own
3. ‘Infinite Jest,’ by David Foster Wallace – Haven’t Read/Own
2. ‘The Sound and the Fury,’ by William Faulkner – Read/Don’t Own
and from The Toast, with duplicates removed:
2. Slaughterhouse-Five, Kurt Vonnegut – Read/Don’t Own
9. Catch-22, Joseph Heller – Haven’t Read/Own
11. Atlas Shrugged, Ayn Rand – Read/Don’t Own
13. The Catcher in the Rye, J.D. Salinger – Read/Don’t Own
15. The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald – Read/Don’t Own
16. Lolita, Vladimir Nabokov – Read/Own
18. The Master and Margarita, Mikhail Bulgakov – Haven’t Read/Own
20. The Grapes of Wrath, John Steinbeck – Read/Don’t Own
38. The Road, Cormac McCarthy – Read/Own
63. Lord of the Flies, William Golding – Read/Don’t Own
64. The Lord of the Rings, JRR Tolkien – Read/Don’t Own
66. Beowulf, the Seamus Heaney translation – Read/Own
68. The Satanic Verses, Salman Rushdie – Read/Own
78. American Psycho, Bret Easton Ellis – Read/Don’t Own
So I guess I look pretty smart, and only somewhat white!
posted by Saxon Kane at 12:22 PM on July 20, 2023
If I saw that a person was halfway through about half these books, I’d at least think they didn’t give a crap whether people thought they were stupid or not.
If I saw someone reading Paradise Lost (#30), I’d be interested in talking to them unless I thought it was for a class. In his introduction to one of the editions, Merritt Y Hughes says (or quotes) something to the effect of 'an appreciation of Milton is the last reward of consummated scholarship' which made me laugh at the utter absurdity of trying to claim that for myself, but made other people who liked it seem possibly more interesting to know.
posted by jamjam at 12:24 PM on July 20, 2023 [1 favorite]
If I saw someone reading Paradise Lost (#30), I’d be interested in talking to them unless I thought it was for a class. In his introduction to one of the editions, Merritt Y Hughes says (or quotes) something to the effect of 'an appreciation of Milton is the last reward of consummated scholarship' which made me laugh at the utter absurdity of trying to claim that for myself, but made other people who liked it seem possibly more interesting to know.
posted by jamjam at 12:24 PM on July 20, 2023 [1 favorite]
During the height of the pandemic I remember seeing a bit of a Mandy Moore interview where she was at home in front of a bookshelf and the shelf was full of books by DFW, Thomas Pynchon, Don DeLillo, etc. and I gotta say that it made me like her even more. I'm not sure how I even saw the interview to begin with though.
posted by any portmanteau in a storm at 12:45 PM on July 20, 2023 [1 favorite]
posted by any portmanteau in a storm at 12:45 PM on July 20, 2023 [1 favorite]
Boy, that was a thing, wasn't it? Bookshelf curation during the pandemic. I watched Rachel Maddow pretty frequently, and a lot of people calling in from home were carefully cultivating an impression with the books you could see behind them, sometimes with one or two facing forward for maximum effect. I remember one lawyer who would call in from his very swank high-rise apartment without a bookshelf behind him, which was a nice bit of one-upsmanship.
posted by adamrice at 12:50 PM on July 20, 2023 [3 favorites]
posted by adamrice at 12:50 PM on July 20, 2023 [3 favorites]
Is Baby Rudin on the list?
posted by sammyo at 1:02 PM on July 20, 2023 [4 favorites]
posted by sammyo at 1:02 PM on July 20, 2023 [4 favorites]
Okay, here's mine - fwiw, nobody who sees me reading anything thinks I'm smart, because I'm a youngish visibly queer woman and apparently we can't be smart or even usually read! As many old white dudes on buses have told me.
50 - Brief History of Time - read twice, own paper and electronic. I credit this with kicking me out of the YEC I inherited from my parents.
49 - Great Expectations - read, don't own, hated, doesn't make you look smart, just annoying as fuck.
48 - Art of War - read, own two paper and one electronic. Interesting blend of actual good tactics and just obscenely stupid common sense that apparently Chinese nobles didn't have. One of my Red Flag Books (= do not approach a man reading this in public)
43 - Da Vinci Code - read, raged, threw across room and it landed in the kitchen sink full of kimchi detritus, I regret nothing, it sucks ass. Opus Dei has solid grounds for a libel case. Everyone I know who is even vaguely interested in the Renaissance or Classics visibly winces when they hear this book mentioned. My local second hand store refuses to stock it.
41 - Breakfast of Champions - owned, partway through reading, so far prefer Sirens of Titan. I unironically like Vonnegut because he talks how I think, but it does tend to attract assholes so I read it at home.
37 - Fight Club - read, loved, reread, hated, watched movie, hated more. Own electronic copy.
36 - On the Road - started, hated, stopped, deleted electronic copy.
35 - DADOES - read, it's fine, partner has a copy, I don't.
29 - Brave New World - read for A-levels, kind of fascinating, love the worldbuilding, all goes a bit off the rails when it gets to the reservation. Got an extremely wrong idea about what lupus is from this book, that was made worse by House MD. Haven't reread since I was... 18?
28 - Shakespeare - read most of, it's fine but it's not the way the material's meant to be consumed, nobody reads the whole book in public because it's huge.
26 - Short history of nearly everything - read, hate.
25 - 1984 - read, probably own but I don't know where it is, nasty dirty depressing misogynistic book.
24 - The Metamorphosis - read, wtf Kafka. Read The Trial and liked it more.
23 - Dirk Gently. Read. Pale hollow imitation of Hitchhiker's. Don't dislike.
15 - Dune - read all of Dune including the awful sequels and a graphic novel, enjoyed immensely. The movie version with Sting in it is strictly for drugs.
13 - I Robot - Read. Loved. Read again. Onto third paper copy after first two died. We stan Susan Calvin.
11 - Ulysses - I tried, I really did. Got 20 pages in three times. Have given up.
9 - Clockwork Orange - read, didn't really get, watched movie, first movie I've ever stopped watching part way on grounds of it being fucking traumatising.
5 - House of Leaves - had an ecopy once which was super disturbing, still trying to find a paper copy so I can understand what the heck is going on.
posted by ngaiotonga at 1:18 PM on July 20, 2023 [1 favorite]
50 - Brief History of Time - read twice, own paper and electronic. I credit this with kicking me out of the YEC I inherited from my parents.
49 - Great Expectations - read, don't own, hated, doesn't make you look smart, just annoying as fuck.
48 - Art of War - read, own two paper and one electronic. Interesting blend of actual good tactics and just obscenely stupid common sense that apparently Chinese nobles didn't have. One of my Red Flag Books (= do not approach a man reading this in public)
43 - Da Vinci Code - read, raged, threw across room and it landed in the kitchen sink full of kimchi detritus, I regret nothing, it sucks ass. Opus Dei has solid grounds for a libel case. Everyone I know who is even vaguely interested in the Renaissance or Classics visibly winces when they hear this book mentioned. My local second hand store refuses to stock it.
41 - Breakfast of Champions - owned, partway through reading, so far prefer Sirens of Titan. I unironically like Vonnegut because he talks how I think, but it does tend to attract assholes so I read it at home.
37 - Fight Club - read, loved, reread, hated, watched movie, hated more. Own electronic copy.
36 - On the Road - started, hated, stopped, deleted electronic copy.
35 - DADOES - read, it's fine, partner has a copy, I don't.
29 - Brave New World - read for A-levels, kind of fascinating, love the worldbuilding, all goes a bit off the rails when it gets to the reservation. Got an extremely wrong idea about what lupus is from this book, that was made worse by House MD. Haven't reread since I was... 18?
28 - Shakespeare - read most of, it's fine but it's not the way the material's meant to be consumed, nobody reads the whole book in public because it's huge.
26 - Short history of nearly everything - read, hate.
25 - 1984 - read, probably own but I don't know where it is, nasty dirty depressing misogynistic book.
24 - The Metamorphosis - read, wtf Kafka. Read The Trial and liked it more.
23 - Dirk Gently. Read. Pale hollow imitation of Hitchhiker's. Don't dislike.
15 - Dune - read all of Dune including the awful sequels and a graphic novel, enjoyed immensely. The movie version with Sting in it is strictly for drugs.
13 - I Robot - Read. Loved. Read again. Onto third paper copy after first two died. We stan Susan Calvin.
11 - Ulysses - I tried, I really did. Got 20 pages in three times. Have given up.
9 - Clockwork Orange - read, didn't really get, watched movie, first movie I've ever stopped watching part way on grounds of it being fucking traumatising.
5 - House of Leaves - had an ecopy once which was super disturbing, still trying to find a paper copy so I can understand what the heck is going on.
posted by ngaiotonga at 1:18 PM on July 20, 2023 [1 favorite]
Yes they do, Otto, they just don’t understand it.
posted by Mchelly at 1:20 PM on July 20, 2023 [4 favorites]
posted by Mchelly at 1:20 PM on July 20, 2023 [4 favorites]
‘Do Androids Dream Of Electric Sheep?’ By Phillip K. Dick
While the name is completely different, this book was actually the basis of the cult sci-fi film ‘Blade Lasers.’
A product of Artificial Unintelligence, I presume...
posted by y2karl at 1:23 PM on July 20, 2023
While the name is completely different, this book was actually the basis of the cult sci-fi film ‘Blade Lasers.’
A product of Artificial Unintelligence, I presume...
posted by y2karl at 1:23 PM on July 20, 2023
Anyways it’s a fun piece but the order is nuts (if it’s even supposed to be a real ranking). Maybe I’m just another east coast elitist, but a lot of these don’t ping as “makes you look smart” at all - they’re just books almost everyone has read or at least considered reading if they had time. Catcher in the Rye is assigned in high schools. Dirk Gently is goofy, fun mass market sci fi. Everyone read The Davinci Code. I think they handed you a copy of Blink with your boarding pass at most airports . I dunno, man. I’ve read 22 on the list, not counting the ones I had to read pieces of in college (Darwin, Marx) and I’m not feeling particularly smart or accomplished about it. I would like to read House of Leaves but I’ve been told it’s too gory for me to handle.
Now Gödel, Escher, Bach… that’s one I’m still fighting with. Hats off to the smart folks who read that one. Maybe someday I’ll understand it.
posted by Mchelly at 1:35 PM on July 20, 2023 [2 favorites]
Now Gödel, Escher, Bach… that’s one I’m still fighting with. Hats off to the smart folks who read that one. Maybe someday I’ll understand it.
posted by Mchelly at 1:35 PM on July 20, 2023 [2 favorites]
Your making me cur ansty. Wait did I just accidentally mint some new crypto?
posted by srboisvert at 1:42 PM on July 20, 2023
posted by srboisvert at 1:42 PM on July 20, 2023
Gödel, Escher, Bach
Yoinks ago, there was a website where you put your books in (with a five star system? Maybe?) and it spit out a list of books it thought you would like. It constantly recommended this book to me and to this day I have no idea what it is or what it's about.
posted by PussKillian at 1:54 PM on July 20, 2023 [2 favorites]
Yoinks ago, there was a website where you put your books in (with a five star system? Maybe?) and it spit out a list of books it thought you would like. It constantly recommended this book to me and to this day I have no idea what it is or what it's about.
posted by PussKillian at 1:54 PM on July 20, 2023 [2 favorites]
Book shelves in the background… A lot of people have fake backgrounds in their video feeds so what you see there might not be reality. Or readable. As in a recent video thing I saw. I assume fake.
posted by njohnson23 at 2:15 PM on July 20, 2023
posted by njohnson23 at 2:15 PM on July 20, 2023
A product of Artificial Unintelligence, I presume...
Oh, wrong -- it's by one Dom Turek. But Blade Lasers? C'mon Dom, for shame, for shame.
posted by y2karl at 2:17 PM on July 20, 2023
Oh, wrong -- it's by one Dom Turek. But Blade Lasers? C'mon Dom, for shame, for shame.
posted by y2karl at 2:17 PM on July 20, 2023
pretty sure "blade lasers" was a joke
re: curated bookshelves... wasn't there a post on the Blue a year or two back about a company selling pre-curated book selections for people to show off in Zoom?
posted by Saxon Kane at 2:25 PM on July 20, 2023 [1 favorite]
re: curated bookshelves... wasn't there a post on the Blue a year or two back about a company selling pre-curated book selections for people to show off in Zoom?
posted by Saxon Kane at 2:25 PM on July 20, 2023 [1 favorite]
Anyways it’s a fun piece but the order is nuts (if it’s even supposed to be a real ranking). Maybe I’m just another east coast elitist, but a lot of these don’t ping as “makes you look smart” at all
It's humor.
posted by praemunire at 2:28 PM on July 20, 2023 [3 favorites]
It's humor.
posted by praemunire at 2:28 PM on July 20, 2023 [3 favorites]
Not all of them are this way, but... a few were literally assigned reading in 7th or 8th grade (I forget exactly). And several more were on the lists of books that you had to read a certain number of, of your choice. And plenty were things I read around that same time, not sure if school-related or not.
I mean, seriously, who the fuck is going to be impressed by seeing an actual grown adult human reading The Catcher in the Rye?
posted by Flunkie at 2:35 PM on July 20, 2023
I mean, seriously, who the fuck is going to be impressed by seeing an actual grown adult human reading The Catcher in the Rye?
posted by Flunkie at 2:35 PM on July 20, 2023
In this year of our Lord 2023, not one book written by a woman, even in an ironic piece like this
The author of the very piece your are complaining about is a woman.
Also, I guessed her age within 2 years because her list didn't include Lord of the Rings nor The Anarchist Cookbook, but included The Da Vinci Code.
posted by Back At It Again At Krispy Kreme at 3:40 PM on July 20, 2023 [5 favorites]
The author of the very piece your are complaining about is a woman.
Also, I guessed her age within 2 years because her list didn't include Lord of the Rings nor The Anarchist Cookbook, but included The Da Vinci Code.
posted by Back At It Again At Krispy Kreme at 3:40 PM on July 20, 2023 [5 favorites]
So much of the internet is in service to masturbation
posted by DeepSeaHaggis at 3:51 PM on July 20, 2023
posted by DeepSeaHaggis at 3:51 PM on July 20, 2023
Missed opportunity for a Grimes reference for The Communist Manifesto.
posted by mhum at 3:53 PM on July 20, 2023
posted by mhum at 3:53 PM on July 20, 2023
Why hasn't Amazon made a Kindle with a screen on the back that displays the cover of the book you are reading on the opposite side!?
posted by meowzilla at 4:23 PM on July 20, 2023 [4 favorites]
posted by meowzilla at 4:23 PM on July 20, 2023 [4 favorites]
The author of the very piece your are complaining about is a woman.
Could be Dominic or could be Dominica. The writing suggests the former to me. After all, how many women wpuld drop the word motherfucker in their far from deathless prose? Not many think I.
posted by y2karl at 5:26 PM on July 20, 2023
Could be Dominic or could be Dominica. The writing suggests the former to me. After all, how many women wpuld drop the word motherfucker in their far from deathless prose? Not many think I.
posted by y2karl at 5:26 PM on July 20, 2023
? motherfucker is pretty much every other word outta my mouth ?
posted by supermedusa at 5:28 PM on July 20, 2023 [11 favorites]
posted by supermedusa at 5:28 PM on July 20, 2023 [11 favorites]
Perhaps so. But a close read of all the entrys of said Dom read guy to me. Your mileage may vary.
posted by y2karl at 6:51 PM on July 20, 2023
posted by y2karl at 6:51 PM on July 20, 2023
I found this funny, having read most of the books in the list. I used to read bad books when everyone was talking about them, I would think someone was smart if they where laughing out loud while reading the da Vinci code or a gladwell book on the bus.
I used to print fake dust jackets when I had a 45 minute commute and access to a fancy large format printer to avoid accidentally signaling an interest in conversation. I am thinking what I would print to appear smart.
posted by Dr. Curare at 6:51 PM on July 20, 2023 [1 favorite]
I used to print fake dust jackets when I had a 45 minute commute and access to a fancy large format printer to avoid accidentally signaling an interest in conversation. I am thinking what I would print to appear smart.
posted by Dr. Curare at 6:51 PM on July 20, 2023 [1 favorite]
But a close read of all the entrys of said Dom read guy to me.
Mostly because they are so fucking trite and lame.
posted by y2karl at 7:01 PM on July 20, 2023
Mostly because they are so fucking trite and lame.
posted by y2karl at 7:01 PM on July 20, 2023
Correct me if I'm wrong (like I need to make the invitation), but it's a Hard Times article. Isn't the joke on the widespread notion that books are primarily tools for understanding the reader rather than the writer?
posted by jy4m at 9:44 PM on July 20, 2023 [3 favorites]
posted by jy4m at 9:44 PM on July 20, 2023 [3 favorites]
Real analysis, sammyo?
Huh, would also consider some of the Dover classics… ?Hanming? on diffeq?
Oh! Polya! The second book on reasoning!
posted by clew at 11:19 PM on July 20, 2023
Huh, would also consider some of the Dover classics… ?Hanming? on diffeq?
Oh! Polya! The second book on reasoning!
posted by clew at 11:19 PM on July 20, 2023
Do you mean Polya's Mathematics and Plausible Reasoning, which would be the second book of his most people might encounter after his How to Solve It, or are you talking about vol. II of Mathematics and Plausible Reasoning itself, clew?
I bought a copy of vol. I when I was in high school and carried it around for months without making significant headway. It was among the most beautifully printed and bound math books I’ve ever owned, though.
I also think Rudin's Real Analysis Is a terrible book because he uses the rational numbers to construct the Dedekind cuts, and then redefines the rationals themselves as cuts without bothering to deal with or even acknowledge the huge problems of infinite regress he introduces into the cuts themselves with that redefinition.
Steinhaus' Mathematical Snapshots on the other hand, was everything Polya's book could have been but wasn’t.
And MR Schroeder's Number Theory in Science and Communication is dazzling and wonderful.
posted by jamjam at 12:37 AM on July 21, 2023 [2 favorites]
I bought a copy of vol. I when I was in high school and carried it around for months without making significant headway. It was among the most beautifully printed and bound math books I’ve ever owned, though.
I also think Rudin's Real Analysis Is a terrible book because he uses the rational numbers to construct the Dedekind cuts, and then redefines the rationals themselves as cuts without bothering to deal with or even acknowledge the huge problems of infinite regress he introduces into the cuts themselves with that redefinition.
Steinhaus' Mathematical Snapshots on the other hand, was everything Polya's book could have been but wasn’t.
And MR Schroeder's Number Theory in Science and Communication is dazzling and wonderful.
posted by jamjam at 12:37 AM on July 21, 2023 [2 favorites]
Perhaps so. But a close read of all the entrys of said Dom read guy to me. Your mileage may vary.
This is Dom Turek.
posted by St. Sorryass at 4:41 AM on July 21, 2023 [1 favorite]
This is Dom Turek.
posted by St. Sorryass at 4:41 AM on July 21, 2023 [1 favorite]
Haha,
Finished 16
Started another 4, but never finished
Have no interest in reading any more Hemingway, but there are a couple of books here that might be interesting to read...
Interesting premise, though...choosing books that people think will make them look cool in public.
I'd like to add Love in a Time of Cholera to the list
posted by Chuffy at 8:55 AM on July 21, 2023
Finished 16
Started another 4, but never finished
Have no interest in reading any more Hemingway, but there are a couple of books here that might be interesting to read...
Interesting premise, though...choosing books that people think will make them look cool in public.
I'd like to add Love in a Time of Cholera to the list
posted by Chuffy at 8:55 AM on July 21, 2023
This list has excellant female representation:
50 G.I Joe Characters Ranked by How Effectively They Could Have Stopped 9/11
50 G.I Joe Characters Ranked by How Effectively They Could Have Stopped 9/11
20. Cover Girlposted by riruro at 1:05 PM on July 21, 2023 [4 favorites]
Cover Girl is a supermodel who wanted to prove she was more than just another pretty face, so she became a diesel mechanic laser soldier. She actually might have been able to stop 9/11 from happening if we had convinced her that doing so would prove some weird point about how people perceive her.
13. Scarlet
One of the earliest and most overpowered Joes, Scarlet is an expert in every martial art, every weapon, and covert ops/counterintelligence. If the Bush administration was capable of taking a woman seriously, she could have gotten the job done.
For about the last 20 years, Iʻve been seeding my recording studioʻs DIY resonators/bookshelves with what might be loosely termed "intellectually intriguing books" in hopes that they would get rises from my primarily ad-agency clientele: Alphabetical Africa, The Crying of Lot 49, Watt, A Year From Monday, Baseball Joe At Yale, Finnegans Wake, A Million Random Digits With 100,000 Normal Deviates, Chips Off the Old Benchley, QED, Chicken Little Jane on the Big John, 1001 Winning Chess Sacrifices, Completely Mad, The Woman Warrior, Tom Swift and his Atomic Earth Blaster, Palindromania , etc.
I had actually read all of these books with varied outcomes of comprehension, incomprehension, completion, incompletion, enjoyment, boredom, indifference. So I was ready to discuss.
Over the years, I did get a few rises; but sadly, only from Palindromania and A Million Random Digits With 100,000 Normal Deviates.
A few weeks ago , our city started service on a long-awaited monorail. Iʻm thinking of taking a ride on it, totally absorbed in A Million Random Numbers With 100,000 Normal Deviates. I do suspect the reaction Iʻd get, if any, will be more of the "creepy" rather than the "intellectual" nature. Stay tuned.
posted by Droll Lord at 7:05 PM on July 21, 2023
I had actually read all of these books with varied outcomes of comprehension, incomprehension, completion, incompletion, enjoyment, boredom, indifference. So I was ready to discuss.
Over the years, I did get a few rises; but sadly, only from Palindromania and A Million Random Digits With 100,000 Normal Deviates.
A few weeks ago , our city started service on a long-awaited monorail. Iʻm thinking of taking a ride on it, totally absorbed in A Million Random Numbers With 100,000 Normal Deviates. I do suspect the reaction Iʻd get, if any, will be more of the "creepy" rather than the "intellectual" nature. Stay tuned.
posted by Droll Lord at 7:05 PM on July 21, 2023
G. I Joe characters
I vaguely remember my 8-year-old-at-the-time nephew being Xmas-gifted with one of those G I Joe dolls, which featured a pull-chain dangling off its back. IIRC, each pull would elicit a gutsy random pronouncement worthy of such a fierce warrior. My favorite one, a recording of which Iʻd still gladly give my slightly cavitied right top wisdom tooth to obtain, was "Iʻm going in for a look!"
posted by Droll Lord at 7:17 PM on July 21, 2023
I vaguely remember my 8-year-old-at-the-time nephew being Xmas-gifted with one of those G I Joe dolls, which featured a pull-chain dangling off its back. IIRC, each pull would elicit a gutsy random pronouncement worthy of such a fierce warrior. My favorite one, a recording of which Iʻd still gladly give my slightly cavitied right top wisdom tooth to obtain, was "Iʻm going in for a look!"
posted by Droll Lord at 7:17 PM on July 21, 2023
(previous thread on zoom backgrounds for sale)
Is it usual that someone has the same mental lists of books I’d be attracted to see someone else read and books I think other people would be attracted to see me read?
If two people have the same ten books on one of these lists, how likely is it that the rest of their lists include overlaps?
posted by clew at 8:46 AM on July 22, 2023
Is it usual that someone has the same mental lists of books I’d be attracted to see someone else read and books I think other people would be attracted to see me read?
If two people have the same ten books on one of these lists, how likely is it that the rest of their lists include overlaps?
posted by clew at 8:46 AM on July 22, 2023
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posted by Mr.Know-it-some at 9:19 AM on July 20, 2023 [5 favorites]