EggoNoggo was RIGHT there

December 15, 2023 6:06 AM

"...the fiery burn of its alcoholic components screech in dissonance against the brunchy flavors of maple, butter, cream and unexpected savoriness." Come for the Sippin' Cream, stay for the Doritos-flavoured vodka!

God bless novelty alcohols. I mean, I can't drink anymore, but shine on you crazy diamonds.

posted by Kitteh (33 comments total)

There are entirely too many Doritos-flavored things in the world. Possibly including the actual Doritos.
posted by Foosnark at 6:09 AM on December 15, 2023 [8 favorites]

Wash it down with some delicious Smurfing Beer
posted by chavenet at 6:39 AM on December 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

We live in the End Times.
posted by GenjiandProust at 6:54 AM on December 15, 2023 [2 favorites]

I need to make clear that my old friend Jack Feerick came up with the EggoNoggo bon mot when I posted this on my Bluesky account. All I had was, "Babe, what's wrong? You've hardly touched your Eggo Brunch in a Jar Sippin Cream."
posted by Kitteh at 7:02 AM on December 15, 2023 [7 favorites]

Loggo my Noggo?
posted by chavenet at 7:09 AM on December 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

Last summer, I went to a party where the host had put out the bottle of spirits that a friend had brought back for them from Alaska. Lox-infused vodka. Someone spotted it on the bar, and within 5 minutes shots of it were lined up. It was a delicate shade of light pink. Maybe half a dozen of us drank one, and consensus was pretty universal: it's time to wrap up this whole "humanity" experiment.
posted by Mayor West at 7:12 AM on December 15, 2023 [6 favorites]

"Doritos-flavoured vodka" - Humans, the only species on Earth that hates itself.
posted by tommasz at 7:24 AM on December 15, 2023 [5 favorites]

I mostly drink beer these days, and not much, but I would absolutely try the Eggo liqueur in coffee. Honestly sounds pretty good.

Hard pass on Doritos vodka, though. 🤢
posted by uncleozzy at 7:25 AM on December 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

I never believe this stuff is real. It's meant to be laughed at online and on the late night talk shows so people talk about the brands behind it. Whether it's this or Peeps Vodka at Easter or Pepsi Milk or any of the other dumb blends that flash in the pan. It's not a product. It's a promotion.
posted by Servo5678 at 7:26 AM on December 15, 2023 [3 favorites]

Cut from a similar cloth:

The Youtube channel How To Drink is run by a bartender/cocktail enthusiast who reviews, discusses, and recreates different alcohols and elements of mixology; he's done everything from "the history of [beverage]" to trying to recreate and then improve on various chain-restaurant cocktails to "I asked my bartender buddies to tell me the weirdest cocktail substitutions they got from customers and I'm trying to taste them myself". Two recent videos discuss different "holiday" themed products from various liquor brands and different "holiday cocktail" recipes from various liquor brands. I have a feeling he'll be featuring this on a future episode.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 7:31 AM on December 15, 2023 [7 favorites]

This feels like one of the stupid ChatGPT-made memes I'm being bombarded with by friends come to life - I'm increasingly convinced a decent % of new product development is being done by autonomous AIs.
posted by ryanshepard at 7:38 AM on December 15, 2023

Pepsi Milk

Um, excuse me, it's called Pilk.
posted by TheKaijuCommuter at 7:50 AM on December 15, 2023 [3 favorites]

Last summer, I went to a party where the host had put out the bottle of spirits that a friend had brought back for them from Alaska. Lox-infused vodka. Someone spotted it on the bar, and within 5 minutes shots of it were lined up. It was a delicate shade of light pink. Maybe half a dozen of us drank one, and consensus was pretty universal: it's time to wrap up this whole "humanity" experiment.

I've had a bottle of that for a few years now and it's very good in Bloody Marys. We also had a family Christmas gathering last weekend and my father-in-law was drinking it on the rocks. He was pretty amazed that it existed but that didn't stop him from having a few.
posted by Uncle at 8:18 AM on December 15, 2023 [2 favorites]

Ever had Unicum? The world's only earwax-flavoured drink. Not even students would touch my bottle of that.
posted by 43rdAnd9th at 8:58 AM on December 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

I don’t think I had heard the term sippin’ cream before this year and now it is all over.
posted by munchingzombie at 9:01 AM on December 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

Sippin’ Cream

"Hey Maw, whar'd ye put mah dang sippin' cream, consarn it!"
posted by Greg_Ace at 9:02 AM on December 15, 2023 [2 favorites]

I'm just waiting for the Dippin' Dots sippin' cream.
posted by Foosnark at 9:14 AM on December 15, 2023

I'm just waiting for the Dippin' Dots sippin' cream.

If you have been to Gatlinburg, just outside Smokey Mountain National Park, you may indeed be such a product for sale. In Gatlinburg there are multiple distilleries offering their version of "sippin' cream".
posted by mmascolino at 9:17 AM on December 15, 2023 [2 favorites]

haha (gross) a friend of mine has her birthday today. she has a pretty serious weakness for Doritos, so I sent her the link with a joking plan to get her some!
posted by supermedusa at 9:19 AM on December 15, 2023

I mean, I guess any cream is a sippin' cream if you want it to be
posted by Kitteh at 9:44 AM on December 15, 2023 [6 favorites]

OK, so I had to Google "sippin cream" and... ew? But the important part, related to the title of this post and Kitteh's comment, is:

Eggo Nog Appalachian Sippin’ Cream
posted by mrphancy at 9:44 AM on December 15, 2023

but i like Screech
posted by seanmpuckett at 9:58 AM on December 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

Eggo Nog Appalachian Sippin' Cream

Our Tastemaker's Tasting Notes: "It'll make you feel crunchy on the outside and fluffy on the inside."
posted by virago at 10:21 AM on December 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

Blotto my Eggo?
posted by shinji_ikari at 1:35 PM on December 15, 2023 [2 favorites]

I'm just waiting for the Dippin' Dots sippin' cream.

Again, "Sippin' Dots" is right there!
posted by We put our faith in Blast Hardcheese at 2:40 PM on December 15, 2023 [6 favorites]

Look for the promotional Hold My Hair Out of The Toilet headbands from Goody -- and ask your liquor mart checkout clerk for some if the spinner in the "novelty hooch" aisle is already empty
posted by wenestvedt at 2:49 PM on December 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

Again, "Sippin' Dots" is right there!

Making the imbibers Sippin' Sots.
posted by gurple at 3:51 PM on December 15, 2023

"I'm sippin' lots!"
posted by Greg_Ace at 4:30 PM on December 15, 2023

I don't know if "disruption" as a corporate buzzword ever had any real meaning, but I'm sure it means absolutely nothing now if Doritos is considering itself an industry disruptor
posted by Baethan at 8:49 AM on December 16, 2023

Ever had Unicum?

I poured 3/4 of a bottle of Unicum down the drain just last week. It had been festering in the back of the liquor cabinet untouched for a very long time. I figured it was better than leaving it as one more item my nephews would have to deal with after I die in a few years.
posted by gimonca at 9:47 AM on December 16, 2023 [1 favorite]

That Appalachian hooch brand is universally crappy, but I saved a couple small containers for when I want to carry a bit of bourbon, like for camping. Packaged booze with cream in it, like Baileys. always tastes off to me, but adding coffee liquor to eggnog on ice is really delicious.

I will compulsively eat Doritos, even though I don't really like them much, so I think I won't bother with the vodka.
posted by theora55 at 12:54 PM on December 16, 2023

adding coffee liquor to eggnog

That sounds amazing and I'm shocked the idea never occurred to me! Especially since I've known for years that adding Kahlua to a chocolate shake is pretty freakin' amazing.
posted by Greg_Ace at 8:56 PM on December 16, 2023

I admit I bought a bottle of the Eggo stuff. I only did it because it was on sale for 20 bucks. If it had been full price, I wouldn't have bothered. I'll report back.
posted by kathrynm at 9:17 AM on December 17, 2023 [2 favorites]