Who'll Be The First To Have Sex In The Museum Of Sex?

September 24, 2002 7:26 AM

Who'll Be The First To Have Sex In The Museum Of Sex? New York's new museum opens Saturday. As an online aphrodisiac, it's offering a titillating map of sexual congress in Manhattan, [Click on 1001 Nights In Manhattan and be prepared for a full-screen invasion] as well as an interesting exhibition of photographs by Paul Duda called The Pubic Parade and librarian Ralph Whittington's extensive collection of significative pornography, recently acquired and welcomed by the art community. All of this obviously points to an important, earth-shattering question: where exactly is the funniest place you've ever had sex?
posted by MiguelCardoso (66 comments total)

N.B. I'd say it was safe for work, but work may be different outside Europe - so beware!
posted by MiguelCardoso at 7:28 AM on September 24, 2002

Here's a more direct route to the sex map [Flash required].
posted by MiguelCardoso at 7:33 AM on September 24, 2002

Slough...not exactly funny ha-ha, but a funny place to have sex....
posted by mattr at 7:36 AM on September 24, 2002

St. Pat's cathedral.

Well, it was funny at first.
posted by teenydreams at 7:38 AM on September 24, 2002

sorry, couldn't resist the snark.
posted by teenydreams at 7:38 AM on September 24, 2002

In the butt, Bob. Definitely in the butt.
posted by horsewithnoname at 7:39 AM on September 24, 2002

In a theater. On a catwalk above the stage. Fun, but very hot and dusty...
posted by tommyspoon at 7:47 AM on September 24, 2002

On the hood of my car, in the park, late at night. It was funny AFTER the cops caught us...
posted by MsVader at 7:51 AM on September 24, 2002

In the butt, Bob. Definitely in the butt.

I remember that video clip. I laughed until I cried. Then I showed my wife and she said, "Huh? I don't get it."

I didn't explain.
posted by oissubke at 8:25 AM on September 24, 2002

One of the more interesting aspects of the Museum is that it was advised by queer historians, as well as by the more standard sources (apparently the Kinsey Institute contributed a lot) and so will probably be the first high-profile public institution actually devoted to sex, i.e., in all its many aspects, with an adequate amount of scholarly input. A reason to rejoice, surely.
posted by MiguelCardoso at 8:26 AM on September 24, 2002

On an escalator in a shopping centre (Eldon Square in Newcastle, England).
posted by muckybob at 8:39 AM on September 24, 2002

Here's an interesting article in NY Times about it (I can't remember the Mefi registration, is it Metafilter/Metafilter? not sure, sorry).

Also, a previous MeFi thread on this museum from May.

I plan on going soon and will be back with a full edited report.
posted by witchstone at 8:43 AM on September 24, 2002

In the Colosseum and the Roman Forum. 'Nuff said.
posted by romakimmy at 8:44 AM on September 24, 2002

muckybob:
HOW????????
posted by psychotic_venom at 8:45 AM on September 24, 2002

In a VW Beetle stuffed with clowns.
posted by horsewithnoname at 8:52 AM on September 24, 2002

In the film booth, during a campus movie. Hit my head on the projector and knocked the entire movie out of alignment for a little while.
posted by jozxyqk at 8:57 AM on September 24, 2002

On national television.
posted by gleemax at 8:59 AM on September 24, 2002

On the president's lawn at my university in broad daylight.
posted by kahboom at 9:07 AM on September 24, 2002

gleemax, sounds like you have some 'splainin' to do...
posted by pizzasub at 9:08 AM on September 24, 2002

Apologies to dhartung for not having cited his previous post, making this a formal double. I might have known nothing escaped him...

Romakimmy: The Colosseum, yes, that's curricular - but the Forum? Many a funny thing has happened on the way to the Forum - but in the Forum? Where? Sure, it's grassy but...so open!

Me, I keep waiting for some wag to reply "In bed with my wife, but my analyst says I'm not ready to talk about it yet".

[On preview: take-the-cake kahboom just put an end to all our vainglories.]
posted by MiguelCardoso at 9:10 AM on September 24, 2002

I'd just like to point out for the record (and for my current girlfriend) that it was NOT my idea.
posted by kahboom at 9:14 AM on September 24, 2002

Methinks kahboom doth protest too much...;)
posted by pizzasub at 9:15 AM on September 24, 2002

There's many convienent ruins, tumbled columns, and a bit of shrubbery to hide behind in the Forum, Migs. Maybe you are thinking of the Circus Maximus, perchance, where nothing is left but an oval grassy track?
posted by romakimmy at 9:17 AM on September 24, 2002

Oh I see - the tumbled columns, of course!

*slaps self for missed opportunity and prepares to apologize abjectly to friend who accused him of not really wanting to*
posted by MiguelCardoso at 9:26 AM on September 24, 2002

it was NOT my idea.

Yeah! Is it any other man's experience that, when it comes to sex in dangerous, unlikely or frighteningly public places, it is always the woman's idea?

And that when it's us that suggest someplace slightly out of the ordinary they always go into a curled-up nose "Not here; not like this" hauteur, even if we've been lovers for years? Which only makes it all sexier?
posted by MiguelCardoso at 9:32 AM on September 24, 2002

Many of the descriptions on the map are not so good, which is a shame. I wonder if they could exercise some editorial control in the style of Mr Beller's Neighborhood, or would that defeat the purpose?
posted by liam at 9:35 AM on September 24, 2002

In a hotel bed, with my parents asleep in the other bed.
posted by gottabefunky at 9:46 AM on September 24, 2002

In the barn behind our house during a thunderstorm. That wasn't funny-- that was sizzlin' hot! But the funny part was when we had to dash back into the house through the garden naked, in full view of our neighbors (who wants to put their clothes back on when you are all sweaty and dirty?)

Also in the Museum of Art parking lot, just killing time waiting for the line of cars leaving to thin out. Not sure if that qualifies as funny, but it sure does make me smile in memory.

On Preview: You are right, Miguel...I believe both times were my idea.
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 9:46 AM on September 24, 2002

I'd just like to point out that the Film Booth was all my idea ;)
posted by jozxyqk at 9:47 AM on September 24, 2002

muckybob:
HOW????????

*looks at watch, taps foot*
posted by triggerfinger at 9:58 AM on September 24, 2002

Backseat of car. But with three friends in the front seat.

They were peeking like mofos, I might add! Pervs. The stagefright nearly gave me the heebiejeebies to the point of dewoodification, but I managed.
posted by UncleFes at 10:03 AM on September 24, 2002

Bowling alley.

dewoodification = My new favorite word.
posted by JoanArkham at 10:16 AM on September 24, 2002

Well, the escalator would have to be very long, very slow, or...

never mind.
posted by kahboom at 10:18 AM on September 24, 2002

Standing at the ATM machine outside the Publix (grocery store). Making a withdrawal and a deposit at the same time! (Her idea.)
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 10:37 AM on September 24, 2002

Come on muckybob, more details...
posted by zeoslap at 11:12 AM on September 24, 2002

On the side of the road, in the woods, in Virginville, PA
posted by davros42 at 11:28 AM on September 24, 2002

Phone Booth in a building near Columbus Circle in NYC.

I was on hold a while.
posted by jonmc at 11:30 AM on September 24, 2002

On top of an apartment block near Tompkins Sq, Manhattan at sunrise. With a dancer from Dallas. Who I'd met in Nevada.

Apparently Iggy Pop has/had an apartment that overlooked...dunno if he's an early riser [insert joke here]

muckybob: I'm guessing you'd been out in the Bigg Market that night...
posted by i_cola at 11:36 AM on September 24, 2002

In a very crowded rest area on I-95.
posted by SweetIceT at 11:49 AM on September 24, 2002

Also while driving on I-95 as a matter of fact.
posted by SweetIceT at 11:50 AM on September 24, 2002

Does it count if I was alone?
posted by mr_crash_davis at 11:58 AM on September 24, 2002

In the Serpentine Gallery in Hyde Park, London, or behind a large stuffed snake (among other things) in the Museum of Natural History.
posted by Cicerius at 12:22 PM on September 24, 2002

In the upstairs men's room of a community college on a Saturday night, right after my last scene in a play I was performing in.

Oh, and I was wearing a kilt.
posted by starvingartist at 12:39 PM on September 24, 2002

Does it count if I was alone?

Crash, that totally counts.

So spill it. (No pun intended)
posted by triggerfinger at 12:46 PM on September 24, 2002

Why do I feel like it's the last day of camp and I walked into the middle of a truth or dare game?
posted by witchstone at 12:52 PM on September 24, 2002

In a park early in the morning, which is only funny because we didn't know that there was a community race that was going to run right past us. Very, very embarassing.
posted by Raichle at 1:06 PM on September 24, 2002

In the butt, Bob. Definitely in the butt.

I remember that video clip. I laughed until I cried. Then I showed my wife and she said, "Huh? I don't get it."

I didn't explain.

oissubke, that video clip is worth $10,000 to Bob.
posted by euphorb at 2:04 PM on September 24, 2002

In the porn section of a video store.

I'm a skank.
posted by brittney at 2:08 PM on September 24, 2002

In the porn section with Brittney.

I'm a Thunderslut.
posted by ColdChef at 2:16 PM on September 24, 2002

The coat check room of the club where my wedding reception was held.

Good thing it was warm enough to go without coats.
posted by Dreama at 2:17 PM on September 24, 2002

Try this clip on for size, eh?
posted by mr_crash_davis at 2:43 PM on September 24, 2002

Egads--I completely forgot this until you folks had to go scrabbling about in my innermost psyche: the dough room in the pizza delivery place my boyfriend worked. We were covered in flour. Covered.

Think about that the next time you call Domino's....
posted by readymade at 2:44 PM on September 24, 2002

Hokay. Who can resist this? Outside, midwinter in Alberta, at 35 below, in the middle of nowhere. Under a full moon at 2 am on a bridge after wandering through Venice for hours. Back of a Greyhound bus between Calgary and Edmonton, on my 20th birthday. In a public restroom in Milan. Hippie schoolbus, while his girlfriend slept unknowingly beside us (I was young and inconsiderate).
posted by jokeefe at 5:49 PM on September 24, 2002

Tuolumne Meadows, Yosemite, 10,000ft.
Ex-Israeli secret service women.
That's my story, and I'm sticking to it.
posted by plemeljr at 7:32 PM on September 24, 2002

can't. stop. blushing.
posted by whatnot at 7:33 PM on September 24, 2002

you mean, other than the Oval Office?
posted by Vidiot at 7:50 PM on September 24, 2002

On a dune, between two homes a few blocks from where I lived at the time. It was right below a big living room window, where the inhabitants were completely unaware of the hijinx less than 10 feet away.

"secret service women"

Typo, or a whole 'nother level of interesting story?
posted by majick at 7:52 PM on September 24, 2002

[ot]
Tuolumne Meadows, Yosemite - We camped there when I was a kid. Great place for it.
[/ot]

In the main hallway of my high school.
posted by y6y6y6 at 8:08 PM on September 24, 2002

majick - what is written is what happened, 'nuff said.
posted by plemeljr at 8:15 PM on September 24, 2002

In high school, I got to third base during a church service while holding a bible over her lap.
posted by goethean at 8:29 PM on September 24, 2002

As I type
posted by ?! at 8:37 PM on September 24, 2002

this.
posted by ?! at 9:20 PM on September 24, 2002

In the bathroom at the Prada "epicenter" store in NYC (we wuz busted).

In the chapel at Mills College.

On the roof of 30th Street Station in Philadelphia.

In the women's room of the top (57th?) floor of the building in which the ICC is located in Shinjuku.

Heh heh heh.
posted by adamgreenfield at 1:02 AM on September 25, 2002

Oh, and i cola? Monsieur Pop indeed did have a place in the Christadora House on B.
posted by adamgreenfield at 1:04 AM on September 25, 2002

Miguel: Not to worry, it didn't seem to have much to recommend discussion, an error you solved via an old stand-by. Er, lay-by.

Colonel Mustard, in the conservatory, with the candlestick. Er ... what game is this?
posted by dhartung at 2:50 AM on September 25, 2002

Michigan State Fair Grounds, while some band was playing at some thing I was totally drunk at.

Cedar Point, the amusement park in Sandusky, OH.
posted by adampsyche at 4:25 AM on September 25, 2002