ready.gov

February 18, 2003 5:47 PM

Tom Ridge wants you to be ready.Kind of like Airtoons for the Homeland. I particularly like how Texas is the location of the radiation threat.
posted by MattS (26 comments total)

Local authorities may not be able to immediately provide information on what is happening and what you should do. However, you should watch TV, listen to the radio, or check the Internet often for official news and information as it becomes available.

In other words, just stay indoors while only the truely derserving enjoy the Earth.

"Aww ma, but I wanna go out and play!"
posted by LouReedsSon at 6:02 PM on February 18, 2003

So how would you know something is happening in the first place? Ahhh... the mushroom cloud and the foul odor... got it.
posted by Witty at 6:24 PM on February 18, 2003

...you should watch TV, listen to the radio, or check the Internet often...

Not to mention turning your day upside down just to make time to address one of these tasks. I'm delegating each one to a family member to more efficiently cover all basis. My neighbor and I have been practicing our morse code for a couple weeks now (he always wanted to be a sailor). We're using flashlights with cardboard flaps attached to the lens. It's a bit clumsy, but effective. We've also decided to use code names... can't be too careful.

--. --- - / .- -. -.-- / -- --- .-. . / -... . . .-. / -.. ..- -.. . ..--..
posted by Witty at 6:31 PM on February 18, 2003

feh, this is a well designed and useful site.
posted by machaus at 6:41 PM on February 18, 2003

Boogie down with the atomic platters next time you're stuck in your safe room for a few days....music and clips to entertain you during armageddon.
posted by madamjujujive at 6:59 PM on February 18, 2003

Buy duct tape now! Lots of it. Seal yourself inside your house, and you will not be harmed. Oxygen? Who needs it.

Really, isn't this going to cause more people to be more frightened for no reason what so ever? As Witty said, how are you supposed to know, when you see the mushroom cloud. Ah shoot, too late. You've been vaporized.

Wasn't it not too long ago we were being told, "go about your lives in your normal state of affairs, or the terrorists win"? Now we are being told to hide in our homes, frightened.

Or how transparent is it they want to stir up the fear right before they go to get their new resolution to attack Iraq, despite the fact that they have no connection to the group that attacked us.
posted by benjh at 7:15 PM on February 18, 2003

well, at least part of the old TIA logo is getting some work.
posted by grabbingsand at 7:26 PM on February 18, 2003

Really, isn't this going to cause more people to be more frightened for no reason what so ever?

Oh, there's a reason, but if we start talking about it Steve's gonna use the term "circle-jerk" again and make me feel all uncomfortable.
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 7:29 PM on February 18, 2003

Don't worry. Get out and party.
posted by eatitlive at 7:41 PM on February 18, 2003

Duck and cover anyone?
posted by aladfar at 7:42 PM on February 18, 2003

don't make me use it!
posted by Steve_at_Linnwood at 8:13 PM on February 18, 2003

Don't be afraid... Be Ready

Oh, puh-leeze. More government hype bullshit designed to scare those American sheep who cannot reason for themselves.

The global situation today is no different than it was before 9/11. The only difference today is the general American's awareness of that global situation.
posted by mischief at 8:15 PM on February 18, 2003

benjh, alot of people want to know "What should I do" as evident of the massive duct tape buying binges....

It is much better than not giving information...
posted by Steve_at_Linnwood at 8:16 PM on February 18, 2003

Think it's a very good site -- a central source of information for everyday citizens to learn and prepare -- just in case.
posted by davidmsc at 8:31 PM on February 18, 2003

So, I figured, the real reason is not oil, but selling more duct tape!
posted by MzB at 8:35 PM on February 18, 2003

This is my favorite picture. The Citizen takes a moment to ponder the meaning of the dead animals. Could they have any connection to the biohazard symbol floating in the air? Can he be sucked into the orange spiral in the background?
posted by faustessa at 8:45 PM on February 18, 2003

Depending on your circumstances and the nature of the attack, the first important decision is whether you stay put or get away. Or, it might be better to get away.

Indeed.
posted by normy at 9:01 PM on February 18, 2003

One thing I've noticed is how eerily calm things were on 9/12/2001. In New York.

There was certainly less anxiety than is generated daily by the Department of Terror... er, Homeland Security.

Incidentally if you want to feature the current level of terror on your website, try this address: http://www.wackyneighbor.com/ashcroft/ (although their CGI seems to be down at the moment). I put it on my site, but otherwise have no association to the site.
posted by clevershark at 9:06 PM on February 18, 2003

i love, absolutely love, the iconic design that comes along with this site (and apparently i'm not the only one).

definitely worth linking for that alone.
posted by fishfucker at 10:29 PM on February 18, 2003

eatitlive: Don't worry. Get out and party.

Can I have this on a t-shirt, please?
posted by LeiaS at 11:16 PM on February 18, 2003

For all their faults, and their habit of removing information when it doesn't jibe with the media play (Enron, TIA) - the Bushies are doing a good job keeping the administration web-enabled.
posted by owillis at 11:36 PM on February 18, 2003

It's about time that Get Your War On guy got some new clip art. But where's Voltron? We miss you, Voltron!
posted by arto at 1:23 AM on February 19, 2003

I never thought fascism could be so helpful.

Thanks Tom Ridge and all you wrasslin', depantsin', white washin' (when the snow falls) elitist pricks. We could never live a life worth livin' without you. Kudos.
posted by crasspastor at 1:33 AM on February 19, 2003

Can I have this on a t-shirt, please?

Why not?
posted by eatitlive at 12:56 AM on February 20, 2003

Excellent T-Shirts! Here's a site where someone made clever captions to all the illustrations in the categories under Be Informed.
posted by sparky at 9:44 AM on February 23, 2003

Incidentally if you want to feature the current level of terror on your website, try this address: http://www.wackyneighbor.com/ashcroft/ (although their CGI seems to be down at the moment). I put it on my site, but otherwise have no association to the site.

WackyNeighbor's Ashcroft images are great! I especially like the Red Alert.

Or you can try these Enhanced Terror Alert Colors. 23 new shades of fear, from Maroon to Fuchsia. The Javascript snippet will add a new (randomized) alert color graphic to your page each time it's loaded.

P.S. I tried to catalog all the Ready.gov parodies I could find as of yesterday. A brief addition of my own is at bottom. Anyone spot any that I missed?
posted by Artifice_Eternity at 8:33 AM on February 25, 2003