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takes the edge off, uh, water.
July 21, 2003 12:01 PM   Subscribe

Alcoholic Spring Water. For those who don't like caffeine, fluoride, "fitness", or extra oxygen in their water....or caffeine , "energy", or extra water in their beer, i guess.
posted by serafinapekkala (32 comments total)

 
i quote Adam Sandler: "Who are the ad wizards who came up with this one?" next up, vitamin-laced donuts and Prozac in the office water cooler, please...
posted by serafinapekkala at 12:03 PM on July 21, 2003


Why ruin the Alcohol?
posted by DBAPaul at 12:05 PM on July 21, 2003


"Alternative alcohol products have been the rage of lifestyle cities around the world. Thrill seekers and tastemakers in your market are eager to try DNA. It's an "Australian original." Go for it...with a vengeance!"

hahaha

Classic marketing speak
posted by trbrts at 12:07 PM on July 21, 2003


oh my. my imagination has just been hijacked.
posted by quonsar at 12:10 PM on July 21, 2003


I believe I'll also max the envelope and push the extreme, living in one of the worlds great "lifestyle cities..."
posted by jon_kill at 12:11 PM on July 21, 2003


The caffeinated beer ahs 220 mg of caffeine added by them..

My bladder is pointing a gun at me warnig me off .

So how many people have died from teh red bull | vodka stuff? and they're selling this how exactly?

/not ever getting this stuff in Canada
posted by Space Coyote at 12:13 PM on July 21, 2003


Back in my day, we called alcoholic water by its original name: American beer.
posted by vraxoin at 12:15 PM on July 21, 2003


vraxoin:Back in my day, we called alcoholic water by its original name: American beer.

heh.

The price is the real question, how much profit can they make from adding flavouring and alcohol to water. Pretty smart.
posted by knapah at 12:20 PM on July 21, 2003


So how many people have died from teh red bull | vodka stuff? and they're selling this how exactly?

You have a citation for this Space Coyote?
posted by shagoth at 12:21 PM on July 21, 2003


No thanks, I'll just stick to Nico Water.
posted by brownpau at 12:24 PM on July 21, 2003


a citation
posted by linux at 12:25 PM on July 21, 2003


DNA launches its asault on North America in Spring of 2000.

Not only are they really late, they also can't spell very well.

posted by Samsonov14 at 12:27 PM on July 21, 2003


Oh crap. The italics should be plain text, and vice versa. Gotta lay off the water.
posted by Samsonov14 at 12:28 PM on July 21, 2003


Back in my day, we called alcoholic water by its original name: American beer.

Coor's Light is not called "God's Water" for nothin'!
posted by G_Ask at 12:41 PM on July 21, 2003


"A refreshingly clever combination"

I'm sure they would like to think so.
posted by carfilhiot at 12:41 PM on July 21, 2003


A third person died after drinking several cans of the energy drink following a heavy workout at the gym.

Jesus. Was he TRYING to make his heart explode? "I know, I'll go for a heavy workout, to increase my heart rate, and then down massive quantities of stimulants!"

Red Bull and Vodka is passé anyway. Red Bull and Jagermeister is where it's at.
posted by nath at 12:44 PM on July 21, 2003


A refreshing combination of clear spring water, natural fruit flavor, with an alcohol level of 5%.

[david spade]
I liked this the first time I had it... wwwwwhen it was called ZIMA.
[/spade]
posted by soyjoy at 12:45 PM on July 21, 2003


*barf*
...had some of the DNA a couple years ago...
*barf*
...tasted like a watered down 40 of Olde English 800 with the Kool-Aid man's sock wrung out in it...
*barf*
posted by sklero at 12:59 PM on July 21, 2003


How can people drink water? Fish fuck in it.
posted by jonmc at 1:05 PM on July 21, 2003


soyjoy and jonmc, you are making my day, tee hee...

as for watered down 40 of Olde English 800 with the Kool-Aid man's sock wrung out in it, sounds like a spin-off of "Cold Cocked," as advertised by Tim Meadows channelling Billy Dee Williams on SNL...
posted by serafinapekkala at 1:13 PM on July 21, 2003


Kool-Aid man's sock wrung out in it...

OH YEAH!!!!!!!

Sklero, congratulations on combining two two two fetishes in one nasty, yet persistant, meme.
posted by ursus_comiter at 1:13 PM on July 21, 2003


hmmm, check out all the other legitimate products sold by the makers of the Oxygen Water...looks like they've cornered the market, but on what?
posted by serafinapekkala at 1:16 PM on July 21, 2003


"How can people drink water? Fish fuck in it."

This sounds like a question for user 10313.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 1:25 PM on July 21, 2003


A refreshing combination of clear spring water, natural fruit flavor, with an alcohol level of 5%

...if you're a wuss.

Everyone knows that whatcha do is dump a whole bunch of off-brand kool-aid into a (clean) 32-gallon trash can, dump in, oh, 3 or so fifths of Everclear, fill with water and mix, and add bits of fresh fruit as floaters. A couple 2-liter bottles of ginger ale are a nice touch, too.

Grain punch, aka Purple Jesus: friends of college students everywhere
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 1:26 PM on July 21, 2003


"Everyone knows that whatcha do is dump a whole bunch of off-brand kool-aid into a (clean) 32-gallon trash can, dump in, oh, 3 or so fifths of Everclear, fill with water and mix, and add bits of fresh fruit as floaters. A couple 2-liter bottles of ginger ale are a nice touch, too."

Skip the middleman by carving a plug out of a watermelon, draining it, and then filling the melon to overflowing with vodka and replacing the plug. Repeat every few hours until melon will absorb no more vodka.

Store in icy-cold creek, cooler, or refrigerator for several hours, slice or ball, enjoy.

Kids, don't try this at home.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 1:31 PM on July 21, 2003


When I first started college, I used to swipe a pint of 100% pure grain alcohol (used for pickling little dead critters) from the science lab where I worked (part of my financial aid), mix it with a WHOLE MESS of juice or Kool-Aid, and voila, instant cheap booze!

Jeez, that was soooooo stupid.
posted by elendil71 at 2:52 PM on July 21, 2003


no, no, no, you soak the fruit in everclear overnight, then add the off brand kool aid. it makes it much deadlier!

and also, this is not the first time i've talked about jungle juice on metafilter.
posted by sugarfish at 2:55 PM on July 21, 2003


"When I first started college, I used to swipe a pint of 100% pure grain alcohol (used for pickling little dead critters) from the science lab where I worked..."

Did you strain out the dead critter parts first or did you like it chunky-style?
posted by mr_crash_davis at 2:59 PM on July 21, 2003


elendil: The day they stopped making Berry Blue was a sad one indeed. Pure alcohol + Berry Blue (or Purplesaurus Rex) Koolaide == comfortably numb midway through a week-long hike.

OP: Bah! They're freakin' vodka coolers. It's a continuing mystery to my that people pay for pure water and alcohol.
posted by bonehead at 3:16 PM on July 21, 2003


Why is this "refreshing" "drink" called DNA? Surely Tim Leary is rolloing over in his grave...oh, wait, they shot him off into space, didn't they.
posted by kozad at 4:09 PM on July 21, 2003


Rolloing?
posted by kozad at 4:09 PM on July 21, 2003


hahahahah soyjoy :) good one
posted by shadow45 at 4:59 AM on July 22, 2003


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