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Latest media stunt: hot girl-on-girl gridiron action!
December 3, 2003 10:48 AM   Subscribe

This Super Bowl halftime, make it to the Lingere Bowl. American TV hits a new low by inventing another sport along the lines of Foxy Boxing and Hot Oil Wrestling. The gridiron action features Team Dream vs. Team Euphoria (featuring washed-up former NFL players as coaches) in full contact football while wearing skimpy clothing. Even weirder, but there will be cheerleaders to cheerlead the players that are already dolled up to look like cheerleaders in some sort of subtle hot lesbian action. It's all pay-per-view, but this "Girls Gone Football" seems more like a new low than a step forward for real women's sports.
posted by mathowie (40 comments total)

 
I think we now know what matt wants for christmas.
posted by item at 11:08 AM on December 3, 2003


Anyone remember GLOW from back in the day?
posted by dr_dank at 11:12 AM on December 3, 2003


When I first heard about this, I commented to some friends that they should make a real game out of it by having the models square off against the Arizona Cardinals. It'd be a nail-biter.
posted by Skot at 11:12 AM on December 3, 2003


New low? Not even!

Best. Idea. Ever.
posted by eyeballkid at 11:15 AM on December 3, 2003


I remember GLOW, it was on Saturday afternoons (in the time slot now usually taken up by infomercials). I actually know one of them, albeit casually. She seldom if ever mentions it, which I guess is hardly surprising.
posted by tommasz at 11:29 AM on December 3, 2003


the players that are already dolled up to look like cheerleaders in some sort of subtle hot lesbian action.

Damn you, subtlety! I want overt hot lesbian action!

Anyway, Matt, I doubt this is either a "step forward" or "a new low" for real women's sports. It's just a side show. I doubt any of the viewers will be paying money to actually see a good football game. It is pretty humerous that LT is involved, though.
posted by pardonyou? at 11:37 AM on December 3, 2003


I don't see where it mentions that they'll be wearing "skimpy clothing" while they play full-contact football (although the name certainly implies it). Did I miss something?
posted by mr_crash_davis at 11:42 AM on December 3, 2003


Matt, I'm beginning to doubt your commitment to Sparkle Motion.
posted by dobbs at 11:44 AM on December 3, 2003


I, for one... am conflicted. Stuff like this always makes me feel like Homer having to choose between Marge and a donut.
posted by Oddly at 11:50 AM on December 3, 2003


Not a new low but hardly a defining moment in women's rights. Just silly.

So, fess up - any buyers?
posted by widdershins at 11:57 AM on December 3, 2003


Interestingly, it's sponsored by Dodge.
posted by nickmark at 11:57 AM on December 3, 2003


The other weird thing is that the site is emblazoned with amfAR logos. What a weird way to raise money for AIDS research.
posted by mathowie at 12:01 PM on December 3, 2003


That fact that this is happening is not surprising but the fact that that it is sponsored by Dodge.
posted by Mick at 12:04 PM on December 3, 2003


Last season, Katie Hnida became the first female to participate in a Division 1-A football game. She attempted to kick an extra point for the University of New Mexico Lobos in the Las Vegas Bowl but it was blocked. Maybe if she wore lingerie...
posted by jabo at 12:05 PM on December 3, 2003


This lingerie bowl will never equal the nail-biting thrills of Bud Bowl.
posted by halleck23 at 12:35 PM on December 3, 2003


I am continuously befuddled by the merger of sports and sex. Nothing about football makes me think about sex (though sometimes it is useful to think about baseball during sex, as it were). I have always thought that cheerleaders are put there so that those who are more strongly drawn to the homoerotic aspect can quickly snap themselves back into non-ironic macho heterodom whenever need be by lookin' at them pretty ladies.

Anything that reinforces the stereotype that people are stupid because they like sports ought to be revisited.
posted by Ignatius J. Reilly at 12:43 PM on December 3, 2003


Anyone remember GLOW from back in the day?


Two words: Mt. Fuji
posted by archimago at 1:07 PM on December 3, 2003


Oh c'mon IJR, why do you think they call it fantasy football? I'm going out on a limb and speaking for all hetero women football fans (perhaps a small demographic here), but . . . we look at the butts. Can't help it. The pants and gear and all. I would think guys couldn't help it either, so your anti-homoeroticism idea may be correct.
posted by rainbaby at 1:09 PM on December 3, 2003


Man That LT Is Amazing

Remember The Time He & His All Star Team Of Pro Football Washup's Took On Bam Bam Bigalow & His Cronies At Wrestlemania!

Or What About That Time LT Snorted All That Coke, Killed A Cowboys Cheerleader & Found Christ!

Now He's Coaching Hot Sluts Who Are Gonna Play Some New Game That Combines Football & Moves Last Seen In "Where The Boys Aren't 17" Hot Diggity Dog....

Don Kings Right...

GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!
posted by Dreamghost at 1:15 PM on December 3, 2003


I for one am anxious to pay money to watch lots of attractive women not actually have sex with me, but somehow suggest through roughhousing that they would if I just happened to be there.
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 1:59 PM on December 3, 2003


Not skimpy enough. Give the people what they want, dammit!
posted by rushmc at 2:03 PM on December 3, 2003


They may have finally figured out what it takes to get me interested in football. More hot chicks!
posted by adamrice at 2:13 PM on December 3, 2003


Ugh. This is sickening and pathetic and anyone who watches it is also sickening and pathetic. Okay, maybe I take these things too seriously, but there's enough sex-selling, women-as-meat bullshit out there, especially during football season, is this really necessary? Why don't they just come out and say it...women aren't good for anything but sex and titillating men.

So there you have it, my woman's lib body is up in arms. You betcha I'm writing to Dodge. This is an embarassment to the human race. Sorry, but I just don't see it as funny or something to make light of.

Imagine if that were your daughter "playing" in that game...
posted by aacheson at 2:38 PM on December 3, 2003


Why don't they just come out and say it...women aren't good for anything but sex and titillating men.

No, they're just also good at that!
posted by The God Complex at 2:43 PM on December 3, 2003


Glen Campbell doesn't seem like he's amused by this
posted by ElvisJesus at 3:10 PM on December 3, 2003


Shocking! This is a new low indeed. Pretty soon I'll bet they're going to start producing videos and pay per view content that consists of naked women engaged in overt sexual contact with each other! Oh man, that'll be the day.
Come on people, this is objectifying and panders to men's sexual wishes yes, but thats certainly nothing new.
Dodge's involvement is significant, but the event itself is just a creative twist on stuff that's been around for ages, and its certainly not the worst that has been done.
posted by Wingy at 3:22 PM on December 3, 2003


People are surprised that Dodge is sponsoring this?
posted by modofo at 3:43 PM on December 3, 2003


Come on... a new low? It's supposed to be fun/cute/titillating. It's moronic, but if someone wants to pay money to view moronic stuff, they should be allowed.

And if my daughter were doing it to get paid; or to raise money for a good cause; or because it helped her get another job, that would be okay, too.
posted by Bootcut at 3:46 PM on December 3, 2003


Lots of Australians in the lineup. I guess we know where to find the hard-drinkin', sports-playin', lingere-wearin' girls. (This comment is begging for a witty response -- is quonsar alive in this thread?)
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 4:05 PM on December 3, 2003


is quonsar alive in this thread?

He's at the doctors getting an abnormal growth in his comedic region checked out. Doctors fear he may have been exposed to too many republicans. If all goes well, though, we'll be in for some post-op anasthetic hijincks later. Unless they have to irradiate the entire region. Then it will just be the drooling monkey antics. It's a win-win.
posted by The God Complex at 4:13 PM on December 3, 2003


What's the spread in that game?
posted by reidfleming at 4:51 PM on December 3, 2003


The more I think about it, the more I think that "full-contact" should be out, and they should play "two-hand-touch, above or below the waist".

That, I would pay for.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 4:56 PM on December 3, 2003


Okay, maybe I take these things too seriously

Apparently you do. We are subjected...er, exposed...er, oh, you know what I mean!...to sexualized images of women every waking moment of every day in (almost) every part of our culture, and this is where you decide to draw the line and say it's a horrible thing?
posted by rushmc at 6:18 PM on December 3, 2003


...by having the models square off against the Arizona Cardinals.

OK, I would SO pay money to see supermodels tackled by professional linebackers. I admit it. In fact, I would probably tape it, and watch it again. In slow motion.

Cause that is comedy gold, my friends.


What's the spread in that game? - reidfleming


*whistle* *throws flag* Pun on the field...first down.
posted by dejah420 at 8:14 PM on December 3, 2003


Interestingly, it's sponsored by Dodge.

Like a rock indeed.
posted by Dagobert at 12:29 AM on December 4, 2003


[waits for some poor jackass to call dejah420 a violent woman hater]
posted by Ignatius J. Reilly at 12:30 AM on December 4, 2003


In general, I'd avoid statements like "hits a new low" because that's a pretty tough standard to meet, what with all the steep competition. I have no intention of watching the Bra Bowl, but I can't believe it's going to be any worse than Celebrity Poker.

Still, it's good to know that they're trying.
posted by anapestic at 6:06 AM on December 4, 2003


It would be better if they were naked. Or at least toplees in thongs. I'm just saying.
posted by jonmc at 9:57 AM on December 4, 2003


LT in a thong? Calling rainbaby!
posted by skyscraper at 11:55 AM on December 4, 2003


It would be better if they were naked. Or at least toplees in thongs. I'm just saying.

That would definitely be bad naked.
posted by Ignatius J. Reilly at 12:25 PM on December 4, 2003


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