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Ashlee Vanilli
October 23, 2004 11:41 PM   Subscribe

Why I love live TV. Anyone remember Elvis Costello shaking things up a bit on SNL in 1977? Succulent pop-star Ashlee Simpson did the same thing tonight only it wasn't intentional. Appears the lip synch track started before she was ready. Video also mirrored here if first one gets filtered'
posted by KevinSkomsvold (145 comments total)

 
Damn I should have stuck around after Weekend Update... Hilarious.
posted by Space Coyote at 11:46 PM on October 23, 2004


Cliff note version: After she walked off stage, the band played for a few seconds (looking mighty confused) then SNL cut to commercial and ran some crappy filler skits to fill the time. At the end of the show, she blamed her band for starting the wrong song. She should have blamed the technician who cued up the wrong lip sync track.
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 11:46 PM on October 23, 2004


pwnd.
posted by PrinceValium at 11:49 PM on October 23, 2004


Is this available as an mpeg?
posted by interrobang at 11:49 PM on October 23, 2004


Is this available as an mpeg?

Not that I can find yet. As soon as I can find a link, I'll post it for sure.
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 11:52 PM on October 23, 2004


Here is a better hi-res link (sorry, no mpeg yet).
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 11:54 PM on October 23, 2004


Slightly off-topic, but did anyone notice the girl that was supposed to sing "America the Beautiful" for the 6th or 7th game of the ACLS (baseball) was also lip-syncing? I didn't see it mentioned anywhere, but then, I didn't look very hard. It was painfully obvious and I almost felt bad for her (only 13 years old) except that she's some famous precocious country-western star, and thus deserves condemnation.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 11:58 PM on October 23, 2004


Sign of the times. Everything is fake and faith-based nowadays.
posted by skallas at 12:18 AM on October 24, 2004


call me crazy, but i thought the band looked pretty smug. glad I live on the west coast and can still catch this
posted by efalk at 12:19 AM on October 24, 2004


So funny.

Sky Captain: "Ladies and gentlemen, what can I say live tv."
Ashlee: "Exactly, I feel so bad my band started playing the wrong song and I had no excuse so I thought I'd do a ho-down. I'm sorry, live tv, things happen."
posted by bobo123 at 12:21 AM on October 24, 2004


Apparently the girl who sang for the Sox/Yanks game was also named Ashley -- Ashley Gearing. Two data points that conclusively show girls named Ashley can't sing on their own.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 12:42 AM on October 24, 2004


A pop star lip syncs. Ummm... duh? I can't stand her music, but it's not like I hate her and thinks she deserves to be embarrased like that. Unless this video ends with yet another assist from the coach of the Portland Blazers, I don't really find some girl fucking up singing on live television that entertaining. If anything I feel bad for her.
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 12:52 AM on October 24, 2004


Reminds me of the Worst. Concert. Ever.

They Might Be Giants, Charlottesville, 1991 +/- 1.

They didn't have their band yet, so John and John were playing along with master-tapes of the other tracks. Which already sort of sucked, but I could live with that. But then halfway through one song, they stopped because it was only then they realized that it was the wrong tape. Gah.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 12:57 AM on October 24, 2004


Apparently they edited for the west coast.

Her Official Website Forums are currently hilarious.
posted by futureproof at 1:01 AM on October 24, 2004


Everything is fake and faith-based nowadays.

You are such a cockface.
posted by Steve_at_Linnwood at 1:05 AM on October 24, 2004


I just saw it in Seattle, so I don't know if they cut it out in other markets or what. Heh.
posted by astruc at 1:06 AM on October 24, 2004


You can try here, but I didn't name it, I just found it...

Ashlee MPG

(A bit slow to boot. Patience can be a virtue, I suppose...)
posted by Samizdata at 1:10 AM on October 24, 2004


huh steve?
posted by Kwantsar at 1:13 AM on October 24, 2004


I just caught the end of the performance (am in Alaska) and they must have edited it because she finished the whole song.
Same awful pants, though.
posted by rhapsodie at 1:14 AM on October 24, 2004


Well, after WAY too long a period of involuntary exposure thanks to a wife addicted to Seventh Heaven (although I do still plan to keep her), I must admit the dark brown hair definitely blunted any physical appeal she had for me. Struck me as a bit, erm, well, trailer trash, combined with her radical shift in wardrobe.

That was about the limit of her appeal for me frankly...
posted by Samizdata at 1:24 AM on October 24, 2004


Wait: the pants were different.
Still bad, though.
posted by rhapsodie at 1:46 AM on October 24, 2004


From Lucky Magazine interview:

LM: What are your takes on lip-synching?

AS: I'm totally against it and offended by it. I'm going out to let my real talent show, not to just stand there and dance around. Personally, I'd never lip-synch. It's just not me.
posted by luckyclone at 1:53 AM on October 24, 2004


A real pro too, walking off instead of utilizing an ounce of talent to turn it around.
Maybe it's time to stop enabling pop-kiddies and take away their Mr. Microphones.
posted by HTuttle at 1:58 AM on October 24, 2004


Nothing's new under the sun. Nick Heyward, of Haircut 100, once famously gurned at the camera all the way through the intro of on of their tunes on BBC1's Top Of The Pops sometime in the 80s. Sadly, he continued to smile blandly at the camera as the vocal track started - the studio monitors weren't working and he couldn't hear that the song had "started"...
posted by benzo8 at 2:00 AM on October 24, 2004


I remember when SNL had a rule about forbidding lip-syncing, all through the 80s and into the early 90s, back when they used to be a place where you'd find emerging bands in music that didn't have a popular outlet otherwise. Sometime in the mid-90s that seemed to change and I've kind of written off SNL since, at least in terms of recognizing and promoting the essence of good music.
posted by mathowie at 2:05 AM on October 24, 2004


anyone who defends her is a moral and aesthetic coward.
posted by luckyclone at 2:12 AM on October 24, 2004


But not a cock face.
posted by interrobang at 2:16 AM on October 24, 2004


of course not. we are all gentlemen.
posted by luckyclone at 2:32 AM on October 24, 2004


Dang. I watched the whole show (EC version) and it didn't even register on me. Had to read about it later. Then again, these manufactured singers could perform naked while juggling flaming chainsaws and I might not notice.
posted by RavinDave at 2:35 AM on October 24, 2004


Being on slowslow dialup, I still have not watched the entire thing, but here's what I saw so far, and I think it's actually a pretty interesting media event.

The band doesn't look smug; they look like they're hired to back up this girl and don't particularly care about her, since they're all hired guns.

The music starts "prematurely", and Ashlee starts dancing. I disagree with the above posters who say that there's something wrong with her pants, because they look fine to me. Granted, Ashlee has bangs, which I'm a sucker for, and my brain has already fallen out at this point because Ashlee has poked her hipbone in my direction.

Anyway, once Ashlee realizes that something's wrong, she kind of stops. Then the music starts again because the musicians--professional session-guys all, in spite of the indie-rock clothes--start actually playing the song because someone has suddenly actually turned the sound on for their instruments.

Ashlee starts to do a little unchoreographed jig to the music, and it looks ridiculous, and and she realizes it.

Then she gets this shit-eating grin on her face that is intended to hide that she knows that this little episode is going to end up on a VH1 show about famous musical fuckups. Not knowing what to do, she leaves the stage. She's only, like, nineteen, after all. The band, knowing that they really can play those instruments, continues to play the song.

'Cause shit, those guys might look like "what the fuck do we care" indie rockers, but really they know that their jobs and future are on the line because of this. They know that this event is going to be famous; it's in their best interest to ride it out in a professional manner.
posted by interrobang at 2:44 AM on October 24, 2004


Here's someone's take from the ashlee simpsons boards, which are currently a troll's paradise. Sounds legit to me.
posted by mathowie at 2:54 AM on October 24, 2004


maybe snl should book actual musical guests.

you know, people who can sing and play and dance and stuff.

maybe theyre afraid of things like what elvis costello did, as you mentioned, being completely punk rock by playing a different song *gasp*.

but isnt that what live tv is supposed to be about? isnt that what this counterculture cutting edge tv show supposed to be about?

tom waits was on letterman a few weeks back and pretty much kicked ass all over the place. it looks like he could have played tonight if he had been asked.

instead snl decided to help ashlee move a few more units?

enablers!
posted by tsarfan at 2:55 AM on October 24, 2004


Her sister has teh hot anyway.
posted by owillis at 3:27 AM on October 24, 2004


I was watching it live, it really was something hilarious to watch because I was so confused at first and then it dawned on me what had happened and watching her reaction... priceless.
posted by BackwardsHatClub at 3:33 AM on October 24, 2004


Failed lip synching on national TV+ You are such a cockface on Metafilter.

There is an expression in Spanish, qué vergüenza ajena, that signifies when you feel embarassed for somebody...
posted by sic at 4:04 AM on October 24, 2004


I'm guessing this is somehow going to turn into an election issue.

"Read my lips." Indeed.

Shame on Ashlee for walking off, then blaming the band for being out of synch with her recorded vocals.

Shame on SNL for booking such tripe in the first place, but also aiding and abetting in what amounts to fraud.

I hope this wakes some people up, but your average fan will find a way to support her. Shame on those who defend vile music that pollutes the airwaves.
posted by Mach3avelli at 4:43 AM on October 24, 2004


You're expecting too much of SNL. To them music is just an entertaining noise to be made while a pretty girl jumps around, nothing more. Frankly, that's OK by me, I feel much the same way about music myself. I neither understand nor care about the minute differences in "authenticity", or whether or not something is "mainstream" or "alternative" and how one goes about telling the difference. Some songs (if song is even the right term, 'cos a lot don't even have lyrics as such) I like, some I don't. What does it actually matter if the dancer sings it at the time, or even if the dancer is the same as the singer? The question is, did you enjoy the show?

If the music industry was to have any gravitas at all, it would need to pay more attention to the composers/songwriters, who are the actual creators of the work on show, rather than the pretty blonde who belts it out into the input microphone for the voice-smoothing software. Come to think of it, maybe that's what music nerds mean by "authenticity". Which I'm not convinced makes for more enjoyable music.
posted by aeschenkarnos at 5:17 AM on October 24, 2004


S@L: You are such a cockface.

For using "faith-based" as a derogatory term? Huh. Sign me up as an "evidence-based" thinker with the other cockfaces then, thanks.

And as we all know, the evidence indicates that your Dear Leader is a lip-syncher too, of sorts. Neener neener.
posted by aeschenkarnos at 5:25 AM on October 24, 2004


Darn, I knew I should have kept watching after the "Ghost of Babe Ruth" part.

Someone mentioned Bush, who is equal to Hitler. Thread has ended. Nicely trolled, skallas.
posted by brownpau at 6:14 AM on October 24, 2004


If anything I feel bad for her.

I find this impossible. I also turned it off after the weekend update. Nuts. Too funny, that dance move.

The band's probably seen this a dozen times already, and her being quick to blame them is a nice sign of her disposition. I'd smile too if I were on live national TV and playing my song, and the singer just freaked out and left you there.

Maybe I would've moved a little more.
Hell, even gotten on the mike.
Play some Dead Kennedys, even.

Hilarious, thanks for posting.

Does this mean she's going to list herself as an Actress/Singer now, rather than the opposite order?
posted by Busithoth at 6:20 AM on October 24, 2004


The Simpson parents only had money for one nose job?
posted by password at 6:28 AM on October 24, 2004


And as we all know, the evidence indicates that your Dear Leader is a lip-syncher too, of sorts.

Well, there was plenty of hear-say and conjecture; and those are kinds of evidence.

In what way is this amusing bit of schadenfreude an example of something that is "faith-based"?
posted by ed\26h at 6:30 AM on October 24, 2004


Darn, I knew I should have kept watching after the "Ghost of Babe Ruth" part.

It makes me cringe to think about how awful that skit must be. That's why I don't watch Saturday Night Live-- I feel embarassed for the people who have to go on television and try and get laughs out of:

1. sex jokes tame enough for broadcast TV.

2. Pop culture references that will dated by the time the show is re-run this season.

3. Political jokes that won't offend anyone.

4. Recurring characters milked out of any humor they might have had by using them until you hate them.

The clip in question is just about the funniest thing I've seen on SNL since the "Old Glory Robot Insurance".
posted by Mayor Curley at 6:35 AM on October 24, 2004


She may actually think that the band did in fact "start the wrong song." Based on my experience, singers like her tend not to understand where the noise underneath them comes from. It seems to me that mathowie's link has it nailed, along with interobang's description of the band's motivations.

I like how the guitar player and singer are looking at the drummer from the first beat of the tape, as though he's playing the wrong song. Sure, maybe. But then she starts singing without using her mouth. Hard for him to do that.

The cymbal crash from the drummer is him stating, "OK, we'll play with the tape."

The right thing to do is go with the prerecorded track and ride it out to the end. That's what the band was doing. The damage was already done, of course. Just don't make it worse.

The wrong thing to do is confirm your defeat by dancing like a jackass then leaving the stage. "girl you know its girl you know its girl you know its...."

Remember kids: The band will always try to save you.
posted by jmcmurry at 6:57 AM on October 24, 2004


Darn. An alternate theory came to mind just as I hit "Post":

Maybe it's the drummer's job to play the tape, and he cued the wrong track.

This would explain why:

-- the tape didn't stop (he was busy drumming)
-- the guitar player is giving him the evil eye from beat 1
-- the bass player is looking at the stage left guitar player like something is really wrong
-- she thinks the band started the wrong song

...and the cymbal crash is the drummer stating "OK, I am fired."

Remember kids: don't trust the drummer.
posted by jmcmurry at 7:03 AM on October 24, 2004


I watched the whole show last night, and during her first song, I was thinking, "Oh, she's not even a dancer and she's singing to a track." Look, I know pop stars do it all the time, but I respect it a little more when they record something that's even a tiny little bit different than what's on the radio.
posted by ferociouskitty at 7:09 AM on October 24, 2004


Everything is fake and faith-based nowadays.

Well, most everything, but I think people's petty viciousness and schadenfreude (on broad display in this thread) are quite real, alas.
posted by rushmc at 7:53 AM on October 24, 2004


aeschenkarnos ... i don't think it's too much to ask that a singer actually sing in front of a live audience to give an "authentic" performance ... before tv and modern recordings came along, they didn't have much choice, did they?

call her a dancer, entertainer, or an actress when she's lip-synching ... but don't call her a musician until she actually sings
posted by pyramid termite at 8:13 AM on October 24, 2004


Wow, that was awesome! First funny thing on SNL in years.

You have to give the band credit; they were doing their job. Not only can she not lipsync right, what the hell was that little boppy dancing crud? Why don't they just put real robots on stage? That'd be more interesting than these meat puppets.
posted by Nelson at 8:25 AM on October 24, 2004


"Well, most everything, but I think people's petty viciousness and schadenfreude (on broad display in this thread) are quite real, alas."

Petty, my ass.

Her lipsyncing just threw out my excuse for so many artists' bad performances on SNL. Since they redesigned their set, it's been improved, but there have been some horribly ugly sets done there (I always thought it was notorious for having bad sound for performers)
posted by Busithoth at 8:35 AM on October 24, 2004


Cockfaces aside, I remember SNL used to at least have some memorable performances (Living Color and Captain Beefheart come to mind) and if I'm not mistaken, they used to take some pride in presenting live music. Didn't they have a thing about bands not lip-synching? Guess thats not the case.
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 8:35 AM on October 24, 2004


I don't buy the idea that making fun of her is petty, or that we should feel bad for her. I'd bet good money she is laughing about it herself. Everyone already knows she lipsyncs. She knows she lipsyncs. Her fans aren't going to suddenly abandon her. I mean, if you're looking for artistry and musical integrity, are you really listening to Ashlee Simpson? It's pop.
posted by Doug at 9:05 AM on October 24, 2004


Contemporary Insanity Audio/Video Zone has a couple vids of it. They even have a remix that is better than the originals.
posted by Trik at 9:06 AM on October 24, 2004


SNL used to have real talent. Too bad it's all about the money now.

This girl deserves what she gets. She's been given every break in the world, and manufactured into a superstar because of her looks and last name. I can't muster any sympathy for her. She's a great example of what music's come to.
posted by xammerboy at 9:10 AM on October 24, 2004


That remix is awesome. I almost shot coffee all over my screen. The musical choice is perfect. (I won't spoil it, watch the vid.)
posted by AstroGuy at 9:18 AM on October 24, 2004


I just watched the video.

It looks like what she said happened happened. The band started off on the "wrong" tune, and then when the vocals kicked in everyone was lost. Ashlee had no choice but to walk off stage, because her mic wasn't turned on and her little dance was not working.

The faith based comment btw, is related to the Simpson's marketing themselves as Christian rock. It was a joke, a JOKE. Just this cockface's opinion.
posted by xammerboy at 9:52 AM on October 24, 2004


On the one hand, yes, I am sorry that this young woman embarrassed herself on national TV (though blaming her band was lame).

On the other hand, I am glad that the emptiness of the current "celebrity culture" of the music industry, in which pre-packaged "stars" are foisted on the public regardless of whether or not they possess any actual talent, ability, or dedication to their art, was exposed on national TV.

There are lots of really, really talented people in the United States--let alone the rest of the world--who write their own songs, play their own instruments, and sing really well.

The younger Ms. Simpson may be a lovely person, but the fact is that she has been packaged and propelled into a space she is not prepared to occupy. It would be great if she learned something from this experience that would inspire her to become a better performer and musician.
posted by Sidhedevil at 9:53 AM on October 24, 2004


SNL is John Belushi, simple as that
posted by matteo at 9:55 AM on October 24, 2004


Somehow, I've done something screwy to my media players, I can get the sound from the links, but no video...I dunno what I've done.
posted by dejah420 at 10:03 AM on October 24, 2004


You know, I'm laughing at the situation and responses, but I can't get myself to watch the video. I've been in similar situations -- I did a community production of Into the Woods a while back, and the music was all midi-based. Somehow the key for the first few songs got altered, and the entire first ten minutes of the show sounded like, I don't know, like burning. You just sing and keep going. The musicians can screw up too.

Then again, I also told a corporate audience of 2000 people to get off their lazy asses cause they wouldn't get up and dance. Listed under "most embarrassing moment."
posted by o2b at 10:08 AM on October 24, 2004


dejah: you probably don't have the correct codec installed.
Download and install the Gordian Knot codec pack.
It contains the most comonly used AVI codecs.
posted by Trik at 10:14 AM on October 24, 2004


SNL is John Belushi, simple as that

I love Belushi, but give Akroyd a little credit. Before he became a hack, he wrote some of the best sketches. And don't forget Gilda Radner.
posted by jonmc at 10:15 AM on October 24, 2004


She's a great example of what music's come to.

no, she's not. she is a great example of what unfettered monopolistic capitalism has come to in relation to music. people who can't tell the difference scare the fuck out of me.
posted by quonsar at 10:20 AM on October 24, 2004


Heh, or another way of handling it. I remember Hole (yes, a Courtney Love anecdote) on MTV unplugged in which they tried to cover Duran Duran's "Hungry Like a Wolf," after a first verse that was absolutely wretched, the band just sort of stopped, Love said something like, "well that was shit" laughed it off and went into their next number.
posted by KirkJobSluder at 10:27 AM on October 24, 2004


I don't really find some girl fucking up singing on live television that entertaining.

it wasn't live and she wasn't singing. that's the point.
posted by quonsar at 10:30 AM on October 24, 2004


Kevin, you say that at the end of the show she blamed her band? What did she say? Were they there on stage with her?
posted by iconomy at 10:38 AM on October 24, 2004


If she'd just have said *oops* and smiled instead of blaming the band, everyone would probably have just laughed it off with her.

Now she just looks bad
posted by Trik at 10:39 AM on October 24, 2004


It was sad. At least the backup band tried to salvage it tho--they get credit (and they were just as amused as us viewers).

I think more recently (post Elvis) they've been scared of musicians since Sinead's anti-Pope thing--lots of acts have been lip-syncing on SNL in the past few years, and it didn't used to seem that way. They've been booking more bubblegum acts than they used to, too.
posted by amberglow at 10:40 AM on October 24, 2004


Kevin, you say that at the end of the show she blamed her band? What did she say? Were they there on stage with her?

Go to this page and look for the "Ashley Blames Her Band" avi. I couldn't see any of the band members on stage with her. Talk about some flop-sweat.
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 10:44 AM on October 24, 2004


Ouch, that's gotta hurt, Ashlee. It would've been awesome if she had just yelled "DO OVERS!!" at the top of her lungs and they had started right up again. It might almost have been cute. Instead - total shamefulness.
posted by tristeza at 10:49 AM on October 24, 2004


> Maybe it's the drummer's job to play the tape, and he cued the wrong track.

How can you tell when a drummer's at the door? The knocking speeds up. How can you tell when a drummer's at the door? He doesn't know when to come in. How is a drum solo like a sneeze? You can tell it's coming, but you can't do anything about it.
posted by jfuller at 10:58 AM on October 24, 2004


The band, to their credit, tried to pick up the dropped ball and run with it. It was AS who didn't even take a stab at singing the song. If her mic was off, why where their instruments on? It think she bailed out of fear. She should have bailed out of embarassment for that "dance" she was trying to do.

Two words: talentless hack.

I'm with jmcmurry. Since the drummer, even in a lip-sync gig like this, has to play along quiety, it's probably his job to kick off the backing track. Something wasn't cued up right, and the vocals started before AS thought they would. If it was the wrong song, it didn't register on her until the vocals started. But the guitarist looks like he knew something was off.
posted by wheat at 10:58 AM on October 24, 2004


Just a quick public service announcement:

Samizdata's link
currently goes to a goatse video.

That is all.
posted by Ljubljana at 11:31 AM on October 24, 2004


OK, just so y'all know — Samizdata's "Ashlee MPG" is NSFW goatsesque stuff from Stile project.

I can't watch this because all of the linked videos are down... does anyone know where it's still available?
posted by Zurishaddai at 11:35 AM on October 24, 2004


Zurishaddai:
The videos on the page link I provided still work...
posted by Trik at 11:41 AM on October 24, 2004


taumeson--thanks for the inside dope! Once again I'm awed: behold the power of the internet.
posted by Turtles all the way down at 11:47 AM on October 24, 2004


Hey jfuller, what's the difference between a drum machine and a drummer? You only have to punch the information into the drum machine once!

Last night (right around the time Ashlee was clogging, actually), I saw Joanna Newsom play last night, just her harp and her voice, and she's also what modern music's come to -- the brilliantly gifted playing small shows at $7 per head (and that's sharing a bill with 3 other good bands, yet). An injustice to her, but a reprieve from unfettered capitalism for the rest of us: for that price, I should have been watching teenage karaoke with the rest of the SNL audience. The next time you feel blue about the state of modern music, remember what Sidhedevil said:

There are lots of really, really talented people in the United States--let alone the rest of the world--who write their own songs, play their own instruments, and sing really well.

So go to your local clubs and record stores and support them!

(And heartfelt thanks to Quartermass for the linked thread that lead me to Ms. Newsom's music, and then all these months later out the door to see her. He and dobbs have both left some fine trails leading to where the good modern music is, and they deserve extra shiny gold stars for it.)
posted by melissa may at 11:57 AM on October 24, 2004


The idea that SNL is "afraid" of musicians seems awfully naive, in an "OH MY GOD!!! rock and roll is the most important thing EVARRR!" way. I really doubt that Lorne Michaels or the powers that be particularly care whether or not the performers are true punks out to stick it to The Man or soulless sellouts straight from the bowels of Big Music Hell.

It defies all logic. Barring cuss-words in the lyrics, why would NBC care what song they play? They have no stake in promoting the artist. Why would they give a damn one way or another about helping Capitol Records, or any other company that isn't NBC or owned by the same people, make a bigger profit? Why would Lorne Michaels or NBC give the slightest damn if Elvis Costello wants to slag his own industry? It doesn't pick their pocket or break their leg.

At most, they might prefer for the musical act to help rev up the audience for the next skit.

I'm sure the only things they're "afraid" of are of someone on the show cussing on live tv, or of a musical act taking substantially more or less time than they've planned for. If SNL ended up being pissed at Costello, I'd bet a nice meal that it's because he went long, they had to cut a skit, and then had to shuffle other things around that cut.

And that was still better than the time that Faith No More were on and the lead singer was so drunk / stoned he was falling over the equipment and climbing the walls. Not to mention the time that the Spin Doctors were on after their singer finally had enough money to really explore being on smack -- if you're gonna get wasted, at least have the decency to pick drugs that are performance-enhancing, dammit.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 12:05 PM on October 24, 2004


Ashlee Simpson will be undeservedly rich & celebritous her whole life, while this talented lady will probably wallow in semi-obscurity til she's eventually forced into some desk job with a barely-there retirement plan. Not fair.
posted by dhoyt at 12:09 PM on October 24, 2004


Well, my favorite performance on SNL was FEAR, though I can't find a good link. They smashed the place up, and made Belushi unable to really bring in another musical guest. At least without vetting them first.
posted by Busithoth at 12:16 PM on October 24, 2004


How can you tell when a drummer's at the door? The knocking speeds up. How can you tell when a drummer's at the door? He doesn't know when to come in. How is a drum solo like a sneeze? You can tell it's coming, but you can't do anything about it.

You are such a cockface.
posted by Evstar at 12:29 PM on October 24, 2004


Everyone's assuming that the playing of the wrong lipsync tape at the wrong time was a malfunction. A mistake. But what if you were some crew drone at SNL? And some obnoxious pretty girl who had no talent kept giving you a hard time all week, couldn't get it right in rehearsal How careful would you be to press the right button at the right time? Wouldn't it be funny if you made a mistake on live TV?
posted by Nelson at 12:31 PM on October 24, 2004


The jig is up.

That Kaki King video dhoyt linked to is sweet.

What do you call a guy that hangs out with musicians?
A drummer.
posted by euphorb at 12:33 PM on October 24, 2004


How can you tell the stage is level?

The drummer drools from both sides of his mouth.
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 12:47 PM on October 24, 2004


note to self: when in the middle of a potentially career threatening mistake do not do the ho-down dance.
posted by concreteforest at 1:08 PM on October 24, 2004


What do you call a drummer who just broke up with his girlfriend? Homeless.
posted by cell divide at 1:14 PM on October 24, 2004


How do you get a drummer off your porch?

You pay for your pizza.
posted by jonmc at 1:24 PM on October 24, 2004


don't call her a musician until she actually sings

A musician makes music; a singer sings. One is not inherently better than the other.

And I bought a Kaki King CD a year ago.
posted by rushmc at 1:32 PM on October 24, 2004


Joanna Newsom is shite. I am fully prepared to rant about this. She does play some nice melodies on her harp, but: shite. (As for what the Incredible String Band has been reduced to, ah, don't ask.)
posted by kenko at 2:09 PM on October 24, 2004


Ahhh good times, good times. I particularly enjoyed the inside track knowledge about Britney Spears while we were at it. Thanks all.

I <3 Metafilter.
posted by Hildegarde at 2:32 PM on October 24, 2004


Please do rant about Joanna

So I can think lesser of you
posted by cinderful at 2:38 PM on October 24, 2004


The noise that you enjoy hearing is crap.
posted by bargle at 2:50 PM on October 24, 2004


Wow.
Kaki.
Cool.
Thanks
posted by Outlawyr at 3:14 PM on October 24, 2004


Metafilter: I am fully prepared to rant about this.
posted by Busithoth at 3:53 PM on October 24, 2004


Wow.
Kaki.
Cool.
Thanks


X2
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 4:10 PM on October 24, 2004


In the end, it's going to come out that Ashton Kutcher snuck into the control room, and this was all a lead in to the next series of Punk'd. It's hard for us to think like them, because they are from hollywood and therefor smarter than us.
posted by drezdn at 4:15 PM on October 24, 2004


I remeber hearing, twenty years ago, the the music segments were the only thing that wasn't live on SNL. They were taped earlier in the evening, 'cause so much can go wrong. So, as I watched this, I was a bit shocked at the screw up, not that she was lip synching, which is par for the course with pop these days, but that it was actually live.
posted by bendybendy at 5:38 PM on October 24, 2004


I'd just like to third (fourth? fifth?) the amazingness of that Kaki King clip. And the Tom Waits one.

As for Ashlee Simpson, well, her sister comes off looking just as idiotic on her reality show, I'm sure she'll be fine.
posted by arto at 6:01 PM on October 24, 2004


I like Ashlee's nose.
posted by interrobang at 6:14 PM on October 24, 2004


Trik, thanks! I'll give that a shot. :)
posted by dejah420 at 6:34 PM on October 24, 2004


Just so everyone knows, that Kaki King link is to a VERY not safe for work clip from a japanese porno.
posted by crank at 6:41 PM on October 24, 2004


Download and install the Gordian Knot codec pack.

I recommend the Defiler pack instead, since it uses the ass-kicking ffdshow, which will show you mercy if you have an older PC.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 6:59 PM on October 24, 2004


Who is Ashlee Simpson, he inquires, having absolutely no idea why she has any name recognition whatsoever. Is she a child of OJ Simpson, or a child of some other famous person?
posted by five fresh fish at 7:26 PM on October 24, 2004


Also, the vid is on bittorrent: http://bimonscificon.mybttracker.net:6969/
posted by five fresh fish at 7:28 PM on October 24, 2004


Videos
posted by terrortubby at 7:28 PM on October 24, 2004



Who is Ashlee Simpson, he inquires, having absolutely no idea why she has any name recognition whatsoever. Is she a child of OJ Simpson, or a child of some other famous person?


Ashlee Simpson is a complete media-construct who is the younger sister of slightly less-obvious media-construct Jessica Simpson.

The difference between them is that Ashlee Simpson's rise to fame was designed and constructed and documented in an extremely postmodern "reality television" show by MTV, and by a none-too-subtle media-saturation buildup of having Ashlee appear with her sister on commercials for pizza and breathmints.

Other than that, I don't know who she is, either.
posted by interrobang at 7:37 PM on October 24, 2004


Now a wire story (calling it probably a "guide vocal").
posted by Zurishaddai at 7:42 PM on October 24, 2004


Oi! Sorry about the video link changing!
posted by Samizdata at 7:46 PM on October 24, 2004


crank, what kind of Kaki King links have you been clicking?
posted by punishinglemur at 7:52 PM on October 24, 2004


> The faith based comment btw, is related to the Simpson's marketing themselves as Christian rock.

Implied: skallas listens to Christian rock. </cockface.>
posted by brownpau at 8:27 PM on October 24, 2004


Man, they really need to spoof this next week on SNL. Eminem's on next week, he'd probably poke fun at her.
posted by 23skidoo at 8:48 PM on October 24, 2004


Ouch. Finally saw the video and, as someone who has seriously fucked up performing in public, it brings on a strange tingling sensation which I don't care to feel again.

*enrolls aeschenkarnos in a philosophy of aesthetics course*
posted by Dick Paris at 9:07 PM on October 24, 2004


ROU_Xenophobe, I was at that TMBG concert to which you refer. (Oddly. Trax is (was) a small venue in a small town.) I was 13 years old, though, and basking in the glory of their TMBGness, so I was totally oblivious to the very concept that they could do any wrong. I'm sure I thought it was altogether intentional.
posted by waldo at 10:10 PM on October 24, 2004


Gordian Knot is the codec pack of choice of doom9 and contains the latest build of ffdshow. Along with DivX3.11alpha, DivX5.12 Pro, XviD Koepi 1.0.2, Huffyuv 0.2.2.1, AC3Filter 0.70b, mpgaudioax, and Morgan Stream Switcher.
posted by Trik at 10:20 PM on October 24, 2004


Metafilter: Your RDA of drummer jokes and faith-based cockfaces?
posted by Samizdata at 10:47 PM on October 24, 2004


Homer Simpson would have have done much better in dealing with this.
posted by juiceCake at 11:28 PM on October 24, 2004


This girl deserves what she gets. She's been given every break in the world, and manufactured into a superstar because of her looks and last name. I can't muster any sympathy for her.

So, you believe that it's reasonable to think that someone can deserve misfortune due to the circumstances in which they find themselves?
posted by ed\26h at 2:57 AM on October 25, 2004


She's already been CafePressized.
posted by Vidiot at 3:13 AM on October 25, 2004


How come the video links keep changing to rude things? How does this come about?

One of those 'I just clicked on the link, I didn't know what it was going to be' moments that we all love.
posted by asok at 4:20 AM on October 25, 2004


The Kaki link worked for me. übercool.
posted by dabitch at 4:22 AM on October 25, 2004



So, you believe that it's reasonable to think that someone can deserve misfortune due to the circumstances in which they find themselves?


Ed/26h are you channeling Martin Bryce or something?

Your utter refusal to be anything other than an even-handed, reasonable, "see-all sides" Devil's Advocate is a new kind of trolling isn't it.

Cockface!
posted by fullerine at 6:03 AM on October 25, 2004


Just to help the Kaki challenged, the link http://www.sonymusic.com/artists/KakiKing/video/KakiKing_PlayingWithPinkNoiseVidFull_300.asx is not porn. See how it says sonymusic?

As for this Ass Simpson chick, the most embarrising part is that "I'm too sexy for my microphone"dance she does at the beginning before she first realizes something is messed up. My free advice to her:
1. Learn to sing
2. Learn to dance
3. Learn to roll with the punches
4. Do NOT blame others, it always looks bad, even if it's true.
posted by Outlawyr at 7:04 AM on October 25, 2004


ironic
posted by dhoyt at 7:11 AM on October 25, 2004


What's with her skin in that ironic picture, it's like she's been deep fried.
posted by drezdn at 7:53 AM on October 25, 2004


Fullerine: I'm not too sure how to take that.
posted by ed\26h at 8:33 AM on October 25, 2004


And now I'm forced to ask Who T.F. is Jessica Simpson? Some sort of Paris Hilton clone, getting by on her daddy's megabucks and cheezy self-promoing porn videos? A female Hanson or Backstreet Boys or [insert cheezy-assed pre-assembled talentless hack kiddyband]? Someone who slept their way to the top?

I'magonna need to get MTV, aren't I?
posted by five fresh fish at 8:58 AM on October 25, 2004


Jessica Simpson: ditzy blond, just did a bad remake of "Take My Breath Away", had a MTV show with hubby Nick somethingorother from 98 Degrees (a forgettable boyband) called Newlyweds, thought buffalo wings came from buffalos, does lots of commercials...
posted by amberglow at 9:04 AM on October 25, 2004


It has become entirely too easy to get 15 minutes of fame in the USA, hasn't it?
posted by five fresh fish at 9:28 AM on October 25, 2004


How come the video links keep changing to rude things? How does this come about?

Webmasters notice a particular video being deep linked and download from foriegn sites and so change the content of the link to something that both sends a message about playing nice and consumes less bandwidth.
posted by Mitheral at 9:33 AM on October 25, 2004


schadenfreude

It's really about how badly SNL has sucked for so many years. All those crappy absurdly un-funny recurring characters, all those 10 minute sketches that ran 9 minutes too long, all those crappy, lip-synching musical guests just wear you down after a while. Bright spots like Alec Baldwin's "Schwetty Balls" sketch, or Queen Latifah actually singing (imagine that!) don't make up for many, many years of polymorphous suckery. And as schadenfreude goes, this is all pretty tame.

And the cult of John Belushi really has to go get a new god or just worship someplace else. I mean that with all due respect -- he was good, yeh, even great, but move on, guys. Does anyone really believe that the last several years of the "original" case were truly better than either the Guest/Crystal/Shearer "Super-Season" or the cast that followed, with Robert Downey Jr, Randy the Q, the peculiarly toothsome Joan Cusack, and Dennis Miller back before he fell under the delusion that he was smart?
posted by lodurr at 10:37 AM on October 25, 2004


or the cast that followed, with Robert Downey Jr, Randy the Q, the peculiarly toothsome Joan Cusack, and Dennis Miller back before he fell under the delusion that he was smart?

Good cast, horrible sketches, apart from the stuff that Terry Sweeney and Danitra Vance (RIP) wrote themselves.
posted by PinkStainlessTail at 10:47 AM on October 25, 2004


If SNL ended up being pissed at Costello, I'd bet a nice meal that it's because he went long, they had to cut a skit, and then had to shuffle other things around that cut.

I read an interview with Elvis back in '82 or so -- I think it was in Rolling Stone -- where he basically said the switch was a stupid, unprofessional thing to do, that Lorne Michaels was right to be mad at him for it, and that he did it because at that time he was a drunken ass most of the time. I don't recall him saying that it caused any rescheduling, but the songs do have different run lengths, and hey, in TV, time really truly is money, after all.

Elvise passed it off at the time as a "political" issue -- I don't remember what he was supposed to play, but he played "Radio Radio", instead, and put out that it was some kind of commentary on the American Media Machine. Which it may well have been -- that doesn't mean he wasn't also being a drunken, un-professional ass. As I recall the interview, he basically was saying that he was just so full of himself at the time that he thought a "political statement" like that was more important than behaving professionally.

Aside: In the mid-'80s, a friend played a bootleg for me of some early sessions, prior to Lowe sending him out to perform live as "Elvis Costello". One of the tunes on that bootleg was unmistakably "Radio Radio" except... that wasn't the refrain, and the lyrics were different. The refrain was "Radio soul", and it was about listening to R&B on the radio.... Any Elvis fan knows R&B is very close to his heart (despite the infamous Bramlett incident from the SNL-cock-up era). I maintained at the time, and still would, that switching one set of not very opportune lyrics (happy stuff about being inspired by music) for a more markteble set (angry stuff about the decline in British radio), while arguably disingenuous, was not necessarily dishonest: Both could be true. To my knowledge, Elvis hasn't offered up anything on the matter.
posted by lodurr at 10:57 AM on October 25, 2004


... horrible sketches ...

Oh, come on, those Robert Downey / Randy Quade bits were priceless! (Especially the Sports Illustrated commercial with Quade as a gay-dom Lyle Alzado.)
posted by lodurr at 11:03 AM on October 25, 2004


Followup: Yes, Danitra Vance was pretty damn fantastic. If "comedy" were about justice, she'd be huge, now, instead of dead.
posted by lodurr at 11:06 AM on October 25, 2004


... horrible sketches ...

Yes, but is there anyone who can doubt the genius of Short as Ed Grimley?
posted by grateful at 12:03 PM on October 25, 2004


Lodurr: "polymorphous suckery"

Good one that.
posted by Skygazer at 12:04 PM on October 25, 2004


ironic

And also fake.
posted by yupislyr at 12:12 PM on October 25, 2004


Does anyone think she's cute?

Me neither.
posted by hoborg at 7:11 PM on October 25, 2004


I do.
posted by interrobang at 10:10 PM on October 25, 2004


hoborg: You didn't give anyone a chance to answer.
posted by ed\26h at 1:22 AM on October 26, 2004


I'll answer then. No, I don't. And her dancing is awful.
posted by dabitch at 2:00 AM on October 26, 2004


Fullerine: I'm not too sure how to take that.

Man, I was in a bad mood yesterday.

Take it like I was a mean drunk with weasely George Bush eyes.

(Ignore it basically, sorry dude)
posted by fullerine at 2:08 AM on October 26, 2004


THE TRUTH IS OUT!!!

Acid Reflux is to blame.
posted by Otis at 8:00 AM on October 26, 2004


Does anyone really believe that the last several years of the "original" case were truly better than either the Guest/Crystal/Shearer "Super-Season" or the cast that followed, with Robert Downey Jr, Randy the Q, the peculiarly toothsome Joan Cusack, and Dennis Miller back before he fell under the delusion that he was smart?

Yes. The originals (Belushi/Akroyd/Morris/Newman/Radner/Curtin/Murray/Chase etc) were funnier than any cast after them. Eddie Murphy was the only later cast member who even came close. Miller was funny for a while. But Mike Myers is merely annoying and Adam Sandler had exactly two funny ideas in his head (cajun man and the chanukah song). The show now offically blows and needs to be put out of it's misery.
posted by jonmc at 8:36 AM on October 26, 2004


Apparently (I can't seem to get through), Ashlee has apologized for Ashleegate on her official website diary. Did anyone get to read it before they blocked it?
posted by naxosaxur at 10:36 AM on October 27, 2004


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