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Monkeys and Robots
February 2, 2005 6:20 AM   Subscribe

Sure, monkeys are willing to pay for pr0n, but will the robots?
posted by mcgraw (20 comments total)

 
here we go again.
posted by terrapin at 6:44 AM on February 2, 2005


Monkey Versus Robot. Ninja Vs Pirate.
posted by seanyboy at 6:51 AM on February 2, 2005



"Oh yeah, you're a bad girl, aren't you..."
posted by brownpau at 6:55 AM on February 2, 2005


Why does the combination of any two of {monkey, robot, pirate, ninja} always amuse a nerd?
posted by rxrfrx at 6:56 AM on February 2, 2005


also laser beams.
posted by Turtles all the way down at 7:04 AM on February 2, 2005


Cue the Pirate Ninja Monkey Robots!
posted by Devils Rancher at 7:17 AM on February 2, 2005


The first link: what does this say about human porn consumption? That if even monkeys buy porn, the desire for porn is natural and normal and please shut the hell up about it? How much further down the evolutionary ladder can we go and find porn purchases? (Hey, buddy, wanna see a pair of great tits?) And does this explain the spelling in porn spam?

The second: I don't know. I'm sure sexual desire and pleasure can be mimicked in robots if it can occur in eensy-weensy aminals, but apparently the professor, supposedly "no crank," says "the software, which will be installed in a robot within the next three months, will give the machines the ability to feel, reason and desire." That sounds like crank territory to me, if they're talking about now.

But what I'm really wondering is would monkeys pay robots for sex? Would monkeys pay to watch robots have sex? Robot monkeys? What would robots want in return? Or would robots be satisfied with the monkey sex alone? Would robots pay monkeys? And don't you get the sad feeling we will be left out of this as robots and monkeys go off to frolic in the bushes?
posted by pracowity at 7:18 AM on February 2, 2005


Hmmmmm, RobotMonkeyPorn.com is available...PROFIT !
posted by lobstah at 7:26 AM on February 2, 2005


Finally, a mcgraw sciience FPP where the multiple stories are actually related in an obvious way! This is truly a special day.

Oh, and pracowity, nice pic. But I prefer looking at boobies.
posted by soyjoy at 7:34 AM on February 2, 2005


pracowity: my new god.
posted by squirrel at 7:41 AM on February 2, 2005


oh my god, soyjoy, you're right! this is coherent! drinks all around!

also, thanks for the comic link, seanyboy.
posted by Igor XA at 7:48 AM on February 2, 2005


I for one welcome our lusty robot overlords.
posted by Foosnark at 8:12 AM on February 2, 2005


Ok, reporters seem to be absolutely pissing themselves about the UbiBot architecture, but I have yet to see a damn thing about it other than fawning, sci-fi relating reports by non-tech newspapers. Anyone got some actual decent content about this?

Here's an ICARA paper on Rity, a software version of this (though, without the sex, so don't get too excited) (PDF)
posted by qDot at 8:43 AM on February 2, 2005


Why does the combination of any two of {monkey, robot, pirate, ninja} always amuse a nerd?

Don't forget the NINJA WIZARDS!
posted by breath at 9:02 AM on February 2, 2005


NinjaMage79: Wanna cyber?
TeenFlower: K. I'm walking over to my bed.
NinjaMage79: I put on my robe, wizard hat, and shuriken!
TeenFlower: What?
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 9:28 AM on February 2, 2005


I just wonder if people who are developing robots with feelings are sitting around going "Yes, the matrix...good movie, lets keep that for ideas. Hey, remember those movies where Arnold was a robot?"

Can't we make safe little Haley Jo Osmont robots?
posted by Hands of Manos at 10:46 AM on February 2, 2005


I can't believe I can't find a working link to either of the music videos for the song "Monkey vs. Robot" by James Kolchalka. Hell, I just worked a job with the director the other day. Anyone have better Googlefu?
posted by fungible at 11:29 AM on February 2, 2005


The robots are coming!
posted by vbfg at 12:43 PM on February 2, 2005


Why does the combination of any two of {monkey, robot, pirate, ninja} always amuse a nerd?

And zombies! Can't forget zombies.

Hell, just thinking about cyborg-zombie-pirates makes me happy.
posted by quin at 1:43 PM on February 2, 2005


mp3.com

free registration likely required. i haven't visited mp3.com for at least 3 years...
posted by nequalsone at 2:18 PM on February 2, 2005


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