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...nor hell a fury like a woman scorned
May 3, 2005 6:01 PM   Subscribe

"Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned/Nor hell a fury like a woman scorned." (by way of William Congreve) [via MoFi]
posted by AlexReynolds (57 comments total)

 
removed!
posted by Mach5 at 6:02 PM on May 3, 2005


whadiditsay? whadiditsay?
posted by Baby_Balrog at 6:07 PM on May 3, 2005


In case the Craigslist admins are no fun...

Please read carefully - w4m, with some updates at the end - w4m - 41

Reply to: anon-71453760@craigslist.org
Date: 2005-05-03, 2:17PM EDT

I'm the Chappaqua blonde, grey eyes, great smile and skin, 115, who was looking for a married man, 40-45, reasonably fit, must send pic etc etc.

I found my guy - the exact guy, in fact, that I was looking for
from the outset: my philandering husband. To the other 250+ married creeps who replied over the last two days - you should all pray your wives don't catch you out like this. Its so easy and obvious .. one doubts your collective intelligence. BTW, the 'meeting' at Starbucks in Greenwich never happened. I thought it made for good 'realism' though.

We won't be meeting next Tuesday at the Yorktown Starbucks. I have moved to my sister's house. "Jenni" who you spoke with on the phone was an actress and probably earned the easiest $500 of her life. My lawyer taped the conversation. My lawyer also has a copy of your response to my ad, and transcipts of our three IM conversations.

To send "Jenni" a pic, including me with my face blacked out, taken at our anniversary party, was utterly unbelievable and underscores the contempt you apparantly have for me.

I've also taken the PC and your other laptop. My lawyer will have a computer expert check them. I suspect you've done this more than once.

No doubt you think you've been very clever. I suspected something was wrong in February when M****** told me that you and C****** had been talking about internet "dating" at the club. C****** told M****** that you seemed very knowledgeable about it and that you had mentioned Craig's List casuals several times.

I'm not heartbroken now. That was yesterday. You've lost a wife who adored you. Faith is a two way deal and you blew it. You are an a-hole and a complete shit.

I've left a print out of this on the kitchen counter although I suspect you'll probably read this online before you get home, when you next check out the casuals.

I have had somebody remove and destroy our bed. When you get home you can sleep in the guest room. I have cancelled our dinner with J* and P**** Friday night. I have told my parents that we are divorcing and why. You should speak to your father. You should understand that as a consequence of your actions you will cause great sadness and heartbreak to a good man who has shown me nothing but affection, and whom I love dearly.

I've put all the jewelry, and the wedding ring you gave me, into
the storm drain at the end of the road. I've sent your mother's rings back to you father by recorded delivery. I didn't enclose a note - you can explain to him.

I have an appointment for a full STD check this afternoon. If I have the merest hint of any infection, I will send copies of your email, the IM chat and the pic you sent, to all our friends, your family and your work colleagues. Believe me, you will understand the meaning of the saying "revenge is a dish best served cold". I suggest you say a prayer that you haven't given me anything.

I'll see you in court. Don't call me - if you do, my lawyer will get a protection order against you.

Jennifer
posted by AlexReynolds at 6:09 PM on May 3, 2005


I can only think of one word appropriate to this situation, and that word is:

Pwned
posted by Ndwright at 6:11 PM on May 3, 2005


Whoa.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 6:13 PM on May 3, 2005 [1 favorite]


Bitches, man.
posted by jonmc at 6:13 PM on May 3, 2005


I have had somebody remove and destroy our bed.

I like this woman.
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 6:15 PM on May 3, 2005


Oh man. There's a big part of me that wants to stand and applaud, and I know it's not the best part of me but... oh my.

To send "Jenni" a pic, including me with my face blacked out, taken at our anniversary party

Ouch. Brutal.
posted by jokeefe at 6:19 PM on May 3, 2005


The thought of all those married men, looking on the internet to get some while their wives are none the wiser... so scary to me. (OK, that and I saw Sideways today, too).

Haha, yea, jokeefe, that was just STUPID on his part.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 6:21 PM on May 3, 2005 [1 favorite]


I don't normally post images on Mefi, but...



...looks like an approximate facsimile of what the guy must have felt when (if) he read that posting. Provided of course that the whole thing isn't a complete hoax to start with.
posted by clevershark at 6:26 PM on May 3, 2005


Ick. I think they both deserve to be alone.
posted by Eamon at 6:28 PM on May 3, 2005


Oh. Jesus.
That was the most horribly frightening and at the same time awesome thing I've ever read.
I think I'll show it to my fiancee.
That woman deserves some sort of medal.
posted by Baby_Balrog at 6:33 PM on May 3, 2005


Seems fake. Just saying.
posted by Mid at 6:37 PM on May 3, 2005


I suppose the biggest reason it seems fake is because if the woman was really all lawyered up, as she suggests, the lawyer would be screaming that she should not post something like this.

But maybe she doesn't listen to the lawyer.
posted by Mid at 6:41 PM on May 3, 2005


Interesting to me anyway: the William Congreve wiki link you provided, he's also responsible for the phrase "Music hath charms to soothe a savage breast" along with the "like a women scorned" line you mentioned. I would've bet Bill Shakespeare was responsible for both of those. I don't know nothing about Craigslist or cheatin' husbands, but I'm glad I learned about William Congreve tonight.
posted by marxchivist at 6:46 PM on May 3, 2005


If I have the merest hint of any infection, I will send copies of your email, the IM chat and the pic you sent, to all our friends, your family and your work colleagues.

Another thing the lawyer should prevent. If she has anything to sue over, she needs to play carefully.
posted by NickDouglas at 6:50 PM on May 3, 2005


This is G***
posted by odinsdream at 6:51 PM on May 3, 2005


Replying to a CL ad and following through with it are two completly different things. I spent a week in San Jose after my divorce was final last year and posted a few CE ads to CL at the suggestion of a old college buddy. I had a number of women reply and chat a good game, including some who were obviously married, and none of them followed through with it.

I had phone conversations.

I traded photos.

I chatted with some of them in ways that would make most of my more conservative friends blush.

Not once did I get laid.

Flirting with a CL ad posted seems to be a great way to pass a dull day at the office.

Just saying...

Now, I suspect that the ad is a fake too. There's no way a woman would dump all that jewelry into a storm drain. Mine took all the jewelry when she moved out with the man she'd had an affair with and they pawned it all before the divorce was final.

Plus, this lady doesn't know the meaning of a dish served cold. Revenge is something that I wanted to extract on my cheating ex until I heard what Frank sinatra had to say about it: "The best revenge is living well."

Of course, the guy's a putz for using a photo from their anniversary party though.
posted by DragonBoy at 7:00 PM on May 3, 2005


Revenge is something that I wanted to extract on my cheating ex until I heard what Frank sinatra had to say about it: "The best revenge is living well."

Truer words were never spoken.

And dumping a wedding ring down a storm drain? I have no problem believing this, provided the emotions were strong enough.... and the jewelry he bought her might have been crap anyway.
posted by jokeefe at 7:03 PM on May 3, 2005


Here is more from Chappaqua Jennifer on CL - So if you see a well dressed blonde, 41, 5'1, 115 with grey eyes and a great smile and skin, I suggest you look the other way.....
posted by clarkie666 at 7:03 PM on May 3, 2005


80% of you are unattractive, semi-literate crude baboons or just plain deceitful.

Hm, I'm mister typo, but this woman shouldn't be casting grammatical stones. I'd cut her slack for now-- the end of the relationship is damn hard-- but if she's still haunting Craigslist in a year, I'd begin to worry. Lock up your rabbits, ye unfaithful husbands.
posted by gesamtkunstwerk at 7:22 PM on May 3, 2005


That living well is the best revenge seems a little to much like denial to me. What happens if the revengee is living better?

Frasier: You know the expression, "Living well is the best revenge"?
Niles: It's a wonderful expression. Just don't know how true it is. Don't see it turning up in a lot of opera plots. "Ludwig, maddened by the poisoning of his entire family, wreaks vengeance on Gunther in the third act by living well."
Frasier: All right, Niles. [heads into the kitchen]
Niles: [follows him] "Whereupon Woton, upon discovering his deception, wreaks vengeance on Gunther in the third act again by living even better than the Duke."
posted by Mitheral at 7:25 PM on May 3, 2005


I just forgive people.

Like Jesus.
posted by Baby_Balrog at 7:28 PM on May 3, 2005


80% of you are unattractive, semi-literate crude baboons or just plain deceitful.

*writes 'yur a lyer' on cage wall in own poop*
posted by jonmc at 7:29 PM on May 3, 2005


DragonBoy writes " Now, I suspect that the ad is a fake too. There's no way a woman would dump all that jewelry into a storm drain."

If the story is true she probably "dumped" the whole wad of swag at a pawnshop...
posted by clevershark at 7:37 PM on May 3, 2005


Here is more from Chappaqua Jennifer on CL

Wow. She IS quite the bitch after all.
posted by clevershark at 7:40 PM on May 3, 2005


Someone so devoted to cleverly orchestrating the way to reveal her discovery to her husband wouldn't be so stupid as to provide evidence of duress and malice that could affect her in a divorce proceeding. Legally, she just wrote a post about how she destroyed a bunch of property and potentially slandered her husband based on her gut reaction to something.

Yeah, I know, I'm the cornflakes-defiler of the thread, but haven't enough "Craigslist revenge" posts been seen to know that most of them aren't true- or at least as true as the writer makes them out to be?
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 7:41 PM on May 3, 2005


XQUZYPHYR writes " Someone so devoted to cleverly orchestrating the way to reveal her discovery to her husband wouldn't be so stupid as to provide evidence of duress and malice that could affect her in a divorce proceeding."

Oh come on now, when has anything on Craigslist ever been accepted as evidence of anything?
posted by clevershark at 7:51 PM on May 3, 2005


Thats why I plan an immediate divorce. As I said, I was heartbroken yesterday. I've moved on today.

I reckon bullshit. It just seems all a little bit tooooo conveniently tied up with ribbons. I'd reckon most women in these circumstances would not conceive and act out a thorough plan within a day of something like this. stunt.
posted by peacay at 8:09 PM on May 3, 2005


Oh come on now, when has anything on Craigslist ever been accepted as evidence of anything?

Are you talking to me or to her? ;)
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 8:28 PM on May 3, 2005


He-he.. Busted!
posted by c13 at 9:59 PM on May 3, 2005


A cheating husband is a betraying bastard. This woman's (probably fake) response is just as putrid.

She behaves like a petulant child, showing she is just as empty on the inside as the cheating husband. I don't understand where all these damaged people come from... Oh wait, yes I do.
posted by teece at 10:49 PM on May 3, 2005


I'd reckon most women in these circumstances would not conceive and act out a thorough plan within a day of something like this. stunt.

well if she'd been suspecting something for a while... or he'd cheated before...
posted by stratastar at 11:11 PM on May 3, 2005


Ann Landers and/or Dear Abby looked for a New Haven postmark on a letter that raised a suspicion of Yale-boy gag.
posted by Cranberry at 11:39 PM on May 3, 2005


Her follow-up.
posted by AlexReynolds at 2:04 AM on May 4, 2005


I have an appointment for a full STD check this afternoon.

This has to be fake. There's no way anyone could get an appointment that quickly.
posted by jesourie at 5:14 PM on May 4, 2005


Pfft. I've tested as a walk-in. No appointment necessary.
posted by LionIndex at 5:53 PM on May 4, 2005


the followup was removed, Alex--what'd it say?
posted by amberglow at 6:01 PM on May 4, 2005


It said "all your base are belong to us."
posted by jonmc at 6:07 PM on May 4, 2005


newyork.craigslist.org > westchester > casual encounters > Chappaqua Jennifer - goodbye and last update - really - w4m
last modified: Wed, 4 May 01:58 EDT

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Chappaqua Jennifer - goodbye and last update - really - w4m - 41

Reply to: anon-71497771@craigslist.org

Date: 2005-05-03, 6:06PM EDT



Andria wrote to me to say:

"What a fucking self-righteous bitch!
I'm glad that you're getting a divorce. If I ever meet your husband,
I'd applaud him and shake his hand, I'm happy for him. Save all that
malice and resentment to yourself and for your next visit to the locos
doctor (psychoanalyst). Oh! and for your bloodsucker divorce lawyer.
Mind your own business stupid fish face, fucking cunt, hag, Jezebel,
pipeuser, salad tosser, slag, sword swallower, tacos and hot dogs,
trawler, tuna boat, baby dike, catcher, Do-Me Queen, Moody Judy,
Santorum, etc.
If I ever meet you in the streets I'll piss on you."

Yikes! And I thought this was all about me! Andria is actually
Alan. I know, because a guy called Alan with the same email address
responded to my ad yesterday. If I recall correctly, Alan lives in the
Bronx. I do remember he sent me a picture of his genitals, which were
considerably less impressive than the message above. Alan,
incidentally, wants to have sex with other women "to help save his
marriage". He didn't explain the logic of this reasoning.

************

To whoever wrote:

"Take it from a psychologist: Let go of the anger before the healing can begin. Wow are you angry."

Dear K. Not really pal. Just having fun by squishing an insect.
When my soon-to-be-ex gets home, I have a few additional suprises for
him. His stamp collection is in the kitchen garbage. By way of the
shredder in his den. He had one stamp that I couldn't quite bring
myself to destroy - more about that in a moment. Second surprise:
there's a lucky kid in Larchmont who is now the proud owner of half a
dozen very old baseball cards including a 1950s Mayes or Hayes or
something like that. Oh, the stamp: its a little blue thing and Andy
didn't want to pay its insurance premium. Anyway, I got one of his
little black stamp holders, superglued the stamp into it - then I went
for a nice afternoon drive, and stopped for lunch. I had sesame coated
tuna tartare and salad, and a glass of Sancerre. Then I stuck the
little stamp holder thingy with a good blob of superglue to the
underside of my table. I hope my ex-beloved has fun over the next month
figuring out which restaurent its in.

As I said, revenge is a dish best taken cold.

************

I just received this sophomoric mail:

"I just wanted to respond to your post. I know I wasn't one of the
men that recently emailed you. But why the harsh remarks about all the
men that post on craigslist? I was happily married for 4 years and just
found out that my wife and mother of my child has been cheating on me
for the last 13 months. So....I mean really, not all the men here are
scum. Some of the women can be pretty deceitful as well."

Whats your point James? The vast (I mean absolutely HUGE) majority
of posters here are guys. My guess is that the very few "women" posters
are eithers hookers or scam artists. Sure, women commit adultery too,
and I'm sure for you the feeling was as horrible as the feeling I
experienced. But you think your wife's unfaithfullness gives you carte
blanche to act the same way? Be a man for your child's sake, you
spineless little turd.

*************

I'm back from my doctor, results in a few days and, otherwise, I'm
done with this whole sorry mess. Once I send this, its a hot bath and a
large gin martini. Tomorrow I start a new life.


Some of the posts on CL have been critical of me for using CL to
catch my husband cheating. I am (was) his wife. We were married 11
years and I adored him, assumed he adored me, and that he was as happy
as I was. Thats what he told me. Since I had my suspicion in February,
I went out of my way ensure we had plenty of time together, a time when
anything could be discussed, including a week together in Aruba, and
another in the Bahamas. Nothing was said. I don't particularly want to
discuss my sexlife here, but I will say that during this time, things
were vigorous and daily. He had his opportunity to put anything on the
table. He didnt commit a hotheaded crime of passion. I could probably
get over a drunken fling with a cocktail waitress. He planned
premeditated adultery, and likely has done repeatedly. Thats why I plan
an immediate divorce. As I said, I was heartbroken yesterday. I've
moved on today.

Before I go, I want to make it very clear to you what I think about
the activities you guys (specifically, the married guys) get up to
here.

Quite simply, you're pond-scum: you are prepared to risk any happiness
that might remain in your marriages against the your lack of
self-control, decency and the promises you made to your wives. You're
prepared to risk the happiness of your children. You're prepared to
risk bringing disease to your wives. It's utterly contemptible. Be men
and get divorces, if thats what you really need.

I received a lot of emails and pictures in the last two days. 80%
of you are unattractive, semi-literate crude baboons or just plain
deceitful. The other 20% are clueless fratboys who shouldn't be allowed
in charge of real penises. I found a particularly ugly category in
those (married men) who sympathized with me against my soon-to-be-ex's
betrayal, and in the same breath, offered me comfort and TLC. Pond
scum.

All messages are deleted so you can all breathe a sigh of relief.
But I do have a good memory for faces and if I'm ever alone at a bar or
restaurent or shopping mall and one of you hits on me, or passes me,
believe me, my every instinct will be to spit in your faces. And if
you're with a woman, believe me, she and I will have a very direct and
interesting conversation.

So if you see a well dressed blonde, 41, 5'1, 115 with grey eyes and a great smile and skin, I suggest you look the other way. 71497771


Copyright © 2005 craigslist, inc. terms of use privacy policy feedback forum
posted by AlexReynolds at 6:11 PM on May 4, 2005


I wish CL would stop taking down the posts. This bitch is funny... I hope she really did do it. It would sadden me if this is a hoax. Although, it's true that she has no evidence that he would have actually gone through with the sex part - maybe he just likes flirting...

And, DragonBoy, you write:

Now, I suspect that the ad is a fake too. There's no way a woman would dump all that jewelry into a storm drain. Mine took all the jewelry when she moved out with the man she'd had an affair with and they pawned it all before the divorce was final.

Well, for one, it wasn't your wife who was "scorned", it was you. Of course your cheating wife would pawn her jewelry - she has no emotional attachment to it at that point. And, secondly, speaking as a woman, the "throwing down the storm drain" scenario is entirely feasible if her emotions were running rampant. Something she may regret later, but oh well. If it were me, I would have just left the ring on top of the note... much more powerful. But she's a nutjob, so of course she would do something rash like throw it down the storm drain.
posted by shoppingforsanity at 6:16 PM on May 4, 2005


I've put all the jewelry, and the wedding ring you gave me, into the storm drain at the end of the road.

This sort of thing does happen (see Mongo: Adventures in Trash) though I have never found jewelry.
posted by mlis at 6:30 PM on May 4, 2005


It's not how I would react (my husband knows his only escape is with a toe-tag attached), but I can't help but think, "you go, girl!" Provided the story is true, this guy is scum. If this is how she works through the pain of her husband fucking around, who am I to judge? I just hope there aren't any kids involved; this kind of venom will affect them.

shoppingforsanity: leaving the ring on the note would have been great. I'd probably be the sad sap that would keep the ring, get drunk and weep over it on a regular basis.

And why did CL delete the posts?!
posted by deborah at 7:09 PM on May 4, 2005


The Gender Genie thinks the author of the first piece is male. It also thinks the author of the second piece is male - I only entered "her" responses. I'm just saying...
posted by Joey Michaels at 7:13 PM on May 4, 2005


If this is how she works through the pain of her husband fucking around, who am I to judge?

Well, there's two sides to every story. A woman who gets this psychotic over the end of a relationship couldn't have been the easiest person to live with. Not that that excuses screwing around, but things are rarely black and white.
posted by jonmc at 7:14 PM on May 4, 2005


my husband knows his only escape is with a toe-tag attached

Maybe I should rethink my position on same-sex marriage...
posted by AlexReynolds at 7:16 PM on May 4, 2005


Well, some of us are jealous and can't countenance cheating. I'm with deborah. : >
posted by amberglow at 7:25 PM on May 4, 2005


Maybe I should rethink my position on same-sex marriage...

Well, I've said it before, but the one thing we can be sure of about gay marraige is that it will lead to gay divorce, which will of course lead to gay divorcees.
posted by jonmc at 7:34 PM on May 4, 2005


Well, some of us are jealous and can't countenance cheating.

I wouldn't mind getting caught cheating so long as I'd get matching toe-tags. One toe-tag would be gauche.
posted by AlexReynolds at 7:48 PM on May 4, 2005


As I said, revenge is a dish best taken cold.

Ok, clearly this is just someone trolling. Because the dish is most certainly not cold if you keep dishing out more straight from the oven. Cold means you wait. Like, for longer than ten minutes.

Sorry, I'm giving the female gender a little more benefit of the doubt in the brains department.

there's a lucky kid in Larchmont who is now the proud owner of half a dozen very old baseball cards including a 1950s Mayes or Hayes or something like that

Riiiight. I've never heard of this before. So original. So clever. "Oh, I don't know, Mike Bantle or something. I've personally never heard of the guy." See also: "Oh, RedAction Comics #1 or something. I don't know." See also: "Some car... I think it was called a Pore-sh. I don't know. He loved it more than he loved me." Blah, blah, blah.

I've got Shenanegans on the line.

Mine took all the jewelry when she moved out with the man she'd had an affair with and they pawned it all before the divorce was final.

Bitches, man... bitches.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 8:56 PM on May 4, 2005


I don't usually post images on MeFi either but I had to chime in with...

posted by SisterHavana at 9:30 PM on May 4, 2005


How long until she's selling his Corvette for $50? Is Jan Harold Von Brunwald around to look at this?
posted by klangklangston at 8:00 AM on May 5, 2005


...of course, maybe the baseball card was Willy Mayes Hayes
posted by klangklangston at 8:03 AM on May 5, 2005


this may not be MeFi etiquette appropriate, but SisterHavana, where did that pic of yours come from?
posted by shminny at 8:59 AM on May 5, 2005


Well, to be fair, the toe-tag thing goes both ways...
posted by deborah at 9:45 AM on May 5, 2005


I had seen it before, so I just did a Yahoo image search for "oh snap" and it came up. : )
posted by SisterHavana at 9:52 PM on May 5, 2005


It looks vaguely familiar, I think it's from a late 70's candy commercial.
posted by jonmc at 6:51 AM on May 6, 2005


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