Ministry of Cults rescues false turtle god

May 5, 2005 1:47 PM

Turtles, monks, money, and magic "Secretary of State for the Ministry of Cults and Religions, Chhorn Iem, said he had lost count of the number of fraudulent monks and gods that came to his ministry's attention....Police said the turtle was confiscated from the elderly woman, whom they did not name, and taken into protective custody....The monk was released with a caution" - A monk and an old woman tussle over a magic turtle.
posted by troutfishing (10 comments total)

But when [the monk] heard the woman had begun her own money-making business with the turtle, claiming it invoked miracles, he returned and tried to reclaim the reptile by force, Ros Vanna said.

Heh, according to Buddhist law in that part of the world, a monk cannot receive anything from a woman. A third party intermediary has to present it to the monk, or it has to be put down for the monk to pick it up. All she had to do was hold on to the turtle.
posted by furtive at 1:55 PM on May 5, 2005

bwaaaaaaaahahahahahahaha

Wow, I want a turtle with buddhist inscriptions carved into its shell! Unless it hurts the turtle...then I would pass...but what a l33t turtle it would be for $1.25 !

MetaFilter: We've lost count of the number of fraudulent monks and gods that came to our attention.
posted by gren at 1:58 PM on May 5, 2005

In the US, we call this kind of thing a "faith-based initiative"
posted by gurple at 2:03 PM on May 5, 2005

Yeah, but they don't fight over magic cows in Texas.
posted by troutfishing at 2:09 PM on May 5, 2005

Troutfishing:

Yes they do.
posted by dersins at 2:39 PM on May 5, 2005

Furtive: I didn't think that Theravada was the sect with the weird monk prohibitions. Could be wrong, though, since it's the oldest and most fundamentalist.
posted by klangklangston at 2:58 PM on May 5, 2005

Yeah, but they don't fight over magic cows in Texas.

Of course not. The magic cows are in Israel, not Texas.
posted by mr_roboto at 3:33 PM on May 5, 2005

Like y'all have never had a fight over a magic turtle before? C'mon!!
posted by kozad at 4:19 PM on May 5, 2005

[eyes downcast]
OK, kozad, you got me. I'm so, so sorry!!!

Here's a "religion" nut house a little closer to home. Lots of links from the diary. Let the Jihad begin!
posted by nofundy at 5:16 AM on May 6, 2005

"Turtles, monks, money, and magic"
- Wasn't that a Warren Zevon tune?
posted by Smedleyman at 1:08 PM on May 6, 2005