Darth Vader reads your mind

May 29, 2005 11:28 AM

Darth Vader reads your mind.
posted by Justin Case (79 comments total)

I was thinking of a locomotive and he guessed it in less than 20 questions. spooky
posted by Justin Case at 11:32 AM on May 29, 2005

Burger King loves Metafilter.
posted by dobbs at 11:32 AM on May 29, 2005

Jeez. I saw the Burger King logo and closed the brower window.
posted by PuppyCat at 11:34 AM on May 29, 2005

I guess Vader's got some free time before his son is old enough to come and try to kill him.
posted by Bugbread at 11:36 AM on May 29, 2005

We've discussed 20Q before, and I'm pretty sure this is just a lame branded flash interface for it.
posted by kickingtheground at 11:38 AM on May 29, 2005

The Burger King coming out and whispering the answer to Vader is pretty amusing.
posted by Jawn at 11:39 AM on May 29, 2005

It's all worth it to see the animation at the end. Let's just say it's a reward most fowl.

By 'all worth it', of course, I mean, it's always good to check in on how George Lucas has cashed in on my childhood hopes and dreams. It gives one perspective.
posted by Ubiq at 11:41 AM on May 29, 2005

Nice...If you go past twenty questions, Vader starts to treat you with some respect ("You are strong. You would make a strong asset.")

Kickingtheground : I'm pretty sure this is just a lame branded flash interface for it.

True. Though, like Jawn, I was kind of amused by the emperor being the Burger King.
posted by Bugbread at 11:41 AM on May 29, 2005

Plus, what kind of dark force is he if you can beat him with Persimmon?
posted by dobbs at 11:42 AM on May 29, 2005

The power of the dark side of the Force seems to have considerable difficulty with canteloupes.
posted by fatbobsmith at 11:43 AM on May 29, 2005

He doesn't know much about wargaming figures either. I guess because 40K is a different area of fandom.
posted by Bugbread at 11:44 AM on May 29, 2005

I chose "ice cream." His first three guesses were a joint, scotch and wine. I think we see who Burger King's target audience is here.
posted by fungible at 11:47 AM on May 29, 2005

You guys remember that scene in 'Jedi' when Darth Vader picks up his Burger King 'Emperor Palpatine' Collector's Cup and manages to throw it down a shaft even though the Collector's Cup is shooting blue lightning through Vader's entire body? That was awesome.
posted by Fuzzy Monster at 11:47 AM on May 29, 2005

Wow. He managed to guess "booger" on number 20.

I just wanted to see Darth Vader read my mind while I was thinking about boogers.
posted by Bugbread at 11:50 AM on May 29, 2005

what kind of dark force is he if you can beat him with Persimmon?

The power of the dark side of the Force seems to have considerable difficulty with canteloupes.

So he's not so good with the fresh fruits, huh? Well, what did you expect from a Burger King employee?
posted by casu marzu at 11:59 AM on May 29, 2005

I found his trash talk to be strangely threatening.


I stumped him with "magazine."
posted by lalalana at 11:59 AM on May 29, 2005

he wasn't able to guess "neurotransmitter"
posted by spacediver at 12:00 PM on May 29, 2005

He guessed Picture Frame correctly, but I stumped him with a CD.
posted by furtive at 12:03 PM on May 29, 2005

He didn't guess Alderann! Although to be fair, I started off by thinking of the moon, but then changed my mind to Alderann before I started... and he guessed the Moon at the end. So I guess I am a cheater.
posted by banished at 12:06 PM on May 29, 2005

I'm not too surprised that Vader is unfamiliar with vibrators. However, it is somewhat surprising that he doesn't appear to know what a light saber is.
posted by Bugbread at 12:08 PM on May 29, 2005

he got plutonium.
posted by muppetboy at 12:18 PM on May 29, 2005

"midichlorian" Vader does not get.
posted by ch3ch2oh at 12:18 PM on May 29, 2005

bugbread: he got light saber for me. But then, he did say that my thoughts betrayed me, so maybe I'm just weak-minded...
posted by Stauf at 12:27 PM on May 29, 2005

bug bread...he managed saber. just not light saber.
posted by filmgeek at 12:29 PM on May 29, 2005

It got "wombat." I'm amazed at how a good 20 questions algorithm is able to narrow the universe of all possible objects within 20 questions, especially given how many "maybe" and "sometimes" answers are given.
posted by thedevildancedlightly at 12:30 PM on May 29, 2005

The prologue scroll, done in the same style as the films:

THE SITH SENSE

It is a time of intergalactic uncertainty. Darth Vader's power continues to grow. He is now honing his abilities on anyone and everyone.

If you think of an object, he will ask you questions, read your thoughts and tell you what you were thinking of. All within twenty questions.

This object can be anything, as long as its general, as Lord Vader doesn't concern himself with specifics. He'll answer "Human being", but he won't answer "your friend Chuck".

The more you challenge Vader, the more intelligent he becomes as he continues his quest to become the most powerful force in the galaxy...

Nice work. It's dumb enough that George Lucas himself could have written it.
posted by casu marzu at 12:30 PM on May 29, 2005

damn. he got rubber ducky too!
posted by muppetboy at 12:33 PM on May 29, 2005

i was thinking lord vader's experience of rubber duckies might be limited. but apparently i was wrong.
posted by muppetboy at 12:35 PM on May 29, 2005

Hapsburg Empire 1, Lord Vader 0.
posted by scody at 12:38 PM on May 29, 2005

Vader asked me, "Does it weigh more than a duck?" What, is he concerned that my object might be a witch?
posted by yarmond at 12:39 PM on May 29, 2005

he couldn't guess "woman"...
posted by C17H19NO3 at 12:43 PM on May 29, 2005

beat him with "a sandwich".
Also...
Darth Vader reads your e-mail.
posted by boo_radley at 12:47 PM on May 29, 2005

well i stumped him on "the death star", but maybe that's specific. he did get "space station", which is suppose is close enough.
posted by muppetboy at 12:48 PM on May 29, 2005

He seems to have quite the fixation with sex and hockey players, too.
posted by Bugbread at 12:54 PM on May 29, 2005

I was thinking twins, he guessed soulmate. Guessed losing Padme put him in denial.
posted by phyrewerx at 1:01 PM on May 29, 2005

hmmm ... he got cigarette lighter on question 19 ... so close ...
posted by pyramid termite at 1:04 PM on May 29, 2005

Ok, him guessing Orc and Cannibals is a sign that a mere human can flummox the Sith.
posted by phyrewerx at 1:05 PM on May 29, 2005

Well, he knows condom now, and apparently already knew lubricant. I don't think this game is going to be child safe for very long. I'm going to teach him a few sets of responses for "Ted Koppel" that would also work for common items. Boring game, but fun to sabotage.
posted by Derive the Hamiltonian of... at 1:26 PM on May 29, 2005

Dude. He couldn't get 'tennis ball'

Lame
posted by redbeard at 1:30 PM on May 29, 2005

Lord Vader couldn't guess "dildo" in 30 questions. I am most displeased.
posted by ktoad at 1:34 PM on May 29, 2005

What's with the Stormtrooper sneaking around behind Vader? He reminds me of this crazy drunk guy that used to bug me when I worked in a watch repair shop.

Vader could not guess iguana, but he saw correctly that my heart is full of evil.
posted by palinode at 1:53 PM on May 29, 2005

He said I would make an excellent addition to the dark side. But I already told them I would not pledge their stupid frat.

He guessed popsicle (I was thinking Otter Pops, but he said no specific objects) and Triceratops, but couldn't guess cloud in 30 tries. Around question #25, he asked if it could be found in the sky, and I said yes. After question 30, he presented me with a list of options, one of which was "a drunk". I guess, if he's on a commercial airline flight.
posted by Eideteker at 1:58 PM on May 29, 2005

Funny, he got 'tennis ball' in 29 questions with me. He asked a lot of questions with vague answers for that object, like 'is it a household item' and 'is it used at night'.
posted by A dead Quaker at 2:08 PM on May 29, 2005

Dark side? More like that Burger King guy belongs to the dork side.
posted by Staggering Jack at 2:16 PM on May 29, 2005

lol. I broke it. I just gave random answers for quite a while, and Vader's just staring back at me, the orb spinning without words and the music happliy maching along.

Dark Side 0
MeFites 1
posted by VulcanMike at 2:24 PM on May 29, 2005

Couldn't get "The Force" - what a maroon!
posted by senor biggles at 2:28 PM on May 29, 2005

It took more than 27 times to get notebook.
posted by drezdn at 2:38 PM on May 29, 2005

I broke it. My bad. Sorry. Vader's just staring back at me now too, with the orb spinning and the music, but he's just standing there like a doofus.

I outsmarted him. He was saying "Nebula" and answers that were way off base. After he failed with thirty questions, when I submitted my answer, among the choices were "play (performance)" which was kinda close, but not close enough. My answer was "Motion Picture (movie)." He looks very embarrassed and dumbfounded.

He did get "Rain" on the 29th question, and got "goose" within twenty questions but first he asked if it were a duck. The obvious Burger King product placement's mildly annoying, but predictably tolerable.
posted by ZachsMind at 2:38 PM on May 29, 2005

It got that I was thinking about a vibrator.

Creepy.
posted by dflemingdotorg at 3:08 PM on May 29, 2005

Funny, he guessed "sandwich" correctly for me, but only several questions after I had to click "close" to "I'm thinking it's a ham sandwich?" Couldn't get anything else right. You'd think they'd train it better with Star Wars phrases.

*Jedi mind trick hand wave* These aren't the items you're looking for!
posted by Soliloquy at 3:26 PM on May 29, 2005

dflemingdotorg : "It got that I was thinking about a vibrator.

"Creepy."

That was probably because of me.
posted by Bugbread at 3:28 PM on May 29, 2005

I was thinking 'guitar', which stumped him. But not before he'd tried sitar, mandolin and ukulele with me. Odd.
posted by calico at 3:47 PM on May 29, 2005

Well, pomegranate in exactly 20 questions. But I don't think that the Burger King's participation is particularly amusing. Lucas is fast becoming one of the "if I could go back in time and kill" personalities of our generation.
posted by dreamsign at 3:57 PM on May 29, 2005

After I answered that my object was red, tastes sweet, and can be used in a pie, Darth asked me if it had four legs. I doubt the power of the Dark Side.
posted by ChrisTN at 3:57 PM on May 29, 2005

"Is it larger than a microwave?"

Mmm. Well, yes. Not larger than a microwave oven, no, but a microwave? Definitely.
posted by dreamsign at 4:06 PM on May 29, 2005

Guessed "viola" in 20, "terrier" in 19, but -- Eddie Izzard bit about ordering penne arribiata on the Death Star notwithstanding -- was utterly stumped by "pasta."
posted by scody at 4:16 PM on May 29, 2005

I hate to sound like a size queen, but I always thought Darth Vader would be, well, bigger than the Burger King.
posted by maryh at 4:22 PM on May 29, 2005

Maryh, not sure what you mean by size per say, but I thought the same thing and figured they could at least get someone who could actually fill out the Vader costume to stand there and make gestures. The costume looks about two sizes to large for this kid.

Meanwhile, mini-Darth didn't get titanium and he "thought he would ask more questions to toy with me." I am going to the bar now and use the Jedi mind trick there...
posted by fluffycreature at 4:55 PM on May 29, 2005

I'm never quite sure how to answer these. If the object I'm thinking of is "clitoris" ... well, how do I answer the question "Can it be found in a classroom?" I mean, yeah, chances are you'll find one if you look in the right places, but answering "Yes" is only gonna confuse it.
posted by kafziel at 5:00 PM on May 29, 2005

Holy crap, he got amphallang.

I'm quite disturbed by that.
posted by xthlc at 5:08 PM on May 29, 2005

The Dark Side is strong in him.

He got web cam....
posted by Samizdata at 5:36 PM on May 29, 2005

xthic- I had to look that up, and now I'm disturbed that there's such a scientific-sounding word for that.
posted by BuddhaInABucket at 5:40 PM on May 29, 2005

It took him 29 questions to get "desk calender" and I sort of that gave that to him, because I was thinking of a wall calender.
posted by fossil_human at 5:41 PM on May 29, 2005

oops: "I sort of gave that" not "that gave".
posted by fossil_human at 5:41 PM on May 29, 2005

Well, the microwaves found in an oven are about a foot long.
posted by Axaxaxas Mlö at 6:06 PM on May 29, 2005

Stumped him with Tivo, which is funny, since it's probably the reason he exists in this form.
posted by unsupervised at 6:27 PM on May 29, 2005

couldn't run with "scissors" got bored at 26 questions.
posted by pointilist at 6:43 PM on May 29, 2005

It couldn't get "Big Mac." It seemed to think that "Cheeseburger" was close enough. At least it didn't guess "Whopper."
posted by donkeymon at 7:03 PM on May 29, 2005

stumped him with 'arsenic'.
posted by dhruva at 7:25 PM on May 29, 2005

It's kinda cool that this thing will "learn." Yeah, Lucas is a whoremaster (but only because 'pimp' has non-negative connotations to it these days).

/guess Lord Vader knows about B.acgerial A.rtificial C.hromosome clones now, dang!
posted by PurplePorpoise at 8:24 PM on May 29, 2005

what did you expect from a Burger King employee?

would you like an apple pie with that?

these ads go well with the tone of the movie.
posted by nola at 10:01 PM on May 29, 2005

What kind of sith lord is he I stumped him with darth vader? His guesses were an elf, a leprechaun, and a wookie.
posted by jackdirt at 10:17 PM on May 29, 2005

He got Joystick on the first try (like question 20)
posted by vagus at 11:32 PM on May 29, 2005

"You have the skills [breathing] to pay the bills"
posted by flippant at 12:19 AM on May 30, 2005

Oh my. He got Hub/Router by question 19.
I'm impressed.

I must meditate with the Force on this.
posted by slf at 5:43 AM on May 30, 2005

I thought I'd exhausted any humor inherent in it until this exchange, thinking of the word "vibrator":

"Is it used for entertainment?"
-- Yes
"Is it electronic?"
-- Yes
"I'm thinking it's a bratwurst."
posted by Bugbread at 6:24 AM on May 30, 2005

No "atom."
posted by state fxn at 1:12 PM on May 30, 2005

I was thinking vibrator, Vader thought I was thinking wedding ring. Hmm.....
posted by ferociouskitty at 4:01 PM on May 30, 2005

Vader seems to have quite the problem with vibrators.
posted by Bugbread at 6:58 PM on May 30, 2005