Cumming: the fragrance

August 3, 2005 9:34 PM

Thisis what you get when you cross an award winning actor, an award winning perfumer, and an award winning creative director (Jason Schell). May be NSFW in some offices, adjust volume where necessary.
posted by FlamingBore (37 comments total)

My name is Johnny Fuckerfaster, and I've just been offered my own fragrance.
posted by adgnyc at 9:58 PM on August 3, 2005

"Cumming: the fragrance"... er, no thanks.
posted by clevershark at 10:07 PM on August 3, 2005

"...combining three distinct talents to bring you a scent that is all about Sex, Scotch, Cigars and Scotland." I'm not sure I want my cologne to be all about cigars. And what exactly does Scotland smell like?

If this is a hit, can the Dick Butkus fragrance be far off?
posted by Slack-a-gogo at 10:16 PM on August 3, 2005

When I heard about this last year, I thought it was lame. After seeing the new commercial, I feel nauseous. It was anything but sexy. The only thing he kisses is his dog - in his underwear. And can someone get some make-up remover for that guy? I think his mascara's running.
posted by Moral Animal at 10:26 PM on August 3, 2005

v-i-r-a-l
posted by The Jesse Helms at 10:29 PM on August 3, 2005

I forget. Did he win the award for Flinstones 2, Garfield, Spice World, Spy Kids 2 (or 3-d), Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion, Son of the Mask, Investigaing Sex, Josie and the Pussycats, Anniversary Party, Goldeneye, Company Man, X2, or something else?

And since I'm in a question mood... how the fuck could one actor be in so many bad movies in less than a decade and still have a career?
posted by dobbs at 10:50 PM on August 3, 2005

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Viral_marketing
posted by ryanhealy at 10:59 PM on August 3, 2005

That was horrible. But Josie and the Pussycats was good. Parker Posey!
posted by Wood at 11:00 PM on August 3, 2005

Pepsi Spooge
posted by sourwookie at 11:04 PM on August 3, 2005

I heard he was going to write an autobiography, and call it "Cumming on Cumming". /rimshot

Actually he really did say that on TV a while ago (I think it was on SNL).
posted by clevershark at 11:05 PM on August 3, 2005

dobbs: he won a best actor tony for "cabaret."

the one thing i like about this ad is alan cumming's giddy and gleeful giggling at his own surname right at the very end. he briefly made some talk show rounds some time ago to discuss his upcoming fragrance, and every interview he gave was basically, "tee hee hee!" which i find, you know, devastatingly charming on a man.
posted by jennanemone at 11:28 PM on August 3, 2005

dobbs- because he played the emcee in Cabaret a while back and us fangirls can forgive a lot.
posted by amandaudoff at 11:29 PM on August 3, 2005

Exactly what I was thinking when I checked his resume, dobbs.

And he had a kinda creepy Pee-wee Herman thing happening about him. Men with makeup. It just doesn't work for me.
posted by uncanny hengeman at 11:29 PM on August 3, 2005

Men with makeup work for me, especially when they are as hot as Alan Cumming.

Also, he was hilarious in the TV series "The High Life," and a funny, sexy man DEFINITELY does it for me, especially in makeup.
posted by Chasuk at 12:00 AM on August 4, 2005

I look forward to Andy Dick's inevitable take on it.
posted by wsg at 12:37 AM on August 4, 2005

v-i-r-a-l failed on me because I didn't have the right plugin. I'm not anti consumerism, I'm just one version behind.
posted by NewBornHippy at 12:54 AM on August 4, 2005

When I heard about this last year, I thought it was lame. After seeing the new commercial, I feel nauseous. It was anything but sexy. The only thing he kisses is his dog - in his underwear. And can someone get some make-up remover for that guy? I think his mascara's running.

I don't think it's really meant to be sexy.. I think it's kinda a joke... And the laugh at the end seems to be more at the false sincerity then the name...
posted by Meccabilly at 12:59 AM on August 4, 2005

"It's about your essence"
posted by fullerine at 1:01 AM on August 4, 2005

Um, I'm pretty sure it's meant as a joke. I read the laugh in the same way Meccabilly did. It's a brilliant piece of comedy. One need only look at the ridiculous "two finger" ring he's wearing to know that it isn't to be taken seriously.
posted by aladfar at 1:16 AM on August 4, 2005

this is very funny. typical piss-take cumming but made odder by the fact he really has his own, obviously gay as they cum, fragrance to market.
posted by veryape at 1:27 AM on August 4, 2005

wsg writes "I look forward to Andy Dick's inevitable take on it."

"Dick and Cumming: together at last."
posted by clevershark at 1:50 AM on August 4, 2005

What a giggle that scotsman is. Is it a real parfume or is he just kidding?
posted by bully6 at 4:18 AM on August 4, 2005

I love Alan Cumming and think the commercial is funny. He seems to take every single part offered to him no matter how dubious the project and yet he always comes across well. And he obviously has a sense of humor about himself.

I've been looking forward to the marketing campaign ever since I heard Cumming was, er, coming out.
posted by LeeJay at 4:43 AM on August 4, 2005

Wow. I hardly believed it when he made the talk show rounds. Can he market a sucessful fragrance based just on a cheeky name double-entendre? Stranger things have happended.
posted by VulcanMike at 4:47 AM on August 4, 2005

How cheeky.
posted by Rothko at 5:12 AM on August 4, 2005

interesting...wasn't sure what to think about it... not badly done..hopefully it's humor, I hate to think that there is a market for that based on that commercial.. I would NOT want to be associated with anyone that actually bought/used the product...scares the bejesus out of me..

disappointed that most of the rest of the web site isn't functional.... links to pages that don't exist just scream.."hey, look, we really don't know how to be on the web....!"
posted by HuronBob at 5:32 AM on August 4, 2005

Hilarious. Saw this a couple days ago and thought, who's Alan Cumming? Now I know why I didn't know him. But this, this is really funny.
posted by voltairemodern at 5:34 AM on August 4, 2005

I really thought it was a satirical shot at the rediculous posing and banter in perfume commercials. If he's gay then this is just silly, because those moves and lines are stupid when women do them. If he was a drag-queen (or a transvestite, for that matter) I might be more understanding.
posted by es_de_bah at 5:58 AM on August 4, 2005

It's a real product.

Am I incredibly immature for giggling at Sephora classifying it as a "woody" fragrance ?
posted by gatorae at 6:17 AM on August 4, 2005

Oh yeah it's real...$69
posted by Jikido at 6:22 AM on August 4, 2005

Just wait til Santorum comes out with his fragrance. ; >
posted by amberglow at 6:36 AM on August 4, 2005

Just wait til Santorum comes out with his fragrance. ; >

"Frothy?" eeeeeeeeeeeeewwwww.
posted by Jikido at 7:09 AM on August 4, 2005

I'm pretty sure this isn't the product for me. I don't think I want to smell like Cumming. (couldn't resist)
posted by clevershark at 7:26 AM on August 4, 2005

This made the corn smut look enticing by comparison.
posted by fungible at 8:06 AM on August 4, 2005

us fangirls can forgive a lot

I always forgive him because of Bernard & the Genie, it's my favourite christmas movie, evar.

If he's gay

He said he was bi in a Toronto tv interview a few years back.
posted by zarah at 8:22 AM on August 4, 2005

Did somebody just post a commercial?
posted by mrgrimm at 11:50 AM on August 4, 2005

You would figure he would have gotten used to his own last name by now. Thank goodness he's not Allan Fagina, or all he would ever do is giggle.
posted by maxsparber at 6:57 PM on August 4, 2005