Baboosh!

November 18, 2005 9:46 AM

Bryanboy: Le Superstar Fabuleux.Apparently Derek Zoolander was based on a real person; and he blogs. "Adventures of the new-moneyed classess bitch from hell. Vulgarity is the new discreet. Trash is the new exclusivity. Third world has never been this *burp* chic. You just have to scroll down as in down!"
posted by XQUZYPHYR (31 comments total)

I mean by a picture a beautiful, romantic dream of something that never was, never will be--in a light better than any lights that ever shone--in a land no one can define or remember, only desire--and the forms divinely beautiful--and then I woke up...
posted by carsonb at 9:54 AM on November 18, 2005

Good god. I usually have not had a serious problem with fur, but this douchebag gushing over his dead fox spread-eagled on the floor, head and all, is making me ill. I mean, SOME respect for the dead, please? Maybe at least take the head off? Anyway, other than that, BLUE STEEL!! Love the pants.
posted by spicynuts at 9:56 AM on November 18, 2005

Why do I get the feeling this guy's life is going to be an afterschool special someday?
posted by fenriq at 10:00 AM on November 18, 2005

Those pixie boots suit him.
posted by fire&wings at 10:00 AM on November 18, 2005

I know BryanBoy and just invited him to check out the thread.
posted by postmodernmillie at 10:02 AM on November 18, 2005

ask him if he's available for parties
posted by spicynuts at 10:09 AM on November 18, 2005

If you're ever in the Philippines, look him up. He's truly the Thrilla in Manila.
posted by postmodernmillie at 10:12 AM on November 18, 2005

he's the thrilla with chinchilla in manila
posted by spicynuts at 10:18 AM on November 18, 2005

I wouldn't say that this post sucks but this guy is a pretty empty human being.
posted by Optimus Chyme at 10:22 AM on November 18, 2005

I wouldn't say that this post sucks but this guy is a pretty empty human being.

Really? The totality of a person is judgeable from his clothes and his blog?
posted by spicynuts at 10:23 AM on November 18, 2005

I even rode this cute huge animal. It's kinda like a horse but like it has these 2 weird mounds on its back. I forgot what they're called. I see these whenever I watch the Discovery Channel and these are like all over the place in exotic places like Egypt or like Mongolia or whatever.

It sounds kind of, um, over-the-top. "Fake," one might almost say.
posted by booksandlibretti at 10:24 AM on November 18, 2005

Really? The totality of a person is judgeable from his clothes and his blog?
posted by spicynuts at 10:23 AM PST on November 18

If the blog is about his fabulous clothes then yes.
posted by Optimus Chyme at 10:26 AM on November 18, 2005

Assuming it's not parody, of course, but I can't distinguish between satire and reality anymore.
posted by Optimus Chyme at 10:27 AM on November 18, 2005

im w. b&libretti. this just seems too empty to be real. i think the blog's even more fake than the cat its tryin to portray
posted by elykcooks at 10:28 AM on November 18, 2005

Must he cock his leg up and swell his chest in every photo? I mean, come on.
posted by ijoshua at 10:30 AM on November 18, 2005

This has got to be a joke.
posted by clevershark at 10:50 AM on November 18, 2005

Why would a moneyed classless bitch be buying a crappy $1.80 dinner from 7-11?

If its a joke then its pretty well done but isn't really very funny which makes it not very well done, I guess.
posted by fenriq at 10:57 AM on November 18, 2005

Why would a moneyed classless bitch be buying a crappy $1.80 dinner from 7-11?

Slumming? Plus, he's classless. That opens the doors to allowing oneself to eat lunch out of a styrofoam platter.
posted by spicynuts at 11:16 AM on November 18, 2005

I followed a link to his site about 8 months ago. He had just bought a Louis Vuitton denim Speedy bag and posted the scanned invoice so everyone could all see how much money he paid for it, and then posed for about...oh....87 googlegadzookbazillion photographs of himself with the bag.

After that, I successfully made myself believe that it was all a dream, and no one named Bryanboy really existed. Until today.
posted by iconomy at 11:20 AM on November 18, 2005

This MySpace analog wants to be my friend.
posted by sourwookie at 11:45 AM on November 18, 2005

Is BryanBoy gay?
posted by fandango_matt at 1:10 PM on November 18, 2005

No, that pouty guy with the shoutout on his abs is just his cousin.
posted by puke & cry at 1:19 PM on November 18, 2005 [1 favorite has favorites]

Must he cock his leg up and swell his chest in every photo? I mean, come on.

I was gonna say at least Zoolander had more than one pose. Baboosh!
posted by mrgrimm at 2:13 PM on November 18, 2005

Wow. What a guy. I think if I saw him all over the Great Wall like that I'd collapse to the floor and instantly start screaming and farting explosively.
posted by Sticherbeast at 2:24 PM on November 18, 2005

Wow. Exploring further:

"When I saw my grandfather's grave, I realized, SHIT...

WE MUST BE SOOO FUCKING POOR.

It really is not funny to see one of your ancestors buried in a nasty plot when clearly there are others ON TOP OF THE FOOD CHAIN who have full-blown familial mausoleums."

My head hurts.
posted by Sticherbeast at 2:36 PM on November 18, 2005

I like him. Be all you can be, baybee.
posted by stray at 2:51 PM on November 18, 2005

Baboosh!
posted by fandango_matt at 2:52 PM on November 18, 2005

P.S. THIS MESSAGE GOES OUT TO ALL ANTI-FUR PEOPLE OUT THERE.

I WOULD RATHER BE CREMATED ALIVE WITH MY ASHES THROWN OUT ON THE SLOPES OF GSTAAD THAN WEAR SOMETHING LIKE [a North Face fleece jacket.]


/me places hand discreetly over the logo on his North Face fleece jacket...
posted by darkstar at 3:14 PM on November 18, 2005

I don't have the attention span to read his site in detail. But what does he do for a living? He must be financing all those handbags somehow...?
posted by bering at 3:20 PM on November 18, 2005

Tina D: My god, I'm so glad we were born pretty.

Me: That's true. Beautiful people get everything in this life. Fame. Fortune. Sex.

Tina D: I can't even imagine what it's like to be not-pretty.

Me: You're the only one who's pretty, not me bitch.

Tina D: You're pretty too... compared to them (points at random strangers)

Me: But they're not faggoty and camp as a row of pink tents like I am. Try being a flamer for a day.

Tina D: That's true.

Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!


On second thought, my North Face fleece is sounding better all the time...
posted by darkstar at 3:20 PM on November 18, 2005

You better listen to your friend Billy Zane.
posted by First Post at 3:35 PM on November 18, 2005