Doctor, what do you make of these x-rays?

March 12, 2006 1:06 AM

Just when you thought you'd seen all that the Internet had to offer: Um, here's some lovely, haunting x-ray porn. Yeah, it's art, but it's still probably NSFW. [MI]
posted by sjvilla79 (53 comments total)

Here's a mirror of all the images. There's a few more images in this package too. Um, sorry for some of the low resolution shots. Ha!
posted by sjvilla79 at 1:07 AM on March 12, 2006

man oh man check out that dental work -- 4 root canals? is that what i'm looking at in that last pic?
posted by lapolla at 1:13 AM on March 12, 2006

Who consents to having their genitals x-rayed?
posted by Optimus Chyme at 1:21 AM on March 12, 2006

Huh. Well, considering that it's 4:30am and she's not here to stop me, it looks like my wife will be waking up to some new desktop wallpaper [NSFW]. Rock on, Metafilter.
posted by Ryvar at 1:25 AM on March 12, 2006

OC, these people.
posted by Gyan at 1:26 AM on March 12, 2006

These are at least a couple of years old. Guess I have seen all the internet has to offer.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 1:34 AM on March 12, 2006

And that was the last boner he ever had....
posted by BlackLeotardFront at 1:34 AM on March 12, 2006

These are at least a couple of years old. Guess I have seen all the internet has to offer.

I'm applauding. You must feel great! Jesus.
posted by sjvilla79 at 1:37 AM on March 12, 2006

Gyan: "OC, these people."

I think what Optimus Chyme meant was not "who is prepared to have an intimate act examined by a team of strangers" but rather "what less-than-intelligent person would consent to have a dose of radiation aimed at his gametes". It might not give you cancer but could cause defects in the DNA of your sperm cells. After all, that's why you get a lead apron even if they only x-ray your foot - it's better to be safe than sorry.
posted by PontifexPrimus at 1:37 AM on March 12, 2006

I'm applauding. You must feel great! Jesus.

Sorry, did I hurt your feelings? Cause I really really really didn't want to do that! Please accept this cookie as compensation for your loss.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 1:51 AM on March 12, 2006

file under "Roentgenitalia"?
posted by rob511 at 1:52 AM on March 12, 2006

Please accept this cookie as compensation for your loss.

Cookie accepted. Now, let us be friends. Best friends.
posted by sjvilla79 at 2:07 AM on March 12, 2006

Those skeletons are covered in jellyfish!
posted by TwelveTwo at 2:36 AM on March 12, 2006

it looks like my wife will be waking up to some new desktop wallpaper

Unfortunately, the feelings of profound inferiority that image evokes in me prevents me from following your example.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 2:38 AM on March 12, 2006

Though I suppose it *could* be a woman with a very tiny head?
posted by PeterMcDermott at 2:39 AM on March 12, 2006

These are at least a couple of years old. Guess I have seen all the internet has to offer.

You're probably ready to start printing it out, then.
posted by runkelfinker at 3:17 AM on March 12, 2006

More from the "artist"
posted by armage at 4:13 AM on March 12, 2006

We all know that it's all about functional MRI porn these days. Of course, these old x-ray images profit from being retro chic.
posted by sindark at 4:28 AM on March 12, 2006

Stanislaw Lem wrote a book of fake reviews called A Perfect Vacuum which was aboslutely brilliant. In one he talked about an artist who showed humans copulating while being x-rayed. Considering the tone of the piece, I'm not sure whether he would be crying or snickering at this.
posted by Vaska at 4:36 AM on March 12, 2006

nice exposures!
posted by roboto at 4:46 AM on March 12, 2006

roboto induces spit-take in cgc373!
posted by cgc373 at 5:00 AM on March 12, 2006

Lem might view the artist the the way a theoretical physisicst views a lab tech. "I allready worked out the idea and what was going to happen, thanks for going to the trouble of proving me right though"
posted by Grimgrin at 6:01 AM on March 12, 2006

Yeah, I most fascinated by the dental work. It's rather unusual to have to think about tooth decay and fellatio at the same time. :)
posted by NucleophilicAttack at 6:29 AM on March 12, 2006

it looks like my wife will be waking up to some new desktop wallpaper

Morning dear, your skull looks nice today.
posted by BillyElmore at 7:12 AM on March 12, 2006

I think I know one of those girls.
posted by Eideteker at 7:17 AM on March 12, 2006

I don't get it.

They call them boners, but you can clearly see there is no bone.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 7:18 AM on March 12, 2006

They call them boners, but you can clearly see there is no bone.

That wouldn't be true if we were more like wolverines or seals, among other animals.
posted by TedW at 7:31 AM on March 12, 2006

The amount of radiation being fired at the gonads is a bit concerning.
posted by mert at 7:35 AM on March 12, 2006

However, many animals do have penis bones.
posted by nickyskye at 7:45 AM on March 12, 2006

Reminds me of this piece of entirely-infrared porn, The Operation starring Gina Velour. Unfortunately the pictures are neither erotic nor clever nor particularly interesting to look at - further proof, as if any were needed, that 'high-concept' describes schlock well beyond the realm of summer Hollywood action blockbusters. Oh well.

Can I just say I love the live preview function, by the way? It's such a simple thing but it works and for that I'm grateful.
posted by waxbanks at 7:46 AM on March 12, 2006

oops, TedW you beat me to it, lol.
posted by nickyskye at 7:46 AM on March 12, 2006

Um, has anyone looked at the other images in that directory?
posted by greatgefilte at 8:23 AM on March 12, 2006

greatgefilte: that was an art exhibit of a machine that reproduces the digestive processes of man. You'd put food in one end and eventually poo would come out the other end. I wonder if they ever fed it the meat dress.
posted by furtive at 8:30 AM on March 12, 2006

I can't help but focus the extent of the dental work these people have.
posted by crunchland at 8:39 AM on March 12, 2006

indeed, wtf is that? they all have appalling teeth!
posted by PenguinBukkake at 9:05 AM on March 12, 2006

I found the teeth to be horrendously and discomfortingly distracting. Did the 'artist' make a concerted effort to find people who have traditionally lacked in the dental hygiene department?
posted by five fresh fish at 9:26 AM on March 12, 2006

Did the 'artist' make a concerted effort to find people who have traditionally lacked in the dental hygiene department.

I think more likely, the type of people who agree to be filmed for coitus may have lacked a dental plan at some point in their life.

The tongue kiss one is great. It reminds me of the "Licker" from Resident Evil. Also, check out those hoop earrings in that shot.
posted by thanatogenous at 9:41 AM on March 12, 2006

I bet if you looked at them, they'd have pretty good teeth. A couple root canals here, a crown there, and quite a few fillings. Maybe they just grew up in a pre-flouridation place, and before dental sealants.

But Superman never mentioned anything about being distracted by Gotham's dental work.
posted by crunchland at 9:43 AM on March 12, 2006

I'm sure people's awful teeth were distracting to Superman, but he was just too polite to say anything.
posted by Astro Zombie at 10:12 AM on March 12, 2006

I'm not certain that I'd want any of his pieces in my home, but I find Wim Delvoye's work fascinating. Cloaca made the rounds a couple of years ago, as did his X-Ray photography. He's taken what is generally seen as vulgar and low-brow, and filtered it through a sort of scientific authority. Hence a complicated machine that processes food into shit and x-ray photographs of a blowjob.

Gena Velour's Operation is similarly compelling. Like Delvoye's x-rays it provides a sort of scientific empiricism to what some would call "base" acts. The film was featured on BoingBoing some time ago, if I recall correctly. I almost purchased it then and am giving some thought to it now.

Not only is it art, it's pretty good art.
posted by aladfar at 10:23 AM on March 12, 2006

Aside from the 2-second novelty of x-ray porn and shit machines, I find this completely lame. Not only not good art, it's not even art.

To provide the counterpoint.
posted by teece at 10:32 AM on March 12, 2006

"just one more photo shoot, to make sure we got it just right, whaddya say?"

and to think that artists used to have to woo their subjects with all that romantic crap. losers!
posted by Busithoth at 10:46 AM on March 12, 2006

If you find this stuff interesting, you should check out some of Phoebe Gloeckner's work (NSFW, duh).
posted by trondant at 10:58 AM on March 12, 2006

PontifexPrimus writes "'what less-than-intelligent person would consent to have a dose of radiation aimed at his gametes'. It might not give you cancer but could cause defects in the DNA of your sperm cells. After all, that's why you get a lead apron even if they only x-ray your foot - it's better to be safe than sorry."

People who've had vasectomies?

TedW writes "That wouldn't be true if we were more like wolverines or seals, among other animals."

More proof against ID, no baculums in humans.
posted by Mitheral at 11:00 AM on March 12, 2006

Will the internet as a whole please stop linking to that same article about The Operation until such time as it provides some mechanism by which I can actually view the film?

Thanks.
posted by Caviar at 3:02 PM on March 12, 2006

I've heard that on every trans-Atlantic flight, each passenger receives the equivalent radiation of 5 full-body x-rays.

So a few artistic nude exposures sounds like a fair trade in lifetime exposure - unless, of course, you also join the mile high club...
posted by fairmettle at 3:40 PM on March 12, 2006

I realize that people have varying stamina with regards to sexual intercorse and perhaps I missed something in the methods section, but with that paper that Gyan linked to, I am failing to understanding why they had trouble they did in getting people to "succeed in penetration." Even with using viagra, the longest they mention is 12 seconds of penetration. I'd guess that they meant 12 seconds without movement, except for the line "Six couples succeeded in partial, though not complete, penetration..."

On the other hand, what did these guys do to bring the women to orgasim in that short a period? Were they just lying to the scientists?
posted by The Bishop of Turkey at 3:42 PM on March 12, 2006

i totally had this idea years ago but had no way of getting an X-ray machine so i gave up.

i'd have gotten people with better teeth.

and thanks for the link to Phoebe Gloeckner's stuff.
posted by teishu at 6:41 PM on March 12, 2006

I fear for the future of art when it is reduced to this and jars of the artists urine.

I once saw an art show by Leonard Nimoy (yes that guy) of black and white nude photos. There were a few nifty shots but most of it was pretty "first-year art student" stuff. My thought was that I was pretty damn envious of a 60-plus year old guy taking photos of barely post-pubescent girls erect nipples and calling it art.

Gotta get in on this gig. I got plenty of black and white film, urine, etc.
posted by elendil71 at 10:13 PM on March 12, 2006

I think more likely, the type of people who agree to be filmed for coitus may have lacked a dental plan at some point in their life.

A most salient point. Especially those who agree to be x-rayed for coitus. Eek.
posted by five fresh fish at 10:23 PM on March 12, 2006

My thought was that I was pretty damn envious of a 60-plus year old guy taking photos of barely post-pubescent girls erect nipples and calling it art.

The art is in the process, not the product. The art of the con artist, y'know. That's how you end up with Piss Christ: the art is in making the scam work, not in what you actually sell. The art of the sale, the art of the huckster, the art of BS.
posted by five fresh fish at 10:26 PM on March 12, 2006

metafilter discussion on the Wim Delvoye's poop machine Cloaca here.

Apparently, I killed that discussion. Can I do that here, too??
posted by armacy at 9:02 AM on March 13, 2006

That wouldn't be true if we were more like wolverines or seals, among other animals.

One of my prized possessions is an Oosik, or walrus penis bone (real, not replica) from a friend in the Arctic. I even have a license to own it, provided by the Canadian government.

I can't wait until some idiot decides to break into my home and I club him into submission with it. I'm sure that the news media will have a field day :)
posted by Kickstart70 at 11:55 AM on March 13, 2006