They say what boys do in these fields makes them fast. Is it a coincidence that there are so many of them in the NFL?

April 16, 2007 10:58 PM

"I'm not from here, so when I was told that what these boys do in the fields makes 'em fast, I didn't believe it." Welcome to Muck City.
posted by kyleg (17 comments total)

Well, I can't say I wasn't hoping for something more sinister to be going on in there.
posted by Burhanistan at 11:27 PM on April 16, 2007 [1 favorite]

It feels overhyped, but then that is what ESPN and SI do best.
posted by bhouston at 11:51 PM on April 16, 2007

I really enjoyed reading that. It's a bit overwrought, but in a good way, if that makes sense... Poor bunnies, though :(
posted by amyms at 12:01 AM on April 17, 2007

amyms: now people who read the comments before the links will be hoppin' mad that the secret has been flushed out. serves the bastards right for jumping right in before reading links.
posted by Burhanistan at 12:05 AM on April 17, 2007 [1 favorite]

Burhanistan, Yikes, I didn't think of that!... But, I didn't reveal WHAT those boys are doing with those bunnies! *insert suspenseful music here*
posted by amyms at 12:10 AM on April 17, 2007

Overwrought is putting it mildly..

When the driver slams on the brakes, Tony leaps between the truck's cab and the trailing cage, plants one foot on the truck's bed and hurdles to the other side. The chase continues.

Did he just say a teenager jumped across a half-foot wide gap in an 18-wheeler?!?
posted by your mildly obsessive average geek at 12:14 AM on April 17, 2007

I read ESPN and SI (gack, i've just outed myself as a sports fan, something I usually don't mention in polite company like this) and I thought this was quite enjoyable. Perhaps the level of sports journailism is just so much lower than a great deal of writing that this really stood out.

I thought it was pleasantly dramatic. It took a little anecdote and nicely doled it out with some decent descriptive scene-setting. Not bad for a sports mag.
posted by django_z at 3:52 AM on April 17, 2007

That description of how to skin a rabbit -- would that work for a cat as well? Just asking.
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 5:22 AM on April 17, 2007 [1 favorite]

YMOAG, it was my understanding that the truck was moving through a field, not humming along on the highway.
posted by craven_morhead at 6:23 AM on April 17, 2007

This author must be paid by the word. This story (which IS interesting) could have been told with 1/8th the verbosity.
posted by schleppo at 6:32 AM on April 17, 2007 [2 favorites]

I'm with amyms -- I found it overwrought but fascinating. Thanks for the link!

(also, good pull-quote for the FPP, I could not conceive of what lurid thing might be inside...)
posted by pineapple at 7:22 AM on April 17, 2007

This is like a training sequence from any Rocky movie (I haven't seen Rocky VI: Oy My Back! yet).

But I must say, there probably is something to it. I am all for Rocky training; even did some myself the other day. I was doing pushups with my 40-lb. son on my back while head-butting my goofball Labrador Retriever in a fruitless attempt to keep him from licking my face and making me laugh.

You wouldn't believe how many push-ups I can do in those conditions!










8
posted by Mister_A at 7:32 AM on April 17, 2007 [2 favorites]

Editor's note: This story originally appeared in the April 9th issue of ESPN The Magazine.

Hmmm. A slightly late April Fool's Day joke?
posted by webmutant at 8:48 AM on April 17, 2007

That description of how to skin a rabbit -- would that work for a cat as well?
Well, that's one way....
posted by Floydd at 8:54 AM on April 17, 2007

I grew up in "Muck City", actually. But I was a big nerd and no one ever invited me to chase rabbits.
posted by the jam at 8:58 AM on April 17, 2007

I'm sure that coding C in those fields would make you a pretty impressive programmer, though.
posted by tehloki at 9:30 AM on April 17, 2007 [1 favorite]

heh - I couldn't believe how disappointed I felt when I realised that all these kids get superfast and then waste it playing...american football!!!
posted by jacalata at 11:32 PM on April 17, 2007