Star Wars: The Musical

September 19, 2007 6:09 AM

Star Wars: The Musical. Luke sings ("Uncle Owen I'm not like you. I can't just bury my dreams (in the sands of Tatooine)"). Vader sings ("Bring me the passengers - every child woman and man!"). C3PO sings ("I am a droid, so don't you mess with me."). And Han sings a ballad that starts off like "The Impossible Dream," then mutates into the bastard intergalactic cousin "Do You Hear The People Sing?" as it might be performed by Neil Diamond, Richard Burton and Peter Lorre.

From the FAQ: "Completed in 1999, Star Wars: The Musical is a musical version of Star Wars (A New Hope), written and recorded with original music and lyrics."

posted by grabbingsand (33 comments total)

Well, it's better than Starlight Express.
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 6:17 AM on September 19, 2007

I still prefer Silence of the Lambs: the Musical (otherwise known as "Silence!")
posted by ColdChef at 6:27 AM on September 19, 2007 [1 favorite]

There are few things that can make the Star Wars franchise more ridiculous than George Lucas already has.
posted by DU at 6:36 AM on September 19, 2007

Wow, the gf was in a college production of said musical. It's over three hours long, apparently...
posted by backseatpilot at 6:49 AM on September 19, 2007

Darth Vader - dark Darth Vader -
dark lord of the Sith.
Darth Vader - dark Darth Vader -
this guy isn't a myth.

Oy. Is Troy McLure starring in this one, too?
posted by PlusDistance at 6:51 AM on September 19, 2007 [1 favorite]

Does it feature Nick Winter's classic rendition of the theme: Star Wars... gimme those Star Wars!
posted by ALongDecember at 6:59 AM on September 19, 2007 [1 favorite]

If C-3PO must sing, let it be "I Am the Very Model of a Modern Diplomatic Droid."
posted by thomas j wise at 7:02 AM on September 19, 2007 [1 favorite]

tusken raider, tusken raider
tusken raider, tusken raider
tusken raider, tusken raider
oooooooooo, tusken raider

(to the tune of Rock Me Amadeus)
posted by fleetmouse at 7:02 AM on September 19, 2007 [3 favorites]

Charles Strouse and Lee Adams (of Annie and Bye Bye Birdie) wrote at least one act of a musical version in the early nineties. There's a demo tape floating around there somewhere.
posted by Epenthesis at 7:07 AM on September 19, 2007

It's still better than the prequels.
posted by justkevin at 7:19 AM on September 19, 2007 [1 favorite]

How the hell does a Star Wars musical make it ten years without being mentioned on The Blue?
posted by sourwookie at 7:39 AM on September 19, 2007

/obligatory
posted by Poolio at 7:49 AM on September 19, 2007

on the dais, on the dais
on the dais, on the dais
on the dais, on the dais
Jabba on the dais
posted by designbot at 7:56 AM on September 19, 2007

I remember a MAD magazine parody of Star Wars done musical style. The Death Star Battle was set to the tune of "We're Off to See the Wizard" and lyrics like "We're off to kill the bad guys, and blow them right out of the sky!"

Ah, I'm not making it up.
posted by Joe Invisible at 8:02 AM on September 19, 2007

Luke, be a Jedi tonight!
Just be a Jedi tonight!

Do it for Yoda,
While we serve our guests a soda.

Uh, and do it for Chewie and the Ewoks,
and all the other puppets ...

Luke be a Jedi tonight!
posted by thanotopsis at 8:07 AM on September 19, 2007 [3 favorites]

To a tango beat.

Darth: Luke, I am your father!
Luke: Father, I am your Luke!
Darth: Finding you was a bother.
Luke: You're such a wacky kook!
posted by dances_with_sneetches at 9:01 AM on September 19, 2007

Meet me in Tatooine, -ooine,
Meet me at the fair
Don't tell me the pods are racing
Any place but there;
We will dance the Hoochee Koochee,
I will be your tootsie Wookiee,
If you will meet me in Tatooine, -ooine,
Meet me at the fair!
posted by hermitosis at 9:02 AM on September 19, 2007 [1 favorite]

How the hell does a Star Wars musical make it ten years without being mentioned on The Blue?

By virute of the fact that it's not very good. I mean, during the Let's Blow This Thing number, there's no Porkins! That's just unforgiveable, really.

But, of course, according to the site it got a standing ovation at the Florida District III Thespian Festival.

Broadway here they come.
posted by BobFrapples at 9:10 AM on September 19, 2007

Virtue.

I don't come across it often, hence my problem spelling it.
posted by BobFrapples at 9:11 AM on September 19, 2007 [1 favorite]

Star Wars Gangsta Rap

There's a city in the cloud where they keepin my crew
A jedi's gotta do what a jedi's gotta do.
posted by Comrade_robot at 9:14 AM on September 19, 2007

I hate every sith I see,
From Coruscant to Dantooine,
Oh you'll never make a sith lord out of me!

Oh my God, I was wrong!
You were Dad all along!
Oh you finally made a Jedi,
Oh we finally made a Jedi
Oh you finally made a Jedi out of MEEEEEE!
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 9:38 AM on September 19, 2007 [2 favorites]

"Guys and dolls, we're just a bunch of crazy guys and dolls..."
-- Mark Hamill (via The Simpsons)
posted by inigo2 at 9:46 AM on September 19, 2007

So what can you get — a Wookiee for Christmas — when he already owns a comb?
posted by mubba at 10:31 AM on September 19, 2007

Now, if they'd turn my beloved Star Wars Holiday Special into a full-blown stage musical, that'd really be something.
posted by FelliniBlank at 11:42 AM on September 19, 2007

Critics panned it, too much yub yub.
posted by BrotherCaine at 2:06 PM on September 19, 2007 [1 favorite]

My backpacks got jets.

by mc chris
posted by MiltonRandKalman at 6:34 PM on September 19, 2007

tusken raider, tusken raider
oooooooooo, tusken raider

fleetmouse, awesome. a visual aid:

tusken raider, tusken raider
tusken raider, tusken raider
tusken raider, tusken raider
HURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR, tusken raider

and, from the fed-up choreographer: "NO! No no NO! You're dancing side-by-side! Sandpeople always dance single file, to hide their numbers! ...Take it from the top."
posted by unregistered_animagus at 6:37 PM on September 19, 2007 [1 favorite]

I'm Yoda, I'm a souljah

I'll mold ya and fold ya
I thought I told ya

Don't be unwise
Judge me not by my size

You won't believe your eyes
Once the X-Wing rise...
posted by SentientAI at 7:50 PM on September 19, 2007

backseatpilot: I saw the MIT version - the length was due to it covering all three movies and was quite well done (easily 10x the entertainment value of the prequels). Unfortunately it doesn't seem to have made it online and the promised DVD hasn't materialized yet.
posted by adamsc at 9:31 PM on September 19, 2007

The MIT version was indeed incredible. I didn't realize there was a DVD version in the works (or that there was at one point, anyway), but I will *definitely* be buying it if and when it shows up. *Definitely.*
posted by spaceman_spiff at 10:49 PM on September 19, 2007

I can't believe I missed this thread earlier. I did lighting and sound design on "Jedi! A Musical Tour De Force" which played in the mid-90s at the ImprovOlympic (now IO) in Chicago -- or at least it did until Lucas sent us a cease and desist. I need to pull those old songs up, they were fantastic.
posted by davejay at 10:08 PM on October 5, 2007

Oh, and the Jedi! one we did covered all three movies as well, but was only an hour or so.
posted by davejay at 10:09 PM on October 5, 2007

man, that was a great show.
posted by davejay at 10:17 PM on October 5, 2007