They send you a book, you review it.
September 21, 2007 9:58 AM   Subscribe

 
Penguin Books | Penguin Blog
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 9:58 AM on September 21, 2007


"There are currently no books available."

Rats.
posted by jquinby at 10:11 AM on September 21, 2007


Dang it all, that's not "blog a penguin classic" at all; it's "a blog of collected brief reviews of penguin classics". I want people to really blog this shit—an entry every couple chapters, OMG plot-thickening moments, "god I swear I am done with this ridiculous pile of crap and I mean it this time" drama.

I want flickr photos of the coffee they spilled on pages 58 and 59. I want the recipe for burritos they threw together while chowing down before the big final push that night. Updates on how their cat seems to feel about the portions they've read aloud to it.
posted by cortex at 10:23 AM on September 21, 2007 [13 favorites]


"There are currently no books available."

Huh? I could swear that wasn't there when I posted this.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 10:26 AM on September 21, 2007


I would prefer the reviews in LOLPENGUINCLASSIKZ format.
posted by brain_drain at 10:26 AM on September 21, 2007 [1 favorite]


LOLCOMTEDEMONTE-CRISTO:

"i made u a revenj but i overdone it :("

posted by cortex at 10:30 AM on September 21, 2007 [2 favorites]


LOLAUSTENZ: i can has a husband? kthxbai.
posted by jquinby at 10:32 AM on September 21, 2007 [6 favorites]


I would prefer the reviews in LOLPENGUINCLASSIKZ format.
Dorian Gray: I IZ ORPHAN; I HAS INHERITANCE, LOL ^____^
Lord Henry: OMG A/S/L? U Wnat see mai etchins?
Dorian Gray: KK ^___^
(in studio)
Lord Henry:Maybe I paint yuo??
Dorian Gray: KK ^___^
Lord Henry Wotton: YAWN I IZ BORED OF LIEF
Dorian Gray: OMG A/S/L???
Lord Henry Wotton: I CAN HAS HEDONIZM. YUO WANT PAERTY?
Dorian Gray: LOL OMG YAOI CRUSH
Lord Henry: Noooo he be takin my boy! BTW pix iz done
(shows picture)
Dorian Gray: I has mortality??? :(,,,,
Lord Henry: Let's theater!
Dorian: WOO YAY.
Sibyl Vane: SHAKESPEARE SHAKESPEARE SHAKESPEARE
Dorian: OMG A/S/L???
Sibyl: kekeke ^____^
Dorian: Yuo party w/me nwo
Sibyl: SHAKESPEARE SHAKESP-- O NOES IZ ALL LIES <3 DORIAN DORIAN DORIAN
Dorian: OMG tacky SHUNNIN U
Sibyl: blargh, I die.
Dorian: bout time, lol.
Lord Henry: Let's do coke off each other's asses!
Dorian Gray: KK ^___^
(oh god too much time spent on this)
posted by boo_radley at 10:53 AM on September 21, 2007 [19 favorites]


IZ BETTA 2 SUFFR SLINGZ N AIR-Os of OUTRAJUS FORCHUN
posted by drezdn at 10:54 AM on September 21, 2007


OMG HEATHCLIFF SI TEH HOTTIE
posted by Lucinda at 10:56 AM on September 21, 2007


O NOES! PASS TEH HARPOONZ! LOLZ!
posted by brundlefly at 10:59 AM on September 21, 2007 [3 favorites]


STELLA!


INVISIBLE SANITY.
posted by mygothlaundry at 11:05 AM on September 21, 2007 [2 favorites]


VIRGIL: I CAN HAS MUSE!
AENEAS: OH NOEZ! TROY IS SUCK!
VENUS: YOU CAN HAZ ROME!
AENEAS: DIDO DIDO DIDO GOT TO GO
DIDO: BURN!
AENEAS: LAVINIA REBOUND SX PLZ
JUNO: LAVINIA BE GHEY FOR TURNUS!
AENEAS: TURNUS IS GHEY! I STAB!
VIRGIL: I IS DED TEH END!
posted by klangklangston at 11:11 AM on September 21, 2007 [4 favorites]


OMG BRUTUS NOT U2 D00D
posted by languagehat at 11:14 AM on September 21, 2007 [21 favorites]


Lordy, one more.

Alonso: MY QUEST. LET ME SHOW YOU IT.
Sancho: LOL!!1
Windmill: PWNED
posted by jquinby at 11:18 AM on September 21, 2007


LOLBEOWULF: I'M IN UR MEAD-HALL KILLIN UR DANES
posted by brundlefly at 11:20 AM on September 21, 2007 [15 favorites]


Old woman in Candide: CAN I HAS BUTTOK?

Pirates: NOES YOU CAN NOTS HAS BUTTOKS!
posted by COBRA! at 11:27 AM on September 21, 2007 [3 favorites]


humbert2: A/S/L?
loLita: 12/F/NH
humbert2: OMG
posted by brain_drain at 11:28 AM on September 21, 2007 [21 favorites]


Abelard: WHERE MY NADZ?
posted by COBRA! at 11:32 AM on September 21, 2007


Wait, what's wrong with Penguin Classics?
posted by DU at 11:33 AM on September 21, 2007


Odysseus: Time to go home. OH SHI--
posted by boo_radley at 11:49 AM on September 21, 2007


LOLHeartOfDarkness: IN UR AFRIKA, <3'n UR DARKNEZ.
posted by McGuillicuddy at 11:58 AM on September 21, 2007 [8 favorites]


cortex, I'm game. Anyone else want in?
posted by rush at 12:01 PM on September 21, 2007


This book is a Penguin Classic in every sense of the word.
posted by M.C. Lo-Carb! at 12:01 PM on September 21, 2007


PLZSR, I CAN HAS MOAR?
posted by trip and a half at 12:08 PM on September 21, 2007 [1 favorite]


bah. none available.
posted by misanthropicsarah at 12:20 PM on September 21, 2007


LOL1984:

MINITRU: U <3 BIG BRO!!!!
WSMITH: DO NOT WANT
JULIA: INVISIBLE LUV AFFAIR
OBRIEN101: I CAN HAS TORTURE RATS!
WSMITH: O NOES!!!!
OBRIEN101: U <3 BIG BRO?
WSMITH: YA
posted by evisceratordeath at 12:22 PM on September 21, 2007 [2 favorites]


Turn of the Screw:

WHO IS KRAZY? MAYBE ALL IS!
posted by klangklangston at 12:34 PM on September 21, 2007


SWIFT: O HAI! LETZ EAT TEH BAB1EZ. HAHA! JK. KTHXBAI.
posted by jefbla at 12:37 PM on September 21, 2007 [3 favorites]


Not to ruin lolfun here, but did I really miss the boat on being able to sign up that quickly?
posted by Rarebit Fiend at 12:44 PM on September 21, 2007


JUDE THE OBSCURE: BECUZ WE IS 2 MINI KBAI
posted by bovious at 12:45 PM on September 21, 2007


LOLTHREEMENINABOAT: WE GOES IN BOAT! OH NOES WE FORGETS CAN OPENER etc

sorry, I'm not very good at writing like that
posted by Grod at 1:23 PM on September 21, 2007


man, I hated Jude the Obscure.
posted by boo_radley at 1:35 PM on September 21, 2007


This thread deserves a FPP linking to it, since it's far better than it's own FPP.
Too meta even for metafilter?
posted by dosterm at 1:40 PM on September 21, 2007


LOLKEROUAC: I can haz gai? I can has drugz? I'm in ur fire tower, hosing ur worldview

LOLF.SCOTT:

omg so like the 1st part of summer vacay was sooooo dull, but still its betterthan Minnesota, amirite? So 2day I went to my cousin Daisy's hosue she lives in a tewtally pimp mansion & she hooked me up w/ her firend Jordan. then we all ditched Daisy's , this dude next door was havin a party and it was off the chizzain, there was so much Cristal and even a bit of sumpin sumpin upstairs uknowwatimsayin. the dude is called Nick & he rolls so phat. he's havin another party 2morrow, and then this wknd were all going to NYC. ROAD TRIP!!!!!!! Sweeeeeet... this is gonna be BEST SUMMER EVER.

peace out, y'all
Nick
posted by pineapple at 1:43 PM on September 21, 2007


(ARGH!!!! the dude is called TOM. He is called TOMMMMMM!!! it's too hard to write teenblog.)
posted by pineapple at 1:44 PM on September 21, 2007


Alright alright.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 1:46 PM on September 21, 2007


Handily pwn3d, gnfti.
posted by cortex at 1:51 PM on September 21, 2007


One day...
posted by djgh at 2:27 PM on September 21, 2007


The site has been up and running since at least mid-August, so I'm not surprised all the books have gone.

I got the Selected Writings of Thomas Aquinas (they only send you the title of your book in the email response, so it was a mystery until it arrived) and thanks to this thread I will be unable to review it without thinking up some LOLAQUINAS.
posted by penguinliz at 2:43 PM on September 21, 2007 [1 favorite]


The Stranger: I CANS SHOOT ARAB?
Lawyer: NO YOU NO KANS SHOOT ARAB IF YOU NO CRY FOR YOUR MOM!!!! LOL!
posted by Citizen Premier at 2:43 PM on September 21, 2007


"I got the Selected Writings of Thomas Aquinas (they only send you the title of your book in the email response, so it was a mystery until it arrived) and thanks to this thread I will be unable to review it without thinking up some LOLAQUINAS."

I CAN HAZ REVOLASHUNZ!
posted by klangklangston at 3:11 PM on September 21, 2007


JESUS CHRIST IT'S A WHITE WHALE, GET IN THE BOAT
posted by monju_bosatsu at 3:22 PM on September 21, 2007 [3 favorites]


Given that each copy of a book probably only costs Penguin a few cents (and they probably have piles of the things sitting around in a warehouse somewhere), this is a pretty brilliant idea on their part.

For the cost of a little postage (and what does sending out a paperback cost by Media Mail, anyway? less than a dollar, I think) they get someone to read and talk about one of their books. On a larger scale, it gets people with some sort of influence in their target market writing and thinking about classic books, and since they're a major source of them, that's nothing but good.

Personally, I think it's great; since I'm basically incapable of holding a conversation about videogames, and only limited ones about technology, more talk about old books on the Internet is fine by me.
posted by Kadin2048 at 3:24 PM on September 21, 2007


Man, I was psyched to blog a free book I had not read. Now I am reduced to:

3TH4N FR0MM3: WHEEE! (THUDZ.)
posted by steef at 3:43 PM on September 21, 2007 [4 favorites]


We don't feel like promoting our line of books. Here, internet, you do it!
posted by maus at 6:28 PM on September 21, 2007


Neat idea in theory, but seems kind of thrown together (they don't even put the author's names on the list of reviews so you just have "The Complete Poems," e.g., with no author mention). And boy, the quality of the reviews I just read leaves a lot to be desired.
posted by mediareport at 6:56 PM on September 21, 2007


DED S0LZ:

WASSUP?
SEЯFS UP
NYET, SEЯFS Я DED
ORLY: INVISIBLE TAXPAYEЯZ?
YA, --> $$
NYET D00D, ЯUBLES
KTHX, DO SVIDANYA
posted by rob511 at 7:54 PM on September 21, 2007


Here's your LOLAQUINAS.
posted by jstruan at 8:26 PM on September 21, 2007


Sorry to break up the whole LOLZ thang... but this is the review of The Last Tycoon:

"’Now, people, we have this script by some Fitzgerald. First time I had heard about the chap. “The Last Tycoon” is the title. Think it must be some documentary? No way, mate. Thing is, that the man went to Hollywood and peeped in some hole into the studios and film-making industry. By the way, send the janitors for a tour around the walls; I want that hole stuffed in. Nno more peeping while I’m in here. They will find it alright, the hole must be an enormous one, Fitzgerald saw everything.

‘I figure he must have been some pal of that Monroe Stahr, if he put him into his book. Poor, dear Monroe . I remember him as an office boy, and then he became The Producer. Man, he was a boy wonder, I say. The “pictures” was his life, he practically lived here, he had everything under control. Or almost everything. Oh, dear.

‘Now, people, how about this script? It sounds promising. Though, that Fitzgerald man did not have the chance to finish it. His bad. We have his notes, at least. The book is too good to be not to shown and it is too true to be shown. What shall we do about it now?"


Sorry, but some people should not even be writing reviews for free. Daaaaaamn.
posted by miss lynnster at 9:05 PM on September 21, 2007


I'll give a big kiss on the cheek to whomever can do a LOL version of Ulysses.

The best I can come up with is LOLULYSSES: WTF?!
posted by brundlefly at 1:50 AM on September 22, 2007 [1 favorite]


LOLKAREENINA

I CAN HAS LUV VRONSKY?

NO, KTHXBAI.

HAI TRAINZ!
posted by oxford blue at 6:19 AM on September 22, 2007 [1 favorite]


Since we're doing LOLTOLST0YZ:

NAPOLEON BONER PARTZ IN UR RUSSIA KICKIN UR A$$
I CAN HAS TEH WRONG MENS PLZ
LOLMOSCOWBBQ
OMFG ITS COLD
I CAN HAS RIGHT MENS AND ALSO BABYS THX
posted by Pallas Athena at 8:48 AM on September 22, 2007 [1 favorite]


Philleas Fogg: OMG, I CAN HAS INVISIBLE DAY!
posted by the cydonian at 9:19 AM on September 22, 2007 [1 favorite]


LOLULYSSES: I HAZ A DAY
posted by drezdn at 7:22 AM on September 24, 2007


Haha. We think muchly alike drezdn—I was going to post the same thing.
posted by oxford blue at 7:39 PM on September 24, 2007


Yesterday at work I started writing the following:

I

STAETLY, PLUMP BUK MULLIGAN HOLDS ALOFT HIS BOLE.

BUK: IS MAH BOLE. WAEK UP NOW PLZ

STEHPEN DEDALUS: OK FAT MAN

BUK: HEY YO MAMA

STEHPEN: IZ DEAD, NOT FUNNY

BUK: BEASTLY DEAD LOL

----

STEHPEN: HAY GUYZ IM IN UR CLAS POSING UR RIDDEL

CLAS: DO NOT WANT

STEHPEN: GOD IZ A SHOUT IN THE STREET

MR DAESY: YOU SUCK

STEHPEN: SHUT UP NAZI I CAN HAZ MONEY NOW

----

STEHPEN: CONSTRANSMAGNIFICANDJEWBANGTANTIALITEE

STEHPEN: LOL I CAN HAZ DICTIONARY NOW? NO WONDER IM LOENLY. I WANT GO PIS NOW.


II

BLOOM: NUM NUM NUM

CAT: MRKGNAO

BLOOM: POOP POOP

----

MARTHA: OH HENRY

----


Then I kind of realized what I was doing and decided to make myself productive.

Feel free to continue it though.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 5:23 PM on September 25, 2007


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