Canadian border guards gone wild

October 2, 2007 11:28 AM

Facebook and MySpace posts embarrass Canadian border guards. PDF. Another example of Jan Wong's advice in 15 minutes of shame, about a 2005 incident at a Toronto private school: Don't write anything you wouldn't want someone to forward to [the national newspaper].
posted by russilwvong (50 comments total)

Wow, Hughes sounds like a disgruntled douchebag.

When I read the story, I thought, well, compared to the jackbooted morons that the US hires, this is another "Good on ya, Canada" moment.
posted by klangklangston at 11:38 AM on October 2, 2007

Give the Canadian border guards a break. Across the border from Jackman ME they have a very nice customs station, and they let me into Canada even though every single answer I gave them was incorrect, except for my name.

Best part of my entrance interview:

Customs: Have you ever been questioned by Canadian border authorities?

Me: I don't know. Am I being questioned now?

Customs: No.

Me: Then I guess not.
posted by rusty at 11:40 AM on October 2, 2007 [3 favorites]

I dunno, some of the pics were kinda hot.
posted by desjardins at 11:47 AM on October 2, 2007

Yep... they did something stupid. Like student trainees have never gotten together to party at any previous time in the entire history of Man.

But this is also getting out of hand. Check that CBC story -- since when is giving a smiley-face balloon a hickey a "daring pose"? And one person -- one person -- made a disparaging comment about the Prime Minister. Hardly a brushload of tar with which to blacken the entire Service.

I got blind drunk a few times at University. And I can think of more than one occasion when its publicity would be profoundly embarrassing. Now granted I don't pack a pistol as part of my job, but I most certainly was a whole lot more responsible from Day 1 when I put on my suit and went to work. Dear CBC: most people separate work and play.

The coverage of this story seems to suggest that Canada's borders are about to become populated with freshly graduated gun-toting out-of-control yahoos. [ Oh man, there is such an opening here for a comment about the other side of the border... but I'm SO not going there! :-) ]

The moral here is leave the e-cameras at home when you party. Or at the very least, keep your damned fingers off the "Upload to website" command.
posted by Mike D at 11:48 AM on October 2, 2007

Wow, Hughes sounds like a disgruntled douchebag.

Sounds to me like he has good reason to be disgruntled. But, to be fair, he says he went to the government several times with no response, and took this public in the press only as a last resort.
posted by rocket88 at 11:49 AM on October 2, 2007 [1 favorite]

Yay Jan Wong. Crazy person, great journalist.

In other news, Facebook considered dangerous. Shocked, appaled, etc.
posted by GuyZero at 11:52 AM on October 2, 2007

Wow, I wonder what they would think about some of the stuff on my MySpace account. (It's private, so don't bother trying to find it).
posted by tadellin at 11:56 AM on October 2, 2007

This is the kind of thing that happens when make the mistake of not being at war.
posted by srboisvert at 12:00 PM on October 2, 2007

...since when is giving a smiley-face balloon a hickey a "daring pose"?

I think you should look a little closer at that pic.

Not that I think taking dumb pictures of yourself is a shooting offense.
posted by DU at 12:03 PM on October 2, 2007

In other news, cops are just like regular people, but with guns, aggression problems, and the power to arrest you.
posted by dead_ at 12:04 PM on October 2, 2007

Me entering Canada in 2005: border guard asks for identification, asks purpose of visit, how long I'm staying, where I'm staying, whether I have any alcohol, tobacco, or firearms with me.

Me entering Canada in 2006: border guard asks for identification, asks purpose of visit, how long I'm staying, where I'm staying, whether I have any alcohol, tobacco, or firearms with me.

Me entering Canada in 2007: border guard does not ask for identification, does ask purpose of visit, how long I'm staying, where I'm staying, whether I have any alcohol or tobacco - but not firearms - with me.
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 12:07 PM on October 2, 2007 [2 favorites]

He's just pissed because they didn't invite him.
posted by IronLizard at 12:07 PM on October 2, 2007

No jokes or statements

"Sir, did you pack this bag?" "Did I!?"
"Are you carrying any controlled substances?" "Would you believe I'm not?!"
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 12:08 PM on October 2, 2007 [1 favorite]

Sure, they party, but are they too proud of their own poo??

"16 different types of turd." Talk about a plate of beans...
posted by LordSludge at 12:17 PM on October 2, 2007

http://youtube.com/watch?v=DFcIH2tK2iM

Not strictly applicable, but I couldn't resist.
posted by scarylarry at 12:18 PM on October 2, 2007

I bet dectectives didn't think their biggest competition would be social networking services.
posted by Citizen Premier at 12:21 PM on October 2, 2007

This is going to get very interesting in 20 years or so. Eventually, we might have trouble finding a political candidate who doesn't have pictures of herself imbibing alcohol and engaging in "daring poses" online.

I wonder when we'll have to start admitting that a lot of this stuff just isn't a big deal.
posted by ODiV at 12:33 PM on October 2, 2007 [5 favorites]

Oh my god, people drink and have fun. I'm HORRIFIED!!!

Lusiana student caught mocking the Jenna 6 in blackface, on facebook. (via fark, of all places) Seems a bit worse.

Now that so much of what we do is public, people are just going to have to adjust their standards as to what's acceptable.
posted by delmoi at 12:34 PM on October 2, 2007

The "Canadians are polite" thing is a total myth. Canadians are not more polite then Americans, unless you're talking about like New Yorkers or something.
posted by delmoi at 12:36 PM on October 2, 2007

Flying back from Canada the other week I asked if I needed to take my shoes off going through the checkpoint they just laughed politely at me and said "no, no". Going through Newark (I really dislike that airport) TSA decided to check my camera bag which involved yelling at top volume for a supervisor five or six times while little old laddies behind me started looking at me like I really wanted to blow them and their microyap doggies to kingdom come. As often as I've crossed the boarder literally 90% of all the hassles I've encountered have been on the south side.
posted by edgeways at 12:51 PM on October 2, 2007

The "Canadians are polite" thing is a total myth.

Fuck you delmoi. We're as polite as shit-coated fuck.
posted by GuyZero at 12:57 PM on October 2, 2007 [1 favorite]

Wow, I wonder what they would think about some of the stuff on my MySpace account. (It's private, so don't bother trying to find it).

Your MeFi history is shocking enough.
posted by Pope Guilty at 12:58 PM on October 2, 2007

The attempted Americanization of Canada continues.

Canada yawns.

Video to follow.
posted by humannaire at 1:09 PM on October 2, 2007

Dear Canada,

I hear you're Eh Ok. Mind if I come over there to visit live for a while forever? I can knit you all hats!

-CBM

P.S. I really like the Mike Myers and Feist you sent over. Thanks again for sharing.
posted by cowbellemoo at 1:09 PM on October 2, 2007 [1 favorite]

I do like the Canadian government's response. 'The problem isn't that our new border guards are a bunch of undereducated kids, the problem is social networking sites.'
posted by 1adam12 at 1:18 PM on October 2, 2007 [1 favorite]

Man, I don't see why we didn't invade Canada. These yahoos certainly couldn't implement any kind of insurgency let alone stop the 82nd. Well, maybe it's not too late yet. I hope somebody has notified Cheney about what passes for border protection in Canada.
posted by nixerman at 1:20 PM on October 2, 2007

Pope Guilty: My history is only shocking to liberals, the conservative Metafilter users have no problem with it.

Which is funny, because aren't conservatives supposed to be shocked by liberal behavior? :)
posted by tadellin at 1:45 PM on October 2, 2007

Wait, they can't identify Dutch passports? Does this mean that I would be better at defending Canada's borders than some of these students? (I bet most Canadians wouldn't think so, because I'm American, and Harper/Day wouldn't think so, because I'm not weapons-trained.)

Generally, if you're entering Canada from the U.S., you're probably not a danger, because the U.S. has likely already grilled you if you're remotely suspicious-looking (though I have had weird questions asked of me by agents on both sides of the border).

Eventually, we might have trouble finding a political candidate who doesn't have pictures of herself imbibing alcohol and engaging in "daring poses" online.

It's going to be so much fun when my college classmates run for office. So much fun.
posted by oaf at 1:55 PM on October 2, 2007

Sigh. When will all these people realize that facebook is the absolute farthest thing from private and friendly? If you wouldn't show something to your boss, don't put it on facebook. If you wouldn't say something to your grandmother, don't put it on facebook.

That said, there are a lot of douchebags who fly around parties taking pictures of every single person there in whatever compromising situation and plastering them all over their public facebook accounts. I've had to untag many pictures of me drunk, or holding a joint or bong. I think I'll just avoid cameras altogether at social gatherings from now on. Some people really can't make the distinction between public and private.
posted by tehloki at 2:03 PM on October 2, 2007

Oh, Canada...
posted by PostIronyIsNotaMyth at 2:07 PM on October 2, 2007

Hughes is an ass. I've met, and partied with, thank you very much, people who work in Canadian law enforcement, and not only are they a blast to have a beer with, they're impeccably professional without being pointlessly absorbed in the letter of the law.

I want Canadian border guards to be relaxed enough that they're having a few beers after hours at the training facility. We're not at war with the US. And double happy face girl is totally fine in my books.

The problem, here, is that some fuck decided to forward facebook photos to CBC. Facebook has lots and lots of privacy settings so this sort of thing shouldn't happen much, and you generally know who you're letting see your pictures... but I guess Hughes decided those kids were having way too much fun without him.

Hughes and his former colleague, Levan Turner, both in their 40s, worked summers at the border until the government decided not to hire them permanently.

Sorry, guy. Move on.
posted by blacklite at 2:11 PM on October 2, 2007

The "Canadians are polite" thing is a total myth. Canadians are not more polite then Americans, unless you're talking about like New Yorkers or something.

In the face of everyone else's consensus on the issue perhaps you should start to wonder why your experience is different.
posted by srboisvert at 2:11 PM on October 2, 2007 [1 favorite]

Man, I don't see why we didn't invade Canada.

You did. Or at least tried. And got the Whitehouse burned down as a result. :-)

_{Seriously, if it wasn't for American aggression in 1812, Canada would've likely been absorbed by the U.S.}
posted by illiad at 2:17 PM on October 2, 2007

You did. Or at least tried. And got the Whitehouse burned down as a result. :-)

Note that we'd already burned down Toronto at that point.
posted by oaf at 2:27 PM on October 2, 2007

(And before the pedants chime in, yes, I know it was York still.)
posted by oaf at 2:28 PM on October 2, 2007

we'd already burned down Toronto at that point.

Once again, bringing democracy to the unwashed masses.
posted by blacklite at 2:41 PM on October 2, 2007

Well, they seemed to get the concept better than we have.
posted by Kadin2048 at 3:06 PM on October 2, 2007 [1 favorite]

When you export democracy, what's left to import but fear and softwood lumber?
posted by tehloki at 3:23 PM on October 2, 2007

'I don't have a gun... YET!!! You will be the first one to hear about it when serial killer Harper gives me one.'
—A female border guard from B.C.

I'm very much enjoying Stockwell Day being put in the position of defending a border crossing guard calling his boss a serial killer. Between this and Dalton McGuinty as reptilian kitten-eater, you'd think nothing at all serious or important happened in Canadian politics.

P.S. I am perfectly fine with "serial killer Harper" woman and her cohorts handling firearms and protecting our borders. Perhaps I would like them to take some courses on spotting fake passports, though.
posted by chrominance at 3:39 PM on October 2, 2007 [1 favorite]

Once again, bringing democracy to the unwashed masses.

Once again, pretending to be significantly different.
posted by oaf at 3:50 PM on October 2, 2007

Perhaps I would like them to take some courses on spotting fake passports, though.

Hint: Kreblakistan is not a country.
posted by oaf at 3:50 PM on October 2, 2007

This is why whenever I party publicly I wear a mask. This accomplishes two useful things: 1.) I never get recognized and if photographed, I've got deniablity. And 2.) everybody else at the party feels like they've been drinking with Zorro, and that's all kinds of awesome.
posted by quin at 5:04 PM on October 2, 2007 [2 favorites]

Except that if you do that in Canada, everyone else thinks they've been drinking with Jason.
posted by pompomtom at 6:07 PM on October 2, 2007

It's not necessarily the fact that the recruits are partying, but there have been photos from facebook sent to the press (not in the CBC article, it seems) that show them drinking heavily while in their uniform. That is a huuuge no no.
posted by aclevername at 6:40 PM on October 2, 2007

Dude, Zorro wears a nice little fabric mask, covers basically just his upper face. Doesn't look a bit like Jason.
posted by five fresh fish at 6:50 PM on October 2, 2007

I have looked at that picture again, DU, and I have no idea what you are on about. Are you suggesting that those smiley face balloons are in fact that woman's breasts? Because I don't think they really are her breasts. I think they are just balloons. Please to point out the daring. I am missing it.
posted by motty at 8:00 PM on October 2, 2007

The balloons, they might pop. How daring!
posted by five fresh fish at 8:20 PM on October 2, 2007

I just always find it unsettling when people who have access to guns and/or are in positions of power show stunningly bad judgment.

Having a few beers - sure, have fun - great. But if you are an officer, fetishizing your weapon, insulting the people you are supposed to be protecting, joking about 'feeling like arresting/killing someone', joking about rape, (why exactly is that funny again?).... Perhaps people who believe that individuals can compartmentalize this immaturity (they were blowing off steam, they didn't mean it, etc.) and step up to the plate when it matters are right - but it would help to have some evidence to support this.

All in all, I imagine having to interact with these folks is somewhat like being an ER patient with one of the new medical residents in July - regardless of how candy-ass they've been behaving in the lounge, you're just really rooting for them to pull their sh*t together and get it right when the moment calls for it. But not hearing them joke about killing a patient would increase the confidence.
posted by anitanita at 12:08 AM on October 3, 2007

You did. Or at least tried. And got the Whitehouse burned down as a result. :-)

Note that we'd already burned down Toronto at that point.

Dude you're so right - the ROC (Rest of Canada) never really thanked you enough for that!

We're up for a repeat though!

(I kid, I kid)
posted by lirio at 10:49 AM on October 3, 2007

There is some privacy that you can control, namely things you do on your own in the privacy of your own home. Unless you're Paris Hilton, of course...
posted by fe2dell at 10:37 AM on October 4, 2007