Your tax dollars at work.
February 7, 2008 1:52 PM   Subscribe

Interested on how the gummint is using Spectral Sensing Technology do defend us from attacks? You'll feel much safer after viewing the Futuristic Sensor System Dramatic Research Presentation of the 2008 International Symposium on Spectral Sensing Research (ISSSR-2008). (The tour of the Conference Site is in the same vein, with different music.)
posted by Wet Spot (25 comments total)

What. The. Fuck?
posted by ZenMasterThis at 1:58 PM on February 7, 2008

I'm happy to see that they're not splurging on the marketing budget.
posted by retronic at 1:58 PM on February 7, 2008 [1 favorite]

I refuse to believe that that's real.
posted by awesomebrad at 2:00 PM on February 7, 2008

So...a flying bug cop thing is going to save us from (circa 1995) videogame characters? How is this science?
posted by The Light Fantastic at 2:04 PM on February 7, 2008

Ahh yes, the wonderful world of DOD-funded research.

You run into some real hacks, but remember, they did give us the internet.
posted by mr_roboto at 2:09 PM on February 7, 2008 [1 favorite]

Brought to you by the design efforts of George Hardie in conjunction with the Hanso Foundation!
posted by tkchrist at 2:38 PM on February 7, 2008

Wonder if Prof. Nagib Callaos is involved.
posted by rlk at 2:40 PM on February 7, 2008

First remote viewing, now sensing spectres. What will they think of next?
posted by Crabby Appleton at 3:16 PM on February 7, 2008

I like how the use of "gummint" assures me that this will be a collection of serious, useful links submitted by a thoughtful, articulate user.
posted by Banky_Edwards at 3:18 PM on February 7, 2008 [1 favorite]

The musical score won me at the giant prism floating over the barren landscape.
posted by Atreides at 3:20 PM on February 7, 2008 [1 favorite]

Is the prism thingy ripped off from the cover of Dark Side of the Moon?
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 3:47 PM on February 7, 2008

~10 years ago I was working on a Carrier Command clone and fell into this rabbit hole, but on the simulation level. It was immensely intellectually challenging (and fun!) identifying the core properties of a "sensor", and what the act of "sensing" involves, on the modelling level.

Eg. reflection/refraction/occlusion/emission EM spectrum signatures of objects in the simulation and sensors applying this signature to identify aircraft flying above it in the daytime sky by detecting the target object's occlusion of UV backscatter, literally the hole in the sky the object is making.
posted by panamax at 3:51 PM on February 7, 2008

They missed their chance to add Thus Spake Zarathustra to the score.
posted by Krrrlson at 3:52 PM on February 7, 2008

This is the timecube of DOD-funded research, isn't it?
posted by dersins at 3:54 PM on February 7, 2008 [1 favorite]

I refuse to believe that wasn't made by someone from b3ta
posted by blag at 4:22 PM on February 7, 2008

I kept waiting for the green glowy-disappeary text to say


but how much can you expect from a conference that's going to be held in Hoboken, New Jersey
posted by Muddler at 4:29 PM on February 7, 2008

If you let the terrerists SET US UP THE BOMB, then ALL OUR BASE WILL BELONG TO THEM!
posted by Balisong at 5:00 PM on February 7, 2008

I can't believe the RIAA isn't going to issue a take-down notice; I really doubt anyone paid for the use of the commercial songs in the presentation.

I also thought it was odd that this advanced detection system didn't spot threats until they were actually operational - what ever happened to customs and intelligence and widespread sensors at street level?

In short - not reassuring at all.
posted by WestCoaster at 6:35 PM on February 7, 2008

Makes me think of the DARPA iXo Artificial Intelligence Control Grid video.
posted by jjwiseman at 7:08 PM on February 7, 2008

I love that it searches for a threat, finds a chemical release, and then just keeps on looking for new threats.

The worst part is that apparently all these threats went undetected until 2050...long after the terrorists had killed off all the speech synthesis researchers and interface designers.
posted by eatyourlunch at 7:27 PM on February 7, 2008

Just a small point - after being blown out of the sky, would not the helicopter and radioactive material cause as much damage, after plummeting to the crowded streets below, as going straight into the Empire State Building. Apart from that I'm going to sleep a lot easier in my bed at night.
posted by kingzog at 8:57 PM on February 7, 2008

OK, I held on for a bit. They're fedgeeks, they have an awesomely quaint design sense, it's just how it is with that crew.

Then they had to bust out the Hamburglar...dropping chemicals into New York's water. I REPEAT, THEY GAVE THE HAMBURGLAR CHEMICAL WEAPONRY WTF

Between that, and the Bravo. Oww.
posted by effugas at 9:19 PM on February 7, 2008

So, like, Doctor Who had a kid with Monty Python and they dipped it in nuclear waste and hysteria?

aka, I got nothin'
posted by ryoshu at 10:11 PM on February 7, 2008

effugas writes "They're fedgeeks, they have an awesomely quaint design sense, it's just how it is with that crew."

Heh. Fedgeeks. That's perfect.

They probably do their real work pretty well.
posted by mr_roboto at 11:23 PM on February 7, 2008

What ZenMasterThis said is worth repeating.

What? The? Fuck?
posted by sfts2 at 6:08 AM on February 8, 2008

« Older Exploration Baltimore   |   CringeFilter Newer »

This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments