Dancing Queens

March 6, 2008 4:14 PM

The Gayest Songs of All Time. To celebrate the 30th Anniversary of Sydney's Gay & Lesbian Mardi Gras, the Australian LGBT social networking site SameSame asked its members to vote on the campest of classics.

50-21, 20-16, 15-11, 10-9, 8-7, 6-5, 4-3, 2 and #1.

posted by crossoverman (101 comments total)

No Melissa Etheridge?
posted by arcticwoman at 4:22 PM on March 6

They left out Aretha Franklin's

"I Ain't Never Loved A Man (The Way That I Love You)"

The unofficial theme song of the Dinah Shore Golf Tournament!
posted by jfwlucy at 4:28 PM on March 6

Gee, I like most of these songs. A lot. And I'm not even remotely gay. Am I? In any case, these people know nothing about gay music. What about entire ouvres of Noel Coward Cole Porter? What about Tchaikovsky's Piano Concerto Number One? What about Gregorian Chant? That's gay.
posted by Faze at 4:29 PM on March 6 [2 favorites]

Putting just a couple of entries per page with each page opening in a new window almost made me homophobic.
posted by sourwookie at 4:30 PM on March 6 [5 favorites]

What? No mention of homophony ?
posted by flapjax at midnite at 4:33 PM on March 6

[Halford/Tipton/Downing]
Never straight and narrow
I won't keep in time
Tend to burn the arrow
Out of the line

Been inclined to wander
Off the beaten track
That's where there's thunder
And the wind shouts back

Grinder
Looking for meat
Grinder
Wants you to eat
posted by Wolfdog at 4:34 PM on March 6 [1 favorite]

Holy crap! Alicia Bridges is white? Who knew? No "It's Rainin' Men?" No muppets songs about rainbows? Anyway, gay music is a big load of hooey, isn't it? I mean, I know lots of straight people who love all those songs, and lots of gay people who would fain listen to them. But if it makes the people happy, 'saw-ight.
posted by DenOfSizer at 4:40 PM on March 6

Yeah, these are maybe the most popular songs played on pride floats, but are far from the absolute gayest of the gay.

I mean, Menergy is the gayest song I own, off the top of my head, and it's at least 30% gayer than the top 20.
posted by klangklangston at 4:41 PM on March 6 [1 favorite]

Wait a minute... no Macho Man? What gives?
posted by squirrel at 4:42 PM on March 6

Holy crap, I'd never seen the music video for "Go West" before. The Homosexual Gestapo goose-stepping through New York City? YES PLEASE!
posted by schroedinger at 4:44 PM on March 6

No "It's Rainin' Men?"

That's # 4 on the list.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 4:46 PM on March 6

"It's Rainin' Men" is in there -- you just have to wade through the idiotic navigation and scroll down . . .
posted by jfwlucy at 4:46 PM on March 6

Too annoyed to make my way through rest of the "two song at a time" interface...can someone with more patience just tell me if this or this made the list?
posted by squasha at 4:48 PM on March 6

DenOfSizer: No "It's Rainin' Men?"
So you didn't read the whole list, or what?

May I nominate Cheap Trick's "Stiff Competition"? Oh, and Rough Trade's (the band, not the label) entire discography?
posted by Sys Rq at 4:48 PM on March 6

I'm not wading through all that when I already know where the gay is.
posted by Bookhouse at 4:49 PM on March 6

Some of those are not even gay, they're just disco; the two are not synonymous. I think to make up for genre-bias, they should at least swap Gloria Gaynor for, oh.. say Judas Priest - Ram It Down.
posted by p3t3 at 4:53 PM on March 6

So you don't have to navigate your way through all the pages... or bitch about doing it:

50. Elton John and George Michael “Don’t Let The Sun Go Down On Me”
49. Dead or Alive “You Spin Me (Like A Record)”
48. Pet Shop Boys “New York City Boy”
47. Diana Ross “Chain Reaction”
46. Deborah Harry “I Want That Man”
45. Cher “Strong Enough”
44. RuPaul “Supermodel (You Better Work)”
43. KD Lang “Constant Craving”
42. Culture Club “Do You Really Want To Hurt Me”
41. Chaka Kham “I’m Every Woman”
40. Wham “Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go”
39. Paul Lekakis “Boom Boom (Let’s Go Back To My Room)
38. Kym Mazelle “Young Hearts Run Free”
37. George Michael “Outside”
36. Donna Summer “I Feel Love”
35. Dannii Minogue “This Is It”
34. Belinda Carlisle “Summer Rain”
33. Peter Allen “I Go To Rio”
32. Sylvester “You Make Me Feel Mighty Real”
31. Heather Small “Proud”
30. CeCe Peniston “Finally”
29. Madonna “Express Yourself”
28. Cyndi Lauper “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun”
27. Charlene “I’ve Never Been To Me”
26. Tim Curry “Sweet Transvestite”
25. Barry Manilow “Copacabana”
24. Barbara Streisand and Donna Summer “No More Tears”
23. Whitney Houston “I Wanna Dance With Somebody (Who Loves Me)”
22. Sister Sledge “We Are Family”
21. Queen “I Want To Break Free”
20. Dolly Parton “9 to 5”
19. Coming Out Crew “Free, Gay and Happy”
18. Village People “In the Navy”
17. Frankie Goes To Hollywood “Relax”
16. Village People “Macho Man”
15. Judy Garland “Over The Rainbow”
14. Bronski Beat “Smalltown Boy”
13. Diana Ross “I’m Coming Out”
12. Cher “Believe”
11. Gloria Gaynor “I Am What I Am”
10. Alicia Bridges “I Love The Nightlife”
9. Madonna “Vogue”
8. Olivia Netwon-John “Xanadu”
7. Kylie Minogue “Better The Devil You Know”
6. Pet Shop Boys “Go West”
5. Kylie Minogue “Your Disco Needs You”
4. The Weathergirls “It’s Raining Men”
3. Gloria Gaynor “I Will Survive”
2. Village People “YMCA”
1. ABBA “Dancing Queen”
posted by crossoverman at 4:56 PM on March 6 [8 favorites]

lawdy, Bookhouse, that Erasure clip sent me reeling down memory lane to The Stud and The G-Spot nightclubs in SF. Good times. Ancient times.
posted by squasha at 4:57 PM on March 6

Mambo 69.
I recall someone posting a bunch of camp songs in the blue a while ago, and I hum along to one constantly when I'm working: "Where are those good old fashioned balls of yesteryear..."
It's good fun that tends to distract my coworkers in unexpected ways.
posted by boo_radley at 4:58 PM on March 6

You know how I know you're gay? You listen to Coldpl....err.... ABBA.
posted by clearly at 4:59 PM on March 6

(thanks, crossoverman...glad to see Ru made the list, even if said list has an overall Sydney-centric slant.)
posted by squasha at 5:00 PM on March 6

You know how I know you're gay? You listen to Coldpl....err.... ABBA.
posted by clearly at 4:59 PM on March 6 [+] [!]

The ABBA Box says I have the murder gene in me. Best watch your mouth!
posted by basicchannel at 5:07 PM on March 6

Bookhouse, that Erasure video made me so so happy. I haven't heard that song for ages!

I think it should be tied with "Dancing Queen" for number one.

*starts compiling playlist*
posted by hurdy gurdy girl at 5:08 PM on March 6

What, no Rolling Stones?
posted by Tube at 5:12 PM on March 6

39. Paul Lekakis “Boom Boom (Let’s Go Back To My Room)

Never heard it before, so I was compelled to check youtube... *gag*. The Vengaboys' take on the boom-boom room phenomenon is much better than that.

That guy's intro bit reminds me of Bananarama.
posted by CKmtl at 5:15 PM on March 6

Chaka Khan for goodness sake. They don't make video clips like this any more. The hair the outfits and the moves, all wrapped up in a special effects extravaganza.
posted by tellurian at 5:16 PM on March 6

Wait a minute... no Macho Man? What gives?
posted by squirrel at 11:42 PM
it's #16.

No "It's Rainin' Men?" posted by DenOfSizer at 11:40 PM
It's #4.

You actually typed & posted without reading? Like, you gambled, right?

How embarrassing.

Thanks for the complete list, crossoverman - that was surely some awful webdesign.
posted by dash_slot- at 5:19 PM on March 6

More 'top 50 songs played at rubbish gay clubs' than 'gayest songs of all time', really. Not that there aren't some absolute gems in there.
posted by jack_mo at 5:23 PM on March 6

Thanks for the complete list, crossoverman - that was surely some awful webdesign.

Online "Top" and "Best Of" lists have got into this habit of splitting the lists over multiple pages. This is a peculiar example of not even being consistent with the number of entries on each page! Still, a fun list.

Never heard it before, so I was compelled to check youtube... *gag*.

Ah, the 80s... good times, good times.
posted by crossoverman at 5:25 PM on March 6

The Vengaboys got snubbed.

DA DA DA DA DA DADA DA DA DA DA DA DADA.
posted by clearly at 5:26 PM on March 6 [1 favorite]

I mean, Menergy is the gayest song I own

I'm with klangklangston. Menergy defined a whole new genre of Disco -- Hi-NRG, which was made specifically for the gay market. Also, why no Miquel Brown, So Many Men, So Little Time or Valentino, I was born this way. Can't find Valentino's original, but here's Carl Bean's Cover.

Also, Clivilles and Cole, (Pride) A Deeper Love belongs up there too.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 5:30 PM on March 6

No Pansy Division?
posted by The corpse in the library at 5:33 PM on March 6

"Go West," hooray! More evidence for the proposition that there are very few good songs that can't be made even better by the inclusion of a men's chorus or a marching band.
posted by FelliniBlank at 5:45 PM on March 6

No Right Said Fred? Come on. I'm Too Sexy for My Shirt is SO GAY!
posted by rtha at 5:51 PM on March 6

This list is totally incomplete without "I'm Coming Out" by Diana Ross!
posted by ramix at 5:53 PM on March 6

No "Everybody Dance Now"? You mean the Simpsons lied to me?
posted by PlusDistance at 5:54 PM on March 6

Ok never mind...shoot me now!
posted by ramix at 5:54 PM on March 6

I'm sorry. (NSFW?)
posted by Bookhouse at 6:01 PM on March 6

Egad! No 'You Turn Me On'? No 'Sally Go Round the Roses'?

Kids today. No respect.
posted by Kinbote at 6:02 PM on March 6

rtha is dead-on, "I'm Too Sexy" *clearly* needs to be up on that list. And I'm with FelliniBlank - "Go West" is a fine song made even better. In fact, I'm here to argue that it clearly deserves to be #1 on the Gayest Songs list. Come ON people - what is gayer than a Village People song, or a Pet Shop Boys song? A PET SHOP BOYS COVER OF A VILLAGE PEOPLE SONG!!! If that's not the Gayest Song, then I never sucked a dick just to see what it was like. (Fortunately, this samesame.com list apparently allows me to continue asserting the latter never happened. NEVER, DO YOU HEAR ME?!?)
posted by Banky_Edwards at 6:05 PM on March 6 [1 favorite]

I forgot to mention another thing that "Go West" has going for it - my wife reports that it was (and probably still is) de rigueur to play that song at Mormon dances out west. In fact, she had no idea that a) it was a cover of a Village People song, or b) it was, in fact, the gayest song EVAR. I still chortle at the idea of hundreds of squeaky-clean, straight young Mormon kids dancing their little hearts out to "Go West." Go, Pet Shop Boys!
posted by Banky_Edwards at 6:08 PM on March 6 [1 favorite]

I still chortle at the idea of hundreds of squeaky-clean, straight young Mormon kids dancing their little hearts out to "Go West."

I think my brain just broke.
posted by rtha at 6:18 PM on March 6

Plenty of gay music in the Queer Music Heritage radio show. I wouldn't call much of it classic stuff--mostly it runs to contemporary or obscure (or both). But in addition to the show itself (available to stream or download) there's tons of info, neat historical tidbits and too much else to list. I think it's awesome.
posted by metabrilliant at 6:23 PM on March 6

lawdy, Bookhouse, that Erasure clip sent me reeling down memory lane to The Stud and The G-Spot nightclubs in SF. Good times. Ancient times.

The Stud on Wednesday nights!
posted by ericb at 6:34 PM on March 6

The people who composed this list must not think much of Billy Squier, because I'm pretty sure "The Stroke" is the gayest song ever.

However, it's not the gayest video ever. This is.
posted by WolfDaddy at 6:46 PM on March 6 [1 favorite]

I still chortle at the idea of hundreds of squeaky-clean, straight young Mormon kids dancing their little hearts out to "Go West."

I chortle at wedding receptions when three generations of folks sing and "do" the YMCA dance!

"Young man, there's no need to feel down.
I said, young man, pick yourself off the ground.
I said, young man, 'cause you're in a new town
There's no need to be unhappy.

Young man, there's a place you can go.
I said, young man, when you're short on your dough.
You can stay there, and I'm sure you will find
Many ways to have a good time.

It's fun to stay at the Y-M-C-A.
It's fun to stay at the Y-M-C-A.

They have everything for you men to enjoy,
You can hang out with all the boys ...

It's fun to stay at the Y-M-C-A.
It's fun to stay at the Y-M-C-A.

You can get yourself clean, you can have a good meal,
You can do what about you feel ...

Young man, are you listening to me?
I said, young man, what do you want to be?
I said, young man, you can make real your dreams.
But you got to know this one thing!

No man does it all by himself.
I said, young man, put your pride on the shelf,
And just go there, to the y.m.c.a.
I'm sure they can help you today.

It's fun to stay at the Y-M-C-A.
It's fun to stay at the Y-M-C-A.

They have everything for you men to enjoy,
You can hang out with all the boys ...

It's fun to stay at the Y-M-C-A.
It's fun to stay at the Y-M-C-A.

You can get yourself clean, you can have a good meal,
You can do what about you feel ...

Young man, I was once in your shoes.
I said, I was down and out with the blues.
I felt no man cared if I were alive.
I felt the whole world was so tight ...

That's when someone came up to me,
And said, young man, take a walk up the street.
There's a place there called the Y-M-C-A
They can start you back on your way.

It's fun to stay at the Y-M-C-A.
It's fun to stay at the Y-M-C-A.

They have everything for you men to enjoy,
You can hang out with all the boys ...

Y-M-C-A ... you'll find it at the Y-M-C-A.

Young man, young man, there's no need to feel down.
Young man, young man, get yourself off the ground.

Y-M-C-A ... you'll find it at the Y-M-C-A.

Young man, young man, there's no need to feel down.
Young man, young man, get yourself off the ground.

Y-M-C-A ... just go to the Y-M-C-A.

Young man, young man, are you listening to me?
Young man, young man, what do you wanna be?"

posted by ericb at 6:47 PM on March 6

No Tom Robinson "Glad To Be Gay"? WTF?
posted by kcds at 6:49 PM on March 6

This list is totally incomplete without "I'm Coming Out" by Diana Ross!

That's probably why it's at number 13, but I agree that's way too low.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 6:49 PM on March 6

Isn't this numa numa thing very gay?
posted by jouke at 6:57 PM on March 6

For anybody surprised at the results, or wondering why certain songs were omitted, I can explain.

The people who put this list together simply stole the set list of every single DJ of every single gay bar or club in Sydney.
posted by UbuRoivas at 6:58 PM on March 6

No Manowar?
FAIL
posted by not_on_display at 7:07 PM on March 6

Isn't this numa numa thing very gay?

Nah, just Romanian. This version's gayer, if only for having been remixed and sung by a guy in ganguro drag.

And now I'm going to have "Baby, I love you... aishiteru... Baby, I love you... Ohhh, chihuahua" stuck in my head for another few days."
posted by CKmtl at 7:18 PM on March 6

No Melissa Etheridge?

Nope. Even thought the definition of gay includes both genders, somehow gay men wrestled the word away from women. Gay men are gay. Gay women are lesbians.
posted by flarbuse at 7:43 PM on March 6

ABBA also performed Dancing Queen for King Carl XVI Gustav and Princess Silvia, at a performance the night before their wedding. And check the dude at 1:14.
posted by BlueMetal at 7:49 PM on March 6

Nope. Even thought the definition of gay includes both genders, somehow gay men wrestled the word away from women. Gay men are gay. Gay women are lesbians.

Most of the songs on the list aren't by gay men. So this doesn't explain the lack of Melissa Etheridge.

The lack of Melissa Etheridge is explained by the fact these songs are mostly camp classics and are played in clubs far more than Etheridge's songs.
posted by crossoverman at 7:56 PM on March 6

Oh, come ON!
posted by kittens for breakfast at 8:03 PM on March 6

You can tell it's an Australian list. I mean, I love ABBA and I bought all their albums when I was a teenager and all that, but they were never that big here in the States. Australia, though, was wild for ABBA. I've never seen ABBA drag here in the US.

Likewise, all the Kylie songs; either I'm too middle-aged or too American to get excited about her. I preferred the original version of "Your Disco Needs You." Of course, I'm also the one who prefers the original Village People "Go West" to the Pet Shop Boys version.
posted by Robert Angelo at 8:04 PM on March 6

No Melissa Etheridge?

Nope. Even thought the definition of gay includes both genders, somehow gay men wrestled the word away from women.

I don't think it's a gender / fags-vs-dykes thing at work. It's the nature of the survey they did: they were making a list of classic camp songs.

As gay as Melissa Etheridge is... her music is very, very not camp. I listened to Yes I Am and Your Little Secret almost daily when I was coming to terms with being gay. However, if she were up against techno-Cher in a campness contest, techno-Cher wins hands down.
posted by CKmtl at 8:07 PM on March 6

Likewise, all the Kylie songs

All two of them. Aussies were remarkably restrained when voting for this list in regard to Our Kylie.
posted by crossoverman at 8:07 PM on March 6

Motorhead, Nelson, Def Leppard, Judas Priest?
Ok. Maybe not Motorhead, but Lemmy's mole is just a tad rococco, innit it?

But jesting aside, I still wonder: does it have to be danceable to make the list? Cause I posit that sometimes leatherbitches just want to crank up the Judas Priest or Rammstein, which, I guess are danceable - just on a different spectrum all together. A diff'rent flavor of gay.

I think that the more insipid, non-club-dance gay list is more interesting food for thought and discussion than the cliché Elton John, Erasure, Wham & Village People choons.
posted by isopraxis at 8:09 PM on March 6

Oh, and how about Cruisin The Streets by Boys Town Gang
posted by Robert Angelo at 8:10 PM on March 6

No Kate? No Hedwig? No Pussy "If I can't sell it, I'm gonna sit back down on it!" Tourette?

This list is old troll and bordering on pathetic. Even the CD mix I put together to have playing in my car during an unwanted date to subtly suggest that I might not be into girls was gayer than this. It's like the set was assembled by thirty year old who came out in the 80's and his furry, coke-snorting, ex-disco "Daddy."
posted by adipocere at 8:32 PM on March 6

This right here? This is the gayest yawn of all time.

*yawn*

And I can say that. Because I'm gay.
posted by mudpuppie at 8:42 PM on March 6

My favorite gayest song is "Homos" by the Frogs.

oh mom, was always wondering why i was into sports
oh mom, was always wondering why i was staying after school
i'm into sports mom and also i'm in the locker room with the boys
i'm in the shower and i drop the soap every time
homos uh huh uh huh uh huh
homos no one knows a homo like us
we love homos
lesbians are cool
and straights are fools
lesbians rule their scene
but the homos are the coolest of the cools
homos uh huh uh huh uh huh
homos
they never knock at my front door
they never ring on the phone
they always come through the window
through the back door
through the throat
homos uh huh uh huh uh huh
homos

posted by jtron at 8:47 PM on March 6

The Pet Shop Boys' Go West is a perfect song, in my mind. It somehow manages to be campy and at the same time to capture the melancholy longing of young people to be accepted. That song, to my mind, perfectly evokes what it was like to be young and queer in the midwest in the 80s. At least if you were me.
posted by not that girl at 8:47 PM on March 6

No "Jacky"?
posted by [NOT HERMITOSIS-IST] at 8:49 PM on March 6

I have to agree with Bookhouse, didn't they get Erasure down under?
posted by cazoo at 9:04 PM on March 6

Or how about Erasure doing an Abba cover?
posted by cazoo at 9:05 PM on March 6

No "These Are the Finest Queen Boys (I've Ever Seen)" by The Frogs?
posted by oats at 9:14 PM on March 6

Oh, for fuck's sake. The two gayest songs in (recent) history:

2. Miquel Brown's "So Many Men, So Little Time"

1. Divine's "You Think You're a Man"
posted by ethnomethodologist at 9:57 PM on March 6

No Metallica?
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 9:57 PM on March 6 [1 favorite]

All the songs on the "Top Gun Soundtrack" are gayer than these.

And Playing With My Boys is the gayest of all.
posted by afu at 10:04 PM on March 6

No Queen, no Bette Midler, no Madonna, no Showtunes post Judy? D:

whatever, just go watch Paris Is Burning for me, k hon?
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 10:17 PM on March 6

Indeed, AV, that's such a good movie.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 10:30 PM on March 6

I'm just glad that CeCe Peniston made the list. Because really. She could have been a classically trained cellist and she still should have made the list, because her name is CeCe Peniston. I hope that's a stage name.
posted by DecemberBoy at 10:39 PM on March 6

Split Enz. I Got You (I Don't Know Why Sometimes I Get Frightened)

Howard Jones: Things Can Only Get Better

Kaja Goo Goo: Too Shy

Anything by Duran Duran
posted by telstar at 12:21 AM on March 7

I remember a lot of these from childhood, and also that I liked them then.
If only I'd clued in earlier, I wouldn't have wasted a bunch of time in denial.

sidenote to JP, if she ever sees this which I doubt but it's the internet so who knows: our time together was far from wasted; it's not that I didn't love you, and it's not that we didn't have a lot of good times together (the night of my birthday, that time I tried to surprise you with brownies during exam period that didn't go so well, pretty much all of ACF) it was just that I was in one of those weird identity transition phases and you were moving away in three weeks. It's been two years and I still miss you.
posted by heeeraldo at 12:45 AM on March 7

What about intentionally gay songs?
Soccer Practice?
It's ok to be gay?
Or even, dare I mention it, Pizazz?
posted by PontifexPrimus at 3:58 AM on March 7

The whole Work This/That/Your Pussy sub-genre is about as gay as it gets as well.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 5:15 AM on March 7

Rough Boys.
posted by emf at 5:18 AM on March 7

Dear Adipocere -- I think I might have dated you once.
posted by jfwlucy at 5:42 AM on March 7

No Queen, no Bette Midler, no Madonna, no Showtunes post Judy? D:

I go to the trouble of putting the entire list in the thread... do you want me to read it for you, too?

Queen's "I Want to Break Free" is at #21 and Madonna has two songs in the list - "Express Yourself" (#29) and "Vogue" (#9).

Everything Midler sings and every show tune are, by definition, gay. So the vote gets split...
posted by crossoverman at 5:52 AM on March 7

Also no Depeche Mode? Or Nancy Boy by Placebo?
posted by pointystick at 6:39 AM on March 7

I would have thought that everything on this album would be good. I have always had a soft spot for Elton Motello's Jet boy - Jet Girl .
posted by razorian at 7:03 AM on March 7

No Queen, no Bette Midler, no Madonna, no Showtunes post Judy?

Thanks for your efforts crossoverman, but the stupid is just.too.strong in these straight boys. Can we get a different batch to try out? (",)
posted by dash_slot- at 8:13 AM on March 7 [1 favorite]

I nominate Baltimora.
posted by Uther Bentrazor at 8:15 AM on March 7

lawdy, Bookhouse, that Erasure clip sent me reeling down memory lane to The Stud and The G-Spot nightclubs in SF. Good times. Ancient times.

Ohh, reminds me that I was at the very last G-Spot night at the EndUp. Sigh.

Is Judy Garland's The Trolley Song not as Gay in Sydney as it is in the States?
posted by desuetude at 8:16 AM on March 7

19. Coming Out Crew “Free, Gay and Happy”

That song's pretty gay... I guess.
posted by Fuzzy Monster at 8:18 AM on March 7

Other, gayer songs (that happen to be awesome/in my iTunes):

Calling All Boys—The Flirts. It's one of life's great ironies that Bobby Orlando was wildly homophobic (even refusing to live in a house that had previously had gay folks in it) while simultaneously putting out the gayest '80s synthpop imaginable.

Boys—Sabrina. If that version's not gay enough (like the lingering hetero feelings from hearing a woman sing it), there's a version by Bearforce (I think that's what they're called, they were posted here).

Jet Boy, Jet Girl—Elton Motello. "Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, he gives me head."

Homosapien—Pete Shelley. "I'm a homo…sapien too."

Down by that River Drive—Artist unknown. From the compilation "Homosexuality in America," it's the folky lament about getting picked up cruising by a cop, down by that river drive.

Gay Bar—The Electric Six. Is it ironic? Probably. Is it gay? Sure.

Cock in my Pants—Eppu Normaali. All the way from Helsinki's late'70s punk scene! He has a cock in his pants, but he wants your cock in his pants! "He doesn't want to fuck, he just wants romance!"

Underwear—Magnetic Fields. C'mon, gimme this one.
posted by klangklangston at 8:35 AM on March 7

I was going to post a jokey "WHAT, NO {insert incongruous band here}" comment. But then I noticed that there was no Smiths, David Bowie, or even fucking Jimmy Somerville on the list, and I wept.
posted by flashboy at 8:59 AM on March 7

Previous gay tunage.
posted by kirkaracha at 9:08 AM on March 7

Homosapien—Pete Shelley. "I'm a homo…sapien too."

That song was even banned by the BBC for the line "homo superior in my interior". The album, also titled "Homosapien", is a really underrated, really great post-punk synth-rock album which anyone who digs Buzzcocks should check out.

Also, where's the queercore? Pansy Division, Tribe 8, etc. Or Black Fag, a truly awesome all-gay Black Flag cover band that switches the "fuck it, make it a case" from Six Pack to "somebody get me an appleTIIIINIII!"?
posted by DecemberBoy at 2:18 PM on March 7

fucking Jimmy Somerville

See #14.
posted by Sys Rq at 3:16 PM on March 7

What, no "Walk on the Wild Side" by Lou Reed?
posted by crossoverman at 3:42 PM on March 7

Underwear—Magnetic Fields. C'mon, gimme this one.

Not the gayest Stephin Merritt song by a long shot.

Sorry I missed the Madonna and Queen even though I read the list. I was tearing up with fagony.

What about You Made Me Gay, by Gravy Train? So ghey.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 3:54 PM on March 7

gayest.thread.ever.

(well, maybe not, but I'm too lazy to check.)

No Brady Bunch?!
posted by not_on_display at 4:05 PM on March 7

Don't forget the Kink's Lola:

Girls will be boys and boys will be girls
It's a mixed up muddled up shook up world except for Lola
La-la-la-la Lola

posted by Robert Angelo at 5:33 PM on March 7

9 to 5?

?!?

I don't get it.
posted by mazola at 10:43 PM on March 7

9 to 5?

?!?

I don't get it.

Dolly Parton sang it.
posted by crossoverman at 11:58 PM on March 7 [1 favorite]

The Communards: Never Can Say Goodbye
I also thought wow, no Jimmy Somerville, but I didn't see a single Communards reference.
posted by hypersloth at 5:25 AM on March 8

..oh and then there's the original Depeche Mode songwriter who left after the first album, teamed up with Alison Moyet for Yaz, and then joined Andrew Bell for Erasure.. gay as hell. :)
This topic is fun; I love picturing macho 70's homophobes touting Queen as a hardcore band, only to find out the name was a dead giveaway.
(RIP Freddy)
posted by hypersloth at 5:39 AM on March 8