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A Video Movie Could Improve Your Life
March 12, 2008 3:43 AM   Subscribe

Who needs a movie? (SLYTP)

If this isn't the BOTW, I don't know what is.
posted by allkindsoftime (83 comments total) 37 users marked this as a favorite

 
With that kind of promo, my parents are finally going to make it big!



Psyche!
posted by clearly at 3:57 AM on March 12, 2008


Something deep down within me has just been destroyed.
posted by paintist at 4:15 AM on March 12, 2008 [2 favorites]


Great idear
posted by Gungho at 4:16 AM on March 12, 2008


With quality like this *edit cut* why haven't they been hired by ILM no question mark.
posted by DU at 4:35 AM on March 12, 2008


I could sure use a hug right now is equally baffling and odd. Thank you for the wake-up terror, I'll be browsing through these all morning.
posted by six-or-six-thirty at 4:39 AM on March 12, 2008 [1 favorite]


Other videos from Fred and Sharon:
Fred could sure use a hug right now.
George Bush meets Mahatma Ghandi

I only wish that fredandsharonsmovies.com weren't offline, because I'm sure that'd be a goldmine.

Also, I loved the two gloved, groping hands for the "How about prom?" section.
posted by splatta at 4:43 AM on March 12, 2008 [4 favorites]


Good video, but it could use some marble columns.
posted by PlusDistance at 4:47 AM on March 12, 2008 [3 favorites]


Thank God YouTube added the higher quality option.
posted by jbickers at 4:55 AM on March 12, 2008 [2 favorites]


I only wish that fredandsharonsmovies.com weren't offline, because I'm sure that'd be a goldmine..

Not really. You can see a cached version here.
posted by ubiquity at 4:58 AM on March 12, 2008


After further research: You can (presumably) see most of their videos on their YouTube Channel. Am I paranoid, or is it suspicious that they got the domain name in January and went off line two months later, just at the moment when they appear to be getting a lot of publicity?
posted by ubiquity at 5:07 AM on March 12, 2008


just at the moment when they appear to be getting a lot of publicity?

They start getting a lot of business (thanks to effective marketing), maybe more than they can handle, so they take the site down for a bit while they try to catch up with demand.

I don't see what's suspect about that.
posted by allkindsoftime at 5:20 AM on March 12, 2008


Uh...I've been assuming it's a joke. The editing isn't just bad, it's terrible. It's like every time they had a decision to make, they made the wrong one. Throwing random video clips into a blender would by chance produce a better ad than this.
posted by DU at 5:30 AM on March 12, 2008


Beautiful. Just beautiful.
posted by RokkitNite at 5:33 AM on March 12, 2008


I've always felt that I looked uncomfortable and stiff on camera ... until about 30 seconds ago.

Thanks Fred and Sharon!
posted by itchylick at 6:04 AM on March 12, 2008


Quite something.

splatta: "Also, I loved the two gloved, groping hands for the "How about prom?" section."

Yeah, what on earth was that about? Do they have "inept Zombie fisting" themed proms nowadays?
posted by jack_mo at 6:08 AM on March 12, 2008


The day I hire these two is the day Mary Ann gets busted for driving while stoned!

Oh.

Where's my checkbook?
posted by Dizzy at 6:21 AM on March 12, 2008 [1 favorite]


If this isn't the BOTW, I don't know what is.

You used to, so I wonder what happened.
posted by waraw at 6:36 AM on March 12, 2008 [1 favorite]


A video movie, eh? Interesting.
posted by ofthestrait at 7:11 AM on March 12, 2008


like a Saturday Night live skit but could be ....real.
Exhibit B:
Shoparama Christmas Craft Fair

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HqIp4m0fWTQ&feature=related
posted by celerystick at 7:33 AM on March 12, 2008


There's a link there that says: "Watch this video in higher quality" but it don't work.
posted by BrianBoyko at 7:57 AM on March 12, 2008 [1 favorite]


I liked the fact that they call them "Video Movies" which reminds me of the classic bit in Home Movies about how it is wrong to call movies filmed on video "Video films."
posted by tittergrrl at 8:23 AM on March 12, 2008 [1 favorite]


Bullshit, that's gotta be David Cross, right? in make-up right? No seriously.
posted by Uther Bentrazor at 8:38 AM on March 12, 2008


Thanks for the post!

It just inspired me to make my own home videos. In fact, I think I'll just strap a digital camera to my Basset Hound and let him shoot the movie.
posted by disgruntled at 8:42 AM on March 12, 2008


It does seem far too reminiscent of Tim and Eric's Awesome Show.
posted by nanojath at 8:48 AM on March 12, 2008 [1 favorite]


Heh. When I saw Ogopogo at the end of that clip, I realized this was Okanagan Lake, which I'm looking at out my window right now. Fred's Bread and Jam Bakery has a stall at the Farmers' Market here. What hath YouTube wrought?
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 9:05 AM on March 12, 2008 [1 favorite]


The question is, what happens when you call one of those numbers. Who's got the cojones to give it a shot?

(Ans: Not me!)
posted by tittergrrl at 9:06 AM on March 12, 2008


Do they have "inept Zombie fisting" themed proms nowadays?

Don't knock it.
posted by Astro Zombie at 9:06 AM on March 12, 2008 [1 favorite]


This has to be viral marketing.
posted by mecran01 at 9:12 AM on March 12, 2008


There's something about the way that Fred is intercut and chroma-keyed that is bringing to mind Max Headroom.

"W-w-w-who needs a m-m-movie? T-t-t-tune into Network 23!"
posted by quin at 9:14 AM on March 12, 2008 [1 favorite]


And as I watch this again, Sharon seems to be doing an impression of a terrified hostage making a proof-of-life video. Like she is reading the lines off a cue card held by some gun-wielding kidnapper just off camera.
posted by quin at 9:19 AM on March 12, 2008 [2 favorites]


It's not viral. I'll go down to Fred's Bakery and interview him if you want.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 9:19 AM on March 12, 2008 [2 favorites]




Looks like poor Sharon needs to back off on the medication.
posted by Daddy-O at 9:41 AM on March 12, 2008


The makeup job they did on Tim & Eric is really quite impressive.
posted by Sticherbeast at 9:53 AM on March 12, 2008 [2 favorites]


I want to kill myself now.
posted by eurasian at 10:01 AM on March 12, 2008


It's not viral. I'll go down to Fred's Bakery and interview him if you want.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 9:19 AM on March 12 [+] [!]


Want!

And try to get it on video.
posted by Reverend John at 10:06 AM on March 12, 2008 [1 favorite]


It's not viral. I'll go down to Fred's Bakery and interview him if you want.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 12:19 PM on March 12 [+] [!]


Yesyesyes!!
posted by tittergrrl at 10:16 AM on March 12, 2008


It's like they are amazed by the magic of video and anything captured by it must be cherished.
posted by starman at 10:32 AM on March 12, 2008


I'll see what I can do. Watch for an update tomorrow.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 10:35 AM on March 12, 2008 [3 favorites]


If this isn't the BOTW, I don't know what is.

And there you have it.
posted by humannaire at 10:49 AM on March 12, 2008


The rough quality of the edits gives Fred an aged, Canadian Max Headroom sort of feel.
posted by ninjew at 10:51 AM on March 12, 2008


It's not viral. I'll go down to Fred's Bakery and interview him if you want.

The MeFi Dectective Squad is on the case!
posted by mrnutty at 11:10 AM on March 12, 2008


Wow. *throws Turkish movie collection into dumpster*
posted by everichon at 11:17 AM on March 12, 2008 [1 favorite]


Effusive thanks to allkindsoftime for this. Hoo, boy.
posted by everichon at 11:19 AM on March 12, 2008


You know, there once was a time when something howlingly, awfully bad could be embraced as kitsch and enjoyed as such. Then came the deliberately bad, an attempt to cash in on the ironic success of the awfully bad. Then came ironic commentary on the deliberately bad. Now, having completely decoupled authorial intent from artistic output, we're left with just BAD.

Thanks, artists! You devious little fuckers.
posted by BitterOldPunk at 11:52 AM on March 12, 2008 [2 favorites]


Keep on truckin, Tim and Eric!
posted by bigschmoove at 1:17 PM on March 12, 2008


All the phone numbers I Googled for Fred's Bakery are outdated and now belong to different people or businesses, including multi-level financial marketeers, so I was beginning to think this was viral, but I finally got ahold of Fred through the guy who runs the Farmer's Market. Fred is real, he has a bakery, he is married to Sharon, and he is becoming aware of his impending fame. I just had a good conversation with him on the phone, and we're going to meet up on Sunday. I'll try for video. Stay tuned.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 1:18 PM on March 12, 2008 [8 favorites]


This one is astonishing.
posted by joe defroster at 2:05 PM on March 12, 2008 [1 favorite]


You know what I realized, after watching this? I would get a movie from them.
posted by flatluigi at 2:34 PM on March 12, 2008


And try to get it on video.

Preferably on video movie.
posted by katillathehun at 2:37 PM on March 12, 2008


Great job!
posted by nola at 5:16 PM on March 12, 2008


I'm gonna have to keep an eye out for this guy when Farmer's Market starts back up.

My inclination is to believe he's one of those people who is so incompetent that he doesn't even realize he's incompetent. At least in the realm of video production.

Or in other words, he's sincerely bad at this.
posted by five fresh fish at 8:39 PM on March 12, 2008 [1 favorite]


The lake at the end of the first video movie was pretty.
posted by eegphalanges at 10:52 PM on March 12, 2008


DAMMIT, I was gonna post this!
posted by miss lynnster at 12:14 PM on March 13, 2008


Sincerely bad = painfully good.
posted by miss lynnster at 12:19 PM on March 13, 2008


Man, I am just unbelievably excited about the update on this. I'm gonna be refreshing this page like crazy come Sunday.
posted by Greg Nog at 7:54 AM on March 14, 2008


Same here, I can't wait for the update...
posted by allkindsoftime at 12:15 PM on March 14, 2008


Oooh! Their site is back up and they are charging visitors $1 to watch more movies. But... but... they still have movies on youtube (for free) so... huh?
posted by miss lynnster at 9:08 PM on March 14, 2008


Sunday Update: Fred is too busy to meet today; we'll try for Monday.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 3:10 PM on March 16, 2008


Monday Update: I just spent about an hour with Fred and Sharon, and shot a short video which I will upload when Fred sees it and gives his OK. Likely tomorrow.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 4:20 PM on March 17, 2008


You mean... a video movie?

You ROCK.
posted by miss lynnster at 4:47 PM on March 17, 2008


A video movie. The MetaFilter interview with Fred and Sharon.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 5:35 PM on March 17, 2008


I am so deeply anticipatory over here. These past few days, I haven't been able to stop thinking about Fred's "I need a hug" creature descending upon his skull. Something in these movies is making heretofore-unknown synapses fire in my brain.
posted by Greg Nog at 8:45 AM on March 18, 2008


Fasten your seat belts: Fred has edited my video movie and put it up on YouTube. Includes a couple of plugs for MeFi.
Who Needs a Movie? is approaching 600,000 hits.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 9:15 PM on March 18, 2008 [12 favorites]


BTW, fff nailed it. Be nice, now.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 9:16 PM on March 18, 2008


Yay, what delightful folks they are and what a charming interview, w-g pandemonium. Hi rightbackatcha from Metafilter, Fred and Sharon!
posted by FelliniBlank at 9:43 PM on March 18, 2008


Oh. My. God.

(A) Was Sharon completely wrecked on pot, or completely terrified that WGP was going to... well, do whatever a weapons-grade pandemonium might do?

(B) This couple has no clue about the Internet. I'm sure Fred was posting his movie for his grandkids or friends to view. That someone might stumble across his fascinatingly awful work and share it with sixty thousand friends is something he quite likely still can't quite comprehend.

(C) I will never, ever share my stuff on the web. The consequences are too horrifying. Perfect strangers hunting you down, interviewing you, and then popularizing your imperfect work is the stuff of nightmares. It's bad enough my words go on record. God forbid something I really value get out there.
posted by five fresh fish at 9:46 PM on March 18, 2008


Calm down; nobody's after your fish.
posted by UbuRoivas at 9:53 PM on March 18, 2008


I love this. He says his next film will have an animated snake, eyeballs and Sharon; it'll be for young folks and overseas troops. Awesome. Just a pair of people being creative and enjoying themselves, then putting their stuff out there for people to view. YouTube is the new cable access and it is so great when people find these things.
posted by Salmonberry at 9:58 PM on March 18, 2008 [2 favorites]


That's six hundred thousand friends, fff.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 10:32 PM on March 18, 2008


wgp, that's wonderful. Did you warn them that people might hassle them? They seem so nice, it's grim to contemplate them (him?) getting discouraged from this activity they/he enjoys so much.
posted by LobsterMitten at 12:01 AM on March 19, 2008


Did Sharon loosen up when the camera was off? She seemed absolutely frozen with that smile and the echo-y talking.
posted by donnagirl at 9:14 AM on March 19, 2008


Oh god, I can only take this in like, 90 second intervals. And I'm digging them both, they seem very sweet and charming. But now, I'm stopped right after the part where Fred talks about Van Gogh making 70 paintings and then committing suicide, and then his paintings going from being worthless to priceless. I had to stop there because I was already over my 90 second limit, yet I so need to go back to find out if he's got some larger point which goes beyond suicide. Ok. I think I'm ready now.

Hahaha. "Do you intend to stop at 69 then?".

Phew. "I have no intention to off myself". Thank god.

Bye Sharon & Fred! Take care!
posted by Reverend John at 9:23 AM on March 19, 2008


Did you warn them that people might hassle them?

Yes, but they know this already. Thousands of emails--many of them insulting-- rude phone calls--the whole nine yards. All this inspired Fred's "I Need a Hug."
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 10:03 AM on March 19, 2008


The haters are a shame, but that cat's out of the bag. They will probably experience positive effects as well. If I had a video movie I needed made that would benefit by some sort of post-ironic anti-internet sort of vibe I would totally get Fred and Sharon to do it.
posted by nanojath at 10:20 AM on March 19, 2008


muh thou wee?
posted by quonsar at 2:36 PM on March 19, 2008


I am so picturing a "Snakes on a Plane!" animation with Sharon as the victim now. She already looks like she is scared to death, so she won't have to act. Fred seems like a sweet old guy, too. Good job, wgp!
posted by misha at 4:19 PM on March 19, 2008


I wish you'd shown Sharon's hands for a little bit longer, WGP. She looks totally parkinsonian and it would have been interesting to see if she has a rest tremor.
posted by ikkyu2 at 10:17 AM on March 20, 2008


I did show her hands for longer. Fred edited it out.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 12:08 PM on March 20, 2008


Fred sounds like David Lynch when he talks.
posted by Grangousier at 12:14 PM on March 20, 2008


No Country for Old Fred.

I haven't laughed so hard in years.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 2:09 PM on March 28, 2008 [4 favorites]


Oh, and Fred's latest video. And it's just like he said: Students. Troops. Snake. Eyeballs.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 7:19 PM on March 28, 2008


Oh jesus me... oh my.

I WORSHIP FRED!

I'm sorry, I did inhale, and this was a brilliant video. I don't know if the Fred we're seeing in the video is the Fred who's actually producing this stuff (as opposed to acting in it). But who ever the real person is behind the Fred-as-...producer?... concept is my new god.

If I see Fred at the farmer's market, I'll be buying whatever he's selling. I expect it's an herbal medicine.
posted by five fresh fish at 8:44 PM on March 28, 2008


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