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Told You So
March 29, 2008 6:00 PM   Subscribe

The World's Hardest Game

Move the red square into the green zone. Avoid the blue balls or you'll die. And die you shall.
A lot.
posted by bwg (68 comments total) 1 user marked this as a favorite

 
Wow... fuck that....
posted by Navelgazer at 6:05 PM on March 29, 2008 [7 favorites]


Meh.
posted by WalterMitty at 6:05 PM on March 29, 2008


Meh.

You're only saying that because you died.
posted by bwg at 6:09 PM on March 29, 2008


You play the monkey red dot and have to defeat the evil blue dots and then beat the great yellow dots. It's adventure all the way!
posted by chasing at 6:11 PM on March 29, 2008


Told You So. Yes I cand see what you mean.
posted by nola at 6:13 PM on March 29, 2008


Actually, I should have called it the world's most annoying game.
posted by bwg at 6:14 PM on March 29, 2008


pfft, this is just like playing against a good AWPer, but in flash and not a proper game engine.
posted by Submiqent at 6:17 PM on March 29, 2008


Ouch you hurt my firefox.
posted by The White Hat at 6:18 PM on March 29, 2008


I Wanna Be The Guy had more style.
posted by demiurge at 6:19 PM on March 29, 2008


Meh. It's no I Want To Be The Guy.
posted by slimepuppy at 6:19 PM on March 29, 2008 [2 favorites]


Addictive.
posted by Mikey-San at 6:24 PM on March 29, 2008 [1 favorite]


How is this the best of the web?

As flash games go, this is pretty mediocre, difficulty or no; I Want To Be The Guy is just as hard and at least has a semblance of a storyline.

So: Meh.

[We really need a flag that says, "This is not the best of the web".]
posted by WalterMitty at 6:24 PM on March 29, 2008


Well, I got to 6/30 and then thought... I have better things to do. Probably.

I reckon I'll be back...
posted by knapah at 6:24 PM on March 29, 2008


OK OK YOU'RE RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!
posted by Fuzzy Skinner at 6:26 PM on March 29, 2008


WalterMitty: Try the [Other] flag. Or go for the hat trick of apathy, you killjoy griper.

I'm enjoying it, even if my arrow keys aren't.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 6:28 PM on March 29, 2008


What is this thing? I mean, it serves no useful purpose for there to be a bunch of chompy, crushy things in the middle of a hallway. No, I mean we shouldn't have to do this, it makes no logical sense, why is it here?
posted by Johnny Assay at 6:30 PM on March 29, 2008 [4 favorites]


I don't know if this is the world's hardest game, but it's definitely hard enough to be not fun.
posted by tom_r at 6:32 PM on March 29, 2008 [1 favorite]


I could do this (and enjoy it) with mouse control.

Arrow keys, with that slow response time? Fuck. You.
posted by loquacious at 6:32 PM on March 29, 2008


Nah, as far as hard games go, this one wins; plus it's an RPG which gives it a heck of a lot more depth and variety than the one in this post.
posted by the other side at 6:32 PM on March 29, 2008 [8 favorites]


I just want to say my two favorite words this weekend are "chompy" and "crushy".
Thank you, Johnny A.
posted by Dizzy at 6:32 PM on March 29, 2008


I got to level 6.
posted by delmoi at 6:44 PM on March 29, 2008


Not that hard.

Also not that fun.
posted by Caduceus at 6:45 PM on March 29, 2008


Not that hard. It's all about making sure you make precise movements at the right time. The difficulty in this case stems from the fact that the control system dosen't always allow for the precise moments you require.

Super Mario Brothers: The Lost Levels
(the Jap version, not the neutered All Stars version) remains harder, in my opinion.
posted by Effigy2000 at 6:56 PM on March 29, 2008


The JAP version?
Shouldn't that be Effigy1942?
posted by Dizzy at 6:59 PM on March 29, 2008 [3 favorites]


I beat Ninja Gaiden a few weeks ago. It was pretty hard, but fun. Plus, ya know, it had a story that kept driving me to see the conclusion of.

It's incredible easy to design a game that's incredibly hard. It's not easy to make a game that's really hard, but fun enough that people actually want to play it.
posted by BeerFilter at 7:02 PM on March 29, 2008


Eh, it's alright. I'm not finding it that frustrating; the major difficulty is figuring a path that works and hitting it. It's definitely not as frustrating or as tough as this game, for example.
posted by flatluigi at 7:05 PM on March 29, 2008


God I'm so drunk... well that's my excuse.
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 7:09 PM on March 29, 2008


How is this the best of the web?

Never said it was the best of anything, although looking back I should have qualified my opinion by adding a question mark to the title.

In this case I was merely repeating the name of the game.

In short, it may be difficult, but I agree it's not much fun.
posted by bwg at 7:10 PM on March 29, 2008


You know why more games aren't this hard?
'cause it's no fun to play them.
posted by mrnutty at 7:13 PM on March 29, 2008


"You know why more games aren't this hard?
'cause it's no fun to play them."


Repeated for clarity.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 7:23 PM on March 29, 2008


Screw you, stupid game!!
posted by brain cloud at 7:26 PM on March 29, 2008


That's impossible. No one beats level three. You are the Moon Master!
posted by Citizen Premier at 7:37 PM on March 29, 2008 [1 favorite]


Eh, I enjoyed it. Final score of 351. I think it's less of a puzzle game than first impression suggests, though. It's more about execution. Level 23 was the only one that really took me a while to figure out.
posted by shadow vector at 7:49 PM on March 29, 2008 [1 favorite]


N is harder.

But otherwise, am I the only one who hears, "beta-lactam, giggle giggle" in the techno music?
posted by Orange Pamplemousse at 7:53 PM on March 29, 2008


This one is harder to quit than it is to play.
posted by Fuzzy Skinner at 7:59 PM on March 29, 2008 [6 favorites]


Never said it was the best of anything, although looking back I should have qualified my opinion by adding a question mark to the title.

I think WalterMitty's point was that "Best of the Web" is implied for things that people post here, regardless of whether the poster says it is, and that he didn't think this post qualified. I'm not going to debate whether it's the best or worst of anything, but that's what he meant.
posted by Mikey-San at 7:59 PM on March 29, 2008


This is not the world's hardest game.

The world's hardest game is "Roll a 7," played with a six-sided die. 0% chance to win == infinitely hard.

But if you want to talk about the hardest game it's possible to win, I've got you covered. By that measure, PC Rogue is the world's hardest game. Not Rogue Clone IV, which is subtly easier.
posted by JHarris at 8:12 PM on March 29, 2008


The world's hardest game is "Roll a 7," played with a six-sided die.

You, obviously, have never me Cohen The Barbarian.

Incidentally, I think he'd be able to beat this game. Of course, his definition of "beat" is smash into lots of tiny pieces, but he'd still be operational and the game wouldn't be. So there.
posted by Doublewhiskeycokenoice at 8:32 PM on March 29, 2008


Level 2....then SMASH KEYBOARD!!!
posted by saxamo at 8:45 PM on March 29, 2008


Meh. It's no I Want To Be The Guy.

God DAMNIT slimepuppy. I've been playing that game for two hours now.
posted by CitrusFreak12 at 8:46 PM on March 29, 2008


This is not the world's hardest game because this game is not Battletoads.

That is all.
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 8:49 PM on March 29, 2008 [2 favorites]


Dizzy: "The JAP version?
Shouldn't that be Effigy1942?
"

I had no idea that that word was a bad thing to say. Is it a bad thing to say? God, if so I am so, so sorry. I honestly just thought it was a truncated way of saying Japanese... which I suppose it is. But that it apparently contains some kind of racist overtone was certainly not known to me.

Anyhoo, my point is I had no intention of causing anyone any offense by saying it, if indeed it brought offense. My unreserved apologies go to anyone who was offended and as I have said to Dizzy via MeFi Mail, I'll make sure I avoid saying (or typing) that word again in the future.
posted by Effigy2000 at 8:50 PM on March 29, 2008 [1 favorite]


World's least fun game!
posted by obvious at 8:53 PM on March 29, 2008


gaaaahhh!!

lvl 8 and 65 deaths... HOW MANY LEVELS!!??? Anyone get to lvl 10+?



I loved it until i cried.
posted by [son] QUAALUDE at 9:01 PM on March 29, 2008


Eh, I enjoyed it. Final score of 351. I think it's less of a puzzle game than first impression suggests, though. It's more about execution. Level 23 was the only one that really took me a while to figure out.
posted by shadow vector at 7:49 PM on March 29 [+] [!]



wait.... you said lvl 23?

+1 for utter disbelief
posted by [son] QUAALUDE at 9:05 PM on March 29, 2008


I beat the whole game. Survived the four blue dots and escaped from the hallway. Then, instead of congratulating me, it gave me a different game. However, I had no time to play this fascinating new game where you try to survive 8+ blue circles, because I had to save a kitten from a small bush.
posted by Cyclopsis Raptor at 9:06 PM on March 29, 2008


My favorite kind of "hard games" are competitive games (Go) or games that also feature interesting environments and varied challenges (La Mulana).

This is... not great.
posted by sonic meat machine at 9:13 PM on March 29, 2008


This is not the world's hardest game because this game is not Battletoads.

This man speaks the truth. Fuck level three.
posted by Mikey-San at 9:17 PM on March 29, 2008


Yup, after 25 seconds of trying and failing, I gave up. It's difficult, alright, but really - this game is not as addictive as its URL would have you believe.
posted by idiomatika at 9:19 PM on March 29, 2008


Fuzzy Skinner said: "This one is harder to quit than it is to play."

Damn you, Fuzzy. I had been Filler-free for three weeks.

Turns out I'm awesomely better at when I've been drinking.

Who knew?
posted by pineapple at 9:28 PM on March 29, 2008


Turns out I'm awesomely better at when I've been drinking.

This comment's proof is in the pudding.
posted by shakespeherian at 9:41 PM on March 29, 2008 [2 favorites]


Bah. This game is harder.
posted by Pyry at 9:56 PM on March 29, 2008 [1 favorite]


Actually, you know what's the hardest game around? The one I (and you) just lost. Sorry.
posted by flatluigi at 10:13 PM on March 29, 2008 [2 favorites]


OCD crack
posted by mrmojoflying at 10:18 PM on March 29, 2008


That reminds me, there was a very nice pudding at dinner. It had ganache.
posted by pineapple at 11:02 PM on March 29, 2008


Got to level 22/30. Died some 475-odd times.

I hate you, and I hate that I've wasted that precious bit of my life on this.
posted by Zephyrial at 11:12 PM on March 29, 2008


MetaFilter: Avoid the blue balls or you'll die.
posted by dantsea at 11:34 PM on March 29, 2008


I just got through a tormenting addiction to I Wanna Be The Guy. No more, thanks.
posted by painquale at 11:46 PM on March 29, 2008


"Avoid the blue balls or you'll die."

My girlfriend dosen't buy that argument.
posted by Second Account For Making Jokey Comments at 11:49 PM on March 29, 2008 [2 favorites]


I'm stopping at level 8. Yikes.
posted by Stunt at 12:06 AM on March 30, 2008


I have played Kaizo Mario World and you, sir, are no Kaizo Mario World.
posted by terpsichoria at 4:11 AM on March 30, 2008


I like games.
posted by Ebray at 9:37 AM on March 30, 2008


What do you get if you when? If it's worth it I'll play 'til the end, but if not I'm not clicking that link.
posted by saysthis at 10:20 AM on March 30, 2008


Fuck you.
No offense.
posted by From Bklyn at 1:38 PM on March 30, 2008


This game doesn't balance the "hmm, this is really interesting and challenging" enough with the "I seem to be dying about 40 times a minute". It starts out being difficult and then just gets annoying.
posted by tehloki at 5:30 PM on March 30, 2008


I got further with this than I did with Commandos 2.
posted by biffa at 2:41 AM on March 31, 2008


You guys are a little mean and I'm a little contrarian. I thought it was a decent game, though definitely not the hardest. There was a similar game I found from metafilter where you couldn't touch anything including the walls, and that was tough. Too Lazy To Link (TLTL).
posted by Edgewise at 3:22 AM on March 31, 2008


Metafilter: it may be difficult, but it's not much fun.
posted by Reverend John at 3:08 PM on March 31, 2008


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