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It's not your dad's bicycle.
May 28, 2008 5:07 AM   Subscribe

If Wile E. Coyote entered the Tour de France, this would be his ride. Brought to you by some guy who always wanted to be a human missile. No word if he's going to move from eBay to Acme one day. (The bike running briefly at ear-shredding volume. The slightly more elegant European version. And, of course, Jeremy Clarkson on a jet-powered bike with a pretty basket in front.)
posted by maudlin (25 comments total) 1 user marked this as a favorite

 
If Wile E. Coyote entered the Tour de France, wouldn't he have to travel under his own power? Or are you intimating less than noble means to my childhood role model and lifetime hero?
posted by DU at 5:23 AM on May 28, 2008


50mph is for poofs. Humans can power a bicycle to 80mph and real men cycle down snowy mountains at 130mph. Hardcore men hook their bike up to a car and unhook at 152mph.
posted by MuffinMan at 5:39 AM on May 28, 2008 [1 favorite]


Also, Wile E. Coyote is a fictitious character and would not be able to enter the Tour de France. He would need to be a real coyote, and, if so, that bike would never fit a coyote. It would need to be highly modified and, as DU pointed out, it would need to be self-powered.

Personally I don't think any of this would happen.
posted by jimmythefish at 6:15 AM on May 28, 2008 [4 favorites]


Tour de France riders can already reach 50mph without needing drugs or bulky heat shielding around the ankles.
posted by ardgedee at 6:20 AM on May 28, 2008 [1 favorite]


Lame. A true hipster would be on a rocket powered fixie.
posted by (parenthetic me) at 6:23 AM on May 28, 2008 [6 favorites]


Tour de France riders can already reach 50mph without needing drugs...

When did they stop the drugs?
posted by TedW at 6:33 AM on May 28, 2008 [1 favorite]


> When did they stop the drugs?

With a steep enough hill and a raceworthy bike, you could probably top 50mph yourself. It's all about the gravity assistance and a big enough gearing to overcome the air resistance. If anything, you'll probably be wanting Valium rather than EPO.
posted by ardgedee at 7:06 AM on May 28, 2008


50 mph is for wimps. Here's the Olympic track sprinter Theo Bos hitting 80 mph whilst motor pacing behind a car.
posted by afx237vi at 7:16 AM on May 28, 2008


Here's the Olympic track sprinter Theo Bos hitting 80 mph whilst motor pacing behind a car.

:O That is all.
posted by WalterMitty at 7:21 AM on May 28, 2008


Theo was impressive, but every time he started pedalling like mad, it reminded me of this.

And thanks, naysayers, for dashing my dreams of Wile E. in the Tour. I so wanted to see him in the mountain stages.
posted by maudlin at 7:27 AM on May 28, 2008


I want to see him attach a couple of these to a pair of rollerskates.
posted by Faint of Butt at 7:32 AM on May 28, 2008


How does he keep from cooking his leg? Every time I've seen a pulse jet, it's been red-hot a few minutes after starting it up.
posted by jenkinsEar at 7:36 AM on May 28, 2008


I always figured Wile E to be more of a rocket and roller-skates sort.

Speaking of rockets and bikes: this seems dangerous, but not as bad as this.
posted by quin at 7:42 AM on May 28, 2008


All i can think of is the neighbors getting woken up by some wtf-tard.
posted by storybored at 8:01 AM on May 28, 2008


Alright, the sheer brazen hutzpah of this surpasses the stupity of it.

Great post.
posted by humannaire at 8:25 AM on May 28, 2008


Obligatory NY Times link re: the 1993 MacGyver lawsuit.
posted by Smart Dalek at 8:47 AM on May 28, 2008


I was expecting something more like this.
posted by Goofyy at 9:00 AM on May 28, 2008


I certainly hope that bicycle's built really well. Not even considering the vibration from the pulse jet, the bike would probably start to shake itself apart if tolerances around the moving parts are sloppy.

He should totally put some wings on it, though.
posted by backseatpilot at 9:25 AM on May 28, 2008


If I was worried about my bike falling apart at 50 mph I wouldn't be riding it at 15 mph.
posted by TheOnlyCoolTim at 9:53 AM on May 28, 2008


I feel like I've seen this somewhere before.
posted by DJWeezy at 1:13 PM on May 28, 2008


The sound of this .. thing would scare the crap out anyone who lived through The Blitz.
posted by Carmody'sPrize at 4:45 PM on May 28, 2008


Seems to me the rocket bikers and the euro-design jet bike rider hate their penis.
posted by IndpMed at 7:01 PM on May 28, 2008


The sound of this .. thing would scare the crap out anyone who lived through The Blitz.

I dunno.. It sounds like the Leaky Gas team time trial to me.
posted by Chuckles at 9:19 PM on May 28, 2008


It's missing a "ONE LESS ROCKETCAR" sticker.
posted by whir at 9:41 PM on May 28, 2008 [1 favorite]


I prefer "THIS BIKE IS A PIPEBOMB".
posted by ryanrs at 1:55 AM on May 29, 2008


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