Join 3,438 readers in helping fund MetaFilter (Hide)


How do I Injury Me? Let Me Count the Ways.
November 4, 2008 7:31 AM   Subscribe

A cornucopia of 'pictorial representations' of safety messages for industry. All images freely available in EPS and and DXF format. My personal favorite is this rather unfortunate situation.
posted by sp160n (47 comments total) 40 users marked this as a favorite

 
If only real PTO manglings looked this fun.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 7:34 AM on November 4, 2008


for some reason I'm hearing the theme to the Three Stooges while browsing these.
posted by kuujjuarapik at 7:43 AM on November 4, 2008


This is my favourite: http://www.aem.org/Documents/Technical/Pictorials/AEM0015.jpg
posted by Tapioca at 7:45 AM on November 4, 2008


Oh awesome. I kind of collect these, and I am so thrilled to find this site. I have one that I love from home that has a silhouette baby happily sitting inside a closed Rubbermaid tub. Thanks sp160n.
posted by Rock Steady at 7:46 AM on November 4, 2008


Katie Holmes wedding ring.
You voted wrong.
posted by netbros at 7:49 AM on November 4, 2008 [1 favorite]


Alvy -- I interpreted that one as a failed pole dance.
posted by schmedeman at 7:52 AM on November 4, 2008 [4 favorites]


I saw a lot of these at the shipyard where my husband worked in Korea. So many contractors from so many different countries — pictorials are the quickest way to get one's safety message across.

It's like Bloopers in stick figure form.
posted by Brittanie at 7:56 AM on November 4, 2008


Your planet is being vaporized to make way for an Intergalactic Hyperspace Bypass.
posted by steef at 7:57 AM on November 4, 2008 [3 favorites]


Belly button lint insertion manual
posted by therubettes at 8:03 AM on November 4, 2008 [2 favorites]


This page made my morning.

Danger, pole dancing. Yay, farming! Superman can stop bullets. Warning, you could be replaced by a machine. The goggles, they do something. Everybody's favorite, explosion!

Self portrait.
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow at 8:08 AM on November 4, 2008 [6 favorites]


I've always been a fan of the "Carnage" warning sign from Bungie.
posted by Rhaomi at 8:10 AM on November 4, 2008 [2 favorites]


Caution: Superman.

Caution: Superman Returns.
posted by sixswitch at 8:12 AM on November 4, 2008


It's even more fun if you caption each one with "OW! My balls!"

Related-ly, when one of my cousins was about one year old, she thought the image on her car seat warning label was a dog. She kept pointing at it and asking, "Puppy?" I didn't have the heart to tell her that it was a baby getting crushed by an airbag.
posted by Metroid Baby at 8:13 AM on November 4, 2008


Only VaxaSprayTM with Extra Acid kills shadow puppets dead.
posted by sixswitch at 8:16 AM on November 4, 2008 [2 favorites]


Make you own ANSI/HAZMAT sign with the Safety Sign Builder (registration required or use bugmenot).
posted by djb at 8:33 AM on November 4, 2008 [1 favorite]


In case of terrorist attack, do not discard brain
posted by lukemeister at 8:35 AM on November 4, 2008 [1 favorite]


Hey, when did I unsubscribe from Wellington?
posted by DU at 8:38 AM on November 4, 2008


La la la, let your fingers do the walking O SHIT JESUS CHRIST ALMIGHTY
posted by porn in the woods at 8:38 AM on November 4, 2008 [1 favorite]


Puppies feel soft. Don't pet the puppy.

No hypnotizing.

Make snow angels here.

Blow on the dandelion.

When the aliens arrive, use these handcuffs.

Obama and Biden raise your hands.
posted by nickyskye at 8:40 AM on November 4, 2008 [3 favorites]


Collaborate and listen.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 8:45 AM on November 4, 2008 [2 favorites]


Ice is back with a brand new invention.

Something grabs hold of me tightly.

Flow like a harpoon daily and nightly
posted by robocop is bleeding at 8:52 AM on November 4, 2008 [3 favorites]


Superheroes only

Designated Parkour Area

No pole dancing

Watch for babies while mowing the lawn
posted by hallowdmachine at 9:00 AM on November 4, 2008 [1 favorite]


I love these things. One of the best airplane conversations I ever had was with a guy who somehow put up with my amusement and we spent the better portion of the flight trying to decipher what exactly the cryptoglyphs meant. It was odd how many 'shoes or no shoes allowed' scenarios there were. Apparently as long as you aren't wearing high heels you're usually okay. But I think that might be the least of my concerns if I was in a plummeting airplane.
posted by six-or-six-thirty at 9:13 AM on November 4, 2008


These are totally awesome. Screen printing on a t-shirt awesome.
posted by fuq at 9:49 AM on November 4, 2008 [1 favorite]


This brings to mind the Stick Figures In Peril pool.
posted by Monochrome at 9:56 AM on November 4, 2008 [1 favorite]


Interactive Frogger prohibited.

No boots allowed.

Yes, your penis will fit through this door.
posted by cmgonzalez at 10:03 AM on November 4, 2008 [3 favorites]


Beware giant flyswatters.
posted by cmgonzalez at 10:04 AM on November 4, 2008


I think this is a pictograph for that one x-files episode. You know, the one where that squirrely kid is struck by lightening and harnesses it's awesome power to woo Scully? And that machine would be an arcade cabinet, of course. Because who doesn't remember the 3rd episode from the 3rd x-files series? Apparently, not me.
posted by filthy light thief at 10:23 AM on November 4, 2008


The bees, THE BEES!
posted by redsparkler at 11:12 AM on November 4, 2008 [2 favorites]


To save folks the trouble of clicking a bunch of times, I stuck the entire collection of 130 Encapsualted PostScript files on megaupload. Now go make some art.
posted by majick at 11:23 AM on November 4, 2008


SHUT DOWN ALL THE GARBAGE MASHERS ON THE DETENTION LEVEL!
posted by bitslayer at 11:39 AM on November 4, 2008 [1 favorite]


Anders Sandberg's Warning signs for tomorrow.
posted by wobh at 11:44 AM on November 4, 2008 [3 favorites]


WARNING: WARNING AHEAD.

(I was trying to find that warning signs of tomorrow link! Thanks wobh!)
posted by The Whelk at 12:08 PM on November 4, 2008


This somehow reminds me of something I saw where someone took the pictures from a pushbutton hand dryer (you know, "push button/rub hands under warm air" and captioned them, "push button/receive bacon".
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 1:08 PM on November 4, 2008 [1 favorite]


Keep your hands off my laptop?
posted by An Infinity Of Monkeys at 2:31 PM on November 4, 2008 [1 favorite]


You must fly the corkscrew spaceship into Unicron's eye.
posted by turgid dahlia at 2:52 PM on November 4, 2008 [1 favorite]


Many of the pictograms can be incorporated into OSHA and ANSI compliant signage here and here.
posted by klarck at 3:06 PM on November 4, 2008


This is a treasure trove. Thanks, sp160n.
posted by lekvar at 3:10 PM on November 4, 2008


Space Roland not permitted (source)

SPLIT YOUR LUNGS WITH BLOOD AND THUNDER

Welcome to SPARTA

Hammertime!

Goatse ahead

No interracial hand-fondling

No fisting

Pass bong to the right
posted by turgid dahlia at 3:10 PM on November 4, 2008 [2 favorites]


hand dryer gives bacon
posted by nickyskye at 7:24 PM on November 4, 2008 [1 favorite]


They need a don't stick your penis in the machine one. Y'know, for all the times men are tempted to stick their penis into softly sucking machine orofices containing rotating knives or grinding gears. What?
posted by BrotherCaine at 8:15 PM on November 4, 2008 [1 favorite]


*orifices*
posted by BrotherCaine at 8:16 PM on November 4, 2008


This is like a huge database of t-shirt designs. I need to get silkscreening equipment again.
posted by Joakim Ziegler at 1:47 AM on November 5, 2008


Several years ago, there was a link here to a 'make your own warning sign' flash based(?) online app that would output in pdf(?) which was absolutely fantastic.

Almost better than the TF2 Kill Notification Generator and Achievement Generator. Political
posted by asok at 4:05 AM on November 5, 2008


asok: Several years ago, there was a link here to a 'make your own warning sign' flash based (?) online app that would output in pdf (?) which was absolutely fantastic.

I believe this web app is what you're remembering?
posted by letourneau at 7:02 PM on November 5, 2008


Or maybe the Electromark sign wizard?
posted by AsYouKnow Bob at 7:23 PM on November 5, 2008


I love this one.
posted by box at 10:33 AM on November 6, 2008


« Older Having trouble voting? Have a question about the ...  |  Oregon prof's immunology resea... Newer »


This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments