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Swimming pools, movie stars. Cha-ching!
December 9, 2008 11:57 AM   Subscribe

"The multi-million dollar casino will feature unique applications of The Beverly Hillbillies theme. Granny’s Shot Gun Weddin’ Chapel, Jethro’s All-You-Ken-Et Buffet, the Cement Pond, Granny’s White Lightnin’ Bar complete with rain & lightning ["The waitresses are dressed like Elly May but padded like Dolly Parton"], Elly May’s Buns (Bakery) [Link possibly NSFW], gourmet meals from Drysdales’ Fancy Eatin’ Fo Da Richins, Granny’s Vittles & Hog Jowls Coffee Shop, and an oil derrick are just a few of the many attractions … a project of Las Vegas standards will be created!"

Max Baer, Jr. -- that's Jethro to you -- "has the rights from CBS to use The Beverly Hillbillies theme for casinos, hotels, theme parks, restaurants, cosmetics and consumables." And by god, he's going to exercise that right.

Good news: The final hurdle for the casino has been overcome. Over the objections of the church across the street, County Commissioners gave the go-ahead yesterday for the 9-story oil derrick that will serve as the casino's welcome beacon. (Sadly, the original plans for a 200-foot-tall derrick were quashed.)
posted by mudpuppie (61 comments total) 1 user marked this as a favorite

 
Well shet my mouth.
posted by hermitosis at 12:04 PM on December 9, 2008


"With these theme related touches, and many more, The Beverly Hillbillies experience can become a marketing coup that will be irresistible to millions of guests."

Irresistible....I do not think it means what Max Baer, Jr. thinks it means.
posted by brandman at 12:09 PM on December 9, 2008


The multi-million dollar casino

Is Wall Street opening up an exciting, new financial market opportunity?
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 12:09 PM on December 9, 2008


"Las Vegas standards"

Wow. A new record for oxymorons.
posted by GuyZero at 12:10 PM on December 9, 2008 [1 favorite]


It's quite lovely, elegant and an understated paean to the hazards of family inter-marriage but I'm wondering if the marble statues of Elly May, Jed and Granny around the pool might not be overdoing it just a bit.
posted by Mike D at 12:13 PM on December 9, 2008


Okay, I might be in the minority here, but on first glance it sounds like a fun concept. Besides, if you can't get crassly commercialized accommodations in Las Vegas, where can you?
posted by amyms at 12:14 PM on December 9, 2008 [2 favorites]


Bubblin' crude, indeed.
posted by kuujjuarapik at 12:15 PM on December 9, 2008 [3 favorites]


if you can't get crassly commercialized accommodations in Las Vegas, where can you?

Carson City, actually.

But yeah, I'd go here, if it were actually in Las Vegas. I love Vegas and Vegas-style attractions, but only for two or three days at a time. More than that is overkill. This is like a high-concept Hooters hotel and casino. Yeah, high-concept Hooters, that's right.
posted by uncleozzy at 12:17 PM on December 9, 2008 [3 favorites]


It's on Carson City, not Las Vegas. But if I ever fin'd myself in that area, I know where I'll be staying.
posted by rocket88 at 12:17 PM on December 9, 2008


With a basket full of maple leaves in every bathroom.
posted by netbros at 12:19 PM on December 9, 2008


Baer has been scouting sites across the state including an empty Wal-Mart building ...

An empty Wall Mart would have been the perfect spot this!
posted by Slack-a-gogo at 12:20 PM on December 9, 2008


Hey asavage - can you really shoot intot the ground and have oil come bubling up?
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 12:22 PM on December 9, 2008 [2 favorites]


Well, Max Baer, Jr. is a right nice feller, but if brains was lard he wouldn't grease too big a pan.
posted by dirtdirt at 12:24 PM on December 9, 2008 [2 favorites]


But I'd totally stay here.
posted by dirtdirt at 12:24 PM on December 9, 2008


More like a project of Branson, Mo. standards...
posted by horsemuth at 12:24 PM on December 9, 2008


I've heard of Elly Mae showin' off her critters in public before, but this is ridiculous.


Hey-o!
posted by Spatch at 12:25 PM on December 9, 2008


What's next, the Petticoat Junction Shady Rest casino, the My Mother, The Car auto lot and Hogan's Stalag 13 Baccarat Table?
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 12:27 PM on December 9, 2008 [2 favorites]


Oh, yeah, this'll definitely thrive in the new economy.
posted by l33tpolicywonk at 12:29 PM on December 9, 2008


The multi-million dollar casino

Is Wall Street opening up an exciting, new financial market opportunity?


Or, is the government? Is a bailout for Vegas casinos next?
posted by ericb at 12:30 PM on December 9, 2008


Am I the only one that thinks this is exactly the sort of thing that Las Vegas was invented for?
posted by Astro Zombie at 12:30 PM on December 9, 2008 [2 favorites]


EmpressCallipygos...I don't know what's next, but as long as they don't build the Gordon Jump bicycle shop, I'll be happy.
posted by brandman at 12:31 PM on December 9, 2008 [2 favorites]


What's next, the Petticoat Junction Shady Rest casino, the My Mother, The Car auto lot and Hogan's Stalag 13 Baccarat Table?

Actually, I'd prefer a Stalag 13 theme casino, probably a better idea overall.
posted by lordrunningclam at 12:32 PM on December 9, 2008


Talk about striking when the iron is hot. Beverly Hillbillies mania is at a fever pitch right now.
posted by ALongDecember at 12:32 PM on December 9, 2008 [8 favorites]


Is a bailout for Vegas casinos next?

You know, I have high hopes for falling airfares and hotel rates. I haven't been to Vegas in a few years, and I sort of miss it.
posted by uncleozzy at 12:33 PM on December 9, 2008


I'm confused....what is Elly May's connection to the Coppertone Girl?
posted by and hosted from Uranus at 12:34 PM on December 9, 2008


Carson City, actually.

Oops. I need to get me some of them fancy readin' skills.
posted by amyms at 12:34 PM on December 9, 2008


the marble statues of Elly May, Jed and Granny around the pool

That'd be the cee-ment pond, son.
posted by padraigin at 12:36 PM on December 9, 2008


Will there be a lesbian-themed Hathaway's Hooters?
posted by WolfDaddy at 12:39 PM on December 9, 2008 [2 favorites]


I hope for everyone's sake that their casino building skills are more advanced than their web design skills.
posted by Beautiful Screaming Lady at 12:44 PM on December 9, 2008


A country bar where it's raining on all four sides - the bartenders are men dressed like Granny who do bottle twirling entertainment
like Tom Cruise did in the movie "Cocktail" - oh yeah, that’s entertainment.

Y’know, the idea would suck less if it weren’t pretty much exactly like everything else in Vegas except with a different statue, or knicknack or whatever as a center piece.

Put Grandpa’s Drag-u-la in front of the same resturant/buffet with the curvy padded and sculpted plastic covered seats and voila, it’s the Munsters. Same damned carpeting too.
posted by Smedleyman at 12:45 PM on December 9, 2008 [1 favorite]


Um ... hasn't this been "just around the corner" for like 20-30 years? Has something changed? I mean, more power to Max Baer, but I remember him inviting Johnny Carson to the grand opening back in the early 80's.
posted by RavinDave at 12:45 PM on December 9, 2008 [1 favorite]


I had no idea that Jethro was the son of the big-livin', Jewish hero boxer Max Baer, until this post.

Thanks! Cool to know.
posted by lumpenprole at 12:46 PM on December 9, 2008


I was going to be cynical, but if this leads to some bluegrass musicians getting a paying gig, I'm all for it.
posted by dances_with_sneetches at 12:46 PM on December 9, 2008 [1 favorite]


Choosing a theme from a TV show that ended production 40 years ago doesn't sound like too great an idea. Who are they hoping to attract? Only people over the age of 50? Or, god forbid, is BH still run in syndication? Are younger people still subjected to it?
posted by tippiedog at 12:47 PM on December 9, 2008


I think it works as conceptual piece confronting the American class system.
posted by bhnyc at 12:53 PM on December 9, 2008 [4 favorites]


Am I the only one that thinks this is exactly the sort of thing that Las Vegas was invented for?

No.

No, you are not.
posted by Joe Beese at 12:56 PM on December 9, 2008


Um ... hasn't this been "just around the corner" for like 20-30 years? Has something changed? I mean, more power to Max Baer, but I remember him inviting Johnny Carson to the grand opening back in the early 80's.
posted by RavinDave


Yep, this has been planned for a very long time. About 10-15 years ago I heard him on a radio talk show talking about his soon to be opened Beverly Hillbillies themed casino. I also remember he came off as something of an ass, though it probably had something to do with the DJs laughing at the idea.
posted by justgary at 1:04 PM on December 9, 2008


I suppose Crason city will do, though.
posted by Astro Zombie at 1:05 PM on December 9, 2008


I suppose Crason city will do, though.

I'm picturing a city made of Craisins, and I don't like it one bit. Vile little things.
posted by uncleozzy at 1:08 PM on December 9, 2008


I had no idea that Jethro was the son of the big-livin', Jewish hero boxer Max Baer, until this post.

Yep. Jethro's real dad defeats Nazi: 1, 2, 3.
posted by pracowity at 1:12 PM on December 9, 2008 [1 favorite]


And around it they can build a subdivision of two-story double-wides! You know, for rich people.
posted by BitterOldPunk at 1:24 PM on December 9, 2008


I don't think this'll work. I've been doin' some cipherin' and the gazintas just don't come out.
posted by Floydd at 1:39 PM on December 9, 2008


Oh god. The first casino concept to appeal to my parents. Especially if there are pool tables reserved for the fancy eating.
posted by Tehanu at 1:41 PM on December 9, 2008


Nice links pracowity

(though let's remember that Schmeling was no nazi. He was used in propaganda, but hid jews and paid Joe Louis' medical bills in later days. Still Baer's defeat of a German champion with the star of david on his trunks was a big deal.)

/end derail
posted by lumpenprole at 1:49 PM on December 9, 2008 [1 favorite]


Choosing a theme from a TV show that ended production 40 years ago doesn't sound like too great an idea. Who are they hoping to attract? Only people over the age of 50? Or, god forbid, is BH still run in syndication? Are younger people still subjected to it?

tippiedog - While I am surprised to see this theme come about now, the show still runs on a vaguely watchable hour of 8am on WGN America, and on the wee hours of TV Land (via IMDB). And I remember seeing the show on some Nickelodeon-type channel, and I'm not yet in my 30s. Still, it'll be really odd if any of this comes to fruition.

Then again, what are (US) casinos other than extravagant palaces of nostalgia and fantasy? A giant black pyramid shooting a beam of light into the sky? Lush tropical gardens and volcanoes? International monuments shrunken down and shoved into one block? A giant oil derrick would be one of the more realistic (if scaled-up) elements in that area (assuming there is oil under them thar hills, somewhere).
posted by filthy light thief at 1:54 PM on December 9, 2008


Wasn't this discussed on the TV news in, like, 1995?
posted by parmanparman at 1:58 PM on December 9, 2008


Up from the ground came a casino that's crude.
posted by DecemberBoy at 2:28 PM on December 9, 2008 [1 favorite]


parmanparman - wikipedia has some dates.
Baer obtained the sublicensing rights, including food and beverage rights, to "The Beverly Hillbillies" from CBS in 1991.... Sixty-five "Beverly Hillbillies" slot machines were built in 1999 and placed in ten casinos.

In late 2003, Baer attempted the redevelopment of a former Wal-Mart location in Carson City into a Beverly Hillbillies themed hotel and casino, but was unsuccessful due to building code conflicts and other developers on the neighboring properties. On May 4, 2007, Baer announced the sale of the property and the purchase of another parcel just outside of Carson City.
Sounds like he's still working on the details.
posted by filthy light thief at 2:39 PM on December 9, 2008


Let it go, Max. Just let it go.
posted by strangeleftydoublethink at 2:54 PM on December 9, 2008 [1 favorite]


My predicted conversation:

"Hello, front desk? Yes, could you send someone up to my room? There seems to be a problem... well, I'm not sure how this came to happen, but I'm pretty sure that there is a family of possum living in my closet, and they've taken over my luggage. I can't get to my toothbrush... Yes, I am aware of the theme of this casino... What do you mean they are part of the "experience"? The big one growled at me! No I don't want a different themed pet! What are you talking about?.. wait, so I could get skunk or raccoon instead?

Does the raccoon have babies? Because those are awfully cute... Ok, send it up, but I want these possum out of here! And you should really clarify what the Ellie May Suite entails exactly."
posted by quin at 2:59 PM on December 9, 2008 [1 favorite]


To the baby-boom generation, Elly Mae Clampett was an important cultural touchstone, much like Lynda Carter and Catherine Bach were for my generation. Through her, thousands of pre-adolecent boys discovered their heterosexuality.
posted by jonmc at 4:36 PM on December 9, 2008


I once considered being Ellie Mae for Halloween. No one else my age knew what I was talking about, so I dropped the idea pretty quickly. But I did a quick internet search to get an idea of her outfit. jon, those guys have Photoshop now and I wish they didn't.
posted by Tehanu at 4:39 PM on December 9, 2008


I wouldn't imagine I would ever paraphrase this quote: but, out there, some people just don't see America like the way you and I see America.
posted by phyrewerx at 7:31 PM on December 9, 2008


Does the raccoon have babies? Because those are awfully cute...

They are, but the mom will rip your face off.
posted by krinklyfig at 9:32 PM on December 9, 2008


Trivia: Irene Ryan (who played "Granny") suffered a stroke on-stage during a performance of the musical Pippin on Broadway in which she portrayed the role of Pippin's grandmother, Berthe.

She died sometime later (April 26, 1973).

Her posthumous Tony nomination recognized her character's solo song: "No Time At All."
posted by ericb at 10:33 PM on December 9, 2008


I had always heard that -- as a tribute -- for a week after her death, when the "No Time At All" sequence was played, the dancers gathered around an empty space on the stage with a lone spot-light while they played a recording of Irene Ryan's song.

I had never heard the version linked too above. Not without its charm, but I guess I'm too used to the original cast album. Still, it was wonderful hearing it.
posted by RavinDave at 10:45 PM on December 9, 2008


He's still on this kick? What a total waste of money. When he dies, it will foreclose and it will be bulldozed to hell. And we'll all be better for it. Who the hell even remembers Beverly Hillbillies to give a shit?
posted by dasheekeejones at 6:40 AM on December 10, 2008


Now, if they had a ST:TOS themed hotel where all the rooms were done up like staterooms on NCC-1701 and all the staff wore TOS uniforms and the doors went SHOONK, that would be awesome.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 7:49 AM on December 10, 2008


Now, if they had a ST:TOS themed hotel where all the rooms were done up like staterooms on NCC-1701 and all the staff wore TOS uniforms and the doors went SHOONK, that would be awesome.

Actually, ROU_X, you just missed that.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 11:29 AM on December 10, 2008


Actually, ROU_X, you just missed that.

I didn't want to like it. But after skimming the description, well, that sounds pretty cool.

What would be even better is to have a whole casino like that, where you're playing blackjack on the bridge of the ship, or perhaps more appropriately the lounge or a rec room. Slot machines could be in the engineering room. Music from the show could play in the background, punctuated by special effect noises. And, yeah, the doors would be just like in the show. I'm not sure if it would beat the Flamingo for kitchy popularity, but I would go.
posted by krinklyfig at 6:22 PM on December 10, 2008


Oh, and of course huge screens in some areas showing space scenes, even better if they were directly from the original show.
posted by krinklyfig at 6:23 PM on December 10, 2008


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