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January 30, 2009 11:04 AM   Subscribe


 
This weak link was seen also this week on reddit, digg, gizmodo, Information Week, tech radar, the NASDAQ ticker, and my parent's refrigerator.
posted by plexi at 11:07 AM on January 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


I'm resisting the urge to quote the Simpsons here.
posted by potsmokinghippieoverlord at 11:08 AM on January 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


You forgot the isawthisalloverthefuckingweb tag.
posted by xmutex at 11:09 AM on January 30, 2009


"Can you prove it didn't happen?"
posted by Joe Beese at 11:09 AM on January 30, 2009


Well, *I* hadn't seen it. Boo hoo hoo.
posted by SmileyChewtrain at 11:09 AM on January 30, 2009


I'm still not aware of this.
posted by mazola at 11:11 AM on January 30, 2009 [2 favorites]


... along with the Swiss pot bust.
posted by gman at 11:11 AM on January 30, 2009


Tragedy has struck though.

Interesting they knew the foal's name, even more interesting that they would name the google van "Tragedy."
posted by piratebowling at 11:11 AM on January 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


think drudge had this....
posted by clavdivs at 11:12 AM on January 30, 2009


don't swerve, brake until the very last second before impact

Wait, don't brake until the last second? Or don't swerve while braking? Or let off the brake in the last second before impact? I'm confused.
posted by kuujjuarapik at 11:18 AM on January 30, 2009


Somebody call the bambulance!
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 11:18 AM on January 30, 2009


Oh deer!
posted by hellojed at 11:21 AM on January 30, 2009 [2 favorites]


Google responds:

The driver was understandably upset, and promptly stopped to alert the local police and the Street View team at Google. The deer was able to move and had left the area by the time the police arrived. The police explained to our driver that, sadly, this was not an uncommon occurrence in the region -- the New York State Department of Transportation estimates that 60,000-70,000 deer collisions happen per year in New York alone -- and no police report needed to be filed.
posted by GuyZero at 11:25 AM on January 30, 2009


Wait, don't brake until the last second? Or don't swerve while braking? Or let off the brake in the last second before impact? I'm confused.

a) don't swerve. Just keep going straight.
b) brake like hell
c) at the very last second, let off on the brakes. This brings up the nose of the car so the deer is more likely to go under the car as opposed to up and onto the windshield where it will do much more damage to the driver

So sayeth google. I've never hit a deer personally.
posted by GuyZero at 11:27 AM on January 30, 2009 [3 favorites]


I'd hit a deer, if it were attractive.



No -- no, I wouldn't.




I'd only hit it if it insulted my mother.
posted by potsmokinghippieoverlord at 11:29 AM on January 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


D'oh.
posted by Diskeater at 11:30 AM on January 30, 2009


So there's no link to the actual Street View for this?
posted by dunkadunc at 11:37 AM on January 30, 2009


It totally looks like the deer was at fault.
And probably drunk.
posted by rocket88 at 11:39 AM on January 30, 2009


.
posted by OverlappingElvis at 11:40 AM on January 30, 2009


"Due to several user requests using the "Report a concern" tool, these images are no longer available in Street View."
posted by GuyZero at 11:41 AM on January 30, 2009


As the cars roar into Upstate New York it seems apparent that our citizens are staying off the streets, which may make scoring particularly difficult, even with this year's rule changes. To recap those revisions: women are still worth 10 points more than men in all age brackets, but teenagers now rack up 40 points, and toddlers under 12 now rate a big 70 points. The big score: anyone, any sex, over 75 years old has been upped to 100 points. Deer won't get you shit.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 11:43 AM on January 30, 2009 [10 favorites]


toddlers under 12?
posted by cashman at 11:53 AM on January 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


GuyZero : So sayeth google. I've never hit a deer personally.

Me either, but I've been hit by five of them over the years. Broadsided.

It's led me to a couple of conclusions; 1.) while pretty, deer are about the dumbest animals on the planet (as evidence, I submit the time that I was hit by a deer while stopped at an intersection. It hit me while I was standing still.) and 2.) Deer must really fucking hate me to be willing to sacrifice themselves at the chance of killing my ass dead.

As to this particular "tragedy" did you read the part where the deer was up and gone by the time the authorities arrived? Yeah, that deer now knows that cars can't kill it and it will continue to hurl itself into traffic in an effort to be the one that finally takes me out.

I think I must have wronged them at some point, but I'll be damned if I can remember it.

Little fuckers.
posted by quin at 11:59 AM on January 30, 2009 [5 favorites]


This weak link was seen also this week on reddit, digg, gizmodo, Information Week, tech radar, the NASDAQ ticker, and my parent's refrigerator.

I think you might be spending too much time indoors.
posted by Atom Eyes at 12:00 PM on January 30, 2009 [7 favorites]


I wonder if the GoogleMobile was the culprit that ran over my mailbox...
posted by VicNebulous at 12:00 PM on January 30, 2009


This weak link was seen also this week on reddit, digg, gizmodo, Information Week, tech radar, the NASDAQ ticker, and my parent's refrigerator.

I think you spend too much time on the internet.

And in your parents' refrigerator. Mooch.

Thanks, Artw!
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 12:06 PM on January 30, 2009


I drove completely under a young buck in rural Virginia, once. He sprang out into a curve in the road, and I put both feet down on the clutch and brake simultaneously at about 50 mph, and swerved hard left. The wheels locked and the engine died.

The deer, meanwhile, had calculated that his only options were to either 1) teleport, or B) just jump straight up about four feet in the air. He chose the latter, and I skidded right under him, tires smoking. His hooves scuffed the roof over my head, and he landed safely just to my left, near the passenger door on the driver's side, and just casually strolled off into the woods, leaving me to unlock my fingers from the steering wheel.

I was just pissed there was nobody there to see it.
posted by steef at 12:11 PM on January 30, 2009 [6 favorites]


hell, here in Michigan hitting deer is a sport... more venison on the table.....

I hit one head on with a brand new Miata at about 50 mph once, sucker slide onto the hood, up the windshield, over the convertible top and off the trunk, got up and ran off before I came to a stop.

They scare the crap out of me when I ride the Harley at dawn or dusk...
posted by HuronBob at 12:13 PM on January 30, 2009


I was just pissed there was nobody there to see it.

Imagine yourself in between motorcycles here.
posted by cashman at 12:16 PM on January 30, 2009


I knew someone in Michigan who did considerable damage to their car when they landed on a deer. Yes, I said "landed on" a deer. See, he was driving pretty fast up a small rise, went airborn, and when he came down the other side, there was a couple hundred pounds of leather wrapped, pre-tenderized venison stew meat all piled up for him in the road, there. Would have made for a nice Christmas present if not for all the damage it did to his undercarriage. By which I mean his shorts.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 12:21 PM on January 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


I much prefer this bit of google street view errata.
posted by ORthey at 12:27 PM on January 30, 2009 [5 favorites]


It's the moose you really have to worry about. If the initial collision doesn't get you, the follow-on leg whip will.
posted by chinston at 12:32 PM on January 30, 2009


They then proceeded to dish out some road safety advice: don't swerve, brake until the very last second before impact

And you're supposed to think of this and execute in the 1/4 second between the time you notice the deer and the time you hit it.

I hit a moose coming out of Gorham, NH once and while I was still shaking from the experience, as the tow truck was hoisting the moose onto his flatbed, some local yokel advised me on what I should have done in order to assure that the meat would remain as tender as possible after the impact. I didn't see the damn thing until the second I hit it.
posted by bondcliff at 12:32 PM on January 30, 2009


A møøse once bit my sister. I ran it over with a google street view car.
posted by Dumsnill at 12:34 PM on January 30, 2009 [7 favorites]


I see that they've taken down most of the relevant images, but you can still see the soon-to-be injured deer in the distance.
posted by MrMoonPie at 12:36 PM on January 30, 2009


This happened in the county where I live. Go Monroe County!
posted by Lucinda at 12:41 PM on January 30, 2009


I think it is time to make a law against driving and taking pictures at the same time.
posted by troybob at 12:42 PM on January 30, 2009


Living in rural Montana, I see deer (both live and dead) on/near the road daily. I always slow down in those most common areas because they will decide their fate at the last second. I, personally have hit one, at about 50mph, with my 3/4 ton Chevy. It flew about 20 feet in the air, landed on the shoulder, then got up and ran away. And yes, they are so very stupid. Also, many Montanans carry some manner of pistol in their vehicle for the sole reason of putting a dying deer out of its misery it it has been injured considerably. While I feel bad doing it, I'd rather kill it, than to see a deer laying on the side of the road with a broken neck or back. Couple of things:

1. Don't swerve - hit the deer. It will do far less damage than a) having a head-on collision or b) driving off the side of the road.
2. Brake, but don't initiate the car "sliding" - again, it's better to just hit the deer at full speed than to do 360s on the highway.
3. If it's an elk or a moose - good f'ing luck.

This brings up the nose of the car so the deer is more likely to go under the car as opposed to up and onto the windshield where it will do much more damage to the driver


Sounds great in theory, but even MythBusters proved that largely ineffective.
posted by BoKnows at 12:45 PM on January 30, 2009


I think they botched the product rollout for Google Venison (beta)
posted by bicyclefish at 12:55 PM on January 30, 2009


Tomorrow's news: Zombie deer stalks forest.
posted by panboi at 12:56 PM on January 30, 2009


"D'oh!" "A deer!" "A female deer!"
posted by kirkaracha at 1:00 PM on January 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


I drove completely under a young buck in rural Virginia, once.

I almost did that. He didn't quite make it. Instead he destroyed my roof, but left the front-end completely intact. Oh yeah, I have a photo. (Not gory.)
posted by smackfu at 1:02 PM on January 30, 2009


Well, it was 4 in the mornin'. 22 degrees outside. 'Course, you weren't there... pussy! I'm in a camouflage deer blind, I got grease paint on my face, I had deer urine on my boots- I'm not sure why. I've got a .30-06 rifle that can fire a bullet at 2500 feet per second. When that deer looked up to lick the salt lure I'd hung from the danged ol' tree, I caught him right above the eye."
And I'm going, "Yeah? Well I hit one with a van. Going 55 miles an hour, with the headlights on and the horn blowin'!" Woo, that's an elusive little creature! If you ever miss one, it's because the bullet's moving too fast. I'll tell you what; slow the bullet down to 55 miles an hour, and put some headlights and a little horn on it.
(I enjoy the Ron White)


You think the Google car guys drive around with the Police Squad theme on a loop?
‘cos that would be awesome.
And when it got old, it would be even more awesome in the annoying but funny because it’s so annoying way.
Most especially when you hit a deer and the soundtrack just keeps going. And it’s, y’know, the Google car. Comedy.
posted by Smedleyman at 1:08 PM on January 30, 2009


I came around a sharp curve up in the North Woods one time, this was back when I had the convertible Wrangler, you know, and it was a beautiful warm evening in the early fall, sort of an Indian summer feel to it still. Remember what the air used to smell like, in those days, on an Indian summer evening in the North Woods? Pine and crushed oak leaves, a little tang of woodsmoke from people burning brush... can't beat it.

So anyway, like I said I came around a sharp corner and there's this doe just standing there, side-on, middle of the road, staring at me like... almost like she knew I was coming, if that doesn't sound too weird. Some kind of woodland sense of fate or something. I know, I know, but really. She was just... looking at me. Just looking. I can still see her eyes, in that split-second, liquid pools of black, and the longest most delicate eyelashes you've ever seen. It couldn't have even been a whole second. I was tooling along, 55 at least. Had that Jeep's soft top down so I could smell the woodsmoke and pine and just breathe the air.

She was just looking at me, like she had always known that on this night, in this place, these two lives would intersect and no one could tell what would happen after that. A singularity. The place where all probabilities collapse and what comes out bears no relation -- can have no possible relation -- to what went in. Like she knew.

There was no time to brake. There was no time for anything. I just closed my eyes and squeezed the sides of the wheel and offered one of those tiny wordless prayers to whatever might be listening to make this be ok, somehow.

And I don't know, still to this day, how she did it. But somehow, in that onionskin-thin slice of time that was no time at all, she jumped. Straight up, over the little square windshield those Jeeps used to have back then, I felt the tips of her hooves brush the very top of my head like the caress of a passing angel, so light I might have imagined it, and then she landed square on all four hooves in the little cargo space behind the front seat, braced right up against the rollbar, not a hair mussed, not one of those beautiful eyelashes out of place.

And that, kids, is how I met your mother.
posted by rusty at 1:13 PM on January 30, 2009 [20 favorites]


cashman, those are the rules from 1975, so the age classifications are a bit dated. But because the latest revision changed the rules, most people rely on the original.
posted by filthy light thief at 1:16 PM on January 30, 2009


Doe no evil.
posted by sourwookie at 1:30 PM on January 30, 2009


In other news, Google stocks are down a buck a share.
posted by sourwookie at 1:31 PM on January 30, 2009 [3 favorites]


at the very last second, let off on the brakes. This brings up the nose of the car so the deer is more likely to go under the car as opposed to up and onto the windshield where it will do much more damage to the driver

Unmitigated horse deer shit. The amount of spring travel in the typical automobile's suspension is a couple of inches. Unless you're Inspector Gadget or something.

I once went to a rural junk yard in Maine and there was a whole section of cars that had the same inexplicable damage: a caved in windshield and a crushed front bumper. When I asked why so many vehicles had the exact same (strange) damage, the guy explained they were all moose accidents. When a car hits a moose it takes out the legs like toothpicks, sending the bulk of the beast straight through the window.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 1:32 PM on January 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


Screw deer.

I hit a mountain lion.

Grawr!

True story. In 1994, about 3 a.m., I-5 in Northern California. Shasta / Trinity National Forest. Right after the highway climbs out of the San Joaquin Valley. I was driving a 1988 Volkswagen Fox. I had only enough time for my visual cortex to register "mountain lion" before I smacked it at about 70 mph and the left-front tire rolled over it. My foot never left the gas pedal.

I turned around, re-traced my path, couldn't find him. I did NOT get out of the car, thinking that either the injured mountain lion would get his vengeance, or a speeding truck would nail me in exactly the same manner that I nailed the cat.

It shockingly did zero damage to the car, apart from bending one of these little tow-hook things on Jettas and Fox models from of that time.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 1:38 PM on January 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


When a car hits a moose it takes out the legs like toothpicks, sending the bulk of the beast straight through the window.

Which was pretty clearly demonstrated on that show featuring MeFi's own asavage.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 1:42 PM on January 30, 2009 [1 favorite]


Unmitigated horse deer shit.

Well, let me be clear that I offer no warranty on those instructions. YMMV. Also, In the Unlikely Event That A Deer Should Contact Antimatter in Any Form, a Catastrophic Explosion Will Result. In fairness to the cops who provided the instructions, the instructions were for deer and not moose. You might be able to get over a deer. A moose, in the immortal words of Hudson, is game over man. GAME OVER.
posted by GuyZero at 1:43 PM on January 30, 2009


I’ve got a one piece winch bumper with a 10k winch and a solid steel bull bar on my Jeep (bit of a lift, air tank, compressor, power inverter, tool kit, wilderness rack, game hoist, etc. etc. - yeah, I’m ready for the zombie apocalypse...so? ) Always wondered what’d happen if I hit a deer. Splash probably. But since I’m typically driving pretty slow in and out of those areas (either to go hunt or hauling something back) I doubt it’d be too bad. Out in Michigan a buddy of mine hit a deer with a Hyundai Accent, wow that was ugly. Came through the window and just spread all over the inside of the car. She was hospitalized, pretty bad. The people in the back were all cut up. The passenger was perfectly fine though, weird.
I wouldn't want to hit a moose or an elk though.
posted by Smedleyman at 2:16 PM on January 30, 2009


The only thing I remember from driver's ed is my instructor telling everyone to step on the gas if we hit a deer, to keep the animal's momentum going and getting it to roll over the roof of the car. Otherwise, it would land on your windshield and destroy you by kicking its hooves through the glass.

Luckily I haven't had any reason to test this hypothesis yet, though deer wander through my yard daily.
posted by sugarfish at 7:48 PM on January 30, 2009


i hit a deer once in winter, which caused my car to spin out so that i ended up on the other side of the road facing the other way going the opposite direction

i have no fucking idea how i did that - just lucky, i guess - the deer ran off

the other time i hit a deer, i damaged the front and killed it outright - of course, by the time i reported it to the sheriff's office for insurance purposes the deer had been scooped up by some local poor person who needed the meat - at least in calhoun county, people grab that size road kill pretty fast

over in kalamazoo county, they just let them sit by the side of the road - yay, affluence
posted by pyramid termite at 9:29 PM on January 30, 2009


Vehicle vs. deer calls are so common in my, uh, neck of the occasional-woods-surrounded-by-cornfields that the sheriff's department has stopped dispatching officers unless there are human injuries. (The carcasses are picked up by highway crews regardless.)
posted by dhartung at 10:55 PM on January 30, 2009


Noo not Bambi!
posted by Xany at 2:47 AM on January 31, 2009


OK, this is just creepy. I read this post last night at the tail-end of work. About 10 minutes later as I was driving home...I hit a deer. I swear it wasn't on purpose.
The poor thing darted out between two houses. I caught a blur of motion out of the corner of my eye and thought "brown". I completely forgot about all the advice in this thread and just slammed on the brakes. I was almost stopped when I hit her.
She went down, and I could just see her legs flailing around. Within a couple of seconds she flipped back onto her feet and took off like a rocket down a side street. I can't find any damage on the car, not so much as scratched paint.

So, I'm pretty sure that Metafilter is cursed.
posted by Eddie Mars at 9:07 AM on January 31, 2009 [2 favorites]


"Deer won't get you shit."

You've obviously never killed any kind of mammal.
posted by Eideteker at 11:11 AM on January 31, 2009


Hit my deer outside Ontonagan, Michigan (say ya to da yoopee, eh?). Fortunately, I was driving a company car at the time. Damage wasn't extreme, and the deer ran away (pity, they're tasty). Three deer came running across the road at an angle, I clipped the last one.

Up in those parts, dead deer are a great place to spot bald eagles, which are quite happy dinning on carrion. One time I caught a fleeting glimpse, out of the corner of my eye, of 2 eagles atop a deer carcass, along Highway 2. No time to turn to look.
posted by Goofyy at 6:28 AM on February 2, 2009


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