Floating high on the 17,000 calorie seas May 8, 2009 7:31 AM Subscribe
The Meat ShipIngredients:
~20 sausages
~48 rashers of bacon
1.2kg of sausage meat
1kg of pork mince
10 franks
1kg of pastry (not 100% meat this time)
1 onion
1 mushroom
2 packets of chipolata sausages
various food colourings
sage
Sequel to the Meat House.Previously. posted by daHIFI (40 comments total)
3 users marked this as a favorite
This is sort of how I imagine it would look if the Chapman brothers worked in meat. Only they'd have better figurines piloting their God forsaken meat vessel into a bacony oblivion instead of improvising portly sausage men. posted by CheshireCat at 7:41 AM on May 8
Sure, we could make a meat boat that looks and tastes good, but let's just throw a bunch of raw sausages together and hang some bacon on it. Done! posted by uncleozzy at 7:51 AM on May 8 [1 favorite]
Two words: Viking. Funeral. posted by The Whelk at 7:55 AM on May 8
The final product didn't resemble a meat ship so much as a big pile of meat, partially supported by wooden skewers. I guess that's not quite as catchy, though. posted by owtytrof at 8:01 AM on May 8 [1 favorite]
That's why you ought to cook the meat first. This would have been such an attractive meatship if the meat and pastry had all been cooked before assembly. Except maybe the bacon, maybe. This is a recipe for a floppy meatship adrift on a sea of grease, and I don't like it. posted by uncleozzy at 8:05 AM on May 8
Optamystic, I'm sure you could make a halal version.
Imagine a star trek future where whales would preside over an "animal truth and reconciliation commission" or something, and stumble upon these images. I mean, seriously, it looks just so horrendously messed up…
–You made a what out of them? A tiny captains hat? What the fuck is wrong with you! posted by monocultured at 8:05 AM on May 8 [3 favorites]
That's absolutely vile.
I'll be having a salad for lunch now. Now and forever. posted by mrstrotsky at 8:05 AM on May 8
floppy meatship adrift on a sea of grease - a postcoital scene in the kitchen of a McDonald's. posted by backseatpilot at 8:09 AM on May 8 [1 favorite]
These meat-stunt posts always serve to push me a wee bit closer to vegetarianism. posted by rusty at 8:19 AM on May 8 [2 favorites]
i'm not sure i feel too good about food coloring ground meat... i draw the line at frosting and easter eggs. posted by fuzzypantalones at 8:23 AM on May 8
I coined a new term for this sort of thing, this morning: Cholesterotica.
Feel free to use it. posted by jake at 8:37 AM on May 8
"coming out, the sails have shrunken somewhat"
...as has my breakfast, all over my keyboard.
[actually it looks similar! ... nom nom and it tastes similar, too! Mmmm!]
CheshireCat: This is sort of how I imagine it would look if the Chapman brothers worked in meat. Only they'd have better figurines piloting their God forsaken meat vessel into a bacony oblivion instead of improvising portly sausage men.
It ain't tragic to die doing what you love. posted by slimepuppy at 9:41 AM on May 8
Im finding that I tend to hate things that people do just so they can put pictures of it on the internet. Is there a word for it yet? This one is particularly useless and horrible. posted by ElmerFishpaw at 10:06 AM on May 8
With the sails looking ragged and the timbers askew, it doesn't look so much like a ship o' the line as a ship o' the damned. Which is an apt analogy, I suppose. posted by explosion at 10:37 AM on May 8
Before you slip into unconsciousness,
I'll have another turkey breast,
Another cardiac carress,
Another shank, another shank. posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 10:54 AM on May 8 [3 favorites]
Before you slip into unconsciousness,
I'll have another turkey breast,
Another cardiac carress,
Another shank, another shank.
The pork is cured and filled with salt
Enclose it with your sauerkraut
The thyme you used was too potent; but,
We'll eat again, we'll eat again
Oh tell me you have some freedom fries
Some ketchup and turkey pot pies
Deliver me some gravy in pint-size
You'd rather try it on sourdough rye
everyone sing along with me, now:
The cutlet ship is being filled
With sausage curls, a thousand broils
A million ways to baste your ham
When we get back, I'll have some lamb posted by Blazecock Pileon at 12:01 PM on May 8 [6 favorites]
"Ah, pretty good Jim Morrison impersonation there. I hope those guys have a good sense of humor and don't take us into court."
"What's the court? You mean the People's Court?" posted by Blazecock Pileon at 1:17 PM on May 8
This is why the terrorists hate us. posted by mkultra at 1:38 PM on May 8
Odin Quincannon:
Thought of "Preacher" as soon as I saw the Meat House! posted by TDavis at 3:55 PM on May 8
Now they need to make a ship just from hearts & arteries and put them on the table in a mock battle. [hint]: the meat ship wins. posted by Lukenlogs at 6:29 PM on May 8
I'm glad I'm vegan. posted by Malice at 8:23 PM on May 8
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posted by middleclasstool at 7:33 AM on May 8 [4 favorites]