The Web OS

May 20, 2009 10:17 AM

Grabarz & Partner's website looks oddly familiar... A German ad agency, apparently they couldn't be bothered of thinking of something original so they ripped off an existing concept.
posted by GuyZero (62 comments total)

That must be slightly disturbing to their Windows based clients.
posted by doctor_negative at 10:20 AM on May 20, 2009

Someone put an awful lot of work into breaking the web.
posted by sbutler at 10:20 AM on May 20, 2009 [3 favorites]

And snark aside, holy cow, it's awesome.
posted by GuyZero at 10:21 AM on May 20, 2009 [2 favorites]

Probably der Spiderman.
posted by solipsophistocracy at 10:21 AM on May 20, 2009

And then grabbed my browser and resized the hell out of it.
posted by DU at 10:25 AM on May 20, 2009 [4 favorites]

All that pretty flash is invisible to search engine spiders. Cool looking, though.
posted by ben242 at 10:26 AM on May 20, 2009 [1 favorite]

> That must be slightly disturbing to their Windows based clients.

Their what?
posted by ardgedee at 10:28 AM on May 20, 2009 [1 favorite]

Oh good, I still remember some German.

Except I can't recall how to say, "Don't fucking resize my fucking browser you fucking fucks!" Any ideas?
posted by backseatpilot at 10:29 AM on May 20, 2009 [11 favorites]

You can switch to English by clicking the text that says "Deutch" or however it's spelled.
posted by GuyZero at 10:31 AM on May 20, 2009

I say it "Preferences -> Content -> Advanced button next to Enable JavaScript -> Move or resize existing windows"
posted by Plutor at 10:31 AM on May 20, 2009 [4 favorites]

That was cool until I saw the M$ icons in the dock. Then I clicked on them, and it was cool again.
posted by disclaimer at 10:33 AM on May 20, 2009

That must be slightly disturbing to their Windows based clients.

Especially without any means of figuring out or understanding what is what.

Cool concept, great technically and artistically, but if I were a client, I'd note the utter failure of what I suppose to be the principal goal of advertising - getting my message across to the users who are most likely to read it. I certainly would be wary about hiring them to design my widgets-are-us.com site.

Unless this agency is a B2B agency that deals with other designers or Mac-oriented people.
posted by xetere at 10:38 AM on May 20, 2009

The amount of functional detail is just staggering.
posted by monospace at 10:38 AM on May 20, 2009

Nothing New Is Original Anymore, GuyZero! *scoff*


;-)
posted by mrzer0 at 10:41 AM on May 20, 2009

That just saved me a couple of thousand bucks. Thanks, German ad guys!

Signed,
Windows user.
posted by maudlin at 10:43 AM on May 20, 2009

> All that pretty flash is invisible to search engine spiders.

Not really. It's not as effective as structured HTML as far as Google's concerned, but that's the only significant penalty.
posted by ardgedee at 10:43 AM on May 20, 2009

Grossartig.
posted by kid ichorous at 10:44 AM on May 20, 2009

Does XXX mean something different in German? That folder was completely SFW, and I was unimpressed.

If you're pining for some old Windows interface, Martin Margiela can help you.
posted by filthy light thief at 10:45 AM on May 20, 2009

Everyone knows you can't open files from directly within the trash. Fail!
posted by BuddhaInABucket at 10:46 AM on May 20, 2009 [3 favorites]

I wish I hadn't Verbinden-ed.
posted by Joe Beese at 10:52 AM on May 20, 2009

Since I can't bloody link to it, I'll just retype it here:

From: [e-mail]
To: [redacted]
Date: 11.01.2007
Subject: Nose Enlargement

Hey Dude,

Ever wanted a bigger penis, but all the enlargement pills didn't work? Don't worry, fella, we got good news for YOU.
Since all ladies believe in the german saying ,,As big as the nose of a man, as big his Johannes" all you'll ever need to get any woman to go to bed with you is a big nose. They won't recognize it's a fake until they're in the lovenest with you and then - you know it - it's already too late;)

So go with us and give us YOUR order of nose enlargement pills today. They come in a box of 5 pillsfor only 40 Dollars if You order today. Give it a try!

The Coolman99

Newski Proskuri 26,
24181286
St. Petersburg


Explains the Humpty Hump, doesn't it?
posted by ooga_booga at 10:52 AM on May 20, 2009

I can't recall how to say, "Don't fucking resize my fucking browser you fucking fucks!" [in German] Any ideas?

No, but I bet it's one really long word: Fenstersizewechslerarschloch!
posted by rokusan at 10:58 AM on May 20, 2009 [7 favorites]

You know who else wanted to resize your browser window without your permission....?
posted by fijiwriter at 10:58 AM on May 20, 2009 [4 favorites]

I love this.
posted by tiny crocodile at 10:58 AM on May 20, 2009

Except I can't recall how to say, "Don't fucking resize my fucking browser you fucking fucks!" Any ideas?

I've never understood the rage at this. So disproportionate.

Very neat site. It's so depressing how some people can't appreciate a little magic and get hung up on practicalities.
posted by smackfu at 11:03 AM on May 20, 2009

Out of curiosity, I hit the jobs link and the Senior Planner gig: "You will be the sparring partner of the very best creative in the country." heh-heh-heh.
posted by njbradburn at 11:04 AM on May 20, 2009

This is a website that only Xzibit could have designed.
posted by shii at 11:08 AM on May 20, 2009

"Don't fucking resize my fucking browser"

I've never understood the rage at this. So disproportionate.

I see what you did there.
posted by rokusan at 11:10 AM on May 20, 2009

Zooming in to find the dead body in the trash in the trash was a nice touch.
posted by You Should See the Other Guy at 11:18 AM on May 20, 2009

Except I can't recall how to say, "Don't fucking resize my fucking browser you fucking fucks!" Any ideas?

I'm German and I could tell you. But I much prefer the Yahoo babelfish version:

"Nicht bumsender Don bestimmen meinen verdammt Browser Sie bumsende Bumsen die Größe neu!"
posted by Hairy Lobster at 11:26 AM on May 20, 2009 [2 favorites]

Except I can't recall how to say, "Don't fucking resize my fucking browser you fucking fucks!" Any ideas?

Well, Babelfish says, "Nicht bumsend meinen, verdammt Browser die Größe neu zu bestimmen tun Sie bumsende Bumsen!" (I appreciate the nice, polite use of the formal Sie, but "bumsen" means "bang" so it isn't a direct translation.)

If you translate that back from German to English Babelfish says, "Condemn browsers mean the size not bumsend to determine again do you bumsende Bumsen!" Which has a certain poetry.

It's more like "Meine fickliche Browser nicht Größe verändern, sie fickliche fickeren."
posted by kirkaracha at 11:33 AM on May 20, 2009 [3 favorites]

In chrome it doesn't resize your browser, or show much of anything.
posted by caddis at 11:35 AM on May 20, 2009

I'd say something like "Verfickt nochmal, verändert meine verfickte Browsergröße nicht, ihr verfickten Ficker." It's not a strict translation, but I can't think of a direct translation of "don't fucking resize" that preserves the amount of fuck.
posted by erdferkel at 11:46 AM on May 20, 2009 [1 favorite]

Germans play Grabarz too?
posted by Cranberry at 11:47 AM on May 20, 2009 [3 favorites]

Boring, what you want is one of these.
posted by Artw at 11:48 AM on May 20, 2009

Also, flash? Pff... come on, show us your JS skillz.
posted by Artw at 11:50 AM on May 20, 2009 [3 favorites]

"Except I can't recall how to say, "Don't fucking resize my fucking browser you fucking fucks!" Any ideas?"

So grammatisch wie möglich: "Wechsle die Größe meine Browsers nicht, du verfickte Ficken!"

Aber eigentlich sind viele englische Schimpfwörter nicht immer zu übersetzen, wie (zum Beispiel) "fuck".
posted by dunkadunc at 11:52 AM on May 20, 2009

Many years ago I was working in a tech support department for a dial-up ISP, and because it was a small shop that we took a lot of pride in, we tried to do everything for as cheap as possible so that any additional spare money could be put into upgrading our machines.

As such, we didn't want to buy a Mac OS9 machine for troubleshooting because we didn't get enough calls for it to warrant the cost, but whenever we did get them, the non-Mac users were always lost.

We tried providing screen shots and text descriptions, but none of that ever helped, so lacking a better idea, I built a virtual Mac completely out of HTML. For being almost completely created using layers and .gif screenshots from my machine at home, it actually worked pretty damn well (everything was clickable, and all the menus and sub menus worked).

It would have sucked to use over dial-up, but on the office LAN it worked great. I'd love to have been able to do it like this though, the fact that the dock magnifies on mouseover was nicely done.

I should see if I still have that somewhere...
posted by quin at 11:58 AM on May 20, 2009 [1 favorite]

Ok. They have me addicted to this now. Great!
posted by psylosyren at 12:00 PM on May 20, 2009

And I spent a little too much time trying to figure out what this was all about.
posted by itstheclamsname at 12:09 PM on May 20, 2009

You skipped a version of OS X, Deutschlanders.
posted by christhelongtimelurker at 12:14 PM on May 20, 2009

Browser-resizing Deutschbags!
posted by Ratio at 12:29 PM on May 20, 2009

ugh
Apple
posted by Zambrano at 12:40 PM on May 20, 2009

Explains the Humpty Hump, doesn't it?

Best part of the video: "Yeah my nose is big...big like a pickle." Humpty says, holding a gherkin and nodding knowingly.
posted by Ian A.T. at 12:42 PM on May 20, 2009

how does this NOT get some kind of takedown notice from Apple?
posted by leotrotsky at 1:01 PM on May 20, 2009

That was incredibly well done.
posted by fightorflight at 1:07 PM on May 20, 2009

I thought ß was no longer used?
posted by Artw at 1:14 PM on May 20, 2009

You can switch to English by clicking the text that says "Deutch" or however it's spelled.

Yeah, that totally makes sense.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 1:27 PM on May 20, 2009

Pepsi Blau?
posted by Joey Michaels at 2:15 PM on May 20, 2009

I thought ß was no longer used?

It still is, just not as often.
posted by jedicus at 2:32 PM on May 20, 2009

WTF! Wow, cool. So does this replicate your desktop for everyone, or have the somehow cloned mine?
posted by Elmore at 2:32 PM on May 20, 2009

Jeßuß!
posted by Elmore at 2:33 PM on May 20, 2009

jessuss?
posted by Artw at 2:46 PM on May 20, 2009

Another little detail is that if you go back to it you get different users (or I guess if you remember a user when you "logged in", you could manually select).
posted by djgh at 2:46 PM on May 20, 2009

Oh, and I also found myself using Mac shortcuts, like cmd-w.

Yeah, just closed the browser tab.

*facepalm*
posted by djgh at 2:47 PM on May 20, 2009 [3 favorites]

jessuss?

yessuss.
posted by Elmore at 3:30 PM on May 20, 2009

Ja, fickt es.
posted by jet_silver at 7:30 PM on May 20, 2009

I like this gem from the firm's contact list:

Anne-Marie Jezuita, the finance manager, faux AddressBook note says "she has no idea how much this website cost."
posted by webhund at 7:45 PM on May 20, 2009 [2 favorites]

apparently they couldn't be bothered of thinking of something original so they ripped off an existing concept.

I actually know these guys personally and rest assured they usually are quite the original bunch (and most are nice folks). but yeah, browser rezising sucks and the site isn't really all that easy to use.

I can't recall how to say, "Don't fucking resize my fucking browser you fucking fucks!" [in German] Any ideas? No, but I bet it's one really long word: Fenstersizewechslerarschloch!
not quite but nice try.

Aber eigentlich sind viele englische Schimpfwörter nicht immer zu übersetzen, wie (zum Beispiel) "fuck".
Ach, die Amerikaner benutyen 'fuck' wie wir 'Scheiße.'
posted by krautland at 4:01 AM on May 21, 2009

Benutyen! Ist das wegen der Rechtschreibungsreform von 2009??
posted by dunkadunc at 4:06 AM on May 21, 2009

Ach, die Amerikaner benutyen 'fuck' wie wir 'Scheiße.'

That would explain all the German scat porn.
posted by backseatpilot at 5:38 AM on May 21, 2009

Is this something I'd have to have a Mac to understand?
posted by deborah at 11:18 PM on May 21, 2009