This is what Gutenberg must have felt.

June 18, 2009 3:58 PM

Michigan Congressman @petehoekstra: "Iranian twitter activity similar to what we did in House last year when Republicans were shut down in the House." The response, from the series of tubes? 21st century sarcasm mixed with a hint of cyberwarfare.
posted by mark242 (52 comments total)

At least he didn't call it twitter-related program activities.
posted by Pants! at 4:05 PM on June 18, 2009

TPM collected a few of the best Twitter responses.
posted by Jaltcoh at 4:07 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]

I made a comment in a MetaFilter thread. This is what Shakespeare must have felt like.
posted by allen.spaulding at 4:08 PM on June 18, 2009 [8 favorites]

Political hyperbole?

*shocked face*
posted by GuyZero at 4:08 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]

God damn: Panetta comments on Cheney somewhere between disappointing and outragous.Leon, don't get dragged into this!Focus on morale in CIA.


Also, what a difference ten days makes: Is Time magazine right? Twitter changing the world? Having an impact yes, fundamentally changing? I don't think so.
posted by boo_radley at 4:09 PM on June 18, 2009

I can't view the "cyberwarfare" link without logging in. Now I know what segregation was like.
posted by DecemberBoy at 4:09 PM on June 18, 2009 [19 favorites]

And now: http://hoekstraisameme.com/. Same site though.
posted by GuyZero at 4:11 PM on June 18, 2009

Hoekstra might like twistori.
posted by netbros at 4:13 PM on June 18, 2009

Working cyberwarfare link.
posted by Foci for Analysis at 4:15 PM on June 18, 2009

Actually, we should probably update their link to new URL.

Hoekstra is a total nutball. He had thought WMD were in Iraq for a long time after everyone else gave up on the idea, and he's one of Joe Kline's sources.

I'll say one nice thing about Twitter. It really exposes how fucking stupid so many of our senators and representatives are.
posted by delmoi at 4:15 PM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]

Ugh, I obviously failed at the funny. Now I know how Dane Cook feels.
posted by Foci for Analysis at 4:18 PM on June 18, 2009 [16 favorites]

Michigan Congressman @petehoekstra has a weird name.
posted by gman at 4:20 PM on June 18, 2009

Also, I don't actually think that because many Iranians are using Twitter it means that twitter is some revolutionary thing. It's just the most convent, because they worked out deals with the telecom companies to avoid paying text messaging fees. In fact, twitter doesn't represent progress, but decline. On the 'regular' internet, anyone could setup a blog that broadcast over IM, but it can't be sent to phones because of the monopoly powers the phone companies have managed to get for themselves. Twitter is an artifact of the sealing off of the internet as it moved into the Mobile space.

On the other hand, as smart phones become more popular, more and more people will be able to use the "regular" internet and the need for twitter will dissipate. Of course, since twitter is free and has no advertising there's no reason not to use it, but that doesn't mean it's anything special.
posted by delmoi at 4:22 PM on June 18, 2009 [5 favorites]

I don't have a MeFi spouse. I'm just like a Shaolin monk.
posted by Stylus Happenstance at 4:23 PM on June 18, 2009

I'll say one nice thing about Twitter talking. It really exposes how fucking stupid so many of our senators and representatives are.

You can get dumb soundclips from most public figures, if you listen long enough. The nice thing about twitter is that all information is delivered in direct-link-ready newsbite form.
posted by filthy light thief at 4:29 PM on June 18, 2009

That's always been the way I like to experience a revolution: 140 characters at a time.
posted by jamstigator at 4:33 PM on June 18, 2009

I don't have a MeFi spouse. I'm just like a Shaolin monk.

Aha, but you do. You lied to us, and I now can empathize with Jack Handey's son.
posted by filthy light thief at 4:34 PM on June 18, 2009

Reading hoekstra's comment made my head hurt, now i know how jeebus felt w/crown thorns.
posted by billysumday at 4:38 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]

Kind of related: Hoobastank goatse's Iran protesters with twitter
posted by Damn That Television at 4:39 PM on June 18, 2009

submitted to Tweetingtoohard.com.
posted by TrialByMedia at 4:42 PM on June 18, 2009

There's a lot of ex-military in government. Certainly someone can tackle these dumb old farts and take away their Blackberries, yes?
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 4:44 PM on June 18, 2009

I glanced at my friends computer while Outlook was open. Now I know how what it's like to be President Bush.
posted by ShadowCrash at 4:48 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]

To be fair, his spokesman did clarify the situation (CNN):

Congressman Hoekstra did not compare the ongoing violence in Iran to when Democrats shut down the House chamber during the energy debate last summer," said spokesman Dave Yonkman. "The two situations do share the similarity of government leadership attempting to limit debate and deliberation, and the ability of new technologies to bypass their efforts and allow for direct communication. That’s the only point that he was trying to make.

So, really, he wasn't saying that the situations were similar, however, the situations are actually very similar. Now I know how the victims of the Great Molasses Flood felt.
posted by swell at 4:53 PM on June 18, 2009 [3 favorites]

Shut up, Peter Hoekstra, you are a traitor to American society and the Constitution and we wish you would die and/or leave the country.

Now you know what liberals feel like.
posted by DU at 5:00 PM on June 18, 2009 [20 favorites]

Kind of related: Hoobastank goatse's Iran protesters with twitter

This is people should be leery of retweeting anything from Iranians unless they know what "I am a douchebag! RT #iranelection" looks like in Farsi.
I'm talking to you rainnwilson. Although I kind of approve of him doing that because that is something I could imagine Dwight Schrute doing.
posted by Dr. Zira at 5:08 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]

^ Wow, Hoobastank really are as fucking lame as that awful song made them seem.
posted by autodidact at 5:09 PM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]

^ Wow, Hoobastank really are as fucking lame as that awful song made them seem.

Now they know what it's like to be Sarah Palin.
posted by Dr. Zira at 5:17 PM on June 18, 2009 [4 favorites]

I prefer Pete Hoekstra's much more entertaining brother, Ren Hoekstra.
posted by wendell at 5:19 PM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]

^ Wow, Hoobastank really are as fucking lame as that awful song made their name makes them seem.
posted by item at 5:20 PM on June 18, 2009

and that awful song.
posted by item at 5:20 PM on June 18, 2009

I just got finished laughing at a contestant on Jeopardy! mentioning Hoobastank and how embarrassed she must be to admit to knowing them, and now this? What a great coincidence.

Now I know what that guy who got struck by lightning twice felt.
posted by Lemurrhea at 5:26 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]

And I was just starting to feel guilty about comparing GWB to Hitler. Thanks, Pete!

Now I know how it fees to get free tickets to a Hoobastank concert.
posted by wendell at 5:35 PM on June 18, 2009

Can we mix memes?

My coworkers pc was playing music when I left work. Now I know what it's like to have keyboard cat play you off.
posted by ShadowCrash at 5:40 PM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]

I glanced at my friends computer while Outlook was open. Now I know how what it's like to be President Bush.

No, no. The idea is to exaggerate.
posted by EarBucket at 5:51 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]

I just joined a fraternity and engaged in continual binge drinking until I damaged my brain to the point that I have the mind of an 8 year old. Now I know what it feels like to be a Hoobastank fan.

God, just reading that name pisses me off. I mean, you read it and you know exactly what they are without knowing anything about them. You know that they are favored by date-rapin' fratboy dude-brahs, you know exactly the kind of shitty middle-of-the-road music they play, you know everything you need to. And just look at them. Have you ever wanted to punch anyone in their fucking idiot face more than you've wanted to punch that jizzmop on the far left? Everything about them is infuriating.
posted by DecemberBoy at 5:51 PM on June 18, 2009 [8 favorites]

Man, this could be quite confusing when one of our commanders on the ground in Afganistan, who happens to have a lisp, is under heavy attack by terr'rists and yells out to his troops, "Retweet! Retweet!" And they all whip out their Blackberries and iPhones and get killed.
posted by jamstigator at 5:53 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]

I did not participate in this Internet-based meme. I feel normal.
posted by dw at 6:03 PM on June 18, 2009

Started breathing through my mouth. Now I know what metafilter users feel like.
posted by MiltonRandKalman at 6:04 PM on June 18, 2009 [2 favorites]

I'm really curious as to whether Hoekstra actually manages his own Twitter feed - I can't decide if it would make it better or worse if it was his (apparently dimwitted) press secretary who actually came up with that moment of WTF.
posted by naoko at 6:15 PM on June 18, 2009

I got a tattoo I don't like. Now I know what it's like to be a holocaust survivor.
posted by stavrogin at 6:16 PM on June 18, 2009 [17 favorites]

I have no idea what Hoobastank feels like. Wait--maybe kinda slick and greasy.
posted by box at 6:17 PM on June 18, 2009

I did not participate in this Internet-based meme. I feel normal. my life is average.
posted by dw

ftfy
posted by ShadowCrash at 6:23 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]

It just goes to show, you can't be too careful.

No, wait...
posted by pompomtom at 6:35 PM on June 18, 2009

Michigan's politicians are about as bankrupt as the auto industry.
posted by HuronBob at 6:45 PM on June 18, 2009

I know what your mom felt like last night.
posted by Krrrlson at 8:18 PM on June 18, 2009

Hoekstra is a total nutball. He had thought WMD were in Iraq for a long time after everyone else gave up on the idea

And he's the genius who had a nuclear primer put online.
posted by homunculus at 8:30 PM on June 18, 2009

i've been to pete hoekstra's congressional district; it's a lot like touring hell, only duller
posted by pyramid termite at 10:27 PM on June 18, 2009

Hoekstra
Eponymously named for Congressman Peter Hoekstra's tactless tweet (since removed) comparing the GOP to the protests in Tehran as being similar:
@petehoekstra Iranian twitter activity similar to what we did in House last year when Republicans were shut down in the House
The Hoekstra appeared as a spontaneous ridiculing emerged as tweets in Twitter:
Missed lunch today cuz I was late and walking to a mting. Reminded me of the Bataan Death March.
Walked out onto Constitution Ave in D.C. and was almost hit by a taxi. Reminded me of Tienanmen Square.
Walked by a lady with too much perfume. It reminded me of the gas chambers.
just lost a game of badminton to my sister. Reminded me of the Normandy landings.
My softball game was rained out today. Now I know what Hurricane Katrina felt like.
Had to move all my stuff to a new office w/o a corner view. Now i know what the Trail of Tears was like.
I got a splinter in my hand today. Felt just like Jesus getting nailed to the cross.
Someone walked in on me while I was in the bathroom. Reminded me of Pearl Harbor.
Got drop of water up my nose in the shower. Reminded me of waterboarding at Guantanamo.
hanging out in my boxers. this must be what the khmer rouge was like.
woke up 30 minutes before my alarm. Reminded me of Guantanamo.
One time when I was in day care a boy kicked the block towers I and another girl built and then walked away, much like 9/11.
woke up today, had some cereal. I can now relate to the holocaust.
Didn't leave a tip for that jerk waitress. Reminded me of the American Revolution.
My garage door opener didn't work this morn. Had to open it by hand. It was just like the dismantling of the Berlin Wall.
Stubbed my toe this morning. Made me think of what it must have been like in Burma during the protests there.
it is really hot and humid today. Now I know what it was like at Mei Lei
Just got into a snowball fight. Reminded me of the Hundred Years' War
I got a sunburn last weekend. Sad. Makes me think of Hiroshima.
had to do some yard work. Reminded me what the a concentration camp must be like
I just realized I forgot to order lunch. Reminded me of the 5 Year Plans under Stalin.
Ran out of mashed potato while hosting guests. Reminded me of the potato famine.
fell off my surfboard in Malibu today, now I know what D-day felt like.
whoops, got a little belly button lint. this is eerily reminiscent of darfur.^
posted by caddis at 11:44 PM on June 18, 2009 [1 favorite]

Weren't the Republicans all about bomb-bomb-bombing Iran six months ago? What an asshole.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 12:23 AM on June 19, 2009

bomb-bomb-bombing Iran

Bomb bomb bomb bomb bomb Iran
Bomb bomb bomb bomb bomb Iran
Bomb bomb bomb bomb bomb Iran

i am so sorry
posted by DecemberBoy at 6:30 AM on June 19, 2009 [1 favorite]

Weren't the Republicans all about bomb-bomb-bombing Iran six months ago? What an asshole.

They still are. That's how you spread freedom and democracy. You bomb the fuck out of people until there's nothing left but freedom and democracy.
posted by saulgoodman at 8:54 AM on June 19, 2009 [1 favorite]

SC state senator compares Iranian protests to right-wing tea parties.
posted by homunculus at 3:22 PM on June 19, 2009