Join 3,421 readers in helping fund MetaFilter (Hide)


Vive la California!
June 15, 2001 11:43 AM   Subscribe

Vive la California! France passed by California in rankings of world economies.
posted by msacheson (21 comments total)

 
Well, it had to happen. California has good wines but France doesn't have good surf. Also, France is full of nuclear reactors whereas California is now powered by gerbil exercise wheels. Are we green or what?
posted by jfuller at 12:03 PM on June 15, 2001


Why doesn't California secede from the Union and demand U.S. aid to address its energy crisis? Every other country is successful at getting hand-outs, why not California?
posted by fleener at 12:15 PM on June 15, 2001


When I get treated like crap and abused, I like it be by a uniformed official with big stick, rather than by some pissy waitress.
Viva la California, indeed!
posted by dong_resin at 12:17 PM on June 15, 2001


Fleener, don't give Larry Ellison any ideas...
posted by machaus at 12:26 PM on June 15, 2001


I can't understand why California doesn't secede right now. Look at these benefits!

1) No need to spend much on military, simply use the CHips - headed up by Commander Larry Wilcox and General Erik Estrada as a as an elite defense force; block entrances to the "country" with motorcycles

2) Huge Foreign Aid Checks from the US Government Threaten talks with China if they don't cough
up the dough.

3) Levy big taxes on "outsiders," coming in for quick sneak peaks at the West Coast.

4) Election for California President would be between Democratic Party and Green Party.

5) Build instant California Navy by seizing San Diego.

6) Watching Bush call you a "rouge nation" on CNN.

7) Make Cuppertino your capital and ban Microsoft products from entering the country.

8) Every year the 49's would play either the Chargers or the Raiders in the SuperBowl, bringing the football
season to two games.

9) World leaders would not be embarrased by President Davis. Although they may be asleep.
posted by brucec at 12:41 PM on June 15, 2001


I remember a series of blind taste tests that French experts did between Californian and French wines. They were furious to discover that they had rated the Californian offerings tops and in tests over the following years consistently did so.
posted by Joe Hutch at 12:45 PM on June 15, 2001


The last secession also had a President Davis. Hmmm eerie coincidence? I think NOT!
posted by fooljay at 1:25 PM on June 15, 2001


seriously, about a month ago i proposed a great idea to some friends on a camping trip: not only have CA secede, but take most of the west with it (for good measure...) let's see...everything west of (and including)Montana, Wyoming, Colorado, and New Mexico.

the reasoning? this country is too east-coast centric. we need a government that's a little more west coast style. laid back, that actually listens when the people speak and vote(medicinal marijuana, anyone?)...ok, there are a few conservative states in that mix (yikes, Utah), but variety is good. truth be told, i don't know that they would miss us much at first...

capital: San Francisco. We can call ourselves West United States. Or New United States.

Yea baby! Vive la West!
posted by queenkelly at 1:55 PM on June 15, 2001



"And in other news today, the californo is up against the euro and the yen...."


Fooljay: and both of the Presidents named Davis were Gray......hmmm...
posted by brucec at 1:57 PM on June 15, 2001


queenkelly

Patience. Do you know nothing of statehood? Patience.

First you need to form the California Republic, citing irreconcible differences with the Bush administration. Then you build up an army, just for "defense" mind you. Then you start some trouble with Nevadans on the border, then you say there trouble makers and declare war on them, making it necessary to annex the whole state. Then repeat the steps for Wyoming, Utah, Montana, etc. Send the California Navy up to Seattle and seize it, demanding that the members of Pearl Jam defect. ... the possibilities are endless, but patience...
.
posted by brucec at 2:03 PM on June 15, 2001


1) Take World's 5th largest economy.
2) Make it an essential banking and financial center the entire planet is dependent on.
3) Place it on a fault line.
4) Sit around, whistle, twiddle thumbs.
posted by mrbula at 2:55 PM on June 15, 2001


queenkelly: Sounds like a good idea, let's take the west with us and create a new supercountry.

Except Utah. They can have Utah.
posted by mathowie at 3:07 PM on June 15, 2001


Yeah, it would be a rouge nation, wouldn't it?
posted by Mo Nickels at 3:52 PM on June 15, 2001


Anything which cuts France down to size makes me happy.
posted by ParisParamus at 3:56 PM on June 15, 2001


Yeah, it would be a rouge nation, wouldn't it?


Much like our local movie theater listing the movie "moulin rogue"...

of course:

10) The Baldwins and Barbara Streisand won't need to sell their houses and move to France anymore...
posted by gyc at 3:58 PM on June 15, 2001


you say there trouble makers and declare war on them, making it necessary to annex the whole state. Then repeat the steps for Wyoming, Utah, Montana, etc.

(Twitch, twitch) Don't be fer claimin' us jus' yet (twitch, twitch). We got sompin' that we just mailed ya' (heh, heh). Caleeforneye-ahh, the capital? I dont think so! (heh, heh). They want them taxes and road taxes and kid taxes and other taxes...(heh, heh) They want our parks and our water and our gasessses and our power AND THEY WANT TA TAKE OUR GUNS AND HUNTIN AND KILLIN AWAY FROM US (heh, heh). Spose they want our road signs 't'out holes too. Don't think so. Deer crossin'? No way! GUT SHOOT "EM AT 'DE BORDER!!!!!
{Paid for by your happy, smiling, and joyful Montana malitia, otherwise known as as Freemen}
posted by Wulfgar! at 4:46 PM on June 15, 2001


Actually Biarritz, France, has decent surf. Even former World Champion (and California native) Tom Curren lives there.
posted by FPN at 5:40 PM on June 15, 2001


well, you know, cascadia has been talking secession for years....

you also have your state of jefferson, and your run-of-the-mill california secessionists and party.

me? I'm with the cascadians.- rcb
posted by rebeccablood at 5:52 PM on June 15, 2001


On highway 5 in southern Oregon there is a "Highway Maintained by the State of Jefferson" sign. I always thought that was pretty cool.
posted by modofo at 5:58 PM on June 15, 2001


Texas has been trying this since the Civil War. If California succeeds in secession before Texas does, [bad english accent] I for one shall be very put out.
posted by ZachsMind at 10:35 PM on June 15, 2001


1) Take World's 5th largest economy.
2) Make it an essential banking and financial center the entire planet is dependent on.
3) Place it on a fault line.
4) Sit around, whistle, twiddle thumbs.


Just between me and everyone else in this thread, I believe that that is the real reason that Matt moved Mefi to the other coast... The cat goes next.
posted by fooljay at 8:41 PM on June 16, 2001


« Older Why are you in such a bad mood?...  |  Communists infiltrating the Oa... Newer »


This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments