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Every boy band has a creepy older guy with weird facial hair
January 22, 2010 2:48 PM   Subscribe

Joe Mande of Look At This Fucking Hipster (previously) made an audition tape for Perez Hilton's new boy band.
posted by minifigs (45 comments total) 2 users marked this as a favorite

 
look at this fucking guy who hates everything and thinks it makes him cool
posted by nathancaswell at 2:51 PM on January 22, 2010 [6 favorites]


and by "guy" i mean "asshole whose face i want to curb"
posted by nathancaswell at 2:55 PM on January 22, 2010


I think you should curb your aggression to this young man!
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 3:01 PM on January 22, 2010 [2 favorites]


I hate everyone and everything. That's what makes me cool, or a jerk, I forget which.
posted by peppito at 3:05 PM on January 22, 2010


I still don't get the deal with this fucking blog. It's a tumblr that updated daily for two months in 2009. Why does everyone care about it?

not hipster-ist
posted by The Bridge on the River Kai Ryssdal at 3:09 PM on January 22, 2010


or wait does that make me

aw crud

posted by The Bridge on the River Kai Ryssdal at 3:09 PM on January 22, 2010


check out the hipster beard.
posted by mrgrimm at 3:53 PM on January 22, 2010


Wow, there's a lot of negativity here. I don't think LATFH is about hating everything at all - it's about hating hipsters. It's the same thing as writing a blog about how much you hate being stuck in traffic or the sound of rusty nails being scraped over a chalkboard. Kinda banal, but not really worthy of the world-class hate it's getting here.

Plus, pictures are fun to look at.
posted by Consonants Without Vowels at 3:58 PM on January 22, 2010 [1 favorite]


...Unless he's being ironic and he doesn't really hate hipsters. In that case he should be burned at the stake.
posted by Consonants Without Vowels at 3:59 PM on January 22, 2010


someone please explain the enigmatic beeeeeeeaaaans


invent something amusing an it please you
posted by fleetmouse at 4:01 PM on January 22, 2010 [1 favorite]


Well, if I can get the fat to hatin' the lean
That'd tickle me more than anything I've seen,
Then get the colors to fightin' one another,
And friend against friend, and brother... and sister against brother,
That'll be just it.
Everybody's brains a-boilin' in turpentine,
And their teeth fallin' out all up and down the streets,
That'll just suit me fine.
posted by benzenedream at 4:11 PM on January 22, 2010 [1 favorite]


It's the same thing as writing a blog about how much you hate being stuck in traffic or the sound of rusty nails being scraped over a chalkboard. Kinda banal, but not really worthy of the world-class hate it's getting here.

It's offensive on its premise, which is that people who look different should be mocked. It's different than hating to get stuck in traffic or to do your taxes.
posted by mrgrimm at 4:28 PM on January 22, 2010 [1 favorite]


i dunno, this guy finds pictures on the web of people wearing like tight jeans and glasses he dislikes, then he plasters their picture on his blog, says something "cutting" about it and prints an effing book... it's just obnoxious, i can't explain it. he accuses everyone of being trite and obsessed with style... by being trite and obsessed with style. the lunacy of it just pisses me off. there are pictures on there that are just kids in the parking lot of a waffle house going to get some fucking waffles. what is the goddamn problem? or there's one where there's a kid digging with a shovel with the caption "this blue collar work isn't so bad" or some shit... what the fuck? you don't know where this person came from. you have a goddamned blog about hipsters and you're ironically applying for perez hilton's boy band and you're trying to trash people for not being blue collar? are you fucking kidding me? has the whole world gone made? am i the only one left who gives a fuck about the rules? what the fuck.
posted by nathancaswell at 4:28 PM on January 22, 2010 [9 favorites]


has the whole world gone made?

Yeah, the whole thing's pretty much 'made'.
posted by Pecinpah at 4:38 PM on January 22, 2010


Kinda banal, but not really worthy of the world-class hate it's getting here.

In my case, at least, the world-class hate is inspired by its popularity, not in general but among my friends and acquaintances. Like Twilight and FMyLife, I'd be completely fine with it if other people didn't think the thing was worth bringing up in otherwise fun, engaging conversations.

I mean, I don't mind the whole hipster thing myself. I have a few friends who I guess fall under some hipster stereotype, just like I have one or two who still come across as goth and emo. My policy's that if you're a fun, interesting person, I don't care what you choose to identify as, so long as it doesn't get in the way of your personality.

Furthermore: When I was in high school, the first time I got into music that wasn't Now That's What I Call Music or Green Day was when my English Teacher lent me a copy of the Decemberists' debut album, which I promptly fell in love with; the rest of my high school music experience was largely indie rock because it was good stuff and because I didn't know enough to really branch out.

Considering the Decemberists are perhaps the most-hated indie rock band on the planet (er, except for Animal Collective), I kind of get bristled and defensive when people bash on indie music or twee or hipsters in general. I find that bashing anything is generally worse than the thing is itself, and LATFH is no different.

But more than Twilight or FMyLife or the many other things people inexplicably decide to talk to me about, LATFH is just obnoxiously smug and hypocritical. Every hipster on the planet reads it and sneers at the hipsters on it. For a blog that runs on Tumblr (its blog theme was designed by fucking David Karp, one of the members at the heart of the NY trendster scene) and has glossy Twitter/Facebook buttons on it and is colored bright blue with diagonal stripes, the guy behind this sure is content to feed on other people's hating and every smug asshole nowadays seems to focus on hipster hate. I blame this blog irrationally.

The other thing I really dislike is that its comments are a mix of snarky and hurtful. Lots of pictures of people that don't look hipsterish with just vicious commentary. Maybe I'm overly sensitive, but when I see that I think of the times I've gotten offended at a personal jab online and then imagine what it would be like to be mocked on a trendy site without a heart.

Of course, all that would be excused if the site were clever or well-done, but it's not. I'm not surprised to find that the guy behind the web site is a bland snot without a sense of comic timing.
posted by Rory Marinich at 4:40 PM on January 22, 2010 [4 favorites]


You have to admit though, "pretending that I'm about to breakdance" is a great dance move.
posted by cyphill at 4:46 PM on January 22, 2010 [2 favorites]


mrgrimm: It's offensive on its premise, which is that people who look different should be mocked. It's different than hating to get stuck in traffic or to do your taxes.

I don't think it's quite that. If these were pictures of minorities or even just pictures of older people with bad fashion sense it would be absolutely tasteless. But have you looked at the pictures? These people are dressing oddly and provocatively for the sole purpose of prompting people to look at them. I think most of the people listed (this goes especially for the people wearing clothes made out of Pabst boxes) would take little to no real offence if I told them they looked like a weirdo. Either they know they look like an idiot, or it gives them the ego-stroking opportunity to note that they are just sooo avante garde and ahead of the curve and misunderstood. Everyone wins.

Anyone who shows up on that site is going to be the type of person who would be thrilled at being on that site. I think that joking about this is A-OK.
posted by Consonants Without Vowels at 4:50 PM on January 22, 2010 [2 favorites]


I remember twee - and it was nothing like this hipster nonsense.
Hipsters are embarrassing and should be pelted with rotten vegetables. It's like the beatniks but without anything even half interesting to say.
posted by sgt.serenity at 4:59 PM on January 22, 2010 [3 favorites]


It is a source of confusion to me that the noughties era Mods Vs. Rockers is, apparently, Hipsters Vs. Hipsters. Sad.
posted by Jon Mitchell at 5:08 PM on January 22, 2010 [2 favorites]


Y'know, one nice thing about approaching 40 is that you stop caring about this hipsters vs punks vs fratboys vs guidos versus whatever and just learn to focus all your hatred in one concentrated beam on the entire under 35 demographic since it's exclusively populated white narcissistic douchebags who weren't hit enough as children.

also, get off my lawn
posted by jonmc at 5:08 PM on January 22, 2010 [26 favorites]


I hope someone pisses on him until he dies >:)
posted by Damn That Television at 5:11 PM on January 22, 2010 [1 favorite]


white narcissistic douchebags

with, dammit. the narcissistic douchebags come in a wide assortment of colors.
posted by jonmc at 5:12 PM on January 22, 2010


Judging by the hipster hate it may soon be cool to identify as a hipster. If anyone knows what a hipster is, anyway.

Other than people who look like they could have been you.
posted by ersatz at 5:16 PM on January 22, 2010


Oh sheesh, another inane MeFi hipster thread.

omjobs, i'm like so above trendiness and never want to be looked at
posted by defenestration at 5:17 PM on January 22, 2010


These people are dressing oddly and provocatively for the sole purpose of prompting people to look at them.

Either they know they look like an idiot, or it gives them the ego-stroking opportunity to note that they are just sooo avante garde and ahead of the curve and misunderstood. Everyone wins.


If you mock them you're just taking the bait. Ignore them and you win.
posted by Zambrano at 5:28 PM on January 22, 2010


I don't think LATFH is about hating everything at all - it's about hating hipsters

Just scrolling down the front page, it seems to just be hating people. Which I'm OK with, but it doesn't really warrant fame and a book deal.
posted by DU at 5:34 PM on January 22, 2010


Mind you, I do hate people with bright, flashy clothing, especially the sort that pretends like it's from some old, dated era. Match that with whiny voices and an ironic mustache and you've practically got yourself a twee indie rock band right there.
posted by Rory Marinich at 5:44 PM on January 22, 2010 [1 favorite]


I don't hate that blog at all.

It's just like when someone brings up how L.A. and the movie business are populated exclusively by "phonies." It's a supremely effective tool for telling me I don't need to talk to this person anymore, because they have nothing to say that isn't trite, tired, and utterly without merit.
posted by drjimmy11 at 5:46 PM on January 22, 2010


Someone should start "Look at this boring-ass, blending-in, conformist J. Alfred Prufrock-ass motherfucker who never had the balls to express himself in his life and thinks it fun to mock everyone else until on his deathbed he realizes he wasted his life hating other people for no reason instead of actually doing shit."

I would read that blog.
posted by drjimmy11 at 5:50 PM on January 22, 2010 [3 favorites]


Since nobody else has said it I guess I will: based on a quick perusal I'd say the site has a lot more to do with homophobia than anything else. I don't think it would be too tough to make the argument that one of the central aspects of the so-called 'hipster' subculture is the appropriation of formerly homosexual-specific signifiers. I'm not saying that every person in every photo on the site is a homosexual, but what I'm seeing is a mix of laughing at people either for being gay (who probably got enough of that in high school) or berating them for otherwise standing out. Joe Mande seems to have some hangups, what can I say?
posted by mike_bling at 5:57 PM on January 22, 2010 [5 favorites]


Oh and as far as years past freshness date:

Perez Hilton: 2
Mocking hipsters: 3
Parodying boybands: 10*


*When you're doing something Blink 182 did in a video that aired 14 times a day on MTV c. 1999, that's how you know you're on the real cutting edge of comedy.

posted by drjimmy11 at 5:59 PM on January 22, 2010 [1 favorite]


Rory Marinich: I have nothing particular against hipsters. But you know what I really can't stand? The Decemberists. And I bet you listen to a lot of other music that's actually good, and that it's you who is to blame for Pandora insisting that I must lke the goddamn Decemberists. It's you, isn't it Rory. Isn't it.
posted by rusty at 6:15 PM on January 22, 2010


Also, the Sufjan rap was awesome.
posted by rusty at 6:16 PM on January 22, 2010


rusty: Guilty! You know what the cure is, right? Liking the Decemberists.
posted by Rory Marinich at 6:35 PM on January 22, 2010


everyone's hating on hipsters instead of that disgusting excuse of a human being, perez?
posted by june made him a gemini at 7:41 PM on January 22, 2010


Can we please all stop hating hipsters and focus on hating this Joe Mande idiot? Let's stay focused here.
posted by orme at 8:14 PM on January 22, 2010


jonmc: "Y'know, one nice thing about approaching 40 is that you stop caring about this hipsters vs punks vs fratboys vs guidos versus whatever and just learn to focus all your hatred in one concentrated beam on the entire under 35 demographic since it's exclusively populated white narcissistic douchebags who weren't hit enough as children.

also, get off my lawn
posted by jonmc at 8:08 PM on January 22 [6
"

I was with you, even being one of the much maligned under 35 demographic, and even considering that since your are "approaching 40" your hatred beam is also focused on people at most 4 years younger than yourself, until you finished the rhetorical build up with a child abuse punchline.

You're wrong about that part. Hitting kids isn't actually funny, or helpful.
posted by lazaruslong at 9:49 PM on January 22, 2010 [1 favorite]


Mate.
posted by lazaruslong at 9:51 PM on January 22, 2010


The "I'm get ready to break dance move" is pretty awesome, and to his credit he's pretty funny.

I don't know, if hipsters can't laugh at themselves I say fuck 'em anyway.
posted by Skygazer at 12:15 AM on January 23, 2010 [2 favorites]


I'm just happy everybody watched the video before commenting. Joe Mande is the hipster Andrew Sullivan now apparently.
posted by minifigs at 1:33 AM on January 23, 2010


Sometimes I wish there were 25 or even 26 hours in every day, for all the strangling I would like to fit in.
posted by turgid dahlia at 7:21 AM on January 23, 2010 [3 favorites]


I thought it was funny, though it would have been better with less talking and faux-gay-suggestiveness and more demos.
posted by ropeladder at 8:32 AM on January 23, 2010


Wow. Hopefully more of the Internet's meanest, most useless people will become involved in this, and they can all go out to sea in a boat with a hole in it and fucking drown. What's Tucker Max doing these days? Welfare?
posted by DecemberBoy at 9:23 AM on January 23, 2010


You're wrong about that part. Hitting kids isn't actually funny, or helpful.

Heh. Even if it's pointless to respond to someone doing an idiotic macho act, that was a good way to do it.
posted by DecemberBoy at 10:30 AM on January 23, 2010


What's Tucker Max doing these days? Welfare?

He's been on tour promoting his recent film, I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell, which might be one of the most shoddily-produced movies of all time. Kind of a shame, really. I went to an advance screening after lying about being press, and got to interview Tucker and star Matt Czuchry, and they were both surprisingly nice and fun and really overall cool people. Both of them were convinced they were doing something that would make people happier, so perhaps they're not the most sensitive fellows ever but their hearts seemed to be in the right places. Having to talk to him right after seeing the shitheap of a movie they produced was a little awkward.

But I've got a soft spot for Tucker in general. He's an asshole, but he's not spiteful. It's like he's mastered the zen of being a douchebag, and I mean that as a compliment. He also doesn't make up his stories, which I appreciate.
posted by Rory Marinich at 2:45 PM on January 23, 2010


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