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Coming Out Insurance
April 12, 2010 10:59 PM   Subscribe

"When we found out Bobby Jay was gay, we was terrified we'd lose our beautiful home." Because having a gay child can be very expensive.
posted by hippybear (81 comments total) 9 users marked this as a favorite

 
That actually ended up being funnier than I expected it to be when it first started. I am unsure if this has anything to do with the 44oz of Victory at Sea I just drank.
posted by Stunt at 11:08 PM on April 12, 2010 [4 favorites]


I envy you and your Victory. Just sayin'

On the other hand...eh.
posted by lizjohn at 11:24 PM on April 12, 2010


There needs to be some sort of insurance for making a comment on a thread where a Mefite you were pretty sure was gay makes a post with a YouTube video you would have, if someone else had shown it to you, believed he would have been offended by it, because it's full of really-not-that-funny gay jokes. They should call it Color-Me-Confused Insurance, and it will be for people who assume they know more about their fellow Mefites than they actually do based on posting and comment history.
posted by Caduceus at 11:25 PM on April 12, 2010 [22 favorites]


If only they offered insurance for being accepted to an ivy league school... or developing a strong interest in international travel...
posted by amtho at 11:25 PM on April 12, 2010 [1 favorite]


Also there should be insurance for the overuse of hyphens.
posted by Caduceus at 11:29 PM on April 12, 2010


I am unsure if this has anything to do with the 44oz of Victory at Sea I just drank.

You lucky bastard. I had this for the first time 3 weeks ago at a bar in Santa Monica. Now I'm tempted to drive down to San Diego to pick some up since I can't seem to find any in The Valley.
posted by sideshow at 11:49 PM on April 12, 2010


Meh. The spokesman is what ruined it for me. I mean, well, besides the just-had-enough-time-to-memorize-the-script acting. Otherwise I think the joke itself isn't that terribly offensive and it really isn't anyone's place to decide what can be funny to who and why.
posted by june made him a gemini at 11:54 PM on April 12, 2010


OK, maybe I'm supposed to be offended, but wth. Maybe, I guess, possibly --there is a difference between using stereotypes to ignorantly reticule, and making fun of the ignorant stereotypes. This must be the second kind, because it doesn't bother me. Why, it's pretty funny for youtube.
posted by Some1 at 12:01 AM on April 13, 2010


Ah yes, Caduceus... and also.... for ellipses...
posted by amtho at 12:06 AM on April 13, 2010


Is that pregnant lady from Scrubs?
posted by liquorice at 12:40 AM on April 13, 2010


Well, I'll say it: this post is simply BIGOTRY. I can't believe that this kind of "humour" is acceptable on MetaFilter in 2010.

Having worked in insurance all my life, it astonishes me that this ridicule of our industry is tolerated. Insurance and reinsurance are FUNDAMENTAL products in America's financial marketplace - it steams me up to see you philistines chuckling away at financial structures because of their "sophistication" and "complexity" - ignoring that they are completely NORMAL and NATURAL parts of modern society.

I just hope that some of you small-minded people have a son or daughter who grows up to be a Lloyd's "name" or CEO of SwissRe - living with the shame of which will probably make your heads explode.
posted by the quidnunc kid at 12:44 AM on April 13, 2010 [42 favorites]


Perhaps it's the early morning light, the long for a tad more sleep, the fresh coffee in hand, but I was honestly expecting a very serious thing™, and my sleepy brain didn't realize it was a joke until the man at BBQ started talking about insurance. Would it have been funnier if I had watched it all as if it was serious?
posted by dabitch at 12:52 AM on April 13, 2010


@quidnunc: WOULD you STOP being such a DRAMA queen?

I don't think it's funny at ALL. I could have come out DECADES sooner if my parents had COI.
posted by Twang at 12:56 AM on April 13, 2010 [2 favorites]


Having worked in insurance all my life

Insurance is a choice and a lifestyle. Don't be telling me "God" made you that way.
posted by three blind mice at 1:27 AM on April 13, 2010 [15 favorites]


Having worked in insurance all my life

Must've been tough on you as a toddler.
posted by Smart Dalek at 2:52 AM on April 13, 2010 [8 favorites]


I heard there are no insurance agents in Iran. Is that really true?
posted by sexymofo at 3:00 AM on April 13, 2010 [1 favorite]


Sure - turn on me for my anti-hate stance, MetaPhobes. Oppress me and my actuary brothers, my insurance sales-sisters, if you will.

But we are OUT - we are PROUD - we are SUBJECT to regulatory oversight in our state of domicile and in other states where we are licensed to sell insurance - so just GET USED TO IT.
posted by the quidnunc kid at 3:36 AM on April 13, 2010 [21 favorites]


If only they offered insurance for being accepted to an ivy league school... or developing a strong interest in international travel...

Or just being creatively/artistically inclined in general.
posted by philip-random at 4:09 AM on April 13, 2010 [1 favorite]


I have to admit that I've always been curious about insurance, but I just haven't met the right agent yet...
posted by Samizdata at 4:38 AM on April 13, 2010 [11 favorites]


I still object to the genetic argument, it's clear these people CHOOSE to engage in insurance-related acts, and they can just as easily CHOOSE not engaged in insurance-related acts.
posted by leotrotsky at 5:22 AM on April 13, 2010


I have nothing against insurance agents. I just don't see why they have to go around advertising it all the time. I mean, do I LOOK like I want insurance? It's almost like they're recruiting people.
posted by PlusDistance at 5:27 AM on April 13, 2010 [12 favorites]


I like this thread better than the link.
posted by Pope Guilty at 5:28 AM on April 13, 2010 [17 favorites]


Let me preface this with - I'm at work, so I can't view this, but I have to make what is going to be a very, very ugly call to an insurance 'authorization management system' in about five minutes and all I can think of is...I wonder if you need to get prior authorization before coming out (unless it happens in the context of an urgent hospital stay.)
posted by cobaltnine at 5:29 AM on April 13, 2010 [1 favorite]


i felt like i was watching a saturday night live skit. somewhere between when it was funny and most times when it's not.
posted by msconduct at 5:30 AM on April 13, 2010


You can sell whatever insurance you like in the privacy of your own home, JUST STAY AWAY FROM MY KIDS.

Ehr, I mean cats.
posted by wreckingball at 5:38 AM on April 13, 2010


as long as we're trafficking in stereotypes...

Wouldn't it be cheaper to have a lesbian kid? After all, she can can fix your car.
posted by desjardins at 5:38 AM on April 13, 2010 [5 favorites]


I watched the video, and was all set to blast the poster when I saw that it's hippybear. Who is gay.

Sorry, man—this isn't funny. It's just a bunch of lazy, unimaginative gags based on stereotypes so well-worn that they're falling apart. OMG! Gay people like theater! Gay people talk with a FAB-u-lous lisp! Gay people wear women's clothing! Hilarious!

Don't get me wrong; I'll laugh heartily at politically incorrect stuff if it's (a) funny, and (b) actually mocking bigotry by turning it up to 11 and showing how ludicrous it is. This is neither. This is cheap and crude.
posted by ixohoxi at 5:42 AM on April 13, 2010 [3 favorites]


It's just a bunch of lazy, unimaginative gags based on stereotypes
No, it's not just that. It's poking fun at people who fear their children may be gay, and showing how ridiculous that fear is.
posted by fish tick at 5:57 AM on April 13, 2010 [4 favorites]


...as well as laughing at the ludicrous extremes to which the insurance industry goes.
posted by fish tick at 6:01 AM on April 13, 2010 [2 favorites]


I was just thinking that i would get the insurance policy and try to claim on it either way.

"No, he's gay. Gay guys love Playstation9 and heavy metal. What the hell, haven't you heard of Halford? Just give me my money"

I guess my point being that i wouldn't think that having a gay child would be any more expensive then just having a child. For that matter what about the gay people that don't meet your stereotypes? Fem lesbians or my friend David who probably the gayest thing (stereotypically speaking) he does is sex with dudes. Would this (yeah i know, totally fictitious) insurance have some sort of "stereotypes only" clause?
posted by djduckie at 6:10 AM on April 13, 2010


I wish there was YouTube insurance to cover the expense of lost time watching crap videos like this one.
posted by briank at 6:10 AM on April 13, 2010 [2 favorites]


I guess my point being that i wouldn't think that having a gay child would be any more expensive then just having a child.

WINNERWINNERCHICKENDINNER

Having a gay son won't actually cost more than having a straight son, and that's the ONLY reason these people have against not wanting to have a gay son. Therefore, there's no reason to be worried about having a gay son.
posted by 23skidoo at 6:18 AM on April 13, 2010 [2 favorites]


I was just thinking that i would get the insurance policy and try to claim on it either way.

Yeah me too. Everything nice and tasteful could easily be considered gay:

- vintage mid-century modern furniture
- BMW 335
- loft apartment
- nice wines
- etc.

I'd be all over that shit.
posted by jimmythefish at 6:24 AM on April 13, 2010 [2 favorites]


Did you guys know that a reticule is a purse? I didn't.
posted by oddman at 6:28 AM on April 13, 2010 [1 favorite]


Having worked in insurance all my life

I work in insurance too and no one gives a shit.

Snap insurance. Ha!
posted by stormpooper at 6:37 AM on April 13, 2010


The reticule is also the name for the crosshairs (or other lines) in a telescopic sight.
posted by pharm at 6:37 AM on April 13, 2010


I have to admit that I've always been curious about insurance . . .

Don't worry, Samizdata, lots of people are i-curious.
posted by The Bellman at 6:45 AM on April 13, 2010 [14 favorites]


The concept is funnier than the execution.
posted by jefficator at 7:02 AM on April 13, 2010 [2 favorites]


pharm: “The reticule is also the name for the crosshairs (or other lines) in a telescopic sight.

In US English it's generally spelled "reticle," though. Not sure when it became common to drop the 'u'.
posted by Kadin2048 at 7:06 AM on April 13, 2010


IUG
posted by i_cola at 7:12 AM on April 13, 2010


I watched the video, and was all set to blast the poster when I saw that it's hippybear. Who is gay.

Sorry, man—this isn't funny. It's just a bunch of lazy, unimaginative gags based on stereotypes so well-worn that they're falling apart. OMG! Gay people like theater! Gay people talk with a FAB-u-lous lisp! Gay people wear women's clothing! Hilarious!

Don't get me wrong; I'll laugh heartily at politically incorrect stuff if it's (a) funny, and (b) actually mocking bigotry by turning it up to 11 and showing how ludicrous it is. This is neither. This is cheap and crude.


This. Ignorant (regardless of who the creators are-- I have no idea) and unfunny.
posted by threeants at 7:12 AM on April 13, 2010


oddman: "Did you guys know that a reticule is a purse? I didn't."

I dated a lesbian in highschool who was insistent that her little bag full of miscellaneous things was a RETICULE and emphatically NOT A PURSE. Maybe because carrying a purse would not have been very lesbian of her.
posted by idiopath at 7:13 AM on April 13, 2010


In US English it's generally spelled "reticle," though. Not sure when it became common to drop the 'u'.

Sometimes in old novels you'll see it--used in the "purse or bag" sense--spelled "ridicule."
posted by not that girl at 7:23 AM on April 13, 2010


ixohoxi: Sorry, man—this isn't funny. It's just a bunch of lazy, unimaginative gags based on stereotypes so well-worn that they're falling apart. OMG! Gay people like theater! Gay people talk with a FAB-u-lous lisp! Gay people wear women's clothing! Hilarious!

This. THIS THIS THIS.

This video isn't edgy: It's lame. It does nothing but further these dumb stereotypes which do not jive terribly well with my real-world experience (ok, there's that one guy but I think he's just trying too hard.)

Next up: A bunch of white actors in blackface talking about fried chicken insurance. This is getting so old.
posted by dunkadunc at 7:23 AM on April 13, 2010 [1 favorite]


Cats?
posted by Sfving at 7:26 AM on April 13, 2010 [1 favorite]


Clearly I'm seeing this in the wrong light. My first impression was that it was a corny way of poking fun at people afraid of teh gay, and that the use of hackneyed stereotypes was meant as a further belittling of the people afraid of teh gay, because that's how people afraid of teh gay see gays.
Here's an antidote for this old, lame, dumb, lazy, unimaginativeness, then.
posted by fish tick at 7:42 AM on April 13, 2010 [8 favorites]


YEah, I don't think Cats is still being produced.
posted by GuyZero at 7:42 AM on April 13, 2010


Oh come on. Cats is timeless.

I've heard.
posted by ODiV at 8:01 AM on April 13, 2010


It does nothing but further these dumb stereotypes which do not jive terribly well with my real-world experience (ok, there's that one guy but I think he's just trying too hard.)

Johnathan Swift does not want you to eat babies. Randy Newman does not hate short people. Jello Biafra does not advocate killing the poor.

This video (regardless of how funny you think it is) does not promote dumb stereotypes, it mocks them.
posted by 23skidoo at 8:03 AM on April 13, 2010 [5 favorites]


"Now whut the hail is a b'dazzler?!"

"Son, go tek Mommeh's taghts awf!"
posted by toodleydoodley at 8:17 AM on April 13, 2010


Would this (yeah i know, totally fictitious) insurance have some sort of "stereotypes only" clause?

Oh the places you'll go.
posted by shakespeherian at 8:18 AM on April 13, 2010


But did you notice the way the beans conformed to to the precise outline of the plate itself while still maintaining their own beany texture. They are a parody of the plate, but taken to such bean-centric extremes that it's rendered almost unrecognizable. Brilliant.
posted by JeffK at 8:25 AM on April 13, 2010 [2 favorites]


fish tick,, it's not your fault, but your "antidote" link also led me to a "debate of Gay marriage" YT clip from "The View," which had such ignorance on both sides (Whoopi & Joy v. Sherri & Elizabeth) that I could feel my brain cells getting sucked out. It started with Whoopi & Sherri pontificating about the word "black suffrage," defining it as the time that blacks suffered both before & after slavery: lynching, Jim Crow, and so on. I should have looked away, but I couldn't--it was like a 43-car pile up on the freeway; you know it's going to be tragic, but you keep looking for something redeeming...no, I won't link to the clip. It's bad enough that I saw it, and when Joy Behar is the voice of reason....oooooooooh.
posted by beelzbubba at 8:26 AM on April 13, 2010 [1 favorite]


Bigoted or not, this video was just not even that funny.

The related posts I'm getting for this one, however, are simply awesome.
posted by chemoboy at 8:36 AM on April 13, 2010 [1 favorite]


Yeah, White History Day was sort of funny.
posted by idiopath at 8:41 AM on April 13, 2010


fish tick,, it's not your fault ...
Oh, no, it was actually quite intentional - all part of my master plan to celebrate the marginalization of gays and blacks.
posted by fish tick at 8:42 AM on April 13, 2010


djduckie: "Would this (yeah i know, totally fictitious) insurance have some sort of "stereotypes only" clause?"

I don't know, but they could always take their cue from the military.

(On preview, shakespeherian has it.)
posted by metabrilliant at 8:42 AM on April 13, 2010


Throwing a gay perspective out there, I thought it was pretty funny. I'm going to take this a step further than 23skidoo: the video isn't mocking stereotypes, it's actually mocking straight people. Not all straight people, but definitely a healthy subset. While you're busy wondering whether the gays should be offended by the ribbon-dancing nine-year-old, you've conveniently overlooked the six heterosexual characters in the clip, each of whom is about as smart as the carpet. This is pretty much how I see anyone who believes that kind of drivel: wide-eyed, slack-jawed, self-absorbed, and empty-headed. So yes, you bet I laughed.
posted by Help, I can't stop talking! at 8:43 AM on April 13, 2010 [4 favorites]


I thought it was kind of cute, actually. The family with the CONFEDERATE FLAGS was happy to have insurance to drive their son to gymnastics lessons so they could afford it before he became the host of American Idol. How adorable! How often does that ACTUALLY happen? (No really, I want numbers.)

Also: I want insurance in case any of my children ever play hockey. Skates, rink fees, padding, replacement teeth...
posted by grapefruitmoon at 8:56 AM on April 13, 2010


How adorable! How often does that ACTUALLY happen? (No really, I want numbers.)

14.2, and the capital of Nebraska is Lincoln!
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 9:08 AM on April 13, 2010


This video (regardless of how funny you think it is) does not promote dumb stereotypes, it mocks them.

So this it hurts.
posted by i_cola at 9:08 AM on April 13, 2010


I wouldn't have had to choose between ballet and flute lessons... *sniffle*
posted by greekphilosophy at 9:11 AM on April 13, 2010


Johnathan Swift does not want you to eat babies. Randy Newman does not hate short people. Jello Biafra does not advocate killing the poor.

This video (regardless of how funny you think it is) does not promote dumb stereotypes, it mocks them.


Yes, but if your video does such a poor job at mocking stereotypes as this, I'd say the net benefit is still negative. You've got to be funny for it to work.
posted by dunkadunc at 9:12 AM on April 13, 2010 [2 favorites]


Whether or not it "works" is completely separate from how funny it is. I didn't laugh at all when I watched this, but I'm still able to point to the people that are being made fun of in this video. (It's the people who don't want their sons to be gay.)
posted by 23skidoo at 9:25 AM on April 13, 2010


eh, I thought it was mildly funny. But I found the stupidity shown by the cast of "The View" amazing. How did the studio audience not break out into laughter when Whoopi started talking about black suffrage? It reminds me of "the man show" skit on comedy central to end women's suffrage. They could have gotten the entire cast of The View to sign.
posted by Crash at 9:33 AM on April 13, 2010


All right. I've got it. I know what's bugging me about this. Took a while; there's a mess of stereotyping and parody in this that's hard to wade through, and my knees were jerking all over the place for a bit.

My problem with the clip is that it's making fun of parents who want to do right by their gay children.

To me, parents who accept their gay kids are heroes. It's a hard thing to deal with in this societal context, and even the most accepting of parents have to deal with a massive recalibration of their goals for their children and their understanding of what their child's life will be like. The parents who go through their child's coming-out process and end up accepting and supportive are to be admired and revered.

Seeing them portrayed as cardboard cutout stereotypes, ignorant and slack-jawed, bugs the heck out of me.
posted by MrVisible at 9:35 AM on April 13, 2010 [1 favorite]


I'm not into insurance, but I did purchase travel insurance at the airport in Minneapolis once. Just once.
posted by Mcable at 10:09 AM on April 13, 2010


I have renter's insurance. My husband doesn't know. I just never found the right moment to tell him...
posted by internet fraud detective squad, station number 9 at 10:45 AM on April 13, 2010


My problem with the clip is that it's making fun of parents who want to do right by their gay children.

Sort of. But mostly, it's making fun of a kind of dumb earnestness. Well-intentioned on the surface but driven by an inner ignorance/stupidity that I don't mind seeing skewered. Think of it as a kinder gentler version of the various sentiments that start with, "I'm not racist or anything but ... "
posted by philip-random at 10:49 AM on April 13, 2010


I dated a lesbian in highschool who was insistent that her little bag full of miscellaneous things was a RETICULE and emphatically NOT A PURSE. Maybe because carrying a purse would not have been very lesbian of her.

idiopath, I have had beers with you a number of times, now, and I never realized you were a lesbian.
posted by Caduceus at 11:22 AM on April 13, 2010


I like this thread better than the link.

I like that the link inspired the thread.
posted by jvilter at 11:46 AM on April 13, 2010 [2 favorites]


Caduceus: "I never realized you were a lesbian."

I guess I could have said "I dated a kinsey 4 in highschool who was afraid it would make her a 3 if she were carrying a purse" but I figured that would be kind of inside baseball and not nearly as funny. Thanks to internalized bi-phobia she refused identify as anything but "lesbian" though. I was her special exception, that was good enough explanation for me at the time.
posted by idiopath at 11:49 AM on April 13, 2010


but I figured that would be kind of inside baseball and not nearly as funny.

inside softball?
posted by ODiV at 11:53 AM on April 13, 2010


Here's an antidote for this old, lame, dumb, lazy, unimaginativeness, then.

"This video is no longer available due to a copyright claim by TheColonelFrog."
posted by Evilspork at 1:18 PM on April 13, 2010


dupe with some spam
posted by idiopath at 1:50 PM on April 13, 2010


I am a gay. I found this video meh. I was not offended by it. But it also did not make me smile.
posted by Lleyam at 3:14 PM on April 13, 2010


I Think it's ok to criticize a video as being offensive, even if I am not personally offended by it. If the video is unclear about what it is saying, who it is making fun of, or anything like that, I think it's ok to criticize it as being maybe offensive.

There is no such thing as consequence-free free speech, after all, and the consequence of this movie is that I think poorly of whoever made it and whoever else thinks it's funny. However, I am open to changing my opinion.
posted by rebent at 5:06 PM on April 13, 2010


quidnunc, has anyone told you lately that your HAMBURGERS are delicious? this is the second one i've had tonight!
posted by Rube R. Nekker at 7:49 PM on April 13, 2010


I am also a gay. I don't think this thing is as much offensive as it is ridiculous. I mean, a Madonna fan club membership? What is this, 1990?

Actually, if anything's offensive, it's the cluelessly cartoonish Southern redneck stereotypes.
posted by blucevalo at 8:40 PM on April 13, 2010


This video (regardless of how funny you think it is) does not promote dumb stereotypes, it mocks them.

It mocks them in much the same way that Jay Leno mocked George W. Bush during his presidency, which is to say, not much at all. If you want true mockery, why subsist on Jay Leno when you can have Jon Stewart?
posted by blucevalo at 8:49 PM on April 13, 2010 [1 favorite]


I don't have a problem with Insurance Folk, really I don't but why do the have to dress like... wait for it... take a beat ... like Mormons?
posted by sammyo at 4:22 AM on April 14, 2010


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