Skip

You, too, can be a male porn star!
July 20, 2001 12:47 PM   Subscribe

You, too, can be a male porn star! All you need is some Viagra to give you the stamina for a five-scene workday on the set.
posted by msacheson (28 comments total)

 
Um...actually, only half of us can. :-)
posted by jpoulos at 1:00 PM on July 20, 2001


As if. Five scenes in a whole day? That's it?

How could you keep form walking around the set doing your best three-legged stool imitation constantly?
posted by UncleFes at 1:03 PM on July 20, 2001


jpoulos, thanks for clarifying. I'm sure this story would have been bigger news if Viagra could turn women into male porn stars!
posted by msacheson at 1:14 PM on July 20, 2001


Do you think the female porn stars use the Niagra?
posted by UncleFes at 1:16 PM on July 20, 2001




Unfortunately for me, it's my top half.
posted by briank at 1:17 PM on July 20, 2001


I once saw an interview with Ron Jeremy where he pointed out that the hardest part of becoming a pr0n star is psychological. It's one thing to be a superior cocksman in the privacy of your own home or a hotel; it's quite another to perform in front of a film crew that sometimes numbers into the dozens, while taking direction and coaching, dealing with light and sound guys, the occasional camera reload, the stills guy popping off flashbulbs as soon as the director yells cut, the other actors and actresses prepping for their scenes, etc.

Hell, man, I shoo the cat out :)
posted by UncleFes at 1:23 PM on July 20, 2001


"a superior cocksman"?

and men wonder why women don't take them seriously enough. :)
posted by rebeccablood at 1:28 PM on July 20, 2001


I thought it had a certain literary flair :)
posted by UncleFes at 1:33 PM on July 20, 2001


All hail Ron Jeremy (Onion interview) .
posted by msacheson at 1:38 PM on July 20, 2001


All you need is some Viagra

. . . and the requisite porn guy moustache, of course. (see, e.g., Ron Jeremy, supra)
posted by lawtalkinguy at 1:42 PM on July 20, 2001


requisite porn guy moustache

Just shave off the bottoms of those goatees and you are THERE :{D
posted by UncleFes at 1:45 PM on July 20, 2001


What if you get your Viagra, you grow your moustache, but some... shortcomings still remain?
posted by matteo at 2:02 PM on July 20, 2001


Best line of this story?

The last one:

"One result of this harsh Darwinism was that actors who could perform like Superman were often a far cry from looking like Christopher Reeve. "

Well, that's just super. . . man.
posted by ColdChef at 2:02 PM on July 20, 2001


requisite porn guy moustache

The ultimate porn guy moustache was the one that lived on the lip of Harry Reems. (No picture. I couldn't find a picture of him that wasn't pr0n, and I'm at work.)

Also, while we're on the subject, I'd like to take a quick poll. I was with a good friend of mine recently (a woman) and saw a dead ringer for Ron Jeremy walking down the street. She had never heard of him. How many here, whether you've seen his body (of work) or not, know who Ron Jeremy is?
posted by jpoulos at 2:09 PM on July 20, 2001


well, I do now, but I wouldn't have know that he was a porn star if I hadn't read this thread.


wait, wait, wait. is he a short hairy guy? if so, I *have* heard of him someplace, but I wouldn't have recognized the name. famous for being so ordinary?
posted by rebeccablood at 2:13 PM on July 20, 2001


is he a short hairy guy

Yep. His nickname is "the Hedgehog"
posted by UncleFes at 2:16 PM on July 20, 2001


Uh, at least that's what I, er, heard.
posted by UncleFes at 2:18 PM on July 20, 2001


Oh yeah, I'd recognize him anywhere.
posted by msacheson at 2:22 PM on July 20, 2001


"a superior cocksman"?

Shouldn't that be an Expert Wangsman?
posted by DiplomaticImmunity at 2:36 PM on July 20, 2001


I bow to your masterful vocabularistics.
posted by UncleFes at 2:48 PM on July 20, 2001


there's this one scene in this movie with ron jeremy in it that just mad me lose all respect for him (though i'm sure i deserve little respect as well for watching it..)... wish i could go into it, but it'd be just wrong....
posted by lotsofno at 3:18 PM on July 20, 2001


ron jeremy has been in the following non-pr0n films:

Reindeer Games
Citizen Toxie: The Toxic Avenger Part 4
Detroit Rock City
Boondock Saints (o_O)
Ronin
54
Orgazmo
George Wallace
Red Line
Caged Heat 3000
Dracula
Killing Zoe (o_O again)

...

ok, i can't sift thru the movies anymore, i got to 300 and my fingers cramped up.

the man has started in over 1000 porn films, directed over 85 films (blue and regular), was a consultant for Boogie Nights, 52 Pick-Up and Nine 1/2 Weeks.

most notable TV appearances, 'Just Shoot Me', 'Nash Bridges', 'VS.', 'NewsRadio', and the Jerry Springer episode 'I slept with 251 Men in 10 Hours'.

ron jeremy, indeed the most hardest working man in show business.
posted by jcterminal at 3:45 PM on July 20, 2001


pun intended.
posted by jcterminal at 3:50 PM on July 20, 2001


Viagra's revenues continue to grow at a 30+% annual rate... I thought aging Boomers were the reason (Ron Jeremy is an aging Boomer come to think of it).
posted by Chairman_MaoXian at 4:03 PM on July 20, 2001


I met Ron.

At a wedding.

At a wedding presided over by Judge Stanley Sporkin.
posted by NortonDC at 7:25 PM on July 20, 2001


Think of all the poor fluffers that Viagra has put out of work. And where are they going to go with a resume like that?
posted by pracowity at 4:16 AM on July 21, 2001


If any fluffers are reading this, click my profile for my e-mail address, and we'll discuss it.

You're doing god's work, ladies.
posted by dong_resin at 7:59 AM on July 21, 2001


i was talking to my mom the other day about how i saw a ron jeremy movie.

she was all appalled, but it was practically the funniest damn thing i'd ever seen. that night.

he sucked his own... well, you know.

those poor women on the receiving end.

(and for those of you who may just skim, NO i did not watch a ron jeremy movie with my mom. i was just talking about how he came to town a few weeks ago and grabbed my coworker's boob.)
posted by sugarfish at 10:39 PM on July 21, 2001


« Older Hundreds flush with excitement during test of...   |   Another flash movie Newer »


This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments



Post