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June 16, 2010 9:58 PM   Subscribe

The Basics:
  Metallica Likes Death.
  Megadeth Likes to Kill!
  Slayer Likes Satan and Hell...
  ...and AC/DC Likes Rock 'N' Roll!
posted by not_on_display (48 comments total) 23 users marked this as a favorite

 
Unsurprisingly, the quality of Slayer's albums is in direct proportion to the quantity of hell/Satan references...
posted by vorfeed at 10:02 PM on June 16, 2010


The most blatantly Satanic popular band today? Cake
1. 2. 3.
And yes, I'm a fan.
posted by Balisong at 10:13 PM on June 16, 2010 [1 favorite]


4.
posted by Balisong at 10:14 PM on June 16, 2010


The funny thing is that those remixes all work as good songs that I'd listen to if they were on my iPod.
posted by ignignokt at 10:18 PM on June 16, 2010


Also, someone should do "Morbid Angel likes Sumerian gibberish."
posted by ignignokt at 10:24 PM on June 16, 2010


Unsurprisingly, the quality of Slayer's albums is in direct proportion to the quantity of hell/Satan references...

It never got better than South Of Heaven.
posted by philip-random at 10:35 PM on June 16, 2010 [1 favorite]


"James Brown Loves His Momma"
posted by Fiasco da Gama at 10:37 PM on June 16, 2010


also interesting: metalica, megadeath, and slayer like 1 key, ac/dc likes 3 or 4.
posted by mexican at 10:40 PM on June 16, 2010


When this was at the top of my google reader list, I had 666 unread stories. No bullshit.
posted by DZack at 10:44 PM on June 16, 2010 [4 favorites]


Cryptopsy Likes Anthropomancy!

Cannibal Corpse
Likes Stabbing!

99% Of Pop Acts Like Love!

(Although based on that last video, it appears that pop acts actually "hip hop" and "down" more than love these days. Oh crazy century!)
posted by Chichibio at 12:49 AM on June 17, 2010


What does Lady Gaga like?
posted by pracowity at 1:30 AM on June 17, 2010


And the Dandy Warhols like you. Yeah they like you. Yeah they like you, they like you, they like you, they like you, they like you.

And I hear they feel wahoo, wooo/
posted by Effigy2000 at 1:50 AM on June 17, 2010 [1 favorite]


What does Lady Gaga like?

Getting wet, being fed after midnight.
posted by Space Coyote at 1:54 AM on June 17, 2010 [3 favorites]


Led Zeppelin likes air raid sirens.

No wait, that's just Robert Plant.
posted by bwg at 1:57 AM on June 17, 2010


"James Brown Loves His Momma"

B.B.King likes his momma but she probably jivin' him too.
posted by hal9k at 2:40 AM on June 17, 2010 [2 favorites]


That's the best Metallica song I've ever heard.
posted by Devils Rancher at 4:44 AM on June 17, 2010 [2 favorites]


"Deathly Death greets Death!"

Good name for a song. /Nathan Expolsion
posted by piratebowling at 5:32 AM on June 17, 2010 [1 favorite]


The most blatantly Satanic popular band today? Cake

When I saw Cake in maybe 1999 or 2000, McRae led the crowd in a pretty intense chant during "Satan Is My Motor." They always put on a great show.
posted by uncleozzy at 5:42 AM on June 17, 2010


Excellent.

The first time I ever saw Metallica (Monsters of Rock Tour, Oxford Plains Speedway, Oxford Maine 6/25/88!) I was 18 and didn't really know much about them beyond "Bass solo, Take 1" and Whiplash. During what I would eventually find out was Creeping Death, the whole audience started chanting "Die! Die! Die!" while James Hetfeld told them all to "make sure the person next to you is singing along" and if they weren't to "grab them by the neck to help them along."

I've never been more terrified before or since.
posted by bondcliff at 5:47 AM on June 17, 2010 [3 favorites]


When Swedish black metal band Watain toured the US last year they somehow managed to bring over a container full of goats heads that they impaled on stakes at the front of the stage each night. The maybe unforeseen, maybe intentional, issue travelling in a bus with no refrigeration presented was that by midway through the tour the heads were so rotted and fetid that clubs were losing on bar profits because so many people were leaving early since they couldn't deal with the overwhelming, vomit inducing death stench that filled the entire space. Club owners would move through the crowd with containers of Vicks vapo-rub for fans to smear under their noses so they could make it through the show. The band itself also drenched itself in blood before each show and didn't seem to shower much in between so they themselves reaked of such nauseating death and rot that they were either so accustomed or mentally ill not to notice that a lot of would be interviewers balked. That was fine, because people who attempted to interview the band were met with hostile silence, anyway.

So Watain came back to America to play the Maryland Death Fest a couple weeks ago and guess what came with them? That's right, THE SAME FUCKING GOATS HEADS FROM LAST YEAR (full set, all obviously not safe for lunch), which by this point are basically mummified.

Top that.
posted by The Straightener at 5:48 AM on June 17, 2010 [20 favorites]


Can't.
posted by functionequalsform at 5:57 AM on June 17, 2010


What does Lady Gaga like?

I once saw a Lego version of Lady Gaga singing with John Stewart and Stephen Colbert.
posted by KevinSkomsvold at 5:59 AM on June 17, 2010


Top that.

Wow. Just wow. That totally trumps my story about the time Oderus Urungus ejaculated on my face.
posted by Cat Pie Hurts at 6:12 AM on June 17, 2010 [1 favorite]


Gruff.
posted by pracowity at 6:16 AM on June 17, 2010


Top that.

One time I saw Edie Brickell tell a story about McDonalds french fries.
posted by bondcliff at 6:17 AM on June 17, 2010 [1 favorite]


She's not aware of too many things but she knows her Mickey Dee's fries?

"Chuck them in the deep fat fryer
And wait till it goes beep"
posted by pracowity at 6:28 AM on June 17, 2010


I once sat next to R.L. Burnside backstage after a show and he told me dirty jokes. That's much cooler than rotting goat heads.
posted by zzazazz at 7:20 AM on June 17, 2010


That's right, THE SAME FUCKING GOATS HEADS FROM LAST YEAR

Brutal.
posted by MikeMc at 7:26 AM on June 17, 2010


Oh yeah, then there was the message posted to Watain's Myspace prior to Deathfest regarding the fact that one member couldn't make it overseas because of his criminal history:

Regarding Maryland Deathfest
To our US Legions!

We are leaving for the US in 12 hours from now, armed to the teeth and ready to murder.
The Watain perfomance at Maryland Deathfest shall be a triumphant holocaust of all that is holy, and a massive celebration of the gods of Lawless Darkness!
Be prepared...

Due to legal bullshit, our brother Set will not be able to enter the States for Maryland Deathfest. E will handle the second guitar and vocals. The rest of the line up will be as always;

H - Battery
P - Guitar
A - Bass

Try as you might, but nothing can stop the Devil's sworn to do their work! Not even the tame resistance of the law.

FUCK THE WORLD!
HAIL SATAN!


Their sincerity is sort of infectious, isn't it? It makes me defy the tame resistance of the law.


Even if you don't dig black metal you might like their new "single" (I will be murdered shortly for referring to it as such) Reaping Death, totally necro but catchy as fuck, a real head bobber.
posted by The Straightener at 7:31 AM on June 17, 2010 [1 favorite]


I've recently gotten back into really early AC/DC and I've been amazed that so many of these 30 - 40 year old songs hold up as well as they do, considering that most other songs from bands of that time sound really dated.

Then I got to thinking about what nearly every AC/DC song is about: Rock and Roll, drinking, getting in trouble with the law, Hell as a metaphor for awesome, and sex through an electricity-related play on words.

That's pretty much it.

And it's fucking genius; I have to applaud the hell out of them for it. These are universals that can speak to anyone from any time.
posted by quin at 8:53 AM on June 17, 2010 [2 favorites]


Even if you don't dig black metal you might like their new "single"

I think I actually understood a few words of that, which makes them practically The Osmonds. And those goat heads are kinda cute.

Oh and I got called fat by one of the roadies of the Macc Lads when I was cueing to get into one of their gig and I told him to fuck off... top that!
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 9:04 AM on June 17, 2010


top that!

Easy. All it takes really is a microphone, some noise and some dark stuff deep inside that needs to get out.
posted by philip-random at 9:33 AM on June 17, 2010


Somebody should make a web app that looks up all the song lyrics it can for a given band, and analyzes the frequency of each word in a handy chart (discarding common words like articles and pronouns).
posted by The Winsome Parker Lewis at 9:58 AM on June 17, 2010


the watain show i went to last year was kinda weak. visually they looked cool, lots of shit on stage, and the dudes looked like they crawled out of a grave or something. but the sound sucked! for glossy, overdone scandinavian bm i'll take gorgoroth. or funeral mist. (actually i'll take immortal but they don't fall into the same 'hail satan' camp as watain, funeral mist or gorgoroth, but holy shit, immortal rules)
posted by rainperimeter at 11:24 AM on June 17, 2010


I've never been more terrified before or since.
posted by bondcliff


Yep. Metallica's always been a really scary band.
posted by justgary at 11:38 AM on June 17, 2010 [3 favorites]


And Dave Mustane likes to sleep in rehab.
posted by stormpooper at 12:02 PM on June 17, 2010


I love the shit out of Funeral Mist's Maranatha. Sounds like the cellar demon from Evil Dead 2 is singing, it's completely unhinged.
posted by The Straightener at 12:09 PM on June 17, 2010


Slayer, Metallica, and Megadeth (and Anthrax, they don't want you to forget them!) recently got together for a heartwarming yearbook photo.
posted by ignignokt at 2:52 PM on June 17, 2010 [1 favorite]


And Dave Mustane likes to sleep in rehab.

He's outta rehab. My friend was on tour with him did lines with him a couple years ago. True gossip.
posted by Liquidwolf at 3:54 PM on June 17, 2010


Metallica Likes Death.
Megadeth Likes to Kill!
Slayer Likes Satan and Hell...
...and AC/DC Likes Rock 'N' Roll!
Danzig likes cake.
posted by swell at 7:51 PM on June 17, 2010


NWA really really likes swearing
posted by Dr.Enormous at 9:08 PM on June 17, 2010


"NWA really really likes swearing "
posted by Dr.Enormous

I hope you meant to link to this. What was that NOISE you linked to.
posted by not_on_display at 9:39 PM on June 17, 2010 [2 favorites]


Wow. What on earth made that happen?
posted by Dr.Enormous at 6:41 PM on June 19, 2010


This made that happen: The Happy Version of Raining Blood
posted by not_on_display at 10:00 AM on June 22, 2010 [1 favorite]


The jazz Iron Man. (With major key section!)
posted by ignignokt at 11:11 AM on June 22, 2010


Smooth Jazz Crazy Train!

Andy Rehfeldt is great at this game, turning artists against themselves.

See his version of Cannibal Corpse's Hammer Smashed Face, for instance. It is WONDROUS. The video links up the music perfectly.
posted by not_on_display at 10:05 PM on June 22, 2010 [1 favorite]


Those were freakin' amazing. Both morbidly (in the non-death-related sense, oddly) compelling!

Far less musical and admirable, but still bizarrely compelling: The Fresh Prince of Death Metal.
posted by ignignokt at 9:21 PM on June 25, 2010


Louis Armstrong's "What a Wonderful World" - death metal style.
posted by not_on_display at 3:51 PM on June 26, 2010


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