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Seven dead stoats, four squirrels and one hare.
July 22, 2010 12:37 PM   Subscribe

55% ABV beer to be sold in dead animals
posted by OverlappingElvis (98 comments total) 9 users marked this as a favorite

 
I really was hoping this was going to be an article in The Onion. Super creepy.
posted by banannafish at 12:38 PM on July 22, 2010


Marketing gets ever more sensitive.
posted by Cranberry at 12:40 PM on July 22, 2010


Double Imperial Squirrel?
posted by Thorzdad at 12:40 PM on July 22, 2010


Holy shit, as I went to click on the link, I thought, "Ten bucks says it's those stunty fucking jackasses at Brewdog." Yep.
posted by Greg Nog at 12:42 PM on July 22, 2010 [7 favorites]


''In true BrewDog fashion, we've torn up convention, blurred distinctions and pushed brewing and beer packaging to its absolute limits."

Roadkill is some sort of "limit"? They're sort of begging to be one-upped, here. I'm looking at you, Orkney Skullsplitter Ale.
posted by gurple at 12:43 PM on July 22, 2010


The race for the highest ABV beer is like the race for the most blades on a razor.
posted by yeti at 12:44 PM on July 22, 2010 [9 favorites]


Definitely best of the web!
posted by DaddyNewt at 12:44 PM on July 22, 2010


Twelve bottles

Some people scoff.

I see a marketing guy that just spent $100 bucks at a taxidermy shop and got his story thrown around to a worldwide audience that, before today, had never even heard of The End Of History ale, but now want to see what all the fuss is.

We should all be so lucky.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 12:44 PM on July 22, 2010 [2 favorites]


WHAT WE DID WAS, WE POURED SOME EVERCLEAR INTO A SHOE AND THE NAME OF THIS BEER IS "IZ YEZ MAN ENOUGH TO DRINK OUT OF A FOOKIN SHOE????!?"

ITS MEANT TO BE SIPPED LIKE FINE WINE
posted by Greg Nog at 12:45 PM on July 22, 2010 [114 favorites]


I don't like it. No, I don't.
posted by emhutchinson at 12:45 PM on July 22, 2010


Shit, where I'm from we call these hillbilly coozies.
posted by Think_Long at 12:45 PM on July 22, 2010 [13 favorites]


What I need is a stiff drink.
posted by swift at 12:45 PM on July 22, 2010 [12 favorites]


Beer belongs in live humans, not dead animals.
posted by Faint of Butt at 12:46 PM on July 22, 2010 [5 favorites]


So, like, it doesn't breach any kind of health codes to package booze in a squirrel's corpse?
posted by Sys Rq at 12:48 PM on July 22, 2010 [2 favorites]


Nah, approaching the limit would be if some kind of amazing beer nectar was contained within a sterile cavity in the torso of an engineered animal, something cute, with the face of your girlfriend from fifth grade, maybe with some kind of biobattery and so it could squeak out your childhood nickname from the speaker embedded its throat. The package comes with year's worth of feed and a hacksaw. Tattooed on its lightly furred chest is the question "How much do you want this?" Bespoke beverages for the discerning emotional masochist.
posted by adipocere at 12:51 PM on July 22, 2010 [23 favorites]


55% ABV beer served in dead animals? Eh, it's OK, but it's no Dagestani wedding.
posted by mosk at 12:51 PM on July 22, 2010 [2 favorites]


IZ YEZ MAN ENOUGH TO DRINK OUT OF A FOOKIN SHOE

I would by such a beer. Also, I have drunk beer out of a rugby cleat (gasp) and also out of a cycling shoe who I don't even know who it belonged to.
posted by Mister_A at 12:52 PM on July 22, 2010


IZ I MAN ENOUGH TO FOOKIN SPELL "BUY" C'RECKLY? NAY I IZNA!
posted by Mister_A at 12:53 PM on July 22, 2010 [3 favorites]


The brewer recommend the beer should be served in a shot or whisky glass ''to be enjoyed like a fine whisky''.

Or you could always, you know, have a fine whisky instead.
posted by rocket88 at 12:54 PM on July 22, 2010 [6 favorites]


I have a portable cocktail kit where the liquor is carried in leather bottles. The only difference between that and this, as far as I can tell, is that this has a face.
posted by Astro Zombie at 12:54 PM on July 22, 2010 [6 favorites]


Coming soon: We Coughed On The Glass Ale, Suppurating Lager and Stillborn IPA (We're breaking the limits of breaking limits!)
posted by boo_radley at 12:55 PM on July 22, 2010 [1 favorite]


"What I need is a stiff drink."

I see what you did there.
posted by mr_crash_davis mark II: Jazz Odyssey at 12:55 PM on July 22, 2010


Sickening. I mean the beer and the presentation, here. I guess if you have to be a shitty brewer you should also try to be a shitty person in general.
posted by rusty at 12:55 PM on July 22, 2010


Also fur.
posted by Mister_A at 12:56 PM on July 22, 2010


I eagerly await the ale infused porter infused with an IPA served in a duck stuffed in a chicken stuffed in a turkey.

An Ipaleturducken.
posted by munchingzombie at 12:56 PM on July 22, 2010 [11 favorites]


Somewhere along the way I learned that the body breaks down methyl alcohol... into formaldehyde -- a chemical one might use in taxidermy.
Is there something distinctive we should know about this brew?
posted by Durn Bronzefist at 12:56 PM on July 22, 2010


Oh look, they also make something called "Mummy's Nuts Porter," which can be construed a couple of ways.
posted by Mister_A at 1:00 PM on July 22, 2010


Wouild it have been less offensive it the beer had been sold in live animals?
posted by yhbc at 1:01 PM on July 22, 2010


Out of the eater came something to eat.
Out of the strong came something sweet.
posted by komara at 1:03 PM on July 22, 2010


What I'm saying here is that Samson could have fucked with the Philistines for a long time by getting his hands on a squirrel filled with beer.
posted by komara at 1:04 PM on July 22, 2010 [4 favorites]


Beer merkin.
posted by Keith Talent at 1:09 PM on July 22, 2010 [4 favorites]


Oh, and, for the record...fuck this high-ABV arms race in beer.
posted by Thorzdad at 1:13 PM on July 22, 2010 [2 favorites]


On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: a partridge in a pear tree beer bottle in a partridge.
posted by daniel_charms at 1:13 PM on July 22, 2010


It's like a product from Idiocracy. Sitting right next to it is Fleshlight ale, the beer you can fuck. 80% ABV.
posted by Humanzee at 1:15 PM on July 22, 2010 [14 favorites]


They couldn't have just made a nice doppelbock and served it in a goat's head?
posted by anthom at 1:16 PM on July 22, 2010 [1 favorite]


I'm against this as an animal lover, but I like the batshit insanity of it. So I'm torn.

Much like the squirrels.
posted by brundlefly at 1:17 PM on July 22, 2010 [4 favorites]


Why is this high alcohol beer thing so big? I find the taste of beer repellent, (think I might have a hops allergy or something) but wouldn't having giant amounts of alcohol destroy any complexity the beer might have, and make the whole thing taste like beer-flavored medicine?
posted by StrikeTheViol at 1:19 PM on July 22, 2010


Orkney Skullsplitter Ale

Strangely enough, the fellow on that package, looks a lot like me. Give him glasses and a few extra pounds and I'd be swarmed by Skullsplitter groupies...


55% ABV beer is just fucking stupid, the dead animal is added for shock value which makes it all one big package of tediousness, wrapped around a steaming pile of assholishness.
posted by edgeways at 1:19 PM on July 22, 2010


laaame. I wish they'd call beverages made by this freeze-reduce-freeze-and so forth process something other than "beer." Because as a naive outsider, it seems like instead of making beer, they've just invented a new and ridiculous method of distilling hard liquor. Has anyone here actually drank any of this brewdog stuff? Like, is there a pleasant beerishness to it that would make you want to drink it instead of whiskey or whatever?
posted by You Can't Tip a Buick at 1:23 PM on July 22, 2010 [1 favorite]


I don't want a "beer to end all beers". That would be, ipso facto, the end of beer. I would prefer an outlook of continued beer.
posted by Wolfdog at 1:24 PM on July 22, 2010 [15 favorites]


Screw brew dog. I'm going to plug great divide brewing. They make great beer. It comes in bottles. You should drink some.
posted by craven_morhead at 1:24 PM on July 22, 2010


FIIIIIIVE GOLDEN TUQUES!
posted by WerewolvesRancheros at 1:27 PM on July 22, 2010 [3 favorites]


Why is this high alcohol beer thing so big?

Why did that dude on craigslist show me a picture of his large turgid cock when all I wanted was to buy his old air conditioner?

I'm going to plug great divide brewing.

Yeah, they're great! I really like their Oak-Aged Yeti on a chilly day.

You know who I think is just tops, though? Allagash. I wish they'd continued making their 2007 Fluxus after 2007; that's one of the most lovely beers I've ever had.
posted by Greg Nog at 1:27 PM on July 22, 2010 [1 favorite]


No, freeze distilling makes beer horrible. If you drink Aventinus Weizenbock and Weizen-eisbock back to back, the eisbock feels like drinking rubbing alcohol and the weizenbock is like drinking God's tears.
posted by mkb at 1:31 PM on July 22, 2010


A friend's parents have ceramic bourbon decanters all over the house, in the shapes of athletes, statesmen, the Statue of Liberty. This is sort of like that, only fuzzier.

Except that you might actually want to drink the bourbon.
posted by uncleozzy at 1:34 PM on July 22, 2010


Nice.
posted by Artw at 1:44 PM on July 22, 2010


On the one hand I avoid consuming products with dead animals involved, on the other I fucking hate squirrels, bastards killed my bird feeder. I would try it, someone else buy it!

Brewdog needs a new gimmick though, this kind of beer doesn't taste good. It has done a fantastic job getting them publicity but they can't keep one upping themselves with stunts forever. Just make good beer.
posted by furiousxgeorge at 1:45 PM on July 22, 2010


Anyone for tea?
posted by George_Spiggott at 1:48 PM on July 22, 2010


If they could just make good beer they wouldn't need all the stunts, george.
posted by Mister_A at 1:50 PM on July 22, 2010


If it tastes anything like the Sam Adams Triple Bock, then you can just mix some Everclear with prune juice* and call it a day.

*I know someone who did this. He called it "the yo-yo" since it would eventually come out at both ends.
posted by JoanArkham at 1:52 PM on July 22, 2010 [1 favorite]


I'm trying to imagine drinking from the bottle and having that dead little face coming up to meet me each time.

*shudder*

I'd have to be drunk before starting to drink from these, I think.
posted by quin at 1:57 PM on July 22, 2010 [1 favorite]


I prefer my beer from the skulls of my defeated enemies.
posted by Cookiebastard at 1:59 PM on July 22, 2010 [1 favorite]


BrewDog drew criticism from industry watchdog the Portman Group last year when it unveiled a 32% beer, Tactical Nuclear Penguin.

I don't even drink and now I want a bottle of "Tactical Nuclear Penguin" just to keep on the shelf!
posted by Chocolate Pickle at 2:06 PM on July 22, 2010


You need enemies without eyes then.
posted by mkb at 2:08 PM on July 22, 2010 [1 favorite]


The squirrel acts as a perfect light barrier. It laughs at your paper wrappings and brown glass.
posted by zephyr_words at 2:09 PM on July 22, 2010


... it seems like instead of making beer, they've just invented a new and ridiculous method of distilling hard liquor.

Exactly.
posted by Phanx at 2:11 PM on July 22, 2010 [1 favorite]


Outfits featured on some of the animals include a kilt and a top hat.

In its wee sporran we have tucked a dram of trillion scoville hot sauce.
posted by fleetmouse at 2:24 PM on July 22, 2010 [2 favorites]


Harpoon Breweries - whose beer I rather like as a rule - makes a beer called Leviathan, which I believe is 14%. It's... drinkable. It's not quite tasty, it's kind of harsh but it's at least vaguely palatable. I can't really imagine anything much stronger than that tasting like anything other than death, and I'm a whiskey drinker.
posted by Aversion Therapy at 2:43 PM on July 22, 2010


I wish they'd call beverages made by this freeze-reduce-freeze-and so forth process something other than "beer."

They are properly called "jack", as in applejack brandy, from the term jacking for the freeze distillation process you describe. As someone who enjoys both beer and wine, I wonder what the point is. Beer snobs now want fine beer to compete with fine wine, but you would never see a winery attempting to pull this shit with wine and pass it off as a high end product. In fact, when wineries produce artificially high-proof wines, they are generally aimed at the bottom of the market. I realize there are exceptions, but they don't feel it is necessary to put calvados in dead squirrels as a marketing gimmick.
posted by TedW at 2:48 PM on July 22, 2010 [3 favorites]


On the other hand, some people will put cognac in a gold, platinum, and diamond-encrusted bottle as a marketing gimmick.
posted by TedW at 2:52 PM on July 22, 2010


I have a bottle of Utopias, was the only present I got for Christmas this year, and I have to say it is a damn amazing and complicated beer. I may have 2/3rds of it left, since it is meant to be consumed more like a port or a brandy, and not by the pint. It's good stuff, meant to be enjoyed over time with a group of people.

More, I am impressed by the technical ability of the folks who made it, since it is so labor intensive to create something so high proof and still drinkable. But I would not want to try to get drunk off of this stuff, since it is screaming for a horrible hangover.
posted by mrzarquon at 2:55 PM on July 22, 2010


One of the biggest regrets in my booze aquiring life is not buying the vodka that came in the AK-47 shaped bottle at the St. Petersburg airport.
posted by Artw at 2:57 PM on July 22, 2010


Re Utopias:

They are also, IIRC, not made using any freeze distillation. Even if you don't like the taste you have to respect the technical brewing ability there to get a beer that boozy using just yeast.
posted by furiousxgeorge at 3:00 PM on July 22, 2010


Beer snobs now want fine beer to compete with fine wine

This has nothing to do with beer snobs, thank you very much. Beer snobs aren't looking for the highest ABV, they're looking for good beer. Michael Jackson wouldn't have given this a minute of his attention.
posted by me & my monkey at 3:02 PM on July 22, 2010 [2 favorites]


Heh. I have a friend that interviewed at BrewDog earlier this year to help them revamp their bottling line. He didn't get it, BrewDog having shut down the search because they said they were going in a "different direction."
posted by robocop is bleeding at 3:03 PM on July 22, 2010


Where do they go after this? How do you top dead animal beer? Maybe limbs? Gangrenous leg beer anyone?
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 3:06 PM on July 22, 2010 [1 favorite]


Meh. Call me when they have a foetus from the same skinned animal floating inside the bottle (like those "snake tequilas")
posted by qvantamon at 3:06 PM on July 22, 2010


How do you top dead animal beer?

Good news, everyone! Now we drink beer straight from the digestive vacuoles of a live Horrible Gelatinous Blob!
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 3:22 PM on July 22, 2010 [1 favorite]


Where do they go after this? How do you top dead animal beer? Maybe limbs? Gangrenous leg beer anyone?

Bartender's Foot Brew.
posted by zarq at 3:22 PM on July 22, 2010


Harpoon Breweries - whose beer I rather like as a rule - makes a beer called Leviathan

It's actually a whole series! There is an Imperial IPA, a Baltic Porter, a Quad, etc.
posted by mkb at 3:23 PM on July 22, 2010


How do you top dead animal beer?

I have this horrible feeling it will involve repeated viewings of Trainspotting.
posted by zarq at 3:24 PM on July 22, 2010


Dear God,
Change of plan, smite these persons, and the horses they rode in on.
Thx,
Marty
posted by nj_subgenius at 3:24 PM on July 22, 2010


I learned something today. I learned that adipocere is a damned genius.
posted by ActualStackhouse at 3:28 PM on July 22, 2010


This is like Blair's 16 Million Reserve, a "hot sauce" that's actually pure capsaicin crystals. You're not supposed to consume it, it's for bragging rights.
posted by Halloween Jack at 3:32 PM on July 22, 2010


Great for any beer. I could have a wild hare up my Bass.
posted by hal9k at 4:21 PM on July 22, 2010


By the way - You know those PET bottles your soda comes in? YOUR SODA IS SOLD IN DEAD DINOSAURS!
posted by qvantamon at 4:41 PM on July 22, 2010 [5 favorites]


How do you top dead animal beer?
"This is brewed from barley that was partially digested and excreted by the very same civet you're now drinking it out of."
posted by Wolfdog at 5:08 PM on July 22, 2010 [5 favorites]


''In true BrewDog fashion, we've torn up convention, blurred distinctions and pushed brewing and beer packaging to its absolute limits."

It's throat-punching time.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 5:18 PM on July 22, 2010 [1 favorite]


I'm holding out for the beer that's sold in dead babies.
posted by MaryDellamorte at 5:20 PM on July 22, 2010


Beer snobs now want fine beer to compete with fine wine

This has nothing to do with beer snobs, thank you very much. Beer snobs aren't looking for the highest ABV, they're looking for good beer.


That is exactly the point I wanted to make; people who enjoy wine (I will stop my flippant use of the word "snobs" because I would rather make my point than offend people) look at alcohol content as only one characteristic of a wine and would (rightfully) be skeptical of a wine whose main selling point was its high alcohol content (or that it was a poorly made brandy). But given the price of these high alcohol beers and the fact that their alcohol content is the main thing that sets them apart from other beers, it seems that the brewers think people who want a good beer care more about alcohol content than taste. In other words it is pretty insulting to serious beer drinkers the way they market this stuff (I won't call it swill because I have never tasted it and will give them the benefit of the doubt that it may have some redeeming quality).
posted by TedW at 5:20 PM on July 22, 2010


this is not raising crunchland's bar! also, gross!
posted by cjorgensen at 5:33 PM on July 22, 2010


I want my next keg in a dead grizzly killed by Sarah Palin with a pen knife.
posted by dortmunder at 5:42 PM on July 22, 2010


I only drink alcohol out of endangered animals thankyou. You've never had beer unless you've had beer served out of a rhino skull.
posted by tuck_nroll at 5:55 PM on July 22, 2010


From the article: "[BrewDog] has also faced claims that its 18.2 per cent Tokyo beer promoted excess."

What does that even mean, "promoted excess"?
posted by limeonaire at 6:23 PM on July 22, 2010


That's because if you sell a high ABV drink for a hundred dollars a bottle, people will obviously just find out a way to shotgun it to drink as many as possible in the shortest amount of time.

As opposed to, you know, cheap light lagers with ABV 4%, where you can't taste the alcohol (or anything, for that matters). Nobody ever binge drinks those. It just doesn't happen.
posted by qvantamon at 6:59 PM on July 22, 2010 [1 favorite]


You Can't Tip a Buick: Has anyone here actually drank any of this brewdog stuff? Like, is there a pleasant beerishness to it that would make you want to drink it instead of whiskey or whatever?

Not this one, obviously, but I had their last 'world's strongest beer.' It was my favorite beer or anything, but it really didn't taste anything like whiskey. It didn't taste like a normal beer, either, obviously, but you the flavors were in the right vein. To be honest, I've had much worse beers at 12-14% than the Sinking The Bismark was at 41%.

Wolfdog: "This is brewed from barley that was partially digested and excreted by the very same civet you're now drinking it out of."

Mikkeller did a Beer Geek Breakfast Weasel that was made using the civet coffee beans, instead of normal coffee beans.
posted by paisley henosis at 7:15 PM on July 22, 2010


I want my next keg in a dead Sarah Palin. Grizzly optional.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 7:36 PM on July 22, 2010 [2 favorites]


The topper is that they dress the dead animals up in kilts and whatnot. You're just begging for some type of mummy/pet cemetery curse here.
posted by nomad at 8:54 PM on July 22, 2010


You Can't Tip a Buick: Has anyone here actually drank any of this brewdog stuff? Like, is there a pleasant beerishness to it that would make you want to drink it instead of whiskey or whatever?

I've had a bottle of Tactical Nuclear Penguin, shared with two friends as part of a beer tasting night. It's ... different. Closer to a whisky than a beer, but with a pretty strong malt taste (if you like porters, you'd like it).

Brew Dog hasn't made a beer yet that I haven't liked. Yes, they're incredibly pretentious, but they get away with it because they make damn fine beer.
posted by ChrisR at 10:55 PM on July 22, 2010


i have a challenge for brew dog - make an honest, good beer for under 20 bucks a six pack - there's a shitload of breweries who can do that in the u s and the u k

surely they can manage that
posted by pyramid termite at 10:59 PM on July 22, 2010


i have a challenge for brew dog - make an honest, good beer for under 20 bucks a six pack

They actually do. Several, in fact. Their Punk IPA, Trashy Blonde and '77 Lager are my go-to beers, these day, and all come in at about £15 for a case of a dozen. Paradox is sadly a little more pricey, but is freaking exquisite.

Their whole marketing strategy definitely polarises people's opinion. Personally, I can't be arsed with the ABV arms-race thing, either. But I'm not going to let that put me off some cracking good (honest) beers.
posted by kxr at 11:31 PM on July 22, 2010


"taxidermy helps open people's eyes to the fact that beer doesn't have to be made by a multi-national organization."

I don't know whether to laugh at this, laugh with this, or just be mildly annoyed by it.
Or should I just support it?
What say you, Internet?!
posted by chickencoop at 8:30 AM on July 23, 2010


well, kxr, they're pretty expensive across the pond - even compared to other u k brands - 16 bucks for a 22 oz bottle just isn't going to be worth it for me and that's all i've seen where i am

perhaps it's the local distributors
posted by pyramid termite at 9:55 AM on July 23, 2010


Think I drank a bottle of Boone's that was like this.
posted by roganmedia at 2:29 PM on July 23, 2010


pyramid termite: well, kxr, they're pretty expensive across the pond - even compared to other u k brands - 16 bucks for a 22 oz bottle just isn't going to be worth it for me and that's all i've seen where i am

I don't know about Heiniken or Stella or whatever, but for small market beers, when they are imported, an easy rule of thumb is that they cost no more than half the imported US price to buy locally, where ever that may be. I've seen 33cl bottles imported from Belgium that cost ~8USD per bottle in the States, and ~1Euro from the brewery. Lots of that is taxes, lots of it is freight, and lots of it is because being a beer importer is expensive work and your kids need to eat too.
posted by paisley henosis at 9:39 PM on July 23, 2010


just as a comparison, i picked up two 16.9 oz cans of fuller's london pride today at 1.79 each - and samuel smith's ales tend to be priced at 4 to 5 bucks for a 19.7 oz bottle - a small bottle of chimay blue goes for just under 5 bucks - and various other ales from britain seem to go for about 4 to 6 bucks for a 16.9 oz or 16.9 oz bottle

the price for a 4 pack can tends to be around 7 - 9 bucks - for a six pack of 11.5 bottles around 11 - 12 bucks, although samuel smith's goes for 12 for 4 pack of those

so brew dog's ales seem rather overpriced to me
posted by pyramid termite at 10:46 PM on July 24, 2010


Also they're going to be contract brewing BrewDog in the old Anchor brewery in California before too long, so expect the prices to drop (at least a little) once it isn't an import.
posted by paisley henosis at 6:42 PM on July 25, 2010


PS- I agree with you 100%, by the way. I've only had BrewDog beers at beer fests, where they're the same price as other beers, because I cannot justify the price of a bottle to myself.
posted by paisley henosis at 7:09 PM on July 25, 2010


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