seriously, don't try this at home
August 26, 2010 3:00 PM   Subscribe

Hay Baling Fun (NSFW)

You will need to sign into YouTube because there is a (distant) bare bottom
posted by KokuRyu (65 comments total) 8 users marked this as a favorite

 
SLYTfilter?
posted by ZaneJ. at 3:03 PM on August 26, 2010


That's gotta ITCH!
posted by oneswellfoop at 3:04 PM on August 26, 2010


what
posted by found missing at 3:05 PM on August 26, 2010


Naked makes everything more awesome, doesn't it?
posted by Cat Pie Hurts at 3:05 PM on August 26, 2010


Hicks are awesome.
posted by nosila at 3:06 PM on August 26, 2010


Fake. But funny.
posted by chavenet at 3:06 PM on August 26, 2010


Did he died?
posted by Threeway Handshake at 3:08 PM on August 26, 2010 [3 favorites]


I was more impressed that he was ghost riding such a large whip.
posted by mathowie at 3:09 PM on August 26, 2010 [13 favorites]


Rule 34 never ceases to amaze me.
posted by afx237vi at 3:10 PM on August 26, 2010


PS, "baling" not "bailing".
posted by afx237vi at 3:11 PM on August 26, 2010


PS, "baling" not "bailing".

Yeah, I noticed that after I pressed "post"
posted by KokuRyu at 3:13 PM on August 26, 2010


I fixed that typo for ya.
posted by mathowie at 3:15 PM on August 26, 2010 [1 favorite]


This cannot possibly be real. Every hay baler I ever say (which, admittedly, is very few as I'm a city boy) uses a lot of long pointy moving bits t get the hay around and there's no way you could possibly get in it without getting killed.

But maybe there's been huge advances in hay-suit technology I'm unaware of.
posted by GuyZero at 3:16 PM on August 26, 2010 [1 favorite]


Baling hay as a kid I vividly remember the first time a bale came out with the business half a rattlesnake flailing wildly, mad as hell. Probably because the part that was stuck in the bale was decapitated, rattle and all. It died shortly thereafter, so we put it in this other kid's lunchbox. Good times.

But yeah, the video is so fake. But since it is fake, what could this possible be a viral for? (don't answer that)
posted by infinitefloatingbrains at 3:19 PM on August 26, 2010 [7 favorites]


He looks like Andy from Little Britain, who is known for taking off his clothes and going for a romp (when Lou isn't watching, of course).
posted by msbutah at 3:22 PM on August 26, 2010


I used to have to work 4 huge fields twice a year. Hay baling is one of the most miserable things I've ever done in my life.

I admit I'm not up on the latest in square bale technology, but I don't know how someone could have done that with the balers we used to work with and not ended up dead or at least in the hospital.
posted by vibrotronica at 3:23 PM on August 26, 2010


Hay. I see what you did there.
posted by punkfloyd at 3:25 PM on August 26, 2010 [4 favorites]


That can't be real, stabby pointy things plus a chopper.

On the other hand, some years ago while picking out a xmas tree, I saw some kids horsing around the netting machine and eventually one of them got shoved through. He squealed like crazy when he discovered he couldn't break free.

Hah, of course Youtube has videos of people doing just that.
posted by jamaro at 3:26 PM on August 26, 2010 [4 favorites]


Oh, all right: LOL!
posted by Gator at 3:33 PM on August 26, 2010 [1 favorite]


He looks like Sponge Bob No Pants.
posted by hanoixan at 3:45 PM on August 26, 2010 [4 favorites]


When my dad was a kid an in the hospital he shared a room with a boy that fell into a hay-baler. He got stabbed many times times from sharp things. Do they work different now, or maybe this is fake?
posted by floam at 3:50 PM on August 26, 2010


Hay bales are essentially compressed hay wrapped in twine. The compression comes from a panel smashing hay over and over, creating small layers of flattened hay that are pancaked horizontally. If the video were real, the guy would come out decapitated, mangled, pulverized, and wrapped in twine. Kind of like what happened in Metatalk yesterday.
posted by infinitefloatingbrains at 3:57 PM on August 26, 2010 [6 favorites]


Also, from my again limited experience driving a tractor, if you let go of the steering wheel it's unlikely to just keep driving in a straight line when you're in a hay field.

So is this fake? YOU BE THE JUDGE.
posted by GuyZero at 3:57 PM on August 26, 2010


In college I had a friend who's family owned a Christmas tree farm. We went up there one year for camping and got drunk, which turned into naked time while driving 4-wheelers in the dark (it turns out Christmas trees are pretty flexible, and when you nail one at 30 mph, they bend a lot and will smack you in your fucking face). Anyway, we also put a dude through one of those tree bailers, the type that wrap the twine around the tree so you can take it home strapped to the roof of your car.

I don't know exactly how the hay bailers work, but I can guarantee you that it's non-lethal (at least usually) for those Christmas tree wrapper things.
posted by spikeleemajortomdickandharryconnickjrmints at 4:06 PM on August 26, 2010


Oh, God -- FAKE. Not only would a real hay baler have squished and stabbed someone going through it, the guy in the video came out in a perfectly assembled hay suit, with his arms and legs jutting out just right.

My guess: a hay baler with all the hay baling bits taken out, leaving a clean, non-death-dealing chute and maybe a confederate/butler inside the truck with a styrofoam get-up pasted with hay who helped Haybob get dressed.
posted by maudlin at 4:07 PM on August 26, 2010


On preview, what jamaro said.
posted by spikeleemajortomdickandharryconnickjrmints at 4:07 PM on August 26, 2010


or rather, on lack of preview
posted by spikeleemajortomdickandharryconnickjrmints at 4:07 PM on August 26, 2010


I second the hay baling is miserable work comment. Hot weather with jeans, a long sleeved shirt and gloves, for 12hrs a day, is some of the hardest physical labor I have ever had to endure. Not to mention getting hit by a bale that was just kicked off the baler sucks. You learn to dodge bales pretty quickly after getting knocked down or off the wagon. Also, stacking hay in a hay loft is pretty bad too. Luckily, there is normally about a month between cuttings, so you only have to do three or four times a year.
posted by jdoss at 4:09 PM on August 26, 2010 [1 favorite]


It's viral marketing for the new Farmville movie.
posted by l33tpolicywonk at 4:10 PM on August 26, 2010 [9 favorites]


Metafilter: decapitated, mangled, pulverized, and wrapped in twine.
posted by Devils Rancher at 4:12 PM on August 26, 2010 [1 favorite]


I ran an old hay baler for a week or so, a long time ago. I was terrified of it and I can't imagine any way a person could have gone through it and survived.
posted by Forktine at 4:13 PM on August 26, 2010


Alfalfa is the heavy hay. Count me as a person who considers herself lucky to not work on a farm at any other time than summers in college.
posted by jessamyn at 4:25 PM on August 26, 2010


Every time a kitten masturbates, God kills a Domo-kun.
posted by Anything at 4:31 PM on August 26, 2010 [4 favorites]


Well, it's funny, yes, but nobody from a rural area who grew up hearing about baler accidents would think it's too plausible.

Also: why nude? Jesus. Dry hay? These city people probably think hay is like grass or something. It's not. If that guy somehow survived the pass through the baler (pssht) then his privates are bleeding now from contact with the hay.
posted by Michael Roberts at 4:31 PM on August 26, 2010


Hicks are awesome.

Sure are.
posted by Hicksu at 4:36 PM on August 26, 2010 [4 favorites]


But yeah, the video is so fake. But since it is fake, what could this possible be a viral for? (don't answer that)

To RickRoll straw man arguments?
posted by hal9k at 4:52 PM on August 26, 2010 [10 favorites]


Adding to the chorus of fake and adding a little solo of "and why *naked*?". If the baler hurts clothing it isn't going to do anything nice to skin.
posted by DU at 4:52 PM on August 26, 2010


I would give cash money to have a laugh like that woman.
posted by digsrus at 4:55 PM on August 26, 2010


Yeah, too much baling on several cousins' farms as a kid. And they ALWAYS told the story of my dad jumping up and down on the "kicker" trying to get it to work. And it finally did with him riding a bale up in an impressive arc and down, some say several minutes later, into the trailing wagon. Through the years, each retelling gained him another foot or so of altitude.
posted by hal9k at 5:01 PM on August 26, 2010


Damn. Now I've got Hay Wrap by the Saw Doctors stuck in my head.
posted by kersplunk at 5:11 PM on August 26, 2010


You will need to sign into YouTube because there is a (distant) bare bottom

Here it is embedded.

And here's something else.
posted by homunculus at 5:26 PM on August 26, 2010


Yup. That's something else, all right.
posted by MrVisible at 5:32 PM on August 26, 2010


Damnit, for NSFW I was expecting country boys and girls gettin' down on the farm.
posted by Halloween Jack at 5:37 PM on August 26, 2010


Damn it. Despite the fact that it's so obviously fake, dollars to donuts this is going to show up on next season's Mythbusters.

BECAUSE IT'S THE FAMOUS INTERNET MYTH OF THE HAYBALER!
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 5:54 PM on August 26, 2010


I can't wait for the scaled down test of concept.
posted by found missing at 5:56 PM on August 26, 2010


Or, the hay baler exploded at the end of the show.
posted by found missing at 6:03 PM on August 26, 2010


There's a snippet of some sort of Germanic language at the end. Maybe this is from a TV commercial?
Also, the crop in the field looks nothing like the bales that are coming out of the machine; they look more like straw bales than hay.
posted by Flashman at 6:08 PM on August 26, 2010


Wheee!
posted by homunculus at 6:35 PM on August 26, 2010 [1 favorite]


I'm actually shocked that there aren't more videos of people getting stuff through the Christmas tree netters.
posted by valkyryn at 6:38 PM on August 26, 2010


Hey, hold my beer!
posted by Kloryne at 6:40 PM on August 26, 2010 [1 favorite]


Man, that Chris Burden doesn't care what he does to himself.
posted by Lentrohamsanin at 6:41 PM on August 26, 2010


Wheee!

Okay, that's pretty amazing.
posted by Devils Rancher at 8:24 PM on August 26, 2010


I did some summer work on a dairy for a few years. We had round baler for making hay and silage, which meant that we had a device called a baling fork which was essentially a giant fondue skewer for picking up round bales with a tractor. Young, dumb and bored, we sharpened the tips of it with a bench grinder and took turns ramming it though abandoned structures on the farm. That was fun.
posted by peeedro at 8:53 PM on August 26, 2010 [1 favorite]


I don't know a thing about hay balers, but I know it's fake because professional camera operators hired to make fake videos (or perhaps fake video directors?) all think that average people can't hold a video camera even vaguely still. Click any of the related videos, and I bet the camera work isn't half as bad in any of them.
posted by markr at 1:59 AM on August 27, 2010


professional camera operators hired to make fake videos

It's pretty clear something weird is going on at 0:41 as well during the camera shake. There's no way the camera operator could have covered that amount of ground so fast.
posted by phaedon at 2:12 AM on August 27, 2010


But since it is fake, what could this possible be a viral for? (don't answer that)

Oh come on, isn't that the whole point?

My head says it's either Farmville or Shredded Wheat.

But my heart really hopes it's a new, edgy superhero: Hay Man!
posted by rokusan at 5:02 AM on August 27, 2010


Having played in a hay baler as a kid, I can definitely say this guy would be dead. We used to crawl through a defunct one, my buddy and I, just for fun, and even playing in the broken one was scary.

"Also, stacking hay in a hay loft is pretty bad too."

Been there, done that - ONCE. The pay wasn't worth it!
posted by caution live frogs at 7:42 AM on August 27, 2010 [1 favorite]


infinitefloatingbrains: "Hay bales are essentially compressed hay wrapped in twine. The compression comes from a panel smashing hay over and over, creating small layers of flattened hay that are pancaked horizontally. If the video were real, the guy would come out decapitated, mangled, pulverized, and wrapped in twine."

Christ, that reminds me of The Mangler by Stephen King:

'"It tried to fold everything,' he said to Jackson, tasting bile in his throat. 'But a person isn't a sheet, Mark. What I saw. . . what was left of her . . .'

"Like Stanner, the hapless foreman, he could not finish. 'They took her out in a basket,' he said softly."
posted by bwg at 7:59 AM on August 27, 2010


There's a snippet of some sort of Germanic language at the end. Maybe this is from a TV commercial?

It's Suomi - Finnish. I don't read or speak it, so i can't translate tykylevit's youtube channel, but here's his website. I guess it could be an elaborate viral marketing campaign, but there are 809 videos uploaded so far, many of them strange, yet compelling. seems like a lot of work without any clear product endorsement. Other than Harleys. And beards.

then there's the 23 part drum lesson...

here's a little info, plus more links from viceland.

also, haying is maybe the hardest work i've ever done.
posted by dubold at 8:02 AM on August 27, 2010


oh, some links are NSFW for male nudity.
posted by dubold at 8:03 AM on August 27, 2010


My brother-in-law lost part of his index finger when, with left hand in baler and responding to 12 y.o. son shouting "Start it now?", he responded "No!" Son took that as "Go!", leaving b-i-l with a weird knobby 3/4 finger, perfect for tamping pipes, if he had only smoked one.

So, yeah, fake.
posted by beelzbubba at 8:04 AM on August 27, 2010


rokusan: My head says it's either Farmville or Shredded Wheat.

I'm picturing this guy going "The kid in me likes the frosted side!"
posted by xedrik at 8:44 AM on August 27, 2010


So, yeah, fake.

This might be a metaphoric interpretation of the experience of a summer of baling.

I worked five or six summers on an (estimate) 75000 bale operation. It was dangerous work. The best thing about it was the sunset light on the last wagon loaded of the season.

Also, there was a swell Bugs Bunny square-dance-calling sequence involving hog-wallowing and hay-baling.
posted by ovvl at 5:03 PM on August 27, 2010


Been there, done that - ONCE. The pay wasn't worth it!

You got paid? A couple time a month I get to pay for the privilege of loading, unloading and stacking hay. Oh the joys of owning horses.
posted by Tenuki at 12:39 PM on August 29, 2010


I thought this was a Saw Doctors video:
http://connemara.com/video/index.aspx?videoid=Fwv_TGoxXtg
posted by wenestvedt at 6:47 AM on August 30, 2010


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