O'BRIEN: I remember that you did something with Carson where Carson stole your car.
LETTERMAN: Yeah, that's right.
O'BRIEN: This is something that at the time I couldn't tell how much of this is fact, how much of it is fiction. Can you straighten it out for us?
LETTERMAN: Well, from what you said so far, it's all true. Johnny Carson and I -- I used to live in a part of Malibu. It's called Point Doom, and it's just this beautiful little neighborhood, and it kind of juts out into the Pacific. Now, Johnny Carson lived in the eight million dollar side of town, and I lived in about the hundred thousand dollar side of town, and I had in those days -- and still do -- a 1973 Chevy pickup truck, and the thing that I loved about this truck was it was just beat to hell. There's like a thousand dents, and because of the sea air, all of these dents would rust, and it really got to be quite an eye sore, but the uglier it got the more pride I had in having this pickup truck parked outside of my house. So one day I was a guest on Johnny's show -- you remember Johnny--
(Audience laughs)
O'BRIEN: It's all so vague. I'm 14 years old. This is a clip-on tie.
(Audience laughs)
LETTERMAN: And so, you know, I'm on the Tonight Show telling my little stories and trying to get laughs and dropping my pants and whatever you got to do to get laughs, and so Johnny, I can tell, doesn't really -- he's not paying attention to anything I say. I can see in his eyes that he's waiting to pull the pin on a grenade. He can hardly wait to get to this moment. So finally I wrap up my little skits, my little song and dance, and I'm looking around, and Johnny says, "Why don't you tell me about that piece of junk you've got parked out in front of your house..."
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posted by tylerkaraszewski at 7:31 PM on December 14, 2010 [1 favorite]