The Ultimate Warrior

April 15, 2005 12:46 PM

Earlier this month, the Young Republicans of UConn invited WWE wrestler The Ultimate Warrior to speak at their school, but things got a little out of hand: (via ComicCon) "People started yelling at Warrior as he spoke. Warrior at one point started yelling and stomping his feet, telling everyone to not talk while he is and to ask questions after his speech. Officers were eventually called in to calm things down. The group that brought Warrior in, the College Republicans, apologized heavily for bringing Warrior in after the speech ended. Statements that really got the crowd upset were when Warrior said queering don't make the world work and told an Iranian girl to get a towel." A week later, The Ultimate Warrior has strong, often-hilarious words for hecklers and Young Republicans alike. Not content with threatening college students, Ultimate Warrior also threatened libel against SomethingAwful last week.
posted by dhoyt (55 comments total)

Was anyone expecting thoughtful erudition from this guy or something?
posted by jonmc at 12:55 PM on April 15, 2005

From UW's retort:

And Emily Salisbury. Why the feigned innocence and proper and demure demeanor as if you hold so high and reverently true femininity and traditional Conservative principles? Why, when you so easily bed yourself with those who would savagely, in Genghis Khan fashion, laugh while “lying upon your lily white belly” raping you and the quality of your future family’s life? What is it about history you don’t quite understand Ms. Young College Republican? What is it exactly you don’t get about that today’s liberalism is simply a euphemism for all the other historically failed “isms’ -- Stalinism, Communism, Marxism, Socialism -- of the past? What is you know that you can enlighten me about on how to negotiate with tyranny and dictators and win? Please tell us. I'm not the only one who'd like to know. What is it you don’t get about that colonial women had bigger balls than today’s men and they fought like wild, ferociously-clawing tigers capitulating nothing to the murderers who raped them while their children were made to watch, just before they all died slow, humiliating deaths?

A flair for the overstatement.
posted by dhoyt at 12:56 PM on April 15, 2005

I have nothing to add to this except: AWESOME.

Well: hilarious!


Aw man, you just can't beat this:

A little advice -- don’t try to out-diss or talk over a guy who’s skilled in doing pro-wrestling promos, especially after he grabs a mike to get the job done even better.
posted by xmutex at 12:58 PM on April 15, 2005

"I knew Abdullah the Butcher, and you sir are no Abdullah the Butcher."
posted by trondant at 12:58 PM on April 15, 2005

Threatening libel against Something Awful. Poor guy. Pretty soon we'll all know his home address, and they'll have pictures of his home and family. Don't fuck with the SA goons.
posted by graventy at 1:01 PM on April 15, 2005

From DailyCampus (reg req):

What was to be a lecture on the differences between liberalism and conservatism became heated Tuesday when the man known simply as Warrior came to the Dodd Center.

The night quickly changed from a love fest over the Ultimate Warrior and his career in what was then known as the World Wrestling Federation (WWF) to an attack on his personal beliefs. The Warrior - who Norm Moghtaderi, a 10th-semester sociology and history major, felt was homophobic and racist - was met with unhappy members of the Tent City protest group.

"People like this should not be allowed to spat this off without being countered," said Geoff Traugh, a 4th-semester peace studies and political science major.

The dispute between Traugh and Warrior escalated. Warrior screamed back and stomped on the stage saying questions would be answered during the question and answer segment.

After the event eased down, Warrior answered questions about wrestling. Students wanted to discuss the feeling of winning, if the matches were planned and if he was still in contact with Hulk Hogan.

posted by dhoyt at 1:03 PM on April 15, 2005

Wow, that bit with the Something Awful guy is just tremendous.
posted by xmutex at 1:08 PM on April 15, 2005

A flair for the overstatement.

Yeah, as opposed to the understated eloquence of bringing in a professional wrestler to insult foreigners and homosexuals. Don't you ever get tired of being such a passive apologist?
posted by Armitage Shanks at 1:09 PM on April 15, 2005

Dude, Armitage, dhoyt was making fun of a comment from the Warrior.

Keep pace.
posted by xmutex at 1:11 PM on April 15, 2005

I love it when conservatives, called out on their bigotry, defend themselves by saying it's bigotry to label someone a bigot.

Also, a wrestler? Yeah, WTF?
posted by fungible at 1:12 PM on April 15, 2005

Dude, I thought the "Don't Mess with Something Awful" pamphlet came with every ISP signup kit. Lewis called his dad a candy ass! Hahaha, comedy gold.
posted by sugarfish at 1:17 PM on April 15, 2005

Yeah, as opposed to the understated eloquence of bringing in a professional wrestler to insult foreigners and homosexuals. Don't you ever get tired of being such a passive apologist?

?

I was poking fun of a totally over-the-top, ridiculous statement about clawing tigers & rape & Stalin—same as I'd mentioned earlier ("Ultimate Warrior has strong, often-hilarious words...") If I'd said it was an understatement, that would make sense.

An 'apologist'? For whom?
posted by dhoyt at 1:17 PM on April 15, 2005

And yes, the Ultimate Warrior really has an Earthlink email address... an ULTIMATE Earthlink address.

[this is good]
posted by fire&wings at 1:18 PM on April 15, 2005

Didn't Jesse Ventura teach this guy anything?
posted by jonmc at 1:21 PM on April 15, 2005

My favorite part is this.
if you can't get motivated to work out, you can pay warrior to call and yell at you until you do.

It should also be mentioned that his legal name is Warrior. He changed it during a trademark dispute with TitanSports.
posted by Lusy P Hur at 1:23 PM on April 15, 2005

My legal name is "Hurrrggghhhhhh", so neither of you pansies better sue me.
posted by Divine_Wino at 1:36 PM on April 15, 2005

*hits everybody on the head with folding chairs*
posted by jonmc at 1:38 PM on April 15, 2005

C'mon guys, these debates are fixed. How else do you think that the ref didn't see Warrior hitting that guy with a folding chair?
posted by WinnipegDragon at 1:39 PM on April 15, 2005

*Runs out from the sidelines, hits people while the ref isn't looking, then runs away*
posted by unreason at 1:43 PM on April 15, 2005

Are we supposed to transfer our offense from this jerk to republicans everywhere? Because so far I just think that he's a jerk of a wrestler and a poor choice of public speakers, but I'm not feeling today's two-minute hate at Republicans yet.
posted by thedevildancedlightly at 1:45 PM on April 15, 2005

Has anyone gotten Lou Albano's take on all this?
posted by jonmc at 1:46 PM on April 15, 2005

Warrior: "Come on, admit it. You left knowing that you need people like me, people who draw an objective moral line between rightand wrong, true and false, good and evil, so that you can go right along and misbehave knowing someone responsible will be there to pick up the broken pieces of your life after you’ve squandered all your chances. Lucky you - even some of those you hate will be the superglue to sustain your existence."

I'm so moved. Thank god someone's willing to draw an objective moral line.
posted by COBRA! at 1:48 PM on April 15, 2005

Are we supposed to transfer our offense from this jerk to republicans everywhere?

Yes. Clearly. Especially since John McCain basically steals the Warrior's act all the time.
posted by COBRA! at 1:50 PM on April 15, 2005

Armitage Shanks: Don't you ever get tired of being such a passive apologist?

thedevildancedlightly: Are we supposed to transfer our offense from this jerk to republicans everywhere? Because so far I just think that he's a jerk of a wrestler and a poor choice of public speakers, but I'm not feeling today's two-minute hate at Republicans yet.

One from column A, one from column B: congratulations dhoyt, you must be doing something right.
posted by PinkStainlessTail at 1:52 PM on April 15, 2005

but I'm not feeling today's two-minute hate at Republicans yet.

I was hoping the all-around silliness displayed by UW, The Young Republicans and the hecklers alike would make that unnecessary. In short, there is a variety of things to mock, most especially UW's overheated prose.
posted by dhoyt at 1:54 PM on April 15, 2005

Hey Divine_Wino, every time I masturbate, I say your name. Do I need to pay you usage fees, or something?
posted by graventy at 1:59 PM on April 15, 2005

I went with creative commons for whackoff purposes. Non-commercial Attribution is fine.
posted by Divine_Wino at 2:02 PM on April 15, 2005

Heh, I heard about this the morning after the talk. The guy who had had a large hand in organizing it was standing at my favorite lunch truck, Lizzie's bleary eyed. I don't know if he was the head of the College Republicans or not, but he'd definitely spent the rest of the night drinking his troubles away. I'm as non-Republican as they get, but this guy was truly contrite.

Go you Huskies!
posted by ontic at 2:09 PM on April 15, 2005

Someone fill me in on the Do Not Fuck With Something Awful Rule. Does something awful happen if you do?
posted by letitrain at 2:21 PM on April 15, 2005

The Iron Sheik must be really offended right now. The Something Awful thing was inspired.
posted by drezdn at 2:27 PM on April 15, 2005

I enjoyed reading Warrior's rant. Don't agree with almost anything he says but I appreciate that he is totally up front about his beliefs. He reminds me of Rorschach from Watchmen. Good set of links.
posted by Joey Michaels at 2:27 PM on April 15, 2005

College students do something silly. News at 11.

Though, frankly, it's about time we got to smear the Republican party with every idiotic thing their college-age representatives do (Other amusing examples: "Hey Hey Ho Ho Social Security has got to go"). I mean, every random left-wing guy who put up a flyer somewhere on campus has been used by right-wingers as a liberal boogeyman over the past 20 years. I'm just happy that the right-wing youth are finally getting confident enough to embarass their own party in public.
posted by deanc at 2:30 PM on April 15, 2005

Could The Ultimate Warrior have taken down The Auditor, though? There's the real question.

Oh, and nice call on Rorschach.
posted by COBRA! at 2:31 PM on April 15, 2005

Are we supposed to transfer our offense from this jerk to republicans everywhere?

I wasn't going to, until I read the part where the "College Republicans" linked to "neutral" versions of "what really happened", which summed up the altercation as: A bunch of screaming liberal yahoos, passing out flyers and asking abusive questions, attempted to make our esteemed guest speaker seem like a racist and homophobe, thereby limiting his first amendment rights.

"The hypocritical irony is that Warrior was accused of intolerance, when THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT THE STUDENTS WERE OF HIM, INTOLERANT."

I mean, I know they're just in college, but Congressional Republicans say this kind of shit all the time.

Also, that Something Awful stuff is priceless. Thanks!
posted by fungible at 2:32 PM on April 15, 2005

I heard that the Ultimate Warrior is a racist. And homo.
*crosses fingers, waits for funny libel notice/threat against loved ones*
posted by underer at 2:32 PM on April 15, 2005

An 'apologist'? For whom?

The next time you say that, dhoyt, make sure you're wearing pink tights and a mask, and be sure to yell a little louder into the mic. Your comments would be funnier and less tragic.
posted by AlexReynolds at 2:36 PM on April 15, 2005

fungable: This seems to be a common tactic, even more, you have people like Horowitz calling for free speech on campuses but demanding that protesters be arrested and reporting to their deans for exercising said speech.
posted by KirkJobSluder at 2:56 PM on April 15, 2005

oops, that should be "reported to their deans."

Overall, I've become convinced that conservatives are not as interested in free speech, as just setting up the rules in their favor.
posted by KirkJobSluder at 3:01 PM on April 15, 2005

"We are the GENERALS and YOU are the ENEMY!"
/Ren and Stimpy.

This is comedy gold.
"And when your candy ass is slacking on your workout and thinkin' about tongue-kissin' dudes, that's when the WARRIOR will kick your ass back into heterosexuality with his bronzed and oiled PECS! UUHHRGH!" (from Ultimate Workout, tape #6).
posted by klangklangston at 3:21 PM on April 15, 2005

Dude, Armitage, dhoyt was making fun of a comment from the Warrior.

Yeah. mea culpa. It was a really dumb comment. My apologies to dhoyt.
posted by Armitage Shanks at 3:24 PM on April 15, 2005

Methinks that Mr. Warrior has had more than his fair share of blows to the head already... one could only wish that he's invited to more college campuses by local Young Republicans though, it really sends an unmistakeable message, doesn't it?
posted by clevershark at 3:40 PM on April 15, 2005

No sweat, Armitage. I assure you, my apologism only extends to Ravishing Rick Rude, as I stayed loyal to him throughout the infamous Rude-Warrior feuds of the early-90s.

/fifteen years out of the wrestling-trivia loop, and proud
posted by dhoyt at 3:46 PM on April 15, 2005

What is it exactly you don’t get about that today’s liberalism is simply a euphemism for all the other historically failed “isms’ -- Stalinism, Communism, Marxism, Socialism -- of the past?

What about Conservatism?
posted by nTeleKy at 3:47 PM on April 15, 2005

Wait. "Queering won't make the world work?"

What a sad, sad little ultimate warring man.
posted by ColdChef at 4:24 PM on April 15, 2005

"Cocaine's a hell of a drug" -Rick James

Just try and tell me the warrior wasn't geeking during the 80's. Go on and try. Hell, between the blow and the 'roids, we should all be congratulating this guy on having two neurons left to spark together, let alone being with it enough to make a total ass of himself at a college.

So here's to you Warrior, Man, Wrestler, Cautionary Example, hats off!
posted by Grimgrin at 4:39 PM on April 15, 2005

There is something so distinctly American about this guy. It's like an actor doing an over the top impersonation of a comic book character. The good news is, this won't be forgotten. It's on the internet. In a decade or so people will look back and see this guy for what he was.
posted by nixerman at 4:47 PM on April 15, 2005

As a former rasslin' fan and current raving lefty, I should be all over this thread. But all I can do is laugh at the beautiful comments before me. This is entertainment. Thanks.
posted by the_savage_mind at 4:53 PM on April 15, 2005

nixerman : "It's like an actor doing an over the top impersonation of a comic book character."

Well, wresters are actors, and, regarding comic books...let me direct you to this.
posted by Bugbread at 4:58 PM on April 15, 2005

Yeah. mea culpa. It was a really dumb comment. My apologies to dhoyt.

This sort of cool-headed rational common sense isn't going to fly around here. You have to leave room for people to flame one another.
posted by xmutex at 4:58 PM on April 15, 2005

Living in France, I often describe American politics as a wrestling match when people ask my opinion.

... I just never thought I would have such a solid example.

Too bad they don't know who Warrior is.

UConn Young Republicans really deserve all the problems they get for making the decision to invite such a zero.
At the risk of sounding elitist, how is it possible that this guy is actually on a speaking circuit in American universities? Seriously. I mean, Nature Boy Rick Flair I can imagine, but the Ultimate Warrior?!? WTF
posted by pwedza at 5:43 PM on April 15, 2005

Dude, pwedza, if you are mixing 'elitist' with 'American Universities' circa 2005, I think we've found the source of your confusion.
posted by the_savage_mind at 5:49 PM on April 15, 2005

you may be right, Savage.

For the record, by American politics I mean more specifically American political discourse.
posted by pwedza at 6:00 PM on April 15, 2005

Is it just me, or was the Ultimate Lawyer breaking the law with some of those letters? They sounded like threats to me...

"Bottom line - if you're going to talk tough, you need to be prepared to back that up. To use the old (but in this case, appropriate) cliche, you're letting your mouth write checks that your body can't possibly cash."
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 6:26 AM on April 16, 2005

I wonder if Warrior was still around when Bob Mould was writing the wrestling scripts. If so, queering made his world go 'round.
posted by klangklangston at 7:33 AM on April 16, 2005

Gee, Young Republican's can't understnd the difference between an actor and the part he plays.

I'm *SO* hopeful for the future.
posted by rough ashlar at 8:26 AM on April 16, 2005