The slinging power of a slingshot, mixed with the stabbing power of a machete
April 6, 2011 9:42 PM   Subscribe

A slingshot that shoots machetes.

You may, at this point, be wondering if perhaps there is a youtube channel dedicated to a man and his slingshots? There is. There most certainly is.

Is there a blog for this bald slingshot genius? Is there ever!

It's like they say over at the Slingshot forum: "Join for the slingshots, stay for the people."
posted by codacorolla (58 comments total) 11 users marked this as a favorite
 
Leave this to the experts. And the stupid experts.

I approve of his honesty.
posted by phunniemee at 9:49 PM on April 6, 2011 [4 favorites]


That doesn't sound safe.
posted by mazola at 10:00 PM on April 6, 2011


From the comments:
Am i the only one who thinks that is crap? it just falls off the end.. i bet it wouldnt even fire more than 10m

Reply by the video owner:
Ah, a bet, that's the spirit. OK, come over to Germany. Stand 11 meters away from me while I fire at you. If you win, I will pick up the airfare bill. If you loose, you donate your corpse to science. :-)
posted by esprit de l'escalier at 10:01 PM on April 6, 2011 [36 favorites]


Haha, I was just going to quote that exchange.
posted by delmoi at 10:01 PM on April 6, 2011


Someone *is* eventually going to try to build a cyborg bear with chainsaw arms, aren't they.
posted by weston at 10:01 PM on April 6, 2011


I was worried that this was a slingshot designed to shoot Machette.
posted by birdherder at 10:03 PM on April 6, 2011 [1 favorite]


Eventually?

I've got two working prototypes in my garage!
posted by Windopaene at 10:03 PM on April 6, 2011


There's a man who knows what he wants, and he knows how to get it.
posted by Diablevert at 10:04 PM on April 6, 2011 [3 favorites]


I enjoyed the bonus footage. I like like the way he does a "zoolander" to camera after each shot.
posted by bonobothegreat at 10:05 PM on April 6, 2011


What's next, he'll release the dogs? or the bees? or the dogs with bees in their mouths so when they bark they shoot bees at you?
posted by knave at 10:10 PM on April 6, 2011 [3 favorites]


That's a hilarious exchange, though I do wish he'd shown us footage of him firing in the open, just to see how far it could go.
posted by Conrad Cornelius o'Donald o'Dell at 10:11 PM on April 6, 2011


I like like the way he does a "zoolander" to camera after each shot.

That would be a 'Blue Steel'.
posted by jimmythefish at 10:14 PM on April 6, 2011 [3 favorites]


There's something surprisingly adorable about that fellow. Probably a combination of natural charm and complete self-awareness of how simultaneously ridiculous and awesome his chosen hobby is.
posted by you're a kitty! at 10:18 PM on April 6, 2011 [8 favorites]


The first thing I thought of was that girl that got blasted in the face by the watermelon on Amazing Race.
posted by The Hamms Bear at 10:22 PM on April 6, 2011 [1 favorite]


Very effective. Some power.
posted by stbalbach at 10:27 PM on April 6, 2011


I enjoyed the bonus footage. I like like the way he does a "zoolander" to camera after each shot.

The cat in the background at the beginning of the bonus footage made me jump for just a second. "Ruuuuun!", I thought.
posted by Lukenlogs at 10:35 PM on April 6, 2011


Weird, I just stumbled across this guy last week. JoergS is, unsurprisingly, also on the Zombie Squad forum. He uses coconuts as a zombie skull substitute..
posted by benzenedream at 10:40 PM on April 6, 2011


His slingshots are pretty awesome. They are pretty deadly by nature but since they are wielded by a man with gorilla strength it makes it seem doubly so.
posted by zephyr_words at 11:23 PM on April 6, 2011 [1 favorite]


I live slingshots. Simple, low cost plinking even kids can make. I certainly did. I still do.

Another chance to revisit Rufus Hussey, legendary beanshooter marksman.
posted by 2N2222 at 11:34 PM on April 6, 2011 [6 favorites]


Everything is fine until he laughs. Its when you begin to understand that he is making the things of his dreams, and that those things could kill people.
posted by Felex at 11:42 PM on April 6, 2011 [5 favorites]


Rufus Hussey didn't need no machete.
posted by BitterOldPunk at 11:48 PM on April 6, 2011 [1 favorite]


I can only hope that someday I have the privilege of saying something as awesome as "heh heh, I won't do this again in a t-shirt. heh. I was lucky I was wearing a facemask! heh heh."
posted by auto-correct at 11:56 PM on April 6, 2011 [3 favorites]


I am disappointed by the choice of target.
posted by chillmost at 12:48 AM on April 7, 2011


I am disappointed by the choice of target.

But it was 6 thick pieces of cardboard!
posted by zephyr_words at 12:58 AM on April 7, 2011


You know, the JETS team member inside of me thinks this is as awesome as a potato gun.

The dude who read all sorts of heinous shit that happened in Rwanda with the Hutus and Tutsis sees this as gross.

I know. I'm such a debbie downer. But the practical application is just gross. Yeah, I know there are all sorts of MIT nerds working on lasers and shit that will do worse stuff to a lot more people. I can't stop thinking that this is akin to someone making a cheaper and more accurate AK-47. This just kinda creeps me out at a very deep level. I guess it would be like if this guy said "Eeets very good for ze shooting at ze neighborhood cats problems." and mefites having a problem with it there.

Sorry.
posted by hal_c_on at 2:21 AM on April 7, 2011


He's a hardcore survivalist. That goofy shit about defending yourself from zombies is the fun face on a preoccupation with being ready to kill the people who are coming for them. You know, those people.

If he ever snaps and starts practicing on his neighbors, good luck arresting him. I bet (yes, he can pay my air fare) he has seventeen man traps in and around his house, a couple of decoy escape tunnels that will collapse if you don't know their secrets, and a real tunnel leading to the city sewer. While his house is exploding and burning, he'll be snorkeling through the sewer using an infrared periscope he fashioned from army surplus binoculars and some plumbing parts.
posted by pracowity at 2:52 AM on April 7, 2011 [1 favorite]


Seconding this. Whenever you hear survivalists gun nuts talking about fighting 'zombies', they really mean niggers.
posted by ryanrs at 3:32 AM on April 7, 2011 [1 favorite]


I was pleased to note that the cat in the background of the bonus video had the good sense to disappear before he drew back (double arms'-length??? Jebeezuz!) on that pellet-shooter. ("Hey! Wanna see me tap a moving target?")
posted by Mike D at 4:20 AM on April 7, 2011


If he ever snaps and starts practicing on his neighbors, good luck arresting him.

Pretty sure police-issue firearms have a longer range than three meters. But if he was really a military survivalist who snapped and wanted to go on a spree I'm sure he's switch to weapons he knew worked; not his own versions of LEGO fantasy projects.

Seconding this. Whenever you hear survivalists gun nuts talking about fighting 'zombies', they really mean niggers.

Wow. Umm... Wow. Look, I don't disagree with your general statement; in fact in America I've long stood by the belief that a vast majority of gun nuts are secretly harboring their fantasy of legally killing another (usually minority) person but I honestly feel like that's such a blatant accusation against this one guy. Aware of the irony here, but legit question: is it the German accent or something?
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 4:22 AM on April 7, 2011 [4 favorites]


I'm absolutely certain this is how Captain Boomerang got his start, only with a boomerang fixation instead of a slingshot fixation - "What is a giant exploding boomerang for? Not much, except attracting attention on You-Tube."

It's OK, the good guys are ready for his inevitable descent into hubristic madness and crime... light the Angle-Grinder Man signal!
posted by Slap*Happy at 4:50 AM on April 7, 2011


On a preview... I think the accent is weirding people out too much. There's no evidence he's hateful or cruel. I enjoy modifying and shooting pellet guns - I am not a hunter, I don't shoot at pets, wildlife or people, I am not a gun-nut white supremacist.

Neither is this guy. Knock it off.
posted by Slap*Happy at 5:00 AM on April 7, 2011 [3 favorites]


I honestly feel like that's such a blatant accusation

Nope, not at all. I was just responding to pracowity's point about hard-core survivalists and zombies. I don't know anything about Mr. Machete other than what I saw in the video, so I can't say if he is one or not. Also, the zombie / black people thing may be specific to American gun nut survivalists, dunno what that scene is like in Germany.
posted by ryanrs at 5:10 AM on April 7, 2011


This is one of those things that, on the surface, sounds like something from The Simpsons. Surprisingly, it isn't, but I have to note that there is a Facebook group for Bart's slingshot.
posted by tommasz at 5:15 AM on April 7, 2011


Its when you begin to understand that he is making the things of his dreams, and that those things could kill people.

Yeah well I bet you don't have as big a problem with these guys' dreams. And they're spectacular.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 5:54 AM on April 7, 2011


Just to clarify any further ambiguities, slingshots and pellet guns do not make you a "gun nut survivalist". My accusations are reserved for the guys with four AK-47s and 20,000 rounds of ammunition buried in the woods. So barring other evidence, Mr. Machete is off the hook as far as I'm concerned. You too, Slap*Happy.

My point, which was poorly expressed, was that the word 'zombie', as used in some of the darker corners of the survivalist community, is very much a racist code word for black people. I figure that's news to many, if not most, metafilter members, which is why I mentioned it in the first place.

posted by ryanrs at 6:09 AM on April 7, 2011


Repeated and chronic shooting of ~40g lead pellets around your back yard may induce machete-shooting delusions unless you're on city water.
posted by kuujjuarapik at 6:30 AM on April 7, 2011 [2 favorites]


Man, do I want the Mythbusters to make a 100-foot long version of this to test at Alameda.
posted by bwg at 6:39 AM on April 7, 2011 [1 favorite]


Oh god, one of my all-time favorite ridiculous comic panels come to life. From PUNISHER WAR JOURNAL #12:

"Hey, Mr. Wizard. What's this one do?"

"It's a gun, Frank. A gun that shoots swords."

posted by The demon that lives in the air at 6:41 AM on April 7, 2011 [5 favorites]


Everyone should watch that video 2N2222 posted. It just keeps getting better and better.
posted by six-or-six-thirty at 7:04 AM on April 7, 2011


i cant get over the fact he was wearing an ESPRIT shirt. that was like the logo "de rigeur" for puerto rican high school girls in the 80s. bonus points if you combined your espritwear with HELLO KITTY :D
posted by liza at 7:07 AM on April 7, 2011 [1 favorite]


Don't do what Donny Don't does.
posted by enkd at 8:18 AM on April 7, 2011


Can't people just appreciate tech for tech's sake? Slingshot tech is like any other tech, it's an amoral and intrinsically educational endeavor. In this case it's also a good upper-body workout. The guy enjoys building stuff and knows the risks involved. Don't judge his motives. I have dangerous hobbies too but that doesn't make me a murderous redneck.
posted by The Winsome Parker Lewis at 8:44 AM on April 7, 2011


In the video, he wears a face mask, but he doesn't talk about exactly why he wears it.

A long time ago, I built a very similar device. My gun was a bit smaller and shot large steel darts rather than machetes. The trigger mechanism was a little different, too. But overall, there was a striking similarity.

My gun, and probably his too, would occasionally misfire in a particularly dangerous way. Every now and then, the gun would fire the projectile directly backwards. I am not sure exactly why this occurs, but I suspect the projectile starts tumbling near the 'muzzle' of the gun. For whatever reason, the projectile fails to disengage from the rubber bands, pulls them out in front of the gun, and is then rockets directly back at the user. If the user is sighting down the 'barrel' of the gun, they receive a dart / machete straight to the face. Hence the face mask.

(As I was in middle school at the time, of course I didn't wear a face mask. I came very, very close to losing an eye in an especially gruesome way. Those darts could punch through soup cans. The funny thing is the only reason I constructed that weapon was because my parents refused to buy me a super soaker, because they "didn't believe in guns.")
posted by ryanrs at 8:55 AM on April 7, 2011


TL;DW but I once used a water balloon slingshot to fire a golf ball as part of my HS physics class. It got stuck in the sling on the way out and came right back at me, hitting my chest. It left a bruise about 6" across and a lump about a half inch high.

This is not a good idea.
posted by pjaust at 9:04 AM on April 7, 2011


As long as we're critiquing this guy's invention, I feel compelled to point out that the machete is a slashing weapon. I believe a rapier slingshot would pierce far more cardboard than these machetes.
posted by ryanrs at 9:37 AM on April 7, 2011 [2 favorites]


(As I was in middle school at the time, of course I didn't wear a face mask. I came very, very close to losing an eye in an especially gruesome way. Those darts could punch through soup cans. The funny thing is the only reason I constructed that weapon was because my parents refused to buy me a super soaker, because they "didn't believe in guns.")

God, it's like you could be my long-lost older brother.
posted by thsmchnekllsfascists at 9:57 AM on April 7, 2011 [1 favorite]


God, it's like you could be my long-lost older brother.

Heh. The major problem with my giant dart gun, other than occasionally shooting at the user, was that it couldn't be used against entertaining targets. It was a weapon of destruction, when what I really wanted was a weapon of creative mischief and harassment. That's why I wanted a super soaker, after all. My subsequent invention of the mud cannon was much more satisfying in that regard.
posted by ryanrs at 12:47 PM on April 7, 2011 [1 favorite]


Mine was a extremely rickety bow and arrow. 1/3 of the time, the string would snap, 1/3 of the time it worked WAY too well, and 1/3 of the time the notch would get stuck on the string, turning into wobbly, pointy-ended reciprocating death machine.
posted by thsmchnekllsfascists at 12:52 PM on April 7, 2011


10-foot "barrel," and you have to be 4 feet from the target? Yeah right.

I can't fly to Germany. Much easier for dude to simply make an impressive video, if it really works from a distance.
posted by rahnefan at 1:18 PM on April 7, 2011


It won't look impressive on video. Machetes are pretty heavy and his gun has a light draw, so the machete will not have much speed. Although the machete will carry enough momentum to do damage at distance, it will travel in a highly arced path. At any respectable distance, you'd have to aim the device like it was a machete mortar, rather than a machete gun.

That was my experience, anyway. Shooting heavier darts dramatically cut my gun's range. The problem wasn't easily solved by length, either. What was really needed was increased draw weight. To shoot machetes with anything resembling a flat trajectory, you'd need a rubber band so thick you wouldn't be able to stretch it without some sort of block and tackle or geared windlass.
posted by ryanrs at 1:55 PM on April 7, 2011


Poodle gun.
posted by Belle O'Cosity at 5:36 PM on April 7, 2011 [1 favorite]


Seconding this. Whenever you hear survivalists gun nuts talking about fighting 'zombies', they really mean...

Funny, I have several guns (I can't afford 20,000 rounds of ammo, and have no place to bury them). And I talk about fighting 'zombies'.

And what I really mean are military oppressors implementing "emergency measures" or martial law. You know, like the thugs running the middle east.

Far out and unlikely and paranoid? Probably. But, it's not racist. Just anti-authoritarian.
posted by Netzapper at 7:13 PM on April 7, 2011 [1 favorite]


Man, this exchange from the coconut video just cracked me up:
First off , I gotta say this is awesome! Secondly would it be possible to put a dildo in a slingshot and get it in a "number two" target?
- kosser321

@kosser321 Well, come visit me, bring your dildo and your "number two" and we'll find out. You will be famous in no time.
- JoergSprave
posted by Conrad Cornelius o'Donald o'Dell at 8:32 PM on April 7, 2011 [4 favorites]


You know you're a tough customer when 90% of conversations you have end with an invitation to come to your house and get shot with something by a slingshot.
posted by codacorolla at 9:55 PM on April 7, 2011


Nah. Tough is offering to pay the airfare for their epic ass whooping.
posted by rahnefan at 11:24 AM on April 11, 2011


Gatling Slingshot. That is all.
posted by thsmchnekllsfascists at 3:37 PM on April 25, 2011


Gatling Slingshot. yt That is all.

I would most definitely want a hand-guard between my knuckles and 8 slingshot balls under high tension.
posted by codacorolla at 4:03 PM on April 25, 2011


Me too. But this guy is crazy. He was comfortable with a machete at high tension right by his face.
posted by thsmchnekllsfascists at 7:13 AM on April 26, 2011


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