NO NEWS

September 11, 2012 11:19 AM

Breaking: There Is No News A supercut of awkward silences in news reports.
posted by The Whelk (33 comments total)

Well, no gnus is good gnus
posted by Ad hominem at 11:23 AM on September 11, 2012 [3 favorites]

...
posted by ceribus peribus at 11:23 AM on September 11, 2012 [1 favorite]

Direct yt link
posted by XMLicious at 11:24 AM on September 11, 2012 [3 favorites]

These green beans are choice, yo.
posted by bondcliff at 11:26 AM on September 11, 2012 [4 favorites]

This is made by Adam Buxton, of Adam and Joe fame.
posted by MuffinMan at 11:26 AM on September 11, 2012 [1 favorite]

This is better than most art films
posted by nathancaswell at 11:28 AM on September 11, 2012

Pounding nails into your eyes with your bare hands is better than most art films.
posted by unSane at 11:31 AM on September 11, 2012 [5 favorites]

This is almost as uncomfortable.
posted by unSane at 11:32 AM on September 11, 2012

Don't give them any ideas.
posted by zombieflanders at 11:32 AM on September 11, 2012

It's split screens, right? They've stitched together footage of what the right-hand anchor is doing while the left-hand anchor is reading the news, together with footage of what the left-hand anchor is doing while the right-hand anchor is reading the news. Rarely does something on-set cross the entire screen horizontally, so the compositing is probably pretty easy.

That's my guess, anyway.
posted by gauche at 11:32 AM on September 11, 2012

It's split screens, right?

No, just human error.
posted by mrnutty at 11:33 AM on September 11, 2012

Very funny, though hardly a supercut (more a mashup of awkward silences from two UK news programmes).
posted by mediated self at 11:35 AM on September 11, 2012

Could've done without the jarring static bursts. Nobody sees those any more anyway, and there's no reason to put them in a Youtube video.

But I liked it! Ironically, it says something.
posted by echo target at 11:38 AM on September 11, 2012

Fakey fake fake. I think they just recorded some bits when the anchors were waiting for their cue.
posted by hot_monster at 11:38 AM on September 11, 2012

Fucking Paul.
posted by mullacc at 11:39 AM on September 11, 2012

This could work very well as an art installation, if you projected one newsperson (or pair of newspeople) onto each of the four walls in a darkened room and left it to run in a continuous loop. You'd have to get rid of the annoying static thing between transitions, however, so you'd have just the ambient room sound with the occasional on-screen clearing of a throat or rustling of papers.
posted by Atom Eyes at 11:42 AM on September 11, 2012 [1 favorite]

I read about a portrait exhibit where the artist had made his models hold a pose for a couple of minutes, recorded as video, made seamless loops out of them, and played them back on big hi-def screens. They looked like regular portraits, but they'd blink and twitch a tiny bit. Bummed I didn't get to see it in person.
posted by echo target at 11:51 AM on September 11, 2012

Clayton Cubitt: Long Portrait.
posted by The Whelk at 11:53 AM on September 11, 2012 [2 favorites]

BEANS!
posted by blue_beetle at 11:56 AM on September 11, 2012

That moment at 0:55 where they both turn to look at each other at the same time was perfect. They were all like, "WTF? okay play it cool... pause a beat... now turn back to camera nonchalantly in 2... 1..."
posted by Rhomboid at 12:29 PM on September 11, 2012

Could've done without the jarring static bursts. Nobody sees those any more anyway, and there's no reason to put them in a Youtube video.

I think they need you over in the skeumorph thread.
posted by RobotHero at 12:35 PM on September 11, 2012 [1 favorite]

Why fake, when BBC is far more entertaining for real - BBC mistakes cab driver for IT expert ("a genuine misunderstanding"). Watch out for the cabbie's reaction when his name/expertise is announced.
posted by vidur at 12:52 PM on September 11, 2012 [3 favorites]

Awkward Silences in News Reports: film at 4' 33"
posted by chavenet at 12:59 PM on September 11, 2012 [4 favorites]

At first I thought this was a double because I've actually seen this before (a year ago, even) and MeFi typically finds all my weird youtube videos for me.

Until I realized it was from Adam Buxton. I may sorta stalk his youtube account (and actually just watched this one a couple days ago because I needed a little "pick-me-up" and despite the fact I practically have this one memorized, it never ceases to make me laugh until I'm literally tearing up).

But I think I found out about Adam Buxton from MeFi in the first place, so it comes full circle.
posted by paisley sheep at 1:54 PM on September 11, 2012 [2 favorites]

I preferred it when Supercuts mangled hair.
posted by dances_with_sneetches at 1:57 PM on September 11, 2012

Eason Jordan, Ken Lerer? Are you paying attention?
posted by wensink at 2:20 PM on September 11, 2012

I read about a portrait exhibit where the artist had made his models hold a pose for a couple of minutes, recorded as video, made seamless loops out of them, and played them back on big hi-def screens. They looked like regular portraits, but they'd blink and twitch a tiny bit. Bummed I didn't get to see it in person.

Then you might like to see this website of "living movie stills" done with animated gifs (Previously, 2, 3)
posted by straight at 2:22 PM on September 11, 2012 [1 favorite]

paisley sheep, thank you so much for that. I laughed so hard at "I CAN'T REATCH" my neighbor banged on the wall so I told him to go to fuck his graded's balls.
posted by beaucoupkevin at 4:25 PM on September 11, 2012 [1 favorite]

Signing for the Deaf
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 4:53 PM on September 11, 2012

I thought this one was the original, but it seems to be a year older. It's fantastic though.
posted by Science! at 6:35 PM on September 11, 2012

I preferred it when Supercuts mangled hair.

Oh, they still do, trust me.
posted by unSane at 8:07 PM on September 11, 2012

Did anyone else notice that they all have the same generic "newsroom" sound in the background. That can't possibly be natural while being so consistent, can it? Are all news reports underlain by generic newsroom noise tapes!?
posted by Buckt at 9:08 PM on September 11, 2012

Neat, thanks for reminding me of this old German satire.
posted by yoHighness at 6:18 PM on September 12, 2012