Insert snappy pun here

January 24, 2013 12:42 PM

With extensive flooding in Limpopo province the army have been called in to rescue residents from 15,000 escaped crocodiles.
posted by roofus (28 comments total)

Gah! Run in a zig zag for your lives!
posted by whimsicalnymph at 12:46 PM on January 24, 2013 [3 favorites]

Last time this happened the elephant got his trunk, so this is big news
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 12:49 PM on January 24, 2013 [9 favorites]

needs a "great grey-green, greasy Limpopo River" tag.
posted by the man of twists and turns at 12:50 PM on January 24, 2013 [14 favorites]

This is the biggest kick I ever got.
posted by ColdChef at 12:50 PM on January 24, 2013

Most of the recapturing takes place at night, when the crocodiles' eyes glow red when reflecting light.

nature plz stahp
posted by elizardbits at 12:52 PM on January 24, 2013 [1 favorite]

Animal safety experts warned the public to stay indoors and away from the crocodiles.

Okay, good idea, yes. But then you see that "The floods have killed at least 10 people in Limpopo province, including three children who died when their homes collapsed during heavy rain."

YOU CAN'T FUCKING WIN.
posted by elizardbits at 12:54 PM on January 24, 2013

Gah! Run in a zig zag for your lives!

Serpentine, Shelly, Serpentine!
posted by FelliniBlank at 12:56 PM on January 24, 2013 [1 favorite]

This is, quite literally, my worst nightmare.
posted by ChuraChura at 1:02 PM on January 24, 2013

Oh I think it could be worse. What if they could fly and/or open doors with their clever little hands, for example.
posted by elizardbits at 1:06 PM on January 24, 2013 [2 favorites]

What if they grabbed at your ankles from under the bed.
posted by elizardbits at 1:06 PM on January 24, 2013 [1 favorite]

i am a bad person
posted by elizardbits at 1:07 PM on January 24, 2013 [2 favorites]

:-(
posted by ChuraChura at 1:09 PM on January 24, 2013

ChuraChura: This is, quite literally, my worst nightmare.

My worst would be if the crocs were joined by sharks. And grizzly bears.
posted by Greg_Ace at 1:12 PM on January 24, 2013

I thought it said orcs when I first read a link abbreviated to crocs in a tiny tiny font size on another site.

I was very disappointed.
posted by Pudhoho at 1:16 PM on January 24, 2013

Clearly the only logical response is the Nopetopus.

NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE
posted by tzikeh at 1:34 PM on January 24, 2013 [3 favorites]

"We're running low on sandbags!"

"Stack the crocs!"
posted by mannequito at 1:36 PM on January 24, 2013

...open doors with their clever little hands, for example.

I'd imagine it would look a lot like this.

Sweet dreams
posted by jamaro at 1:37 PM on January 24, 2013 [2 favorites]

Jesus, fifteen THOUSAND crocodiles? How do you fit that many in the entire river, much less a farm?
posted by Conspire at 1:48 PM on January 24, 2013

They stack, like legos.
posted by elizardbits at 1:58 PM on January 24, 2013

Very, very scary. Crocs are SMART.
posted by bearwife at 2:02 PM on January 24, 2013

Crocodile Piers
posted by y2karl at 2:02 PM on January 24, 2013

oopsies
posted by Devils Rancher at 2:06 PM on January 24, 2013

Do I understand this right? They opened the gates to save just 1 house, and 15,000 crocodiles were let loose? Or was it to save the whole farm from being flooded?
posted by stowaway at 2:12 PM on January 24, 2013

Hullo, zeeba neighbuh.
posted by azpenguin at 3:05 PM on January 24, 2013 [1 favorite]

This is a job for Ace Rimmer!
posted by zippy at 3:16 PM on January 24, 2013

My worst nightmare would be if the crocodiles friended me on Facebook.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 3:53 PM on January 24, 2013 [2 favorites]

Arnie will save them!
posted by arzakh at 8:31 PM on January 24, 2013

RUN, RUN!

.. to your nearest ultra high end leather goods store, because the price of crocodile skin has just shot up.
posted by MuffinMan at 12:16 AM on January 25, 2013