Guards at Area 51 protest low wages.

December 11, 2001 6:24 PM

Guards at Area 51 protest low wages. Maybe the greys from Zeta Reticuli are behind on their rent?
posted by gimonca (8 comments total)

What they should be worried about it their exposure to toxic chemicals.

This is far more of a threat than those bug eyed Greys. Of course, it's hard for me to worry about their problems since they work at a facility that doesn't exist. ;)
posted by zeb vance at 7:01 PM on December 11, 2001

$15 an hour isn't bad pay for a security guard. That's a base salary of over $30K per year in an area of the country where the cost of living can't be that high.

But, yeah, it's not like they exist or anything, right?
posted by MAYORBOB at 7:42 PM on December 11, 2001

$15 an hour isn't bad pay for a security guard.


It's not like they're guarding a fucking 7-11 !

As an aside, a guy I know was stationed at Groom Lake. He wouldn't comment on "area 51", but he *did* say there was a "line of death" on the base. Meaning there was a line which if you crossed it, you would be shot.
posted by electro at 8:08 PM on December 11, 2001

$15 an hour and you get to shoot people? You'd think there'd be a text ad here.
posted by y2karl at 9:14 PM on December 11, 2001

Sounds about average for a security guard. They should probably get more pay for fending off people dressed in Star Trek uniforms half their day though.

Seriously, I used to get really into researching this whole Alien myth, but it seems to be pretty clear from just about everything I've seen that they were testing things like the Aurora spy plane.

If the public wants to believe they are housing aliens there, what better way to scare people away, and attract only geeksters who no-one's going to believe anyway?

My take on the alien abduction thing in the form of a brief vignette:

Alien 1 (Steve): "Hey Bob, you see that guy in the pickup driving all alone on an abandoned road down there?"

Alien 2 (Bob):"You mean the one with the gun racks and confederate flag?"

Alien 1 (Steve):"Yeah, let's pick him up and freak him out, maybe fly him around real fast, show him some visions ofthe apocalypse and, you know, probe him."

Alien 2 (Bob):"Man, you are SICK Steve. But hell, I like it! Let's go!"
posted by Kafkaesque at 9:35 PM on December 11, 2001

skallas, you've crossed the line of death. We're sending Manny over to, erm, have a little chat with you...
posted by Bixby23 at 12:47 AM on December 12, 2001

I *really* want to find out what goes on in Area 51.

See New 'Super Area 51' Said Being Built In Colorado (Jeff Rense website), which claims these sites are working with fusion research accelerators and technology developed by the Russians in the 80's called "Psychotronics" (PT)... a combination of Low Frequency and High Frequency waves beamed into the atmosphere at high power levels. The Russians experimented with these waves during the 80's and found them to be very effective but uncontrollable. Psychotronics is equivalent to "Electronic LSD" in that brain waves are scrambled causing mass hallucinations amongst personnel where the PT is concentrated.

Maybe the strikers are tripping.
posted by ferris at 7:12 AM on December 12, 2001

Just about any military installation has the fun "Use of Deadly Force Authorized" signs on exterior fences. At last any of the fences I've ever crossed has had one. Oops, I've said too much.

While I don't think the sign means "Cross the fence and we kill you," I think it's more along the lines of "Cross the fence and we _can_ kill you." Of course, this only applies if you get caught...
posted by campy at 11:20 AM on December 12, 2001