It's This or Get A Real Job
June 24, 2014 1:53 PM Subscribe
It's This or Get a Real Job is the subtitle to Greg Fallis' blog in which the former military medic, private detective, counselor in the Psychiatric/Security unit of a prison for women, professor at The American University in Washington, D.C. and at Fordham University in New York City, writer and photographer, offers his opinions on a variety of topics, such as mistakes, "After the disastrous Charge of the Light Brigade, Field Marshal FitzRoy James Henry Somerset, 1st Baron Raglan (GCB, PC) acknowledged his error and said, “Well, let’s not do that again.” And he never ordered another cavalry charge against a redoubt with a battery of fifty cannons. That wasn’t Lord Raglan’s first mistake; he also had an arm shot to pieces at the Battle of Waterloo. But as his arm was being amputated, Raglan told the surgeon, “My bad, learned my lesson, sorry to be a bother.” And he never had another arm amputated for the rest of his life. Lesson learned."
OK, I RTFA, I'm running on empty here.
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 2:02 PM on June 24, 2014 [3 favorites]
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 2:02 PM on June 24, 2014 [3 favorites]
Spoiler: he has a certain amount of dislike for Dick Cheney.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 2:19 PM on June 24, 2014 [3 favorites]
posted by Kirth Gerson at 2:19 PM on June 24, 2014 [3 favorites]
he has a certain amount of dislike for Dick Cheney.
They should just replace the Voight-Kampff test with that right there. Save everyone a lot of time and effort.
posted by backseatpilot at 2:22 PM on June 24, 2014 [14 favorites]
They should just replace the Voight-Kampff test with that right there. Save everyone a lot of time and effort.
posted by backseatpilot at 2:22 PM on June 24, 2014 [14 favorites]
This is my new favorite blog.
posted by NedKoppel at 2:23 PM on June 24, 2014 [3 favorites]
posted by NedKoppel at 2:23 PM on June 24, 2014 [3 favorites]
It's only a flesh wound.
posted by srboisvert at 2:31 PM on June 24, 2014
posted by srboisvert at 2:31 PM on June 24, 2014
Yeah, this took a turn in a direction I wasn't expecting.
posted by Barry B. Palindromer at 2:37 PM on June 24, 2014
posted by Barry B. Palindromer at 2:37 PM on June 24, 2014
"Editorial note: Above quotes may not be entirely historically accurate."
In my pocket universe they are.
posted by morganw at 2:43 PM on June 24, 2014 [1 favorite]
In my pocket universe they are.
posted by morganw at 2:43 PM on June 24, 2014 [1 favorite]
he has a certain amount of dislike for Dick Cheney.
but is it a mistake if billions of lost dollars and hundreds of thousands of lost lives personally makes you richer?
posted by philip-random at 2:45 PM on June 24, 2014 [1 favorite]
it apparently wasn't even a mistake when he shot a guy in the face, it was the other guy's fault.
posted by Hoopo at 2:55 PM on June 24, 2014 [5 favorites]
posted by Hoopo at 2:55 PM on June 24, 2014 [5 favorites]
I really can't adequately express my admiration for that post.
To the extent that there is such a thing as blog brilliance, that's an example of it right there.
posted by Fists O'Fury at 2:59 PM on June 24, 2014 [2 favorites]
To the extent that there is such a thing as blog brilliance, that's an example of it right there.
posted by Fists O'Fury at 2:59 PM on June 24, 2014 [2 favorites]
They should just replace the Voight-Kampff test with that right there. Save everyone a lot of time and effort.
"You’re in a desert walking along in the sand when all of the sudden you look down, and you see Dick Cheney, crawling toward you. You reach down, you flip him over on its back. Dick Cheney lays on his back, his belly baking in the hot sun, beating his legs trying to turn himself over, but he can’t, not without your help. But you’re not helping. Why is that?"
"Because fuck him."
"Okay, he's a person."
posted by Pope Guilty at 3:10 PM on June 24, 2014 [38 favorites]
"You’re in a desert walking along in the sand when all of the sudden you look down, and you see Dick Cheney, crawling toward you. You reach down, you flip him over on its back. Dick Cheney lays on his back, his belly baking in the hot sun, beating his legs trying to turn himself over, but he can’t, not without your help. But you’re not helping. Why is that?"
"Because fuck him."
"Okay, he's a person."
posted by Pope Guilty at 3:10 PM on June 24, 2014 [38 favorites]
Glad to discover that blog. I'll also point out that Fallis is willing to read FreeRepublic so you don't have to. That entry introduced me to the term Y'all Qaeda, which I intend to use as much as I can from this moment on.
posted by TedW at 3:19 PM on June 24, 2014 [4 favorites]
posted by TedW at 3:19 PM on June 24, 2014 [4 favorites]
it apparently wasn't even a mistake when he shot a guy in the face, it was the other guy's fault.
I'm no fan, but he appears to have been in the right there.
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 3:21 PM on June 24, 2014
I'm no fan, but he appears to have been in the right there.
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 3:21 PM on June 24, 2014
He is in the right if you ignore the part of gun safety that says always know what is in your line of fire before discharge.
posted by absalom at 3:35 PM on June 24, 2014 [12 favorites]
posted by absalom at 3:35 PM on June 24, 2014 [12 favorites]
correct me if I'm wrong but in America, whoever gets shot by a privately owned gun is always in the wrong. Anything else is unconstitutional.
posted by philip-random at 4:18 PM on June 24, 2014 [6 favorites]
posted by philip-random at 4:18 PM on June 24, 2014 [6 favorites]
I like this guy. He's like part Jim Wright, part Charlie Pierce.
posted by ob1quixote at 4:20 PM on June 24, 2014
posted by ob1quixote at 4:20 PM on June 24, 2014
His photography entries are great too. This post about Vivian Maier is both informative and fascinating. As I don't really keep up with the world of photography, I'd never heard of Maier. Whatever controversy there may be about her work, I think her photographs of street scenes are utterly charming. I never buy coffee table books, but I might just buy this one.
posted by ob1quixote at 4:36 PM on June 24, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by ob1quixote at 4:36 PM on June 24, 2014 [1 favorite]
I really really like the piece on cane toads.
posted by maryr at 5:52 PM on June 24, 2014 [3 favorites]
posted by maryr at 5:52 PM on June 24, 2014 [3 favorites]
He's got enthusiasm, I'll give him that. And "Y'all Qaeda" is genius.
posted by wenestvedt at 8:29 PM on June 24, 2014
posted by wenestvedt at 8:29 PM on June 24, 2014
“I think we’ve all learned a valuable lesson here. Let’s not repeat this iceberg thing.” Unfortunately, Captain Smith drowned shortly thereafter, but I’m confident that had he survived, he’d have spent the rest of his career dodging icebergs like a ninja. Lesson learned."
posted by jenfullmoon at 9:08 PM on June 24, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by jenfullmoon at 9:08 PM on June 24, 2014 [1 favorite]
Experience is a great teacher. Unfortunately, it kills all its students. --Hector Berlioz
posted by synthesizer at 11:49 PM on June 24, 2014 [1 favorite]
posted by synthesizer at 11:49 PM on June 24, 2014 [1 favorite]
The organizer of Operation American Spring, Colonel Harry Riley (Commander, Planet Skaro Expeditionary Force, Ret.), had predicted thirty million people would show up in the District of Constipation today. That’s a lot of people. All of whom are totally dedicated toBeautiful.kicking the Bamz’s black assrestoring decency and honor to Our Government of These United States.
posted by Halloween Jack at 5:28 AM on June 25, 2014 [1 favorite]
I like this guy. He's like part Jim Wright, part Charlie Pierce.
I immediately thought of Charlie Pierce as well.
posted by TedW at 6:22 AM on June 25, 2014 [1 favorite]
This is beautiful!
I guess some of us need to accept that hating Cheney after all these years is immature. But you know, all the dead people, they still seem to be dead. The US debt is still troubling the whole world (even China), and no countries have recovered from the crash, anywhere (except Norway, and they don't count).
posted by mumimor at 11:39 AM on June 25, 2014
I guess some of us need to accept that hating Cheney after all these years is immature. But you know, all the dead people, they still seem to be dead. The US debt is still troubling the whole world (even China), and no countries have recovered from the crash, anywhere (except Norway, and they don't count).
posted by mumimor at 11:39 AM on June 25, 2014
I guess some of us need to accept that hating Cheney after all these years is immature.
Noooooooooooooooooooooooope.
posted by Pope Guilty at 11:46 AM on June 25, 2014 [2 favorites]
Noooooooooooooooooooooooope.
posted by Pope Guilty at 11:46 AM on June 25, 2014 [2 favorites]
But you know, all the dead people, they still seem to be dead. The US debt is still troubling the whole world (even China), and no countries have recovered from the crash,....
Also, the evil bastard is still trying to sell us that shit sandwich.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 12:43 PM on June 25, 2014
Also, the evil bastard is still trying to sell us that shit sandwich.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 12:43 PM on June 25, 2014
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posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 2:00 PM on June 24, 2014 [1 favorite]