February 20, 2002
2:47 AM   Subscribe

waferbaby's new teen log generator produces random paragraphs each time you reload, like: "life is so unfair :/ i need a new host. rofl! haha i wish i got an anti-bloggie, and i'm bitter. i am so not a slut and i'm annoyed. so not going to happen! i wish i was britney." (Buy yourself a webcam, hire a youthful stripper to spend some time in front of it and you may be on your way to getting everything on your Amazon wishlist.)
posted by lia (20 comments total)
ehehe and whatever you reckon bitch. that waferbaby site is so shit and like that was like, the worst thing i ever saw. i want to have jason's babies, and i totally want to do him right now.

i am so in love with that guy ;) i feel like i'm floating. i am not as stupid as i sound :/ i want to have jason's babies. i totally got my rocks off :) i totally have a crush on derek powazek. i need a new host! we smoked so much pot. i was crying for hours ;) i'm bored.

it was so so cool ;) does my new design look ok? heh. i think not, lady and my icq isn't working. we love you evhead. jemma was hanging out with my brother before.

Wow, jason's babies! An in-the-know generator, of all things. Thanks, lia!
posted by MiguelCardoso at 3:56 AM on February 20, 2002

SomethingAwful had a great E/N generator a while ago, it would randomly generate an entire page-worth of "E/N goodness", like "Trent Reznor rules. God is dead. I hate my parents. I feel so drunk after downing this whole bottle of spiked-seltzer, har har".

Still, a killer link.
posted by Dark Messiah at 4:46 AM on February 20, 2002

Waferbaby's generating everything lately.. Seen the Spam generator with the catchy tagline: “Why fill your inbox with crap when you can make it yourself?” ? Cute...
posted by dabitch at 5:06 AM on February 20, 2002

i'm not a virgin :) i woke up feeling really sick. it was so so cool ;) i hate school. lol and britney's music really speaks to me. i totally got my rocks off, and i am so depressed. if you love me you'll comment and like ok, so i lied.

The bad thing is that I know girls who talk like this. If they wanna get the teenage male-speak, though, that generator's gonna need a lot more cussing...
posted by JaxJaggywires at 7:12 AM on February 20, 2002

All I got to say is...

That's so going in my LJ. Totally.
posted by sigma7 at 7:51 AM on February 20, 2002

Being sick sucks. Oh my god, it looks like all my e-pals are sick! How weird!
posted by internetgeniuses at 7:59 AM on February 20, 2002

I have never meet anyone that talks that way, and hope I never do.
posted by bjgeiger at 9:20 AM on February 20, 2002

"...i totally hate nickd :p i got hit on by some dude on aim..."

Yeah, that sounds about accurate.
posted by nickd at 9:57 AM on February 20, 2002

Seems to keep generating the same crap over and over...OH, wait a minute...that's the point!

posted by HTuttle at 10:33 AM on February 20, 2002

Ugh. Three spins of that, and I'm already claustrophobic.
posted by Down10 at 11:16 AM on February 20, 2002

Well, since teenagers are bound and determined to declare their individuality in the same way that every other teenager, this doubly apropos.

Remeber, AOL didn't invent "me too", it just made it easier.
posted by tommasz at 11:28 AM on February 20, 2002

we totally did it in my car but i totally love mister rogers. i totally lust after that guy!

And here I thought I was the only one who wondered what Mr. Rogers was like in the sack.

Go figure.

posted by ebarker at 11:57 AM on February 20, 2002

crap. my weblog is almost exactly like this, except i use a thesaurus for bigger words.

so rocking. so very, very rocking... yeah.
posted by lotsofno at 12:57 PM on February 20, 2002

its the spam generator, but with angst.
posted by quonsar at 4:06 PM on February 20, 2002

I think he's on to us...

...and yes, that's me in the comments. Ya gotta love those circular comment posts.
posted by pheideaux at 4:54 PM on February 20, 2002

I'd like to hear from some teenage posters as to whether they feel that this represents their demographic enough to be a good parody. I'm 31, but I remember when I was in high school, there were very few adults who could even understand the ideas behind teenage slang and pop references, let alone parody them.

Britney is a big star, but I doubt she's quite the blindly worhsipped goddess that many cynical adults make her out to be. She's just the crest of the wave, the face of the American teen world most visible to adults. Besides, come on...she is a plastic product, and she might have been created for teenagers, but she wasn't created BY them. I think that older people like to reduce kids to stereotypes, because it's easier than dealing with the idea that there is a sophisticated generation growing up under our noses, with their own idioms and references, just like we had.
posted by bingo at 5:12 PM on February 20, 2002

I prefer humor in my text generators. They fight crime!
posted by JParker at 11:04 PM on February 20, 2002

My sister, aged 14 has just redesigned her page based solely around this thread. She think's it's like, totally funny, like.
posted by nedrichards at 1:11 AM on February 21, 2002

The stuff there reminds me of the old Camper Van Beethoven song "Club Med Sucks/Opie Rides Again" that took the piss out of hardcore. "Club Med sucks! Authority sucks! I hate golf! I don't want to play lacrosse!"
posted by geneablogy at 10:11 PM on February 21, 2002

And because shes an unpredictable 14 year old shes just redesigned it again. Based around Hello Kitty. Because that's like, *so* totally japanese.
posted by nedrichards at 7:41 AM on March 20, 2002

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