David Avocado Wolfe Is The Biggest Asshole In The Multiverse
March 20, 2018 9:49 AM Subscribe
With more than 11 million followers on Facebook, David “Avocado” Wolfe, the Sideshow Bob-haired, blender-hawking alternative-health guru, calls himself the “Rock Star and Indiana Jones of the superfood universe.” And he's humble. You’ve undoubtedly seen one of his bullshit-filled posts or inspirational memes shared into your feed, but who — or more accurately, what — is David Avocado Wolfe?
Orac: How is it that I’ve never heard of David Avocado Wolfe before?
The Unapologists:
Don’t Cry Wolfe: New Age Con-Artistry And Anti-Intellectualism
Beyond The Woo – Why David Wolfe & Co. Are Detrimental To Society
Bad Science Debunked on Wolfe
RationalWiki on Wolfe
#DontCryWolfe on Twitter
Orac: How is it that I’ve never heard of David Avocado Wolfe before?
The Unapologists:
Don’t Cry Wolfe: New Age Con-Artistry And Anti-Intellectualism
Beyond The Woo – Why David Wolfe & Co. Are Detrimental To Society
Bad Science Debunked on Wolfe
RationalWiki on Wolfe
#DontCryWolfe on Twitter
I don't tend to read articles debunking woo b/c woo is not my thing and debunking isn't really either. But reading the second linked article was totally worth it b/c a comment underneath it included the phrase "crossed the Woobicon."
And that's just so great. Just SO great. I treasure it. I will try to work it into conversation today.
posted by feckless at 9:56 AM on March 20, 2018 [71 favorites]
And that's just so great. Just SO great. I treasure it. I will try to work it into conversation today.
posted by feckless at 9:56 AM on March 20, 2018 [71 favorites]
I have read a debunk on that chappie before. I remember his hair. And his woo.
posted by Samizdata at 9:58 AM on March 20, 2018
posted by Samizdata at 9:58 AM on March 20, 2018
"crossed the Woobicon" LOOOOOOL that's a keeper!
posted by supermedusa at 10:01 AM on March 20, 2018 [9 favorites]
posted by supermedusa at 10:01 AM on March 20, 2018 [9 favorites]
my local grocery co-op gave us a magazine with this chucklefuck on the cover when we bought in. I'd never heard of him but holy shit the interview with him was batshit. the co-op recently did a member survey and I told them I'd appreciate it if they minimized the amount of garbage and woo they tried to sell (there were questions on there about how much we trust traditional medicine, which...woo boy. I really do like the place and like shopping there, but there is a certain amount of David Avocado Wolfe-yness to the whole thing.)
posted by dismas at 10:05 AM on March 20, 2018 [6 favorites]
posted by dismas at 10:05 AM on March 20, 2018 [6 favorites]
I learned I have a few Facebook friends who follow him. One of them, I'm pretty certain, is a "keep your enemies closer" sort of thing and a couple are, I hope in the same spirit in which I kept revisiting the Time Cube website.
posted by Foosnark at 10:10 AM on March 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by Foosnark at 10:10 AM on March 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
David Avocado Wolfe Is The Biggest Asshole In The Multiverse
Giant asshole? Sure. But "biggest"? Nonsense. He's hitting 2.5, maybe 3.0 millishkrelis, max.
posted by gurple at 10:14 AM on March 20, 2018 [42 favorites]
Giant asshole? Sure. But "biggest"? Nonsense. He's hitting 2.5, maybe 3.0 millishkrelis, max.
posted by gurple at 10:14 AM on March 20, 2018 [42 favorites]
> gurple:
Giant asshole? Sure. But "biggest"? Nonsense. He's hitting 2.5, maybe 3.0 millishkrelis, max."
Nope. He goes up to at least 6 to 7 millishkrelis for him comparing himself to Indiana Jones.
posted by Samizdata at 10:16 AM on March 20, 2018 [5 favorites]
Giant asshole? Sure. But "biggest"? Nonsense. He's hitting 2.5, maybe 3.0 millishkrelis, max."
Nope. He goes up to at least 6 to 7 millishkrelis for him comparing himself to Indiana Jones.
posted by Samizdata at 10:16 AM on March 20, 2018 [5 favorites]
And the antidote: Daniel Guacamole Fox. [FB] You're welcome.
posted by Halloween Jack at 10:18 AM on March 20, 2018 [17 favorites]
posted by Halloween Jack at 10:18 AM on March 20, 2018 [17 favorites]
Also seen on 2004's reality tv shitshow Mad Mad House.
posted by joedan at 10:19 AM on March 20, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by joedan at 10:19 AM on March 20, 2018 [1 favorite]
I don't know who he is, and from what I've read so far, I don't care what he is either.
posted by Chuffy at 10:30 AM on March 20, 2018 [4 favorites]
posted by Chuffy at 10:30 AM on March 20, 2018 [4 favorites]
"who — or more accurately, what — is David Avocado Wolfe?"
His OWN THANG.
I mean, I just want a David S Pumpkins skit, 30 seconds of him getting asked if he's related to David Avocado Wolfe and going "FUCK NO" and David S Pumpkins being horrified.
posted by FritoKAL at 10:36 AM on March 20, 2018 [17 favorites]
His OWN THANG.
I mean, I just want a David S Pumpkins skit, 30 seconds of him getting asked if he's related to David Avocado Wolfe and going "FUCK NO" and David S Pumpkins being horrified.
posted by FritoKAL at 10:36 AM on March 20, 2018 [17 favorites]
from the rationalwiki link ...
Wolfe believes himself to be "the rock star and Indiana Jones of the superfoods and longevity universe."[6] but in reality he's a snake oil salesman.[7]
in every reality I've ever known, anyone who calls themselves the rock star and Indiana Jones of anything is selling snake oil. Just sayin ...
posted by philip-random at 10:45 AM on March 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
Wolfe believes himself to be "the rock star and Indiana Jones of the superfoods and longevity universe."[6] but in reality he's a snake oil salesman.[7]
in every reality I've ever known, anyone who calls themselves the rock star and Indiana Jones of anything is selling snake oil. Just sayin ...
posted by philip-random at 10:45 AM on March 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
He doesn't have Sideshow Bob hair. He has Leonard from Big Bang Theory hair. And this is all madness.
posted by The_Vegetables at 11:06 AM on March 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by The_Vegetables at 11:06 AM on March 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
I know Counting Crows haven't had a hit in a long time, but I didn't think Adam Duritz would have to sink this low.
I really do wonder, though, when I read about these guys, whether they actually believe all of the not-even-plausible nonsense (gravity is a lie?!) or if it's some kind of psyop to soften up the marks for the maybe-plausible-if-you're-credulous sales pitches.
posted by uncleozzy at 11:12 AM on March 20, 2018 [4 favorites]
I really do wonder, though, when I read about these guys, whether they actually believe all of the not-even-plausible nonsense (gravity is a lie?!) or if it's some kind of psyop to soften up the marks for the maybe-plausible-if-you're-credulous sales pitches.
posted by uncleozzy at 11:12 AM on March 20, 2018 [4 favorites]
"Snake oil... Why did it have to be snake oil?"
posted by jeff-o-matic at 11:15 AM on March 20, 2018 [53 favorites]
posted by jeff-o-matic at 11:15 AM on March 20, 2018 [53 favorites]
Gaaaaaah, David Avocado Wolfe. A friend on Facebook posted a video that his page shared. It was so bad.
It began by informing the viewer that "The eagle has the longest life-span of its species." Which, it's like, okay, like the specific individual eagle you are showing is a member of a species of eagles, and either the person who made this video doesn't understand what an eagle is or what a species is or doesn't understand both; not sure how this video could get worse, but let's go for it.
The viewer then learns that, in order to reach the very old age of 70, the eagle faces a difficult decision.
"In its 40th year, the eagle's long and flexible talons can no longer grab a prey which serves as its food." Okay, I mean, "a prey which serves as food" seems redundant, and it seems incredible that the eagle would evolve long, rubbery, worthless talons, but okay.
The video goes on to assert that the eagle's long, sharp beak becomes bent, and its thick feathers cause its wings to become heavy and stick to its chest.
So, the eagle can just sit there and die like a total bozo, or it can go through a painful process of change.
The eagle flies to a mountain top to "sit on its nest" (cool, sounds bird-like and plausible) and then it bashes its beak against a rock to remove it. Then when the beak grows back, whoopsie-daisy, he plucks out his worthless old talons! Then, when the talons grow back, the eagle plucks out all its old feathers! Then the feathers grow back! And then the eagle takes its "famous flight of rebirth" (you know, the famous eagle flight? the one you heard about?) and it lives for 30 more years.
If the eagle can make this difficult decision, why can't we?
It may astound you, but none of this true. No, as plausible as it seems, and as trustworthy a source as David Avocado Wolfe is, the eagle does not remove all its feathers and talons and smash its beak off on a rock on a mountain.
So, how are we to explain the meaning of this amazing fake story? David Wolfe helpfully provides an answer in his video description. "*Note: This is an allegory"
posted by compartment at 11:15 AM on March 20, 2018 [68 favorites]
It began by informing the viewer that "The eagle has the longest life-span of its species." Which, it's like, okay, like the specific individual eagle you are showing is a member of a species of eagles, and either the person who made this video doesn't understand what an eagle is or what a species is or doesn't understand both; not sure how this video could get worse, but let's go for it.
The viewer then learns that, in order to reach the very old age of 70, the eagle faces a difficult decision.
"In its 40th year, the eagle's long and flexible talons can no longer grab a prey which serves as its food." Okay, I mean, "a prey which serves as food" seems redundant, and it seems incredible that the eagle would evolve long, rubbery, worthless talons, but okay.
The video goes on to assert that the eagle's long, sharp beak becomes bent, and its thick feathers cause its wings to become heavy and stick to its chest.
So, the eagle can just sit there and die like a total bozo, or it can go through a painful process of change.
The eagle flies to a mountain top to "sit on its nest" (cool, sounds bird-like and plausible) and then it bashes its beak against a rock to remove it. Then when the beak grows back, whoopsie-daisy, he plucks out his worthless old talons! Then, when the talons grow back, the eagle plucks out all its old feathers! Then the feathers grow back! And then the eagle takes its "famous flight of rebirth" (you know, the famous eagle flight? the one you heard about?) and it lives for 30 more years.
If the eagle can make this difficult decision, why can't we?
It may astound you, but none of this true. No, as plausible as it seems, and as trustworthy a source as David Avocado Wolfe is, the eagle does not remove all its feathers and talons and smash its beak off on a rock on a mountain.
So, how are we to explain the meaning of this amazing fake story? David Wolfe helpfully provides an answer in his video description. "*Note: This is an allegory"
posted by compartment at 11:15 AM on March 20, 2018 [68 favorites]
Is there a philosophical distinction between referring to the man as "Anthony Robbins" vs. "Tony Robbins?"
posted by rhizome at 11:15 AM on March 20, 2018
posted by rhizome at 11:15 AM on March 20, 2018
The eagle flies to a mountain top to "sit on its nest" (cool, sounds bird-like and plausible) and then it bashes its beak against a rock to remove it. Then when the beak grows back, whoopsie-daisy, he plucks out his worthless old talons! Then, when the talons grow back, the eagle plucks out all its old feathers! Then the feathers grow back! And then the eagle takes its "famous flight of rebirth" (you know, the famous eagle flight? the one you heard about?) and it lives for 30 more years.
And of course the point of that story is to find people who are a) dumb; and b) open to the idea of tearing oneself down and rebuilding anew, which, eventually, surely involves buying tickets to David's $5000 seminar or something like that. Point being, find dumb people who will forsake everything they've become until now.
posted by rhizome at 11:19 AM on March 20, 2018 [7 favorites]
And of course the point of that story is to find people who are a) dumb; and b) open to the idea of tearing oneself down and rebuilding anew, which, eventually, surely involves buying tickets to David's $5000 seminar or something like that. Point being, find dumb people who will forsake everything they've become until now.
posted by rhizome at 11:19 AM on March 20, 2018 [7 favorites]
I really do wonder, though, when I read about these guys, whether they actually believe all of the not-even-plausible nonsense (
I did a quick Youtube search and the first clip that came up (concerning The Flat Earth) has him saying, "I definitely believe the world we're living in has been mis-described."
To which, I say, yeah, I suspect the entire planet can agree with that, at least in part. But then the bullshit quickly starts spinning. Which is really what this is. As I recall my uncle pointing out to me many years ago. "Lying is when you say something that you know isn't true. Bullshit spinning is saying stuff that you have no idea whether it's true or not, it's in service of something else, which is usually selling people stuff they don't need." My Uncle was a salesman.
posted by philip-random at 11:20 AM on March 20, 2018 [5 favorites]
I did a quick Youtube search and the first clip that came up (concerning The Flat Earth) has him saying, "I definitely believe the world we're living in has been mis-described."
To which, I say, yeah, I suspect the entire planet can agree with that, at least in part. But then the bullshit quickly starts spinning. Which is really what this is. As I recall my uncle pointing out to me many years ago. "Lying is when you say something that you know isn't true. Bullshit spinning is saying stuff that you have no idea whether it's true or not, it's in service of something else, which is usually selling people stuff they don't need." My Uncle was a salesman.
posted by philip-random at 11:20 AM on March 20, 2018 [5 favorites]
If rebirth is about smashing your face, then my head-desking here is gonna make me immortal.
posted by zippy at 11:23 AM on March 20, 2018 [12 favorites]
posted by zippy at 11:23 AM on March 20, 2018 [12 favorites]
Your uncle was quoting Harry Frankfurt.
posted by praemunire at 11:27 AM on March 20, 2018 [10 favorites]
posted by praemunire at 11:27 AM on March 20, 2018 [10 favorites]
Anyone else know this guy as a recurring joke on Do By Friday?
posted by SansPoint at 11:33 AM on March 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by SansPoint at 11:33 AM on March 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
I'm glad I'm not the only person who was reminded of David S. Pumpkins, although David S. Pumpkins seems like a much more authentic and benign person than this guy.
I mean, David S. Pumpkins just wants people to know how great Halloween is. That's practically a public service!
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 11:37 AM on March 20, 2018 [4 favorites]
I mean, David S. Pumpkins just wants people to know how great Halloween is. That's practically a public service!
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 11:37 AM on March 20, 2018 [4 favorites]
Your uncle was quoting Harry Frankfurt.
I’ve never understood why this gets trotted out, especially when Trump (or any salesman) is mentioned. Lies are lies. If you don’t know they’re lies, it still makes you a liar. If you’re lying to sell something, that doesn’t make the lies you use when selling yourself, or defending yourself, which is the same thing, any different. This “bullshit is different from lying” thing bugs me to no end. Speaking an untruth is a lie, no matter the desired end result. It’s the cherry soda lie vs. the rootbeer lie. None of it is the truth, so why make these clever excuses for how different lies have different flavors and intents? It’s a way to defend lies is all I can see.
posted by valkane at 11:42 AM on March 20, 2018 [1 favorite]
I’ve never understood why this gets trotted out, especially when Trump (or any salesman) is mentioned. Lies are lies. If you don’t know they’re lies, it still makes you a liar. If you’re lying to sell something, that doesn’t make the lies you use when selling yourself, or defending yourself, which is the same thing, any different. This “bullshit is different from lying” thing bugs me to no end. Speaking an untruth is a lie, no matter the desired end result. It’s the cherry soda lie vs. the rootbeer lie. None of it is the truth, so why make these clever excuses for how different lies have different flavors and intents? It’s a way to defend lies is all I can see.
posted by valkane at 11:42 AM on March 20, 2018 [1 favorite]
Oh, and no offense intended, preamunire, you called it exactly, and went to the source. My comment was no reflection upon you. Honest!
posted by valkane at 11:45 AM on March 20, 2018
posted by valkane at 11:45 AM on March 20, 2018
Reishi mushrooms... My roommate has a thing for Reishi mushroom powder in hot water or whatever it is that do. It leaves a funky brown residue in cups. And this person goes for all the woo stuff like this. And still has a chronic illness.
posted by jeff-o-matic at 11:56 AM on March 20, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by jeff-o-matic at 11:56 AM on March 20, 2018 [1 favorite]
This “bullshit is different from lying” thing bugs me to no end. Speaking an untruth is a lie, no matter the desired end result.
I wasn't intending to make excuse with my previous comment, just offer some perspective from inside "the bullshit". I do think if you hope to annihilate a particular disease, you need to understand where it comes from.
You mention Trump, a very good example. I don't think he's some Illuminati operative working The Big Lie, serving the military-industrial agenda of evil grey men in underground bunkers. He's just another bullshit artist, as American as bad apple pie, a fixed baseball game, hotdogs so full of bi-products who knows what they really are. He's David Avocado Wolfe with a richer dad and, I suppose, a bigger, more flattering mirror.
posted by philip-random at 11:56 AM on March 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
I wasn't intending to make excuse with my previous comment, just offer some perspective from inside "the bullshit". I do think if you hope to annihilate a particular disease, you need to understand where it comes from.
You mention Trump, a very good example. I don't think he's some Illuminati operative working The Big Lie, serving the military-industrial agenda of evil grey men in underground bunkers. He's just another bullshit artist, as American as bad apple pie, a fixed baseball game, hotdogs so full of bi-products who knows what they really are. He's David Avocado Wolfe with a richer dad and, I suppose, a bigger, more flattering mirror.
posted by philip-random at 11:56 AM on March 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
As American as a botched execution.
posted by jeff-o-matic at 11:58 AM on March 20, 2018 [9 favorites]
posted by jeff-o-matic at 11:58 AM on March 20, 2018 [9 favorites]
Is there a philosophical distinction between referring to the man as "Anthony Robbins" vs. "Tony Robbins?"
No more than between David "Avocado" Wolfe and David "Testicle" Wolfe.
posted by ricochet biscuit at 12:17 PM on March 20, 2018 [1 favorite]
No more than between David "Avocado" Wolfe and David "Testicle" Wolfe.
posted by ricochet biscuit at 12:17 PM on March 20, 2018 [1 favorite]
Well thank you Metafilter for ruining my afternoon. I went do the rabbit hole. And now I know all about the University of Integrated Sciences in California where I can take courses like this which promises eight days of bliss and vegan food. Or, I can become a Tachyon pain technician once I take the course and buy the Tachyon TLC bars. Can't afford the Tachyon bars? Don't worry, you can any crystal Tachyonized here! How do they do that?
This tachyon chamber is designed by Pleiadeans and it is run by trusted earth based scientists. The details are proprietary.
This rabbit hole is deep.
posted by misterpatrick at 12:32 PM on March 20, 2018 [6 favorites]
This tachyon chamber is designed by Pleiadeans and it is run by trusted earth based scientists. The details are proprietary.
This rabbit hole is deep.
posted by misterpatrick at 12:32 PM on March 20, 2018 [6 favorites]
I haven't looked at all the links, but this video really tells you all you need to know about this dude.
posted by Joakim Ziegler at 12:45 PM on March 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by Joakim Ziegler at 12:45 PM on March 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
Watching dude's video on flat eartherism he reminds me very, very strongly of an ex-friend of mine who was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and has been developing paranoia and delusions. Last I heard he fancied himself an expert on quantum physics and mind tuning with lights and magnets. Made videos a lot like this guy. It makes me sad.
posted by grumpybear69 at 12:49 PM on March 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by grumpybear69 at 12:49 PM on March 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
On the one hand, you listen to the Adam Ruins Everything Placebo podcast with Dr Kathryn Hall, and learn that the placebo effect could not only explain some of the power of homeopatics, but regular medicines too.
On the other, you read that the Nigerian scammers are actually not as stupid as their emails may suggest, but actually structure the bait emails so that anyone even marginally not gullible is immediately put off by them - thereby greatly reducing the number of responses only to those most likely to bite.
And you can't help but thinking that if this Avocado guy "Wolfe is clearly a very intelligent person", he not only structures his message intentionally so that it is ONLY attractive to the most susceptible of us, but that his quackery might actually, in some cases, due to the extended and as yet not fully researched placebo effect, work.
posted by Laotic at 12:52 PM on March 20, 2018 [8 favorites]
On the other, you read that the Nigerian scammers are actually not as stupid as their emails may suggest, but actually structure the bait emails so that anyone even marginally not gullible is immediately put off by them - thereby greatly reducing the number of responses only to those most likely to bite.
And you can't help but thinking that if this Avocado guy "Wolfe is clearly a very intelligent person", he not only structures his message intentionally so that it is ONLY attractive to the most susceptible of us, but that his quackery might actually, in some cases, due to the extended and as yet not fully researched placebo effect, work.
posted by Laotic at 12:52 PM on March 20, 2018 [8 favorites]
I have to admit, the Mr. Rogers rabbit hole I have been scrabbling at the edge of today helps me with things like this.
posted by Samizdata at 1:07 PM on March 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by Samizdata at 1:07 PM on March 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
Do you mean to tell me that chocolate is not an octave of sun energy?
posted by asnider at 1:13 PM on March 20, 2018 [14 favorites]
posted by asnider at 1:13 PM on March 20, 2018 [14 favorites]
No, it's on the same octave as a smile, or gold.
posted by Laotic at 1:16 PM on March 20, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by Laotic at 1:16 PM on March 20, 2018 [1 favorite]
his quackery might actually, in some cases, due to the extended and as yet not fully researched placebo effect, work.
I don't think it even reaches that level of specificity, he's just leaving enough space in his logic to make room for his listeners' hopes and paranoia. "Never tell a girl why she shouldn't fuck you."
posted by rhizome at 1:16 PM on March 20, 2018
I don't think it even reaches that level of specificity, he's just leaving enough space in his logic to make room for his listeners' hopes and paranoia. "Never tell a girl why she shouldn't fuck you."
posted by rhizome at 1:16 PM on March 20, 2018
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posted by Johnny Wallflower at 1:28 PM on March 20, 2018 [17 favorites]
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 1:28 PM on March 20, 2018 [17 favorites]
Well, that’s a surprising thing to learn about some people I thought had a whisker of common sense.
posted by andraste at 1:40 PM on March 20, 2018 [11 favorites]
posted by andraste at 1:40 PM on March 20, 2018 [11 favorites]
Thank god that comes up with zero friends. But then again, I’m a misanthrope and have zero friends.
posted by zippy at 1:53 PM on March 20, 2018 [6 favorites]
posted by zippy at 1:53 PM on March 20, 2018 [6 favorites]
So, how are we to explain the meaning of this amazing fake story? David Wolfe helpfully provides an answer in his video description. "*Note: This is an allegory"
I've got a great allegory; it's all about how David Random Vegetable Wolfe keeps getting smacked in the face with proof of his bullshit, until the fleshy covering tears to reveal the lizard alien beneath. Then he swallows a hamster whole, belches, smiles, and chirps, "Organic!"
posted by Halloween Jack at 2:23 PM on March 20, 2018 [1 favorite]
I've got a great allegory; it's all about how David Random Vegetable Wolfe keeps getting smacked in the face with proof of his bullshit, until the fleshy covering tears to reveal the lizard alien beneath. Then he swallows a hamster whole, belches, smiles, and chirps, "Organic!"
posted by Halloween Jack at 2:23 PM on March 20, 2018 [1 favorite]
Also, WRT J. Wallflower's link: Uh. Cousin-in-law who's always seemed sane. Will think about whether or not to have a word with him.
posted by Halloween Jack at 2:26 PM on March 20, 2018
posted by Halloween Jack at 2:26 PM on March 20, 2018
This “bullshit is different from lying” thing bugs me to no end. Speaking an untruth is a lie, no matter the desired end result.
My final semester elective on Media Literacy was taught by an anthropology professor who said that Carlos Castenada was 'a new type of anthropologist' when I asked why he was teaching the work of a known academic fraud. I got a D in his class and it cost me a shot at a 4 year $30,000 graduate school grant because it dropped my final year average half a percentage below an A.
Woo has real world effects and they are all bad as far as I am concerned.
posted by srboisvert at 2:35 PM on March 20, 2018 [20 favorites]
My final semester elective on Media Literacy was taught by an anthropology professor who said that Carlos Castenada was 'a new type of anthropologist' when I asked why he was teaching the work of a known academic fraud. I got a D in his class and it cost me a shot at a 4 year $30,000 graduate school grant because it dropped my final year average half a percentage below an A.
Woo has real world effects and they are all bad as far as I am concerned.
posted by srboisvert at 2:35 PM on March 20, 2018 [20 favorites]
It may astound you, but none of this true. No, as plausible as it seems, and as trustworthy a source as David Avocado Wolfe is, the eagle does not remove all its feathers and talons and smash its beak off on a rock on a mountain.
So, how are we to explain the meaning of this amazing fake story? David Wolfe helpfully provides an answer in his video description. "*Note: This is an allegory"
Obviously, this tale being told is complete nonsense, empirically; there is no eagle that does this. But oh! it is, you see, an allegory. It is not to be taken literally! Oh, how silly we were to take a story told in the form of a factual account so literally. We have yet to achieve wisdom.
The thing is, the story is actually kind of worse as an explicit allegory; it is dangerous misinformation. What is the lesson here, really? That completely destroying your physical body will reverse aging or something? It's a dangerous lesson to promulgate: it depicts physical self-harm, self-destruction as potentially healthful, or even necessary for health, which is exactly the same kind of exceedingly primitive common sense that leads people to things like "detox" and that awful cabbage-and-salt slurry diarrhea scam. We've come a long way since we regularly just exsanguinated people for health purposes, but many forms of self-destruction in the pursuit of better health seem capable of catching the attention of people living in wealthy nations. We have to firmly reject this pernicious psychological pattern, which is no doubt bound up in a complex of beliefs about safety, purity, and pollution more generally, as cultural categories.
Or in other words: we should be vigilant and merciless towards charlatans who tell people that they're actually phoenixes so it's okay to set themselves on fire.
posted by clockzero at 2:40 PM on March 20, 2018 [6 favorites]
So, how are we to explain the meaning of this amazing fake story? David Wolfe helpfully provides an answer in his video description. "*Note: This is an allegory"
Obviously, this tale being told is complete nonsense, empirically; there is no eagle that does this. But oh! it is, you see, an allegory. It is not to be taken literally! Oh, how silly we were to take a story told in the form of a factual account so literally. We have yet to achieve wisdom.
The thing is, the story is actually kind of worse as an explicit allegory; it is dangerous misinformation. What is the lesson here, really? That completely destroying your physical body will reverse aging or something? It's a dangerous lesson to promulgate: it depicts physical self-harm, self-destruction as potentially healthful, or even necessary for health, which is exactly the same kind of exceedingly primitive common sense that leads people to things like "detox" and that awful cabbage-and-salt slurry diarrhea scam. We've come a long way since we regularly just exsanguinated people for health purposes, but many forms of self-destruction in the pursuit of better health seem capable of catching the attention of people living in wealthy nations. We have to firmly reject this pernicious psychological pattern, which is no doubt bound up in a complex of beliefs about safety, purity, and pollution more generally, as cultural categories.
Or in other words: we should be vigilant and merciless towards charlatans who tell people that they're actually phoenixes so it's okay to set themselves on fire.
posted by clockzero at 2:40 PM on March 20, 2018 [6 favorites]
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TWO! And one of them is a fine young woman...
posted by Laotic at 2:41 PM on March 20, 2018
TWO! And one of them is a fine young woman...
posted by Laotic at 2:41 PM on March 20, 2018
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hmmm, ten is way too many, but only three of whom I think of as actual friends, and one of them has ... issues, and another has been dead for over a year. And of the other seven, well, what can you say about artists? Including the guy in the white suit here.
posted by philip-random at 2:57 PM on March 20, 2018
hmmm, ten is way too many, but only three of whom I think of as actual friends, and one of them has ... issues, and another has been dead for over a year. And of the other seven, well, what can you say about artists? Including the guy in the white suit here.
posted by philip-random at 2:57 PM on March 20, 2018
Speaking an untruth is a lie, no matter the desired end result. It’s the cherry soda lie vs. the rootbeer lie.
The people making those distinctions are connoisseurs of lying. You apparently are not, which is to your credit.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 3:13 PM on March 20, 2018
The people making those distinctions are connoisseurs of lying. You apparently are not, which is to your credit.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 3:13 PM on March 20, 2018
> "Want a super-easy way to thin out your Facebook friends list? CLICK HERE"
Five ... and not all of them the ones I expected.
posted by kyrademon at 3:20 PM on March 20, 2018
Five ... and not all of them the ones I expected.
posted by kyrademon at 3:20 PM on March 20, 2018
We will contact you after purchase to arrange for your personal items to be Tachyonized and then returned to you after they have been infused with Tachyons by a company endorsed by Rob and Cobra.
Clearly a scam - if they were infusing with actual tachyons, they'd be contacting you before purchase.
posted by Dr Dracator at 3:32 PM on March 20, 2018 [9 favorites]
Clearly a scam - if they were infusing with actual tachyons, they'd be contacting you before purchase.
posted by Dr Dracator at 3:32 PM on March 20, 2018 [9 favorites]
Be kind to your friends, people sometimes favorite things like this when they're in pain or feeling lost and need hope.
(Confront charlatans, but be kind to people who may have fallen for them out of vulnerability)
posted by zippy at 3:34 PM on March 20, 2018 [20 favorites]
(Confront charlatans, but be kind to people who may have fallen for them out of vulnerability)
posted by zippy at 3:34 PM on March 20, 2018 [20 favorites]
Yeah, my sense is that Wolfe probably eased himself into this position and in the beginning was woo-adjacent more than whole-hog. That's my charitable take, based on the personalities of the friends who come up for me.
posted by rhizome at 3:41 PM on March 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by rhizome at 3:41 PM on March 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
Your uncle was quoting Harry Frankfurt.
thanks for that link, praemunire. From it (emphasis mine):
Both the liar and the bullshitter try to get away with something. But ‘lying’ is perceived to be a conscious act of deception, whereas ‘bullshitting’ is unconnected to a concern for truth. Frankfurt regards this ‘indifference to how things really are’, as the essence of bullshit. Furthermore, a lie is necessarily false, but bullshit is not – bullshit may happen to be correct or incorrect. The crux of the matter is that bullshitters hide their lack of commitment to truth. Since bullshitters ignore truth instead of acknowledging and subverting it, bullshit is a greater enemy of truth than lies.
Though in defense of my uncle, Frankfurt's book is copyright 2005. Uncle Tim would've espoused his "wisdom" to me about thirty years previous, though not as succinctly. My guess is it was common shoptalk in the sales world of way back when (roughly twenty-five years after Willie Loman died ... for the first time).
posted by philip-random at 4:18 PM on March 20, 2018 [3 favorites]
Another problem with woo-peddlers like this chucklehead is that folk medicine that actually works gets dismissed as woo. I use thyme for coughs and elderberry syrup during cold and flu season, and my family is super dismissive of it.
On the other hand, the people on my FB who like this dude are people who are also believe in folk medicine and have taken it too far without a critical eye.
posted by Ruki at 4:27 PM on March 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
On the other hand, the people on my FB who like this dude are people who are also believe in folk medicine and have taken it too far without a critical eye.
posted by Ruki at 4:27 PM on March 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
I'd forgotten about this guy since I told Facebook to hide all shared posts from him. Thanks metafiler!
posted by vespabelle at 4:28 PM on March 20, 2018 [3 favorites]
posted by vespabelle at 4:28 PM on March 20, 2018 [3 favorites]
It doesn't surprise me that much, because I hang out with a bunch of hippies, but I have to scroll for FAR too long to get through that "Friends who like" thing.
And the first person on the list is a nurse for fuck's sake.
posted by flaterik at 4:38 PM on March 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
And the first person on the list is a nurse for fuck's sake.
posted by flaterik at 4:38 PM on March 20, 2018 [2 favorites]
It doesn't tell you so I had to count manually.
The number is ninety four.
Including a few people who I know well enough to know they're better than that and well enough to tell them that.
posted by flaterik at 4:40 PM on March 20, 2018 [1 favorite]
The number is ninety four.
Including a few people who I know well enough to know they're better than that and well enough to tell them that.
posted by flaterik at 4:40 PM on March 20, 2018 [1 favorite]
Or, I can become a Tachyon pain technician once I take the course and buy the Tachyon TLC bars.
Tachyon pain technician sounds like some kind of facility upgrade from Alpha Centauri
posted by Vic Morrow's Personal Vietnam at 5:24 PM on March 20, 2018 [5 favorites]
Tachyon pain technician sounds like some kind of facility upgrade from Alpha Centauri
posted by Vic Morrow's Personal Vietnam at 5:24 PM on March 20, 2018 [5 favorites]
Help at least ten of my facebook friends "like" this asshole and two of those are my mom and my MIL.
siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh.
posted by offalark at 6:09 PM on March 20, 2018
siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh.
posted by offalark at 6:09 PM on March 20, 2018
> David Avocado Wolfe
I can't read this name without thinking he's some famous assassin in another universe.
Mark David Chapman, John Wilkes Booth, Lee Harvey Oswald, James Earl Ray, John David Stutts, David Avocado Wolfe.
posted by rokusan at 6:11 PM on March 20, 2018 [9 favorites]
I can't read this name without thinking he's some famous assassin in another universe.
Mark David Chapman, John Wilkes Booth, Lee Harvey Oswald, James Earl Ray, John David Stutts, David Avocado Wolfe.
posted by rokusan at 6:11 PM on March 20, 2018 [9 favorites]
Tachyon pain technician sounds like some kind of facility upgrade from Alpha Centauri
Early draft of an El-P song.
posted by atoxyl at 6:19 PM on March 20, 2018 [1 favorite]
Early draft of an El-P song.
posted by atoxyl at 6:19 PM on March 20, 2018 [1 favorite]
MetaFilter: Thanks metafiler!
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 7:24 PM on March 20, 2018 [3 favorites]
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 7:24 PM on March 20, 2018 [3 favorites]
> Johnny Wallflower:
"Want a super-easy way to thin out your Facebook friends list? CLICK HERE"
Well, prepare the domestic waterfowl lubricant! (My polite way of saying "fuck a duck!") Seven people. It is ALWAYS wonderful having proof the ex you claim is crazy is, indeed, crazy,
posted by Samizdata at 7:37 PM on March 20, 2018
"Want a super-easy way to thin out your Facebook friends list? CLICK HERE"
Well, prepare the domestic waterfowl lubricant! (My polite way of saying "fuck a duck!") Seven people. It is ALWAYS wonderful having proof the ex you claim is crazy is, indeed, crazy,
posted by Samizdata at 7:37 PM on March 20, 2018
> "The eagle has the longest life-span of its species."
That line had me rolling on the floor even before @compartment's spot-on exegesis.
> the rock star and Indiana Jones of the superfoods
He's selling himself short. He's the rock star and Indiana Jones of Andy Kaufmans and that thing Joaquin Phoenix was trying to do a few year back when he was acting weird on Letterman.
posted by bunbury at 9:23 PM on March 20, 2018 [1 favorite]
That line had me rolling on the floor even before @compartment's spot-on exegesis.
> the rock star and Indiana Jones of the superfoods
He's selling himself short. He's the rock star and Indiana Jones of Andy Kaufmans and that thing Joaquin Phoenix was trying to do a few year back when he was acting weird on Letterman.
posted by bunbury at 9:23 PM on March 20, 2018 [1 favorite]
> (you know, the famous eagle flight? the one you heard about?)
I think I have heard about that one. That's the one where it shoes the children with no shoes on their feet, right?
posted by bunbury at 9:28 PM on March 20, 2018 [4 favorites]
I think I have heard about that one. That's the one where it shoes the children with no shoes on their feet, right?
posted by bunbury at 9:28 PM on March 20, 2018 [4 favorites]
Want a super-easy way to thin out your Facebook friends list? CLICK HERE
13! But I live in Portland, Oregon where we can't even get people to vote for fluoridated water out of fear for government mind control.
posted by elwoodwiles at 10:24 PM on March 20, 2018
13! But I live in Portland, Oregon where we can't even get people to vote for fluoridated water out of fear for government mind control.
posted by elwoodwiles at 10:24 PM on March 20, 2018
Want a super-easy way to thin out your Facebook friends list? CLICK HERE
Well that was distressing.
posted by Joh at 11:10 PM on March 20, 2018 [1 favorite]
Well that was distressing.
posted by Joh at 11:10 PM on March 20, 2018 [1 favorite]
Just the two, one who's an acquaintance of my brother, who I lived with for a week, and took it personally that I didn't initially accept her friend request, aaaaaaand... my best friend's new fiancee.
That's going to be a fun conversation, he's even less tolerant of woo than I am.
posted by Merus at 11:22 PM on March 20, 2018
That's going to be a fun conversation, he's even less tolerant of woo than I am.
posted by Merus at 11:22 PM on March 20, 2018
I'm going to have defend your David Wolfe following friends. Part of his schtick is posting benign inspirational quotes like these ones. I've actually liked some of them before I knew who he was. It's to draw you in and then hit you with the woo-crap.
A Science Enthusiast goes into more detail about his method:
For the most part, David will create a rather innocuous meme that is either cute or motivational in nature, so the casual Facebook user will be naturally inclined to share them. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with following a page that makes/disseminates good motivational quotes. However, David has a method to his madness, and does this in what I call “The David Avocado Wolfe Effect.”
posted by daybeforetheday at 11:25 PM on March 20, 2018 [3 favorites]
A Science Enthusiast goes into more detail about his method:
For the most part, David will create a rather innocuous meme that is either cute or motivational in nature, so the casual Facebook user will be naturally inclined to share them. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with following a page that makes/disseminates good motivational quotes. However, David has a method to his madness, and does this in what I call “The David Avocado Wolfe Effect.”
posted by daybeforetheday at 11:25 PM on March 20, 2018 [3 favorites]
I've also kept this bookmarked for when I see someone post his stuff.
posted by edd at 4:51 AM on March 21, 2018 [3 favorites]
posted by edd at 4:51 AM on March 21, 2018 [3 favorites]
So how do you find out which of your friends likes *whatever*? I want to see who likes that cabbage drink lady and other people so I can either silently judge them or outright mock them.
posted by cooker girl at 6:45 AM on March 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by cooker girl at 6:45 AM on March 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
I pressed the "how to clean up your friend list" facebook link while on my phone. I have never logged onto facebook from my phone. I barely use facebook and only have about 40 friends. It still knew who I was and which of my friends like him. This makes me want to get rid of facebook rather than get rid of my friend. Though even if I get rid of facebook, they will still know who I am. Maybe it's time to fully embrace?
posted by GregorWill at 7:03 AM on March 21, 2018
posted by GregorWill at 7:03 AM on March 21, 2018
Be kind to your friends, people sometimes favorite things like this when they're in pain or feeling lost and need hope.
And as long as these people aren't able to make legislative, health, or meal choices for you and aren't trying to convert you, then they have just marked themselves as 'someone interesting to have nonsensical conversations with'. Which isn't a bad thing over drinks.
posted by The_Vegetables at 7:34 AM on March 21, 2018
And as long as these people aren't able to make legislative, health, or meal choices for you and aren't trying to convert you, then they have just marked themselves as 'someone interesting to have nonsensical conversations with'. Which isn't a bad thing over drinks.
posted by The_Vegetables at 7:34 AM on March 21, 2018
So how do you find out which of your friends likes *whatever*? I want to see who likes that cabbage drink lady and other people so I can either silently judge them or outright mock them. - cooker girl
I wondered the same thing. In order to use the method from Johnny Wallflower it is necessary to get the page ID, which is something I don't know how to do. I have looked at the internets, but no joy.
You can search for 'friends who like [Facebook page]' but it is not quite the same.
posted by asok at 9:20 AM on March 21, 2018
I wondered the same thing. In order to use the method from Johnny Wallflower it is necessary to get the page ID, which is something I don't know how to do. I have looked at the internets, but no joy.
You can search for 'friends who like [Facebook page]' but it is not quite the same.
posted by asok at 9:20 AM on March 21, 2018
A while back I posted something on Facebook condemning this guy and one of my friends commented that he seemed totally harmless and was just a health food advocate. It turns out she quite simply had no idea about all the bonkers stuff he peddles, like chocolate being sun energy and what have you. She appeared to be genuinely shocked.
posted by brundlefly at 11:49 AM on March 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by brundlefly at 11:49 AM on March 21, 2018 [1 favorite]
it is necessary to get the page ID
You can get the page ID from the profile photo up in the left hand corner. (I used Stones Throw as an example because I'm listening to Quasimoto at the moment.) And then you paste that number at the end of this URL https://www.facebook.com/browse/friended_fans_of/?page_id=
posted by soundofsuburbia at 12:16 PM on March 21, 2018 [4 favorites]
You can get the page ID from the profile photo up in the left hand corner. (I used Stones Throw as an example because I'm listening to Quasimoto at the moment.) And then you paste that number at the end of this URL https://www.facebook.com/browse/friended_fans_of/?page_id=
posted by soundofsuburbia at 12:16 PM on March 21, 2018 [4 favorites]
Want a super-easy way to thin out your Facebook friends list? CLICK HERE
I got 5, 4 of whom, I am sorry to say, are not bright. One of them has a PhD in sociology, but he is vegan and suuuuuuuuper woo, so I understand why he's on this list.
posted by chainsofreedom at 4:36 PM on March 21, 2018
I got 5, 4 of whom, I am sorry to say, are not bright. One of them has a PhD in sociology, but he is vegan and suuuuuuuuper woo, so I understand why he's on this list.
posted by chainsofreedom at 4:36 PM on March 21, 2018
Want a super-easy way to thin out your Facebook friends list? CLICK HERE
I only got one, and it was a woman I used to work with, whose husband is a hardcore Berniebro that I recently unfriended because I made a joke about male tears and he got all up in the comments about not all men and how would I feel if he made jokes about women. So.. no big loss.
posted by skycrashesdown at 4:49 PM on March 21, 2018
I only got one, and it was a woman I used to work with, whose husband is a hardcore Berniebro that I recently unfriended because I made a joke about male tears and he got all up in the comments about not all men and how would I feel if he made jokes about women. So.. no big loss.
posted by skycrashesdown at 4:49 PM on March 21, 2018
Honest question: Is there any evidence that women fall for this crap at a higher rate than men? Could be confirmation bias, but I seem to know a lot more women than men who are into this stuff. If this is truly the case, this could influence the development of effective countermeasures.
posted by ZenMasterThis at 4:44 AM on March 22, 2018
posted by ZenMasterThis at 4:44 AM on March 22, 2018
I have 6 FB friends who have liked that page 5 of which are women. The one man is a former colleague who appears to be trying to set himself up as a lifestyle guru/motivational speaker.
posted by mmascolino at 8:18 AM on March 22, 2018
posted by mmascolino at 8:18 AM on March 22, 2018
The majority of the 8 or so of mine are gainfully employed ex-raver types. I blame Ram Dass.
posted by rhizome at 9:45 AM on March 22, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by rhizome at 9:45 AM on March 22, 2018 [1 favorite]
> Want a super-easy way to thin out your Facebook friends list? CLICK HERE
Ten, blech. All women (most of my friends are women, though, so maybe that's not relevant), two who I'd expect (they're very woo), two who I really hope are reading it for funsies.
posted by The corpse in the library at 11:21 AM on March 22, 2018
Ten, blech. All women (most of my friends are women, though, so maybe that's not relevant), two who I'd expect (they're very woo), two who I really hope are reading it for funsies.
posted by The corpse in the library at 11:21 AM on March 22, 2018
Three, in my case. One is a young second cousin of mine, who is very poorly educated because she was homeschooled by her bipolar, high school drop out mother. The second is a former high school classmate, who was never too bright. The third is a friend who is a highly accomplished and talented artist (he studied at Parsons School of Design), is very well-travelled and sophisticated, and who generally has a good grasp of sociopolitical issues, so that one was a surprise.
posted by orange swan at 12:49 PM on March 22, 2018
posted by orange swan at 12:49 PM on March 22, 2018
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posted by Johnny Wallflower at 9:55 AM on March 20, 2018 [2 favorites]