Sled Dog Softness Index
September 27, 2018 10:43 AM   Subscribe

I will be ranking the sled dogs from least to most soft, on a scale of 1-10. To do this, I will use a scientific scale known as the SDSI, or Sled Dog Softness Index. Each dog’s score is based on two categories: the softness of individual hairs, and overall fluffiness.
posted by BuddhaInABucket (20 comments total) 30 users marked this as a favorite
They're soft dogs, Brent.
posted by explosion at 10:55 AM on September 27, 2018 [7 favorites]

Honestly one of the best Twitter threads of all time, and much-needed today.

Also worth noting that WeRateDogs recently named only its sixth ever 15/10.
posted by praemunire at 10:57 AM on September 27, 2018 [10 favorites]

That line about the pineapple just killed me. Great thread.
posted by martin q blank at 11:02 AM on September 27, 2018 [5 favorites]

The sled dog kennels at Denali National Park are open to the public, they let you walk in and meet the canine rangers. When you go in there is a large display with the basics on reading a dog's body language to tell if they are interested in making new friends or want to be left alone as well as some info on how to approach if you want to pet them. They're soft dogs, Brent.
posted by peeedro at 11:15 AM on September 27, 2018 [5 favorites]

Oh those little pups. oh my heart!
posted by Homo neanderthalensis at 11:22 AM on September 27, 2018 [1 favorite]

so soft, yet so far away

Blair Braverman previously (i wish we had a blairbraverman tag across all the posts, but alas)
posted by numaner at 11:46 AM on September 27, 2018 [2 favorites]

I have two cats, one soft (how soft? SO SOFT!!) and one sleek (how sleek? SO SLEEK!!) I really appreciate that I have to different textures to experience. I like that Braverman also seems to embrace diversity — it’s classification, not preference!
posted by GenjiandProust at 12:04 PM on September 27, 2018 [6 favorites]

I'm not even dog people and I want to pet them.  So much fluffy softness.
posted by los pantalones del muerte at 12:07 PM on September 27, 2018 [3 favorites]

Aaaah! I need all the soft floofy pups, kittehs, baby birds, etc. today. Today has been hard and sharp and pointy.
posted by agatha_magatha at 12:11 PM on September 27, 2018 [4 favorites]

I think I'm going to have to go there and pet all these dogs to verify these findings. You know, for science.

Is there a grant I can get for this?
posted by darksong at 12:18 PM on September 27, 2018 [8 favorites]

I have a dog who is quite soft but also very, very far along the sleekness continuum (which is good, because she has very little hair, period). She is also what we call a temperamentally soft dog, in that she does not like criticism and is sensitive to fairly minor "oh no!" things, because she cares very deeply about being a Good dog. Tribble hopes you're having a good day, or at least as good as can be expected.

Meanwhile, of the cats--oh, the softness is difficult to quantify, because desp. I have petted rabbit fur less soft and plush than my cats. But of them all, Peter is easily the most densely plush, adapted as he is to the feral Canadian winters, and Arthur Dent the most sleek. (You can see how thick Peter's hair is even on his legs here--he has hair finer and denser than even my friends' long-haired cats.) Ishka, in the middle of the pack for plushness, makes up for it by being easily the cat most determined to enjoy human contact--she will come running if I sit down to leap into my lap and demand to feel my warm human fingers.
posted by sciatrix at 12:43 PM on September 27, 2018 [1 favorite]

I was working late last night, and there were a bunch of other people still working as well that were trying to make an important deadline. They needed my help with something Fast and Right Away, but I only heard, like half of what they were saying because one of them had their dog in the office and doggo really wanted some pettings. Like, sure guys, the company's reputation and millions of dollars are probably riding on getting this stuff done and that's real important, but this dog wants to meet me so you're just going to have to wait.
posted by 5_13_23_42_69_666 at 1:26 PM on September 27, 2018 [7 favorites]

"His forehead is made of spun clouds and his ears are made of rainbows."

"Refried is 9 years old. She has run hundreds of miles with the silkiest, softest, plushest fur imaginable. She sings constantly, mile after mile, reveling in the feeling of being so soft and so strong and so kind and so beautiful and so loved."

Awwwwww sled puppers. Purr-dog is sleek and somewhat soft, but his ears are smooth velvet mixed with soft down. He also loves many tummy rubs.
posted by Hermeowne Grangepurr at 1:36 PM on September 27, 2018 [2 favorites]

Ooooh, exactly what the day needed, and then I went back to the previously and found puppies, and YES GOOD SOFT FLUFF.
posted by ldthomps at 1:43 PM on September 27, 2018

I would love to submit our husky Freya for your consideration (but I can't because the photo only lives on my computer so I have no online address sob)
posted by MovableBookLady at 3:34 PM on September 27, 2018 [1 favorite]

I've started playing Undertale (a 3-year-old small indie RPG that involves much (optional?) petting of dogs) for the first time a couple days ago, and I feel like this post makes way more sense than it would otherwise.
posted by sfenders at 4:45 PM on September 27, 2018 [1 favorite]

My experience of sled dogs is that you have to gauge the length of each one's chain exactly to avoid getting bit as you walk between them in someone's yard, while they all bark and howl. Beautiful to look at and good at their jobs, but not typically as snuggly and friendly as the ones in the photos here.
posted by Dip Flash at 5:31 PM on September 27, 2018

She sings constantly, mile after mile, reveling in the feeling of being so soft and so strong and so kind and so beautiful and so loved.

This is just an incredibly beautiful sentence.
posted by Anticipation Of A New Lover's Arrival, The at 5:38 PM on September 27, 2018 [5 favorites]

My favorite other animal rating thread: this guy rates the foxes

There are some seriously weird foxes out there.

(Sorry for the link to the zero-value-add someone-said-it-on-the-socials site, but I'm in a hurry here and those folks SEO is 10.0)
posted by Sauce Trough at 10:48 AM on September 28, 2018

I approve of this post.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 1:54 PM on September 28, 2018 [1 favorite]

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