ZOMBIELAND "What If" Cameos

March 26, 2020 7:42 PM

What would the Zombieland cameo be like if it had been for Patrick Swayze (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7), Sly Stallone, Mark Hamill, Joe Pesci, or Kevin Bacon? The Zombieland writers release their scripts for the cameos.

"Albuquerque" is Tallahassee (Woody Harrelson). "Flagstaff" is Columbus (Jesse Eisenberg). "Stillwater" is Little Rock (Abigail Breslin). Possible future script releases: The Rock, Jean Claude Van Damme, and Matthew McConaughey.

posted by WCityMike (5 comments total)

We would not be denied. Except, we kept getting fucking denied. This time, by @kevinbacon. Well, not directly. He reached out to us after the film released, confessing be a closet Zombie guy, that he loved the movie, said he had never even been sent the pages we wrote for him

That sounds a lot like what happened with Key and Peele's Keanu. Even though there alts are interesting, I can't think of anything that would've been funnier than the Bill Murray sequence, so I guess it worked out for the best.
posted by grandiloquiet at 8:25 PM on March 26, 2020 [1 favorite]

Elizabeth Taylor never got the notice she was asked after for the Krusty Gets Kancelled celebrity-filled episode of the SImpsons cause her rep turned them down and never told her, which made it into a joke on the show. "I ought to fire that agent."
posted by The Whelk at 11:42 PM on March 26, 2020 [1 favorite]

I love Zombieland, love Dirty Dancing, and love this.
posted by meinvt at 6:45 AM on March 27, 2020

Looks like the links for Swayze 6 and 7 are the same, actual 7.
posted by ckape at 3:56 PM on March 28, 2020

Script for Jean Claude Van Damme cameo. I didn't realize that the writers had also written Deadpool (Written by: The Real Heroes Here).

Just watched the sequel - I hadn't seen it when it was in theaters. It's pretty entertaining, but of course a lot of the enjoyment comes from familiarity rather than surprise.
posted by russilwvong at 10:21 PM on April 1, 2020