Rainy night, fireplace, blanket, sleepy kids curled up on the couch

January 18, 2022 7:09 PM

This Is What “Cozy” Looks Like Around the World (Apartment Therapy): “Is coziness an aesthetic brought about by carefully curated things, or is it a feeling rooted in something slightly intangible? You just know it when you see it and feel it, even if it doesn’t meet your own classic definition of cozy. We spoke to designers, creatives, and citizens of the globe to see what coziness looks like around the world.”
posted by not_the_water (30 comments total)

I don't know, all these spaces seem too tidy and curated to be "cozy" to me. For me, cozy means a dumpy couch, old ratty paperback books, a large heap of assorted blankets, snacks, and snuggly cats...and little to no concern for appearances.
posted by daisystomper at 7:40 PM on January 18, 2022 [16 favorites]

When I taught ESL, an early chapter in the textbook (comparatives/superlatives, and Looking For a Place to Live) introduced this vocabulary word, which was always a bit of a challenge to explain (although in the context of a For Rent ad, it always means 'small').
posted by Rash at 7:46 PM on January 18, 2022 [6 favorites]

For the longest time my ideal cosy space was one of the media-rich burrows found in the (fabulous) book Tokyo: A Certain Style. More recently, it has been one of those unmarked huts found on the side of a wind-blown mountain in Skyrim.
posted by turbid dahlia at 8:41 PM on January 18, 2022 [7 favorites]

I've always found it interesting how here in the tropics, I always think of "cozy" as a cool, probably air conditioned space.
posted by destrius at 8:54 PM on January 18, 2022 [6 favorites]

When I was a kid, I envisioned cozy as something a bit like when they showed the inside of Jeannie's bottle from the 60s tv show, I Dream of Jeannie. Something comfortable, private, and intimate. I think I still hold that view.
posted by 2N2222 at 9:44 PM on January 18, 2022 [14 favorites]

Photographer Peter Menzel turned "cozy" inside-out in his 1994 book Material World: A Global Family Portrait, in which families from around the world brought all their possessions outside their home to be photographed.
posted by fairmettle at 10:13 PM on January 18, 2022 [3 favorites]

For some reason, when I was a kid, Northern-hemisphere me had a very specific idea of what cozy would be when I grew up: a reading den made up of a ton of Afghan-pattern wool blankets and large pillows! as an adult, I find “mink” fleece blankets to be less itchy, and my back prefers smaller pillows, but I still love the same vibrant colors I envisioned so long ago (my folks were Danish modern/white wall afficionados, so I am the opposite) and lounging around with a stack of books.
posted by mollymillions at 10:45 PM on January 18, 2022 [2 favorites]

Sign me up for all of it - apart maybe from the place where it apparently involves a toilet.
In Scotland, we have the word "Couthie" - which equates both to somewhere which is cosy - and also to somebody who embodies those characteristics - somebody sociable, warm, friendly. Whether talking about a person or place, it is not always used in a complementary way - a couthie person or restaurant may be seeing as lacking worldliness and sophistication to some.
posted by rongorongo at 3:59 AM on January 19, 2022 [1 favorite]

I actually found a "Hygge Vibes" Facebook group and signed up for it, mainly because that's my jam these days. It's actually encouragingly good about perspective; every once in a blue moon we get someone posting some kind of old-timey farmhouse image and using it as the basis for a screed about how we were fools for giving up this kind of lifestyle and we should go back to growing our own food and stuff, and those posts get a lot of comments about how "hey let's not idealize those days, it took a lot of work and people struggled a lot" and things course-correct.

My only real complaint about it, though, is that it verges on twee a whole lot - chalkboard signs, floral-besprigged things. Not always, but...often. It's the same thing that kept the whole "cottagecore" thing from twigging with me. I think I'm more like a tomboy hygge or "cabincore" - where I don't have the flannel nightgown, I've got old second-hand flannel pants and a sweater, and a buffalo plaid blanket instead of a floral crocheted afghan. Nothing against flowers (I tend to really go for floral stuff in spring) but just in moderation. Like, instead of the cute vase, I want the picture of an apple tree branch ripped out of an old botanic guide that was falling apart.

I have this hoodie I got while in Kingston, NY a month ago - this dark gray thing that falls to mid-thigh, and it is fuzzy and floopy and baggy and I LOVE THAT THING. Even if it's sometimes too hot to wear most of the time in my apartment - I wear it and turn the heat down a little.

And baking - cookies, and simple cakes. Not fancy cakes - I have a couple half-sized bundt cake pans, each one JUST the right size fo a quick bread or pound cake recipe or half the size of a typical bundt cake recipe. They are perfect for a household of just two people (even when my roommate tends to blow through things quick, I still get a few slices in). The latest cake was a little "homier" than usual - it was a chocolate-mocha cake, and I decided to gild the lily and throw in some espresso chocolate chips; but the chips all sank to the bottom of the pan and so the cake stuck to the pan in places. But I don't care, it's still cake.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 4:07 AM on January 19, 2022 [13 favorites]

Things I know about cozy:

If it's cold outside, then a space must be warm to be considered cozy. (Major bonus points if some of that warmth comes from a fire.) The pre-industrial hearth is the Platonic ideal on which all other coziness is patterned.

There should be life about. Plants are mandatory; cats nearly so. Dogs work, but only the chill retriever-ish kind.

Textiles, wood, leather, and stone are cozy. Metal, glass, plastic, and concrete are not.

Good lighting goes a long way. (No overheads. Floor lamps, table lamps, and candles/lanterns only.)

A pleasing, lived-in kind of clutter: vintage-y knickknacks; books; throw rugs. Furniture and appointments arranged in enclosing layers and tiers: tall things against the wall behind shorter things; plants or textiles hanging down from above.

Seating which encourages everyone to face each other (not the TV).

Food smells - especially those of the fatty, carby, and/or sweet variety.

No one present should be dressed fancily. Cozy spaces are "come as you are" spaces.
posted by escape from the potato planet at 4:15 AM on January 19, 2022 [20 favorites]

Sort of agreeing with escape from the potato planet, there is a limit to whether you can tell something is cosy from a picture, cosy is the sum of way more than the decor.
posted by biffa at 4:19 AM on January 19, 2022 [1 favorite]

The value of the article to me was less about the pictures and more about the text. Learning what folks in different areas in the world had to say about their ideas of coziness was really neat. great post!
posted by lazaruslong at 5:07 AM on January 19, 2022 [3 favorites]

Interesting that a lot of the responses have in common physical comfort—like warmth or coolth, depending on location—and relaxation, but only a few include being surrounded by family. Although maybe those who didn’t mention it assumed it would be obvious? I’m not much of a people person, so I always picture “cozy” as the physical comfort (warm and blankety or cool and breezy) plus books and cats, me alone or with just one or two of my best people.
posted by scratch at 6:39 AM on January 19, 2022 [1 favorite]

I once found a McDonalds on U.S. 1 to be cozy. It was an unexpectedly impactful snowstorm, traffic was backed up for miles, the sun had set, and they had warm food, wifi, and big windows to look out at the flakes falling on their brightly lit parking lot. As if by magic, as soon as the snow stopped falling and I was no longer trapped there, it stopped being cozy and reverted back to just a generic fast food establishment.
posted by RonButNotStupid at 6:44 AM on January 19, 2022 [23 favorites]

The value of the article to me was less about the pictures and more about the text. Learning what folks in different areas in the world had to say about their ideas of coziness was really neat.

I love the text but I felt like many many more pictures were in order.

great post!

Indeed!
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 6:47 AM on January 19, 2022

RonButNotStupid, that’s lovely. It reminded me that a feeling of safety is crucial to coziness, at least to me.
posted by scratch at 6:56 AM on January 19, 2022 [8 favorites]

(I felt similarly one day during a big big storm, when I was at work in a large, harshly lit, moderately noisy, generic-cubicle-farm office space. It got dark in the middle of the day and the rain was beating on the windowpanes. I didn’t much like being there in general, but that day I did.)
posted by scratch at 7:01 AM on January 19, 2022 [5 favorites]

My toddler has been learning to love a hot shower. He’s labeled it “cozy rain”. He may be a numbskull who eats erasers, but he has a point.
posted by saturday_morning at 7:35 AM on January 19, 2022 [27 favorites]

just chiming in on escape from the potato planet's listed item: my appreciation for 'cozy' however we experience that is immeasurably heightened by a wretchedly cold mid-winter Alberta day. Cozy requires context I think, and that element of safety, comfort, and shelter from the (elements) is for me, a vital aspect.
posted by elkevelvet at 7:36 AM on January 19, 2022 [1 favorite]

A hammock* under the mangroves by a small empty beach somewhere in the Caribbean, a fully loaded kindle, some ice water or fruit juice and my son and wife nearby.

* really leaning into the South American stereotype…
posted by signal at 7:46 AM on January 19, 2022 [1 favorite]

Seating which encourages everyone to face each other (not the TV).

good point. True coziness banishes the TV to another room. I've never lived in a home that had a TV in its living room (with the exception of a couple in which the TV was almost always covered with quilt, only to be removed at specific times).
posted by philip-random at 8:24 AM on January 19, 2022

My first thought is that what is cozy is when one feels safe.
posted by ob1quixote at 8:26 AM on January 19, 2022 [5 favorites]

a reading den made up of a ton of Afghan-pattern wool blankets and large pillows!

This reminds me of a word used by a younger generation of stoners I knew twenty years ago who developed the notion that in the Middle East or the desert somewhere, a room or a tent done up like this was called the mufraj (or mufrazh? Google isn't helping here) and they all wanted their dedicated smoking dens decorated like this. Pier One was their source for this decor.
posted by Rash at 8:49 AM on January 19, 2022 [2 favorites]

this thread feels cozy! I love reading pleasant chatter about coziness
posted by Emily's Fist at 9:26 AM on January 19, 2022 [8 favorites]

Aside from the other things mentioned, I think that just like in the For Rent ads cozy does also mean small, but in a positive sense.

To me personally, it means being both warm and dry. I have often been cozy on a summer day while wrapped up in a blanket but that's because I live in the UK where a summer's day may well be cold and damp. It's interesting to see that warmth as a pre-requisite is not universal.
posted by plonkee at 9:31 AM on January 19, 2022

I've lived in warm climates for most of my life, but my family is historically from New England until my generation. So for me, I find that cozy isn't too off from my office where I'm sitting now on a day like today.

It's currently 59°F outside, my window is open so I can hear the world and feel just the faintest tickle of coolness contrasting against the warmth of my office which is comfortably filled with knick knacks, books, my grandfather's rocker and a chair quilt made by my mom.
posted by drewbage1847 at 9:46 AM on January 19, 2022 [1 favorite]

I have started including "solitude" in my own definition. Living in Brooklyn is probably part of why - I love my friends, I get on great with my roommate, but...after being in public where there are so many other people - people I do know and people I don't - "cozy" means "I'm not 'on' for other people". And even when my roommate is holed up in his mancave downstairs he's still around, so that doesn't necessarily count.

Tonight, though, he is out joining a weekly board game club, and I have a shit-ton of eggs and cheese and the DVD for my latest movie for my blog and so when I get home I am going to put on that big floopy hoodie and make a cheese souffle and drag out a blanket and eat that souffle on the couch while watching that film, with a slice of the ugly mocha cake and ice cream for dessert.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 9:53 AM on January 19, 2022 [4 favorites]

I'm having trouble coming up with a definition of cozy other than being satisfied with how the current situation and/or environment is brushing up against you.

I've been to small lakeside cabins. Hitting your head on door frames and having to step over the coffee table just to get to a chair is not cozy. But I've also (in the Before Times at least) been in tightly packed rooms with family and friends laughing over board games late into the night and that's definitely cozy. I've spent time cozily sitting on a couch reading, but I've also occasionally sat on that same couch while waiting for a call from the hospital and that's not even remotely cozy.
posted by RonButNotStupid at 1:45 PM on January 19, 2022

Funny I've been thinking about this a lot lately, especially wondering what people from warm climates think of as cosy. I agree with the others who've mentioned that safety is an important part of it, and I realized that may be a part of why I find cosiness so elusive, because I'm always anxious about something, or worried about work that needs to be done.

It also occurred to me that pictures can never convey the full feeling of cosiness because it should involve as many senses as possible. In my quest for cosiness I started listening to the Muji Calm Spotify Playlist while I work. I love the idea of hot cocoa, but in reality a nice roll and butter is the ticket. I don't like scented candles but smells that are cosy to me are pine (like fresh Christmas trees) or rose. I don't wrap up in blankets but I have almost always had an oversized mohair sweater in my life.
posted by maggiemaggie at 7:36 PM on January 19, 2022

When I was a kid I wanted nothing more in the world than John's bed in the "Help" movie - see #s 9 and 10 on this list. You can't tell in those pictures but the side where his head is also has a bookshelf built in. These days I'm too old to want to literally climb out of bed every morning, but it's still one of the first things that always comes to mind when I think "cozy".
posted by skycrashesdown at 10:16 PM on January 20, 2022 [2 favorites]