It's strange but it's true, yeah

May 2, 2022 2:51 AM

5 Things to Know About this Thread: 1) It wants to break free; 2) You're so self-satisfied, it doesn't need you; 3) It's fallen in love for the first time; 4) This time it knows it's for real; 5) God knows it wants to break free.

Hello, and welcome to another free thread; enjoy free rain here ☔️! Also free rein 🐎! Or make like a Queen and enjoy free reign 👑!

Look, it's broken free, is all I'm sayin'.

posted by taz (148 comments total)

did you know that fear of giants is feefiphobia?
posted by pyramid termite at 3:40 AM on May 2, 2022 [36 favorites]

Today I have to report to my office for the first time since the lockdown. More than two years. I used to do this five days a week. It hardly seems possible now, but I did. I’m all weirded out.
posted by scratch at 3:53 AM on May 2, 2022 [13 favorites]

I am reading the novel A Visit From The Goon Squad by Jennifer Egan. I have had at least three instances of synchronicity while reading it; that is to say that I completely and totally relate to some of the situations and/or characters while reading it. Some moments of "hey that's me!", so I suppose the universe is telling me I should be reading A Visit From The Goon Squad. (Also, it seems to be a good novel though I've only read the first few chapters and have no idea where it's going and no sense yet of whether or not that apparent aimlessness is a good thing.)
posted by zardoz at 4:05 AM on May 2, 2022 [4 favorites]

Roller blades, but like unicycles with one giant wheel on each foot.
posted by Literaryhero at 4:10 AM on May 2, 2022

Roller blades, but like unicycles with one giant wheel on each foot.

Jumbo Heelys?
posted by Halloween Jack at 4:21 AM on May 2, 2022

People will already be starting to celebrate the end of Ramadhan/Ramadan/Ramzan and the beginning of Syawal/Shawwal this week (1st day of Eid is starting to be announced from Sunday to Tuesday in various communities), sooooo taking the opportunity to wish everyone Eid Mubarak! Now I'm gonna go back to stuffing my face.
posted by cendawanita at 4:28 AM on May 2, 2022 [12 favorites]

I love this song. It’s on a playlist of less stereotypically ‘80s bops from the ‘80s that I have made to listen to lately, along with Oingo Boingo’s “Private Life” and Bauhaus’s “Bela Lugosi’s Dead.” If anyone has another suggestion for such a list, I would be interested to hear it.
posted by Countess Elena at 4:34 AM on May 2, 2022 [3 favorites]

1 week til Eurovision!

I'm headed back home after a long weekend at my mom's and the train is mostly empty so far. Will probably have a busy afternoon at work before I can actually go home, since the other legal assistant is off today and I'm only doing a half day. Will grab an extra coffee from the café car to be safe.
posted by the primroses were over at 4:59 AM on May 2, 2022 [4 favorites]

Speaking of music! I come to once again plug D-Side Radio, a station with pretty meticulously curated playlists and sets that lean hard into the dark alternative. Most of the time it's like listening to a gothier Live 105 in 1987, although it occasionally veers into a sort of German dance music space I'm less familiar with but not totally opposed to.
posted by majick at 5:02 AM on May 2, 2022 [2 favorites]

I’ll bet you think this thread is about you, don’t you, don’t you?
posted by ricochet biscuit at 5:21 AM on May 2, 2022 [6 favorites]

OMG Zardoz that book is so damn good. I re-read it during the pandemic and I swear I think it got better since my first time through. Something to look forward to if you do end up loving it; Egan just published a follow-up of sorts called The Candy House, which is just as brilliant and compulsively readable.
posted by minervous at 5:32 AM on May 2, 2022 [3 favorites]

Would someone please come up with an app that lets you listen to your own music when you are on hold?
posted by InkaLomax at 5:53 AM on May 2, 2022 [26 favorites]

I read all of the Murderbot Diaries in the last few days and only now am I realizing the premise and the main protagonist have uncomfortable parallels with my current situation. I cannot, of course, infiltrate and redirect the health portal of my medical conglomerate or blast my partner's various health practices into compliance, but I am fairly annoyed and prickly most of the time, or at least more than usual. On the plus side, I got a very nice Amazon/Goodreads review.
posted by Peach at 6:05 AM on May 2, 2022 [10 favorites]

Well. I don't have to work this week. And yesterday my wife left for a week trip taking a group of high schoolers down 100 miles of river on kayaks.

So I'm alone in the middle of nowhere with nothing but my pets for company for a week. I guess I can drive a half hour to town but... hahaha why would I, also yikes the gas!
What will I even DO with all this time?! I feel like my glasses are about to break or something...




Also omg I love murderbot aaaaaaaa
posted by wellifyouinsist at 6:09 AM on May 2, 2022 [10 favorites]

I stumbled upon this Sudoku with only 4 given digits a week or two ago. Last week I got to where I could solve it on paper with no help. (other than having watched the video once)
My new favorite Sudoku, and Simon seems perfect for the role of Sudoku commentator.
posted by MtDewd at 6:12 AM on May 2, 2022

Watched Netflix last night, for the first time in a couple of days. I didn’t think it was possible to make the Netflix interface worse, but somehow their UX devs pulled it off. What is up with that new sidebar of suggestions along the right side of the screen? And, why is the default to have navigation focus over there?
posted by Thorzdad at 6:16 AM on May 2, 2022 [2 favorites]

The thread wants to break free, but I am uncertain whether it will ever give me up or let me down.
posted by allegedly at 6:18 AM on May 2, 2022 [11 favorites]

Well, it's definitely going to run around. This is known.
posted by taz at 6:19 AM on May 2, 2022 [5 favorites]

It seems this exercise video from the 90s was actually filmed in an industrial dystopia.
posted by Monochrome at 6:26 AM on May 2, 2022 [3 favorites]

I love the title of this post.

Now I'm going to spend the entire day with a Queen mind-worm running through my head. Damnit.

I am also glad to be reminded that I was going to try organize a Eurovision party in time to actually do so instead of remembering it twenty minutes in. Thanks, the primroses were over.
posted by eotvos at 6:44 AM on May 2, 2022 [2 favorites]

I'll avoid over-sharing, but it's so good to know there's still a little magic in the air.
posted by eotvos at 6:59 AM on May 2, 2022 [6 favorites]

I want to ride my bicycle...
posted by humbug at 7:05 AM on May 2, 2022 [3 favorites]

Rain is never free. There is always a cost. Trust me. I know.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 7:06 AM on May 2, 2022 [4 favorites]

allegedly - it is never going to run around or desert you.

On a recent call, the senior developer on my team suggested that we needed to start coming into the office to ramp up to being back in the office, to meet the department head's expectation of being in the office three days a week. He proposed we start by coming in every Friday since we do our planning on alternate Fridays.

The proposal went over as well as could be expected, which was not at all, not only because FRIDAY!?, but also because of a bunch of other factors (such as all of us knowing that the senior dev is angling to set a schedule which forces all of us in the office the same days every week but only on a schedule that suits him and will be subject to change at his whim - which violates the promised flexible work policy). One of the junior developers outright challenged him during the call and I am SO PROUD of him.

I'm in the process of transitioning out of the team, but I will not be officially out until next January so I see a very long seven months in my future.
posted by theBigRedKittyPurrs at 7:09 AM on May 2, 2022 [3 favorites]

Countess Elena, the gulf dividing Bauhaus and Luba is nearly insurmountable but if you need a smidgeon of supremely earnest, heart-in-the-right-place 80s pop, you might check out Luba (Lubomyra Kowalchyk), a staple of 80s Canadian music diet.

I feel like the during consultation for the video for Let it Go the band was presented with 3 different scenarios and they just said "Yes"

How Many (Rivers to Cross)
Innocent (With an Explanation)

obligatory Cory Hart
posted by elkevelvet at 7:20 AM on May 2, 2022 [1 favorite]

Muddling my way through the workday with COVID. I started feeling sick last Monday, tested negative last Wednesday and positive last Friday. The doctor's note I got on Saturday confirming the diagnosis and got me out of jury duty for the week, but that was only after I faxed them (in the year of our lord 2022) the note.
posted by emelenjr at 7:22 AM on May 2, 2022 [3 favorites]

It's totally going to let you down.

(and if I'm wrong, think about how good you'll feel about it).

So my rando thing is that I actually did letterboxing for the Victorian Socialists this evening. We have an election coming up, and I know VS are a fringe party (we've got one councillor locally, but not my Ward), and my seat is so safe Labor that it's silly (and thus receives no pork funding from either major party), but (A) that's the joy of preferential voting, and (B) primary votes mean funding, and I'm hoping that the users of those letterboxes understand that.

The big push is to put someone who has actually been subject to Australia's inhumane process of dealing with refugees into the Senate.

Queensland seems to punt Nazis to Canberra regularly, so I'm hoping we might squeeze in a sane person.
posted by pompomtom at 7:47 AM on May 2, 2022 [2 favorites]

Ugh. Stupid Microsoft Outlook silently failed again when my VPN connection was interrupted. Instead of prompting me to re-authenticate, it happy spent the last two hours pretending everything was fine and only when I quit/restarted it did all the emails I thought I sent this morning actually go out. And Teams just did the same thing, and everyone's wondering where I've been all morning.

It's been a while since I've been so heavily inside the Microsoft ecosystem. Is this failing silent like the new hotness?

I hate vscode with a burning passion because to get any sort of error message at all I have to toggle "developer tools" as if I'm not already a developer!
posted by RonButNotStupid at 8:00 AM on May 2, 2022 [3 favorites]

I don't want to keep chatfiltering in my vole AskMe but after I miraculously "trapped" that vole in my dog's food toy NOW I HAVE ANOTHER ONE. It's not the same one--I know because this one is not as cute and round. How can I have more than one vole inside the house when the internet says they only get here by mistake and don't want to be here???

I'm beginning to think the internet is wrong.
posted by HotToddy at 8:02 AM on May 2, 2022 [7 favorites]

Also, I've been on a bit of a spending spree lately, feeling completely justified because I am so extraordinarily frugal, have met all of my ambitious savings goals, and have a bit of extra just sitting there doing nothing. After a few weeks of this it suddenly occurred to me that this is exactly what I did last spring, and afterward had felt bewildered that I had betrayed my cheapskate values so wantonly, and had determined to be on guard for any spring spending hypomania this year. At least I came to my senses within the returns period this time.
posted by HotToddy at 8:09 AM on May 2, 2022 [1 favorite]

So, we finally opened Evita. Opening night included issues with the giant revolving door, one of the actors trying to be stage manager at the same time (oy) and Evita suddenly throwing up after drinking too much water. The show was briefly interrupted to announce that one of the actors was feeling ill, but after the barfing, she was fine and the show continued. And got a standing O, of all things. Go figure after that one.

The rest of the weekend went better than that. The roach spraying is presumably done and now I have to figure out when I have the time to put alllllllllllll the crap back.

I am very tired and this week will not be any more relaxing since I have to go into the office three days (bleah), am driving out to the new gig from last week's audition right after work in the crazy traffic, and my favorite festival of the year in town is happening this weekend.
posted by jenfullmoon at 8:11 AM on May 2, 2022 [4 favorites]

Also, while writing my last comment on a phone while riding the bus, I looked up the lyrics to Brighton Rock. . . and I always heard it as, "it's so good to know there's still a little magic in the air, and we must bear." And every transcription online shows it as "I'll weave my spell." I think I like the song less now. But, I believe I've been wrong for decades.
posted by eotvos at 8:24 AM on May 2, 2022

and Evita suddenly throwing up after drinking too much water

then you just nonchalantly threw in the thing about the roach spraying.. is your middle name Job by any chance? your week can only get better! I blame Countess Elena for taking me back to the 80s, here's one for you!
posted by elkevelvet at 8:30 AM on May 2, 2022

I got let go last week because I am disabled and stated I would prefer to not return to the office (I had to go back to using my cane three days into the supposed return). They’re not going to fight me on unemployment thankfully.

So I’m job hunting looking for LGBTQ+ friendly places and meanwhile taking classes.

So that’s not that fun.
posted by mephron at 8:32 AM on May 2, 2022 [9 favorites]

Theatrical productions, you say? My 8-year-old is an Oompa-Loompa in an elementary school production of Willy Wonka, basically the first big working-together-in-the-same-room project the school has had in two years. It's been, um, a little uneven at times, but they've mostly pulled through, thanks in large part to the woman running the show, who started from the position "everything that can go wrong will, so we will have ALL THE REDUNDANCY" and cast two or three kids for each role. The final show is tonight, and yesterday she sent out an email that you'd have to squint at very hard to notice the panicked undertone, telling us all what a fantastic audience we've all been, and oh by the way both our Wonkas just tested positive for COVID and the understudy is still quarantined, so does anyone out there think they know the lines well enough to step in as the lead?

The show is at 5:30. I don't know how to feel about it.
posted by Mayor West at 8:34 AM on May 2, 2022 [9 favorites]

I hope someone for Eurovision does a song, Fuck, Fuck, Putin. I hope it wins.
posted by dances_with_sneetches at 8:38 AM on May 2, 2022 [2 favorites]

the free threads always develop a theme or two and I'd say Great Moments/Historic Disasters at the Theatre is beginning to emerge...

for my part: high school drama festival, the performer was reciting her line with great gusto, and her breast popped out of her bodice. she turned crimson and proceeded to correct her wardrobe and finish her part before exiting the stage on cue. the high school audience cheered so loudly and for an extended period, the show had to pause. It was a Shakespeare piece but I cannot recall if it was Midsummer or Merchant.
posted by elkevelvet at 8:42 AM on May 2, 2022 [3 favorites]

It's a holiday in the UK and I've been frittering away my not-so-valuable time on YouTube for the last hour, a pastime made worthwhile by stumbling on some songs by a very impressive new artist called Saya Gray - e.g. If There’s No Seat in the Sky (Will You Forgive Me???).
posted by misteraitch at 8:52 AM on May 2, 2022 [1 favorite]

High school production of The Music Man back in 1981.

Second or third night of the show. All had gone pretty much perfectly. One scene has Harold dancing with Marian...

Harold somehow steps on her skirt, and being a stage costume, not held together by much, it comes off. So Marian is now standing there in her underwear.

They did a great job dealing with it. Marian grabbed it, scooted offstage, Harold vamped a bit, and Marian came back out and they continued. Pretty solid for HS seniors.
posted by Windopaene at 9:01 AM on May 2, 2022 [3 favorites]

I continue to struggle with fatigue from my anemia that was discovered in January. I'm getting an iron infusion today so that should help. Two weeks ago I went from working half days to full days and that has turned out to be 9-10 hours every day which really isn't doable. I have to lie down as soon as I get home from work.

And my coworker went to Cabo the week before last and came down with Covid last Tuesday. He has a Serious Underlying Illness and he's pretty sick although thankfully not bad enough to be hospitalized. Hopefully he can return to work next week.

I have listened to an old favorite album, Breakfast in America, about a dozen times in the last two weeks.

We've had a remarkably cold and wet April. I wouldn't be surprised if it were the coldest April ever here. It's been consistently 5-10 degrees below normal all but a couple of days. A week of warm sunshine would do me so much good. Perhaps I'll go to Cabo.
posted by neuron at 9:05 AM on May 2, 2022 [4 favorites]

I too miss Supertramp.

Too bad the one guy went all religious and they broke up. Child of Vision is a banger
posted by Windopaene at 9:09 AM on May 2, 2022 [2 favorites]

my HS drama teacher had us perform a show that was based on Supertramp's Breakfast in America. I cannot listen to those songs anymore. My brother attended a Supertramp show in Halifax a lifetime ago, apparently opening act (Gowan) stole the evening.
posted by elkevelvet at 9:14 AM on May 2, 2022 [1 favorite]

Best stage moment I've been part of: I was in a high school production of Alice In Wonderland which we'd adapted ourselves, with original songs and everything. It was a wild, rollicking production involving all sorts of prop weirdness and odd costuming. At one point in the preparations for the play, I drove our director to a local college theater department in my VW bus, and we returned with a bunch of props including a rickety old full-sized fake horse.

The legs were boards that were slotted into the torso and the head was held on with safety pins, but we figured it would hold out for a few shows. And it did, but we got held over. So on the last night, as my friend Rob as the White Knight (in a full cowboy costume for whatever reason) got rolled out on fake horseback, one of the legs broke and the whole thing collapsed under him. He jumped clear, leapt up, whipped the cap gun from his holster, and shot the fake horse. He shook his head sadly and continued with the scene. Or he tried to, it took a while for the applause to die down.

If I'm lucky, today I'll have a chance to plead with a surgeon to take my case and operate on me soon, because ow. Wish me luck.
posted by MrVisible at 9:14 AM on May 2, 2022 [7 favorites]

I heard the new MUNA song "Kind of Girl" this weekend, played it at least a dozen times, and decided I need to carry it around for a while.

It hit as it did because I'm at that point in therapy where you've just had the kind of big shift in thinking that swings a light around to another angle and what was familiar territory under the old light suddenly looks confrontingly foreign, and then the moment after that where you begin to see all the adjustment this new perspective will require and think "This is too hard. Maybe I didn't want to do this in the first place."

Yeah, I like tеlling stories
But I don't have to write them in ink
I could still change the end
At least I'm the kind of girl
I'm the kind of girl who thinks I can
posted by jocelmeow at 9:40 AM on May 2, 2022 [7 favorites]

I've been enjoying the ExperiencedDevs subreddit for programmers. Decently moderated, usually good commentary by professionals, growing slowly but not yet quite popular enough to have attracted all the trolls and FAANG wannabes... which, I suppose, is a matter of time, so I'm sharing it while I can!
posted by SunSnork at 9:49 AM on May 2, 2022 [3 favorites]

In re. Supertramp: Brother, Where You Bound is a rollercoaster and I love it.

Light grumping.
posted by JustSayNoDawg at 10:04 AM on May 2, 2022

I've been doing a bit of a random trawl of YouTube for a few weeks now as a way to get out of doom scrolling and NPRhounding, and came across a movie review for RRR, which is apparently the single biggest movie in India right now, perhaps ever. It's a giant action film with the expected dance numbers (it's not Bollywood, it's one of the other studios and in a different language). Anyway, here is the review [32m], and here is the absolutely insane dance number that comes halfway through the film, Naatu Naatu [4m34s].
posted by hippybear at 10:26 AM on May 2, 2022 [6 favorites]

Someone made a post on our neighborhood Facebook group about a car being broken in to near the police station. Apparently a panga (that's basically a machete) was used to break the car's rear window.
Except the person writing the post made a typo, and stated that "they used a panda to break the rear window".
Which made me so happy. 🐼

I swam out to the shark net at Fishoek today at high tide. Found a bee floating in the waves, still alive. Swam to shore with the bee in my hand, holding it above the waves. Had to get out at a rocky bit, one bee-holding hand up in the air while being knocked about by waves.
Clambered out onto the promenade and put the bee on a twig. In the sun.
She was still alive and started washing herself. I know this was a ridiculous thing to do as the bee probably won't survive for long but at least she could be dry and warm for a bit.
🐝🌊
posted by Zumbador at 10:27 AM on May 2, 2022 [16 favorites]

"I'm beginning to think the internet is wrong..."
Great t-shirt idea!
posted by Oyéah at 10:28 AM on May 2, 2022 [5 favorites]

Since bugs are a developing theme - we discovered we had carpenter ants last week when they essentially swarmed a window in kiddo's bedroom on the first truly warm, sunny day of the year. Kiddo freaked, I sprayed them with white vinegar to kill the ones we could see, spouse did the cleanup and calling of the exterminator.

Good news - they only seem to be in one area and the damage is minimal. Exterminator exterminated and will come back in three months to reassess.

Bad news - That particular window is completely dry-rotted and there are at least nine other ones of the same vintage that will also need to be replaced, so he is collecting estimates on that as well.
posted by theBigRedKittyPurrs at 10:38 AM on May 2, 2022 [1 favorite]

I went with a lace curtain on a spring loaded curtain rod, to be my front door bug screen, for now, with a standing room divider. I spend a bit of time here in the mornings so it works. Lots of light.
posted by Oyéah at 10:39 AM on May 2, 2022

My spouse is two weeks from completing her master's degree. She began in 1989 and then life intervened. I have been editing her papers for her, wrestling with MS Word, an application I thought I knew so well. Wow, are there a lot of irritations in Word with one of the most exasperating being the continuous re-location of certain menu items—especially the paragraph formatting menu. Sometimes it is on the context menu and sometimes not and sometimes nowhere at all.
posted by bz at 10:52 AM on May 2, 2022 [7 favorites]

My wife and I bought a 97 year old house, our first, that is huge and weird but really well taken care of (so it seems/the inspector thought). I hope it doesn't fall down on me. I hope my cats like it.
posted by OnTheLastCastle at 10:53 AM on May 2, 2022 [7 favorites]

Wow, are there a lot of irritations in Word

Yes, the dynamic menus are one of the reasons I really hate Word these days. I think there are ways to pin things to the top bar above the menus in Windows as quick click items, and you might be able to pin things into menus or even turn off the dynamic menuing altogether.

One of my biggest software losses was when macOS went 64 bit and I lost my beloved copy of Word For Mac 05.
posted by hippybear at 10:57 AM on May 2, 2022 [1 favorite]

High school production of The Music Man back in 1981.

Second or third night of the show. All had gone pretty much perfectly. One scene has Harold dancing with Marian...

Local college production of The Threepenny Opera in the nineties. I am in the orchestra and onstage, upstage and stage right. (Brecht wanted to reinforce the artificiality of a play, so the orchestra is in full view onstage).

Peachum has a number with, er, Pirate Jenny maybe? The actor stretched and lunged with too much gusto and split the back of his trousers from waistband to the point where all the seams join. We in the orchestra can see he was going commando.

With still ninety seconds or so in the song, and a lengthy scene for him almost immediately after, he changed the blocking on the fly so that at no point was he facing away from the audience even for a second. At the end of the song he darted off into the wings and dropped his trousers for the wardrobe people to hastily repair it with some duck tape inside, then he made his entrance perhaps four seconds later right on cue.

I guess he did okay; the director was in the audience that night and did not spot anything out of the ordinary.
posted by ricochet biscuit at 11:27 AM on May 2, 2022 [5 favorites]

The actor stretched and lunged with too much gusto and split the back of his trousers from waistband to the point where all the seams join.

Something similar happened to Lil Nas X live on SNL not too many weeks ago.
posted by hippybear at 11:34 AM on May 2, 2022 [1 favorite]

In celebration of May Day, I wrote for my friends my first haiku in over a decade:

O May Day / Beltane
Bonfires for summers’ coming
and eating the rich.
posted by Silvery Fish at 11:36 AM on May 2, 2022 [4 favorites]

Word 5 for Mac was the best word processor ever. Did exactly what was needed and didn’t try to be a desktop publishing package as well.

Best non-GUI word processor ever was WordPerfect. When they added the GUI, it all went to Hell.

Opinionated grumping.
posted by JustSayNoDawg at 11:41 AM on May 2, 2022 [3 favorites]

We’re back from an over-long trip to Italy. We got Covid while there and had to isolate for 20 (additional, unplanned) days in a hotel room, only venturing out twice to get tested at a pharmacy. The trip home was epic, for a number of reasons, and we ended up walking over six miles in various airports before our 28–hour trip was done.
Only home a week, and we’re both still very lethargic/fatigued, and I still have some lingering symptoms (mild congestion, cough, and stuffed ears). Could be long Covid, or just taking a while to get better. We tested negative almost exactly two weeks ago.
posted by dbmcd at 11:47 AM on May 2, 2022 [2 favorites]

May will be my month for getting my affairs in order. I'm not planning on dying right away, but thinking about the challenges that face my executor, it seems both sensible and considerate to put forward the effort to collect the necessary documents and make what arrangements I can, to spare another person the pain of having to puzzle it out when I'm gone. Disposing of my savings and investments is easy. But what about my keys? What about my DVD collection? OMG! My comic books?! There's a lot to think about.
posted by SPrintF at 11:55 AM on May 2, 2022 [6 favorites]

I am reading the novel A Visit From The Goon Squad by Jennifer Egan. - zardoz

Just finished her The Candy Store, which was really really good.

I read all of the Murderbot Diaries in the last few days and only now am I realizing the premise and the main protagonist have uncomfortable parallels with my current situation. - Peach

I'm currently on my third re-read of the series. They are weirdly soothing when I feel like my life is spinning out of control. The irony of consuming media about somebody who consumes media to relax to relax.
posted by joannemerriam at 11:58 AM on May 2, 2022 [7 favorites]

then you just nonchalantly threw in the thing about the roach spraying.. is your middle name Job by any chance?

I am a minor chaos magnet and once in awhile SHIT JUST EXPLODES around me, though technically pretty much none of that last week was a directed-at-me-personally thing. I'm glad it's only minor, as I've known a few people who are horrendous chaos magnets and have insane life stories (example: Matthew Dicks, who's had near death, near-jail experiences). The whole chaos magnet thing is why I do storytelling, though.

"everything that can go wrong will, so we will have ALL THE REDUNDANCY" and cast two or three kids for each role. The final show is tonight, and yesterday she sent out an email that you'd have to squint at very hard to notice the panicked undertone, telling us all what a fantastic audience we've all been, and oh by the way both our Wonkas just tested positive for COVID and the understudy is still quarantined, so does anyone out there think they know the lines well enough to step in as the lead?

Oh man. She plans for every redundancy, has THREE PEOPLE and all of them get covid at once?!?!

(On a related note, I'm surprised nobody in anything I've been in lately has gotten it so far now that it's all mask-free everywhere.)
posted by jenfullmoon at 12:18 PM on May 2, 2022

Random thought: does anyone understand what is going on in TAL this week? I'm not going to FPP it because I don't get it, but it's NFT drama.
posted by jenfullmoon at 12:38 PM on May 2, 2022 [1 favorite]

The only thing in my world that matters this week is the Star Trek: Strange New Worlds premiere on Thursday.
posted by briank at 12:43 PM on May 2, 2022

Best non-GUI word processor ever was WordPerfect.

Borland Sprint gang, rise up!

I've actually taken to just using a combination of vim or the TRS-80 Model 100/102's TEXT program and doing everything in XeTeX. iVim is a damned fine iOS port of vim with pretty acceptable integration (including some access to the filesystem), and it's not too hard to lash it up to a real computer to do compilation and linting. A late model iPad, the more-or-less acceptable Apple Magic Keyboard, iVim, and something to SSH into more or less solve all my document processing problems.
posted by majick at 1:03 PM on May 2, 2022 [2 favorites]

Paradox got me headed down the road of what would be a 20 year career in IT/DB/Delphi stuff.

Borland4lyfe!
posted by Windopaene at 1:19 PM on May 2, 2022 [1 favorite]

The only thing in my world that matters this week is the Star Trek: Strange New Worlds premiere on Thursday

58 years later than envisioned, Pike gets his show.
posted by ricochet biscuit at 1:24 PM on May 2, 2022

Certain Supertramp songs are overplayed and I need never hear again. But Supertramp remains one of my favorite groups of all time that I rarely listen to. "Even in the Quietest Moments" is amazing, for example. Such odd singing in that group. Such odd music that doesn't sound like anything else, really. One of a kind.
posted by SoberHighland at 2:44 PM on May 2, 2022 [1 favorite]

Is Supertramp the group that has nothing on YouTube? Or did 5 years ago or so?

I had a coworker who every time some classic rock band came on would say "I would listen to more of their stuff but none of it is on YouTube". I think it was Supertramp.

Roger Hodgson's solo album is a favorite of mine. Give Me Love, Give Me Life is one of those "make me feel good about life" jams that fits right in to my life in good ways.
posted by hippybear at 3:02 PM on May 2, 2022

I started writing an askme about this but it's actually too embarrassing so I'm just going to throw out there if anyone has any home remedies for "my brain feels like a record player trying to play a record that has no grooves on it" other than "see a doctor and take time off", because that's all I can come up with.
posted by bleep at 3:12 PM on May 2, 2022

I'd prescribe two hits of acid, and call me in the morning. IANAD.
posted by hippybear at 3:16 PM on May 2, 2022 [2 favorites]

It's not embarrassing, bleep. Ask about it. Someone has the same / similar feeling about what they are or were experiencing, and maybe they found or are finding a way to address it. We all have weird mind worms these days, pretty much. Solidarity!
posted by taz at 3:30 PM on May 2, 2022 [2 favorites]

This thread is living it all, yes it's living it all
And it's giving it all, and it's giving it all

Also, you should read The Year of Our War.
posted by signal at 3:55 PM on May 2, 2022

Two hits?

Seems like that may be a bit much...
posted by Windopaene at 4:55 PM on May 2, 2022

"my brain feels like a record player trying to play a record that has no grooves on it"

I'd prescribe two hits of acid, and call me in the morning. IANAD.

Two hits?

Seems like that may be a bit much...

They have no grooves. They are no longer groovy. They need regrooving. This is not a light matter.
posted by hippybear at 5:33 PM on May 2, 2022 [3 favorites]

Two hits
Four hits
Six hits
A Dollar
All good trips stand up and holler
posted by zengargoyle at 5:40 PM on May 2, 2022

Was $5 back in my day.

(same as in town)
posted by hippybear at 5:42 PM on May 2, 2022

summertime's here kiddies and it's time to take a trip
posted by pyramid termite at 6:08 PM on May 2, 2022

Roller blades, but like unicycles with one giant wheel on each foot

And a motor.
posted by flabdablet at 9:31 PM on May 2, 2022

I have every Supertramp album through Brother Where You Bound and I listen to all of them pretty regularly except BWYB from which I only listen to "Cannonball". For JustSayNoDawg, I shall give BWYB a new try.

-

Scripsit for TRS-80 was the word processor that we used in college as our [physics] department had it.
posted by neuron at 10:03 PM on May 2, 2022 [2 favorites]

I just came from the first training for the murder mystery company. This sounds really cool, actually. I'm feeling slightly intimidated but also intrigued? More to come. Also would give me something to do in between shows since I'm skipping The Music Man (eh...also I hate Shipoopi...).
posted by jenfullmoon at 10:04 PM on May 2, 2022

If you like weird and obscure rock 'n roll music I recommend a couple of programs on KRVM, a noncommercial station in Eugene, Oregon that's owned and operated by the school district. The programs are "The Time Traveler" [Mondays] and "Soundscapes" [Sundays]. I also like "Sunday Swing Shift" for music from the 1920-40s. Each of these programs is 2 hours long.
posted by neuron at 10:07 PM on May 2, 2022

Am looking for bumper sticker ideas for our new car. It looks so much like every other car that I've accidentally tried to unlock a stranger's car, mistaking it for mine.
Need to put some identifying marks on it.

I'm beginning to think the Internet is wrong...

This could work.

Any ideas for pro cycling slogans?
Or genre fiction references.
Or just plain odd statements. I'm considering

out of order

or

may contain nuts

as well.
posted by Zumbador at 10:22 PM on May 2, 2022

I have four large black T shirts with

inner
city
latte
sipper
in large white lowercase Arial on the back, and another four with

socialist
goon
Both of these would make fine bumper stickers, if you don't mind having your car vandalized by cowardly arseholes when you're not looking. This risk seems lower to me with T shirts, though probably only because I am a six foot bearded man and quite large with it.
posted by flabdablet at 10:35 PM on May 2, 2022 [1 favorite]

5) God knows it wants to break free

I didn't know what day it was when my senses returned.
I just knew I'd come to the end of a long journey.
It might have been an airport, or even a bus depot;
Either way, it didn't matter, I just stepped into bright sunlight.

Out of the machine of cooled air
Into freedom's populated furnace -
I can't describe how good it felt
To feel my shirtsleeves stick to my arms
To breathe the familiar exhaust fumes
To walk in fear of my personal safety.

Seems like I've been gone for a long time but I don't know;
Everything looks the same, everybody still ignores me.
Yeah but somehow there's a different climate,
Like I've led an exactly parallel existence
Where eyes remain wild
And behaviour is less controlled.

Yeah, somewhere on this infested sphere
I will hear surf music again
Even if I don't want to.

The income and the outgoings of my emotion will once more reflect
The musical needs of a deprived mind.

And the reflection is this.
posted by flabdablet at 10:52 PM on May 2, 2022

Fire Archive
posted by flabdablet at 10:57 PM on May 2, 2022

zumbador: Any ideas for pro cycling slogans?
"Cyclist by right, car driver by licence."
"MAMIL is a stage of evolution." (Middle-aged Man In Lycra)

"Not Self-Driving! Unpredictable Human Pilots!"
posted by k3ninho at 11:14 PM on May 2, 2022 [1 favorite]

I ♥ Bumper Stickers

My other car is an honor student

You're closer than you appear
posted by MrVisible at 11:39 PM on May 2, 2022 [2 favorites]

Am looking for bumper sticker ideas for our new car. It looks so much like every other car that I've accidentally tried to unlock a stranger's car, mistaking it for mine.
Need to put some identifying marks on it.
posted by Zumbador

If you have rails on top...
Bright colored duct tape on the roof rails. I put nonstick flagging tape on first for an alternative surface that can be easily removed without damaging the chrome rail finish.
I only did about eight inches on each rail in sky blue duct tape. Now I can see my generic silver grey car across a parking lot filled with the same.
I would be willing to stick something above the roofline to get the same effect (a flag on a radio antenna, add-on roof rails, etc.)
Oddly enough, today I found myself three spaces down from another Toyota Tundra in Desert Sand. Weird. I did not stick around to see if someone else had the same keys.
posted by TrishaU at 2:29 AM on May 3, 2022 [2 favorites]

Anyone else getting constant server errors for metafilter?
posted by We put our faith in Blast Hardcheese at 7:57 AM on May 3, 2022

Yesterday I saw a bumper sticker that said Aubrey/Maturin 2020.
posted by neuron at 8:34 AM on May 3, 2022 [2 favorites]

No web errors.

As for car decorations- we get custom vinyl cut outs from Etsy. Album art. Movie characters. Fav quotes.

Easy peasy.

So far the oldest has lasted at least 4 years without issue.
posted by zenon at 9:42 AM on May 3, 2022 [1 favorite]

I was browsing around on Apple TV last night and discovered that they have MTV-style music videos. Click the link, and it opens mid-song into a music video channel. It was very retro-nice. Apparently it's been around since 2020, so it didn't take me *too* long to find it.
posted by hydra77 at 9:56 AM on May 3, 2022

Anyone else getting constant server errors for metafilter?

Got a 5xx once, early this morning. It triggered a whisper of JRun trauma. Hasn't come up again but I haven't been browsing intensively.
posted by majick at 9:58 AM on May 3, 2022

As I was sitting around with my computer playing random songs on Apple Music and doing a Udemy course, it came up to Peter Gabriel's "Solsbury Hill". This one has been a favorite of mine for a long, long time and now, just now, it hit me again how much of a theme for my life it is.

The first verse, this time, is me listening to myself for the first time in forever as I realized I was trans.

The second verse is that time of joyful terror as I try to decide what the hell to do now.

And the third is the acceptance, that I am not the man I thought I was, I am the woman I really am.

Watched by empty silhouettes
Who close their eyes but still can see
No one taught them etiquette
I will show another me.
Today I don't need a replacement
I'll show them what the smile on my face meant
My heart going boom boom boom,
"Hey," I said, "You can keep my things
they've come to take me home."

I'm me. The parts of me I ignored for so many years... they came to take me home to myself.
posted by mephron at 10:50 AM on May 3, 2022 [8 favorites]

A few random server errors today. Past 5 or 6 hours.
posted by zengargoyle at 11:11 AM on May 3, 2022

They released the teaser trailer for the Weird Al 'biopic' today. I am really excited for it. If you're curious about how he might do, Daniel Radcliffe can be seen acting as a musical performer on Miracle Workers.
posted by Quonab at 11:53 AM on May 3, 2022 [2 favorites]

I just made my second pro-market S.F. sale, and I have this AskMe to thank.
posted by signal at 12:01 PM on May 3, 2022 [3 favorites]

Shockingly (not), we will not be getting a 4 day workweek in California after all. (SacBee link) Someone posted the other week why aren't more people excited about this, and well...duh....?
posted by jenfullmoon at 12:43 PM on May 3, 2022 [1 favorite]

So, as the The Elephant in the Courtroom now closed I don't know where to put the following but here:

Join Us For A Historic Nonhuman Rights Hearing and Rally -- on May 18, 2022 at the New York Court of Appeals in Albany, New York.
posted by y2karl at 1:48 PM on May 3, 2022

Don't Be Ridiculous! ------t-shirt or bumpersticker
My Other Ride
IS This Car!

M(heiroglyphic eye) Car. Any random sun sticker, or three.
posted by Oyéah at 2:12 PM on May 3, 2022 [1 favorite]

I could use some legal advice on Pet Rental Fees. I recently adopted a 2 yr old cat because I needed a friend right now. She's great, but I'm also in the middle of a lease renewal of my apt and they want to slap on another $200 deposit (understood) and $50 a month for pet fees? My cat is 10 lbs and I clean up after it. Why am I paying ostensibly for another roommate and how do I get around it?
posted by hairless ape at 3:38 PM on May 3, 2022 [1 favorite]

If you're curious about how he might do, Daniel Radcliffe can be seen acting as a musical performer on Miracle Workers

Radcliffe was on Broadway in How To Succeed In Business Without Really Trying, and he performed on the Tonys one year. It's QUITE a number, too! [5m40s]
posted by hippybear at 4:13 PM on May 3, 2022

Also, because I just rewatched THAT dance number, now I'm going to report Naatu Naatu for anyone who missed it the first time.
posted by hippybear at 4:18 PM on May 3, 2022

um... repost. going to repost it. not report it.

except to report it as TOTALLY AWESOME!!!
posted by hippybear at 4:26 PM on May 3, 2022

Simone Giertz started a store because she wants to be an inventor and make things, and she is. I find that very touching, somehow.
posted by jenfullmoon at 9:18 PM on May 3, 2022 [1 favorite]

I have spent all week in Coachella for a wedding. I understand the wierdness of SoCal retirees now, and am disgusted by the amount of energy and resources we use to maintain these resort towns. But man, sitting in the mineral water pool all night after hiking Joshua Tree with a bunch of indie film producers feels pretty damn amazing.
posted by gwydapllew at 3:57 AM on May 4, 2022 [2 favorites]

Ten years this week since the penny was discontinued in Canada. I well recall the debates between those who felt that it was a useless and outmoded coin which cost more than its own value to manufacture and those who believed that as the fundamental unit of our currency, we should have continued to produce them.

In other words, some felt there was no need for change but others felt there was no need for change.
posted by ricochet biscuit at 8:02 AM on May 4, 2022 [9 favorites]

I'm going to report Naatu Naatu yt for anyone who missed it the first time.

I missed it the first time. Brilliant! Thanks!

(It's also good to remember how easy it can be to understand people who speak a language that I don't know a word of. At least, I think I understand it, though I expect I'm missing many significant details. At the very least, I like it.)
posted by eotvos at 8:05 AM on May 4, 2022

RRR (where Naatu Naatu is from) is on fanfare if anyone wants to talk about it :)
posted by cendawanita at 8:31 AM on May 4, 2022 [1 favorite]

RRR where Naatu Naatu isn't from is not on Fanfare but definitely worth a regular listen.
posted by flabdablet at 9:15 AM on May 4, 2022 [1 favorite]

@ricochet biscuit: Once the decision was made, have there been any grumblings wishing the penny were back? Is everything just rounded up/down as needed for those paying in cash? Are prices for everything rounded to the nearest 5/0 regardless of payment method?
posted by hydra77 at 12:57 PM on May 4, 2022

I planted every living thing I bought to put in my garden. Now for more soil prep, digging and seeding. Yes, I am a disgusting retiree, I love my little garden. The gas pricing makes it too expensive to travel and litter hot springs with my elderlyness. Before long I will be outdoor showering at night, to water my lawn and garden. I have a big old galvanized washtub. I have always meant to get a wringer for the side, and experiment with hand washing clothes. Soapy water for the grass, and ivy: rinse water for the garden, the last rinse water. Anyway. The first rinse water, according to myth, washes the second load of clothes. I am a true granola hippie, at heart.
posted by Oyéah at 1:22 PM on May 4, 2022 [1 favorite]

I've just been notified that a submission I sent to a big tech conference in America has been accepted into the program. Now I just need to talk work into actually funding my going. Wish me luck.

(Truth be told, I'm doing it partly for the chance to fly business class again. That shit was awesome.)
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 3:16 PM on May 4, 2022 [4 favorites]

Oyéah, during the day zero water crisis I used the water from our laundry machine. Mostly for flushing toilets, sometimes for watering the garden.
I was always surprised at how incredibly filthy that water was. More like black water than grey water. (Not literally, in colour, but in dirtiness classification)
But I didn't separate the different rinses, maybe that would have made a difference. I was too concerned about having enough water for the toilet to let any of it go.
And I suspect there's something about the machine that made the water dirty. Some residue of bacteria brewing between washes.
Truely foul. Probably healthy for plants, though? Who knows.
The water came from our rain water tank in the first place. I rigged up a bucket with a tap that poured rain water into the soap dispenser.
Made doing the laundry a lot more interesting than usual.

In other news, I had one of those "this could only happen during a pandemic" absurd moments yesterday.
My sister was in an all day (!) zoom meeting for her work. She suddenly popped out of the room and asked me for help.
Her gigantic Maine Coon kitten Oscar ( aka Drogman, a much better name for him in *my* opinion) had brought a juvenile squirrel into the room and she wanted me to catch it.
So while my sister was doing a the classic zoom meeting thing, ("can you still hear me?") I was hunting around the room for this young squirrel.
I found it hiding behind a bookcase. It ran up my arm onto my shoulder, then leaped off, ran over my sister's feet and disappeared again.
By this time I'd seen enough of it to tell that it hadn't been hurt by the cat so I just left the door to the garden open.
This is a little video of the cat. I don't think he's fully grown yet, but he's already huge.
posted by Zumbador at 9:12 PM on May 4, 2022 [2 favorites]

during the day zero water crisis I used the water from our laundry machine. Mostly for flushing toilets, sometimes for watering the garden.
I was always surprised at how incredibly filthy that water was. More like black water than grey water.

Needs must, but probably best not to flush with grey water except when needs genuinely do must. Grey water quickly turns black and washing machine drainage is rich in microbial nutrients, both from the detergent that's in it and from what washes out of the clothes. Best reuse option for washing machine drainage is to get it into garden soil as soon as possible after it comes out of the machine, so that you're feeding those nutrients to soil microbes you want instead of waterborne anaerobic stink makers you don't.

If you're going to go that way, be careful with the detergents you choose. A lot of detergents that claim to be environmentally friendly make that claim on the basis of being low-phosphorus, but phosphorus is a plant nutrient and a good thing to be adding to garden soil (in moderation). It's exactly because it is a plant nutrient that it causes trouble when it finds its way into waterways, because then the main plants it's going to feed will be algal blooms. Stuff that gets used instead of phosphorus compounds in modern washing detergents often includes quite high levels of boron and sodium, neither of which is particularly problematic when diluted in a waterway but both of which can quickly salt and poison garden soil if applied repeatedly. Liquid laundry detergents usually contain quite a lot less sodium than powders.

Best way I know to test whether the "eco friendly" claims of any given laundry detergent manufacturer are actually justifiable is running an extension of the washing machine's drainage hose out to one specific patch of lawn grass, in a spot with enough topsoil under the grass to retain that amount of water rather than draining it away somewhere unexpected. If the grass in that patch starts to look a bit sad, I'll stop the trial and pick a different spot for the next one. If it does better than the rest of the lawn after six months of soaking up washing machine drainage, then that brand of detergent is one I'll buy again.
posted by flabdablet at 11:01 PM on May 4, 2022 [1 favorite]

If you're making your own soap for washing clothes with, granola munching hippie style, then wood ash is a much more soil-friendly basis for it than commercial lye because the main mineral in wood ash is potassium while commercial lye is sodium based. It's way easier to poison topsoil with sodium than with potassium.
posted by flabdablet at 11:09 PM on May 4, 2022 [1 favorite]

Yes I learned all about grey water during the day zero water crisis. :)
We had very little rain water, and our tap water allowance was for brushing teeth, cooking, and washing dishes.
So even stinky grey water was used to flush the toilet for a day, after which it became too stinky to use for anything but the garden.
We were disposing of our urine in the garden or directly down the drain, and toilet paper went in a separate bin, so toilets only got flushed for poops.
Water from washing the dishes was even dirtier and often too oily for anything but pouring down the drain.
We were getting ready to set up a composting toilet for when the water completely ran out, but luckily it didn't come to that - the (heroic!) farmers gambled that it would rain again that winter and gave their water allowance to the city.
And luckily it *did* rain again that winter.
We still flush with left over bath water (oh luxury! To have enough water left over from a bath to flush a toilet with! On a regular basis!) and rain water.
I wash my clothes with tap water now, and sometimes more than once a week! And I let that stinky water go right down the drain.
posted by Zumbador at 11:29 PM on May 4, 2022

Once the decision was made, have there been any grumblings wishing the penny were back? Is everything just rounded up/down as needed for those paying in cash? Are prices for everything rounded to the nearest 5/0 regardless of payment method?

None to speak of, yes, and no, in that order. The figures are reckoned as they were before and it’s only an issue if you pay electronically to get the forty-three or eighty-one cents or whatever. In cash, you would pay to the nearest five cents. I suppose there are a few people who are bitter about it, but there are inevitably some folks who prefer Wednesday to Thursday just because it was Wednesday.

The only time it was an issue for me was the first day that the rounding started: at the grocery store I picked up a few things and the total was let us say $14.12. I produced some cash and said, “I think I’ve got the twelve cents,” and the cashier said no need — ten cents was all I needed.

There were briefly people talking of their plans to game the system, paying in cash for items rounded down (i.e. where the grand total came out to a figure ending in 1, 2, 6, or 7) and electronically at all other times. It soon became obvious that this program of constantly shifting one’s payment method would put one ahead by the price of a sandwich every year or two if done assiduously. Rather than constantly work at this, the prospective penny-pincher could get a minimum wage job, quit after one day, and still be come out net ahead of the game for a decade or so.
posted by ricochet biscuit at 11:42 PM on May 4, 2022 [1 favorite]

After finally becoming a citizen back in September, I'll be voting for the very first time in the UK later today. I am weirdly excited.
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 6:37 AM on May 5, 2022 [4 favorites]

I cannot get any paywall-bypasser thing to work today, but this Monica Hesse WaPo rant about "all I want for Mother's Day is a vaccine for my baby" is quite something.

What I would like for Mother’s Day this year is a new duvet cover, some sunglasses, a professional carpet cleaning for the dining room rug, and a [expletive] vaccine for my [expletive] child.
I am writing this column from the basement of my in-laws’ home in an active living retirement community, where my family has been mooching child care in the waning days of the pandemic, and where my primary means of entertaining my 10-month-old daughter is taking her to watch athletic 85-year-olds play pickle ball, and I can honestly say that we are very lucky and also that what I would like for Mother’s Day this year is a [expletive] vaccine for my [expletive] child.

The FDA now says vaccines for children younger than 5 might be available as soon as June. Ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha.

What I would like for Mother’s Day is to go back in time to the part of the pandemic when officials were still saying things like “We’re all in it together.” I would like them to clarify that what they actually meant was, “We’re all in it together until most of us get antibodies, at which point the parents of uninfected infants and toddlers are in it by themselves.” I would like them to take a hard look at the double-helix of boredom and rage that lives inside parents who still have to ask off work because there’s been a covid outbreak in the toddler room at day care and somebody has to look after the kid. Because we are most certainly in it by ourselves.
If I read another statistic about how working mothers have borne the brunt of the pandemic I will open the window and make incoherent pterodactyl noises for nine minutes straight, because there’s a point at which reading that it’s crap for all working moms doesn’t feel helpful. It feels as though America is doing what it does best: acknowledging that working moms are frequently placed in impossible spots, and then pretending we can make up for it by giving them a holiday where they eat a pancake in bed.

There is no “before” to return to. There are no sustaining memories of what it could look like to be a parent in a time without covid. I delivered my daughter while wearing an N95 mask and birthed this fragile, soft human into a world that is impossibly beautiful, which she has seen not nearly enough of. I will show it to her, all of it, as soon as I can lift her gently in my arms, hold her tight, and then pin her down on an exam table so a nurse can come at her good with a needle.
For Mother’s Day I [expletive] want a [expletive] [expletive] vaccine for my [expletive] child. It is the only thing I want. Also a bottle of good dry shampoo.

posted by jenfullmoon at 9:21 AM on May 5, 2022 [3 favorites]

If you want to really understand where we are on Covid, follow Eric Topol on Twitter. He's a physician and molecular biologist, so his posts are fairly technical. He posted a screencap of his recent essay for the LA Times (an abominable website). In summary: the future is not bright and you should not wear shades or rose-colored glasses.
posted by neuron at 9:26 AM on May 5, 2022

Really good article in the NYT today about the huge wildfire in NE New Mexico and its effects on the centuries-old communities there. This fire is adjacent to the Pecos Wilderness, which is my favorite place in the world, having spent 2 weeks in it every summer growing up.
posted by neuron at 9:29 AM on May 5, 2022 [1 favorite]

Petty bitching: I hit 20 years at work and they left me out of the giant office presentation...again. I don't want to be a whiny complainer who yells "PAY ATTENTION TO MEEEEEEEEEE!" or have them be obviously "oh, we forgot, last minute kudos" about it later if I say anything, but it still sucks.
posted by jenfullmoon at 9:43 AM on May 5, 2022 [3 favorites]

It soon became obvious that this program of constantly shifting one’s payment method would put one ahead by the price of a sandwich every year or two if done assiduously.

Yeah but have you seen the price of sandwiches lately??
posted by Greg_Ace at 11:30 AM on May 5, 2022

and a [expletive] vaccine for my [expletive] child.

Incidentally, "Expletive Child" is the name of my new band.
posted by Greg_Ace at 11:31 AM on May 5, 2022

A womb of one's own.
posted by Oyéah at 2:27 PM on May 5, 2022 [1 favorite]

We were getting ready to set up a composting toilet for when the water completely ran out, but luckily it didn't come to that

The temporary setup we used at our house while I was remodelling the bathroom was essentially a Loveable Loo improvised from zero-cost parts, and it worked extremely well. Super easy setup, never a hint of low-grade miasma permeating the room, and low (but not zero) maintenance. It does rely completely on having a ready supply of sawdust, so it might be a good idea to lay in a few sacks of that before the next severe drought.

What we had instead of a working flush toilet was a 25 litre plastic bucket, the tall strong kind that paint or bulk mayonnaise come packed in, with the seat and lid from our existing toilet just perched on top of it. That seat is plastic and it just so happened that the lip around its hole engaged nicely with the top of the bucket, meaning that we didn't need anything else to support it; the bucket was reassuringly sturdy and a good height as well. We got our bucket from a neighbour who worked at a place that makes prepackaged meals but I've often seen them discarded in building site dumpsters too.

Using it was easy. I preloaded the bucket with a two inch layer of sawdust, then every time somebody crapped in it we'd "flush" by covering over our leavings with a soup can full of fresh sawdust. At our house it took about a week for the bucket to get three quarters full, at which point I'd just take it outside and empty the whole thing straight into the middle of our existing hot compost heap. The sawdust will also cope with deodorising small amounts of urine, but depositing as much of that as possible directly outdoors makes emptying the bucket less unpleasant.

I wasn't expecting this thing to work anywhere near as well as it did, but as it turned out, having no flush toilet available was easily the least annoying thing about the bathroom being unavailable. If we were facing water supply restrictions that made using mains water for flushing unacceptable, I would set up another one in a heartbeat rather than put up with stinky buckets of grey water lying about in the bathroom.
posted by flabdablet at 7:08 PM on May 5, 2022 [1 favorite]

I cannot get any paywall-bypasser thing to work today, but this Monica Hesse WaPo rant about "all I want for Mother's Day is a vaccine for my baby" is quite something.

It is indeed, and Bypass Paywalls Clean has just let me read it without any trouble.

This extension gets updates every few days, and by default it wants your explicit permission for each new site it works with every time that happens, but visiting its options and turning "Show options on update" off and "Enable new sites by default" on gets rid of that minor annoyance.
posted by flabdablet at 7:32 PM on May 5, 2022 [2 favorites]

I hit 20 years at work and they left me out of the giant office presentation...again.

I have never worked for the same employer for 20 years (13 and a bit was my longest) but if I had, and they'd just treated me like part of the furniture like that, I'd be leaning very strongly toward not sticking around for another 20.
posted by flabdablet at 8:06 PM on May 5, 2022

Heh, I'm the opposite of flabdablet. I would have freaked out being mentioned in a company presentation of any sort. Might be a neuroatypical thing but I spent a few years making sure boss' wouldn't do that to me and I would find any excuse to not even be there in the first place. Guess I'm furniture. Sweet!
posted by zengargoyle at 9:08 PM on May 5, 2022

Flabdablet, thanks for the information on the composting toilet. It's pretty close to what we were planning but a lot neater. Our problem is that we don't really have a garden, just a small (tiny!) backyard that I've hacked all the concrete out of and replaced with plants.
Our compost heap is more of a small compost bin, and hardly big enough to manage the veggie peelings of a two person family, never mind the output of a toilet.
I was researching the legalities of disposing the stuff, not easy. Especially not in a situation where the entire city worth of people would have been similarly in crisis and trying to dispose of poop.
I did find a project that created a fantastic composting toilet designed for our informal settlements, which relied on a service that would collect the waste every month. But they were already over stretched managing that system and not available to us.
I'm sure all kinds of entrepreneurs would have popped out of the woodwork to make money out of the oppertunity, but who knows what form that would have taken. Pretending to be eco friendly, but actually dumping everything in the nearest green space?
It's one of the things I found frustrating about composting toilets. All the instructions assume you live on a farm, or have a garden big enough to absorb the waste.
Really brought home to me how solutions like this need to be community wide systems, and not individuals looking after themselves.
I mean, what about people in blocks of flats?
Or any kind of urban situation.
posted by Zumbador at 9:34 PM on May 5, 2022 [1 favorite]

... actually forgot about it till now, but the best solution I found to processing poop compost was soldier fly larvae. If you can get hold of them. Still produces compost that you need to dispose of, but they are way, way faster than anything else I've seen. I once had the luck of getting some in my compost bin and they ground their way through it in record time.
Apparently some of the experimental farms near here use them so maybe I could have got some there.
posted by Zumbador at 10:05 PM on May 5, 2022

BSFL will happily chew their way through endless amounts of what comes out of a Loveable Loo but they do need proper housing so that they don't asphyxiate in the attempt.

Do you have a 1x1 metre square of exposable soil somewhere in your back yard? Because all you need to turn that into a cubic metre of hot compost, which will easily keep up with a Loveable Loo once it gets cooking, is four old pallets to tie together at the corners for retaining walls, and a foot or so of leaf litter and/or old compost bin contents to dump inside for a starter bed.

Tap a garden stake into the centre once the leaf litter is in, then start adding compostable materials. Once it's full to about half way up the walls, give the stake a good wobbling about to make a chimney maybe four inches wide up through the middle of the heap, then pull the stake out. Give it a day or two and it will start steaming, at which point you'll actually struggle to keep the level up if all you're feeding it is a weekly toilet bucket. Use the stake to re-open the chimney after dumping each new bucket down the existing opening.

If you can find two 1x1 metre patches, so much the better; the first one will eventually fill up with finished or near-finished compost and at that point it's better to leave it undisturbed to mature for a couple of months.

The difference in decomposition rate between the typical closed-top plastic compost bin and a well ventilated heap that's big enough to retain the heat that proper aerobic breakdown both produces and relies upon has to be experienced to be believed. It's at least as fast as BSFL chewing through the same volume of feed material, though it is more sensitive to the carbon:nitrogen ratio of what you feed it. If most of what goes into the hot centre of a nicely working heap comes out of a Lovable Loo, it's pretty easy to tweak that C:N ratio just by controlling the amount of urine that ends up in the bucket. And if your steaming heap tends to dry out at all, there is no better place to sling a bucket of kitchen sink drain water.
posted by flabdablet at 11:57 PM on May 5, 2022

day care is so interesting - you never know what you'll find in some kid's backpack
posted by pyramid termite at 6:46 AM on May 6, 2022 [3 favorites]

A slim jim and a live turtle are not things I've ever brought to school. But, it resonates.
posted by eotvos at 7:58 AM on May 6, 2022

Welp, the ozzy household finally got COVID this week. It had to have come from our daughter's school, based on timing, and I am 100% sure none of the kids in her class wear masks or get tested when they feel sick. She spent 2ish days stuffy and hoarse and coughing, and is fine now. mrsozzy and I finally tested positive yesterday, and spent the day feeling like death (lightly) warmed over, but I think we're both already feeling much better today.

I'm annoyed, but grateful we didn't spend time indoors with our (extremely immunocompromised) parents over last weekend, when our daughter was certainly contagious.

What am I going to do during my upcoming brief window of super-immunity? Probably see the new Nic Cage movie. And have a really good meal. In a restaurant.
posted by uncleozzy at 8:18 AM on May 6, 2022

but if I had, and they'd just treated me like part of the furniture like that, I'd be leaning very strongly toward not sticking around for another 20.

I can't get hired anywhere else. The things I am good at are not valued and what I am bad at is what's wanted. That said, this was an upper management thing, my boss didn't act like this at all.

At least I'm leaving halfway through the day to go to a hippie festival, so yay there.
posted by jenfullmoon at 8:50 AM on May 6, 2022 [2 favorites]

I got my first paycheck from my new job today! I managed to be a member of The Great Resignation and end up with a job I like more with a pay schedule that will quickly get me above what I was making at my previous job after 10 years.

I almost want to go back by my old job and tell all of them they're fools for continuing to work THAT hard for THAT little money. But none of those people were my friends, and what do I care? I'd just be doing it to gloat, and that's a petty emotion.
posted by hippybear at 3:14 PM on May 6, 2022 [5 favorites]

A fun one, though...
posted by Greg_Ace at 3:21 PM on May 6, 2022 [1 favorite]

and that's a petty emotion

nothing wrong with petty emotions. you couldn't help thinkin' that there was a little more to work/life balance somewhere else. after all it was a brand new world with lots of jobs to apply to.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 3:37 PM on May 6, 2022 [2 favorites]

You felt summer creepin in and were tired of that job again
posted by the primroses were over at 4:15 PM on May 6, 2022 [2 favorites]

well, you know what's right you got just one life
in a job that keeps on pushin' the attack
you won't take no smack and you won't go back
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 6:43 PM on May 6, 2022 [1 favorite]

it's the working that's the hardest part
everyday you punch your time card
you work away your faith, you work away your heart
it's the working that's the hardest part
posted by the primroses were over at 8:00 PM on May 6, 2022 [2 favorites]

I keep watching this video, Alice Phoebe Lou singing “Walk on the Wild Side”. I think some of you would really dig it.
posted by Glinn at 6:19 AM on May 7, 2022 [2 favorites]

I asked my manager not to announce that I'd been there 20 years. I did get a large block of lucite in the post though, and hid it in my on-camera background for a while, before putting it back in it's box and stacking it with the other things.
posted by inpHilltr8r at 5:10 PM on May 7, 2022 [1 favorite]

I had a funny thing happen. I got my 15 year package after only 4 years. A pin, a catalog to pick something and a big envelope of benefits. I lol'd, boss lol'd, we waited it out. HR had made the mistake of calculating things from my very first student worker job there... 15 years ago. Took them a while, but I got to keep the pin and order from the catalog but benefits were a nope. Then there's the time I was out for several months on medical leave and came back, it took me another several months to realize I wasn't getting paid. Another oops.

Bonus: my boss was also my supervisor at that first job those 15 years ago. It took me far too long to actually realize that fact.
posted by zengargoyle at 4:43 PM on May 8, 2022

I got to keep the pin and order from the catalog

Did you go for the finger traps, the egg bar, or the waffle party?
posted by flabdablet at 9:41 PM on May 8, 2022